“No…no…no…” Didi whimpered repeatedly as she put a hand to her forehead. She sunk deep into the chair. “What have I gotten myself into?” she sobbed.
“OK…well. I can understand that’s not exactly what you wanted to hear, given the circumstances,” Raju backpedaled, speaking with incredible speed and intensity, “Don’t get me wrong! I’m not saying he was justified in plucking out their eyeballs and juggling them and then, uh… throwing them in the air and …(ahem)… catching them in his mouth. He was just goofing around, that’s all! That’s so Anup! I guess you had to be there. You might have found it funnier if you had seen it with your own uh… eyes. Anyway, let’s not get sensitive about it, eh? After all, that elderly couple did owe him the money. But I understand. You owe him money, too, so naturally this concerns you. And you’re perfectly entitled to feel that way! I apologize! His sense of humor is probably not the best thing to talk about right now. My mistake. I imagine you think him a horrific sadist for committing these sorts of atrocities. Funny or not: I suppose he does get a bit carried away…” Another half hour had now passed and Raju was still trying to sell Didi on the finer points of Anup’s character: “…so, yes, he can have his terrifying moments, but that’s not all there is to him. If you knew him like I did, you would probably also know that he was still the kind of person who would move mountains to help his friends. This is something I still have no doubts about. He and I had struck up a friendship through my father after he became a regular patron of the saloon; Anup used to work there as an apprentice barkeep back in his younger days. I guess it’s kind of funny now to think that Anup had once worked for Guni. By the time I left Vasalla, the situation had probably reversed itself, considering Guni’s frequent business dealings with the Vasallan underworld and Anup’s growingly remarkable criminal talents. Anyway, back when I first met him, it was usually when I was out looking for my father so that we could finish up the chores at the farm. Anup would usually be tending bar and the two of us would have casual chats whenever the situation arose. My friendship with him deepened after the war between Ieyasu and Ryunosuke began. The market prices for Lesser Bison eggs had started to tumble putting my father and me into financial dire straits. My father was forced to sell off half his land just to make ends meet. To make matters worse, most of his livestock had been requisitioned by Ieyasu’s army for their food supply. My father soon became very depressed at his failure as a farmer and businessman and started drinking more heavily. He would sometimes disappear from the farm for days on end. Half of the time I was able to track him down; the other half, it was clear he didn’t want to be found. Whatever the case, he was still needed for the everyday operations of the farm. So, I went around to Guni’s saloon a couple times a day just to seek him out. Anup was usually there and I could always depend on him to let me know my father’s whereabouts, as he seemed to stop in for a drink at least 3 to 4 times a day. It wasn’t long before I, too, became a regular there and got to know both Anup and Guni very well. Sometimes, after closing time Anup would leave the back door unlocked and I would sneak in and the two of us would drink on the house, unbeknownst to Guni. That really was a nice time of my life. I sometimes miss those days. Vasalla was probably a different place then. I know that if I went back now, some of the people I knew may still be there, but it just wouldn’t be the same; we wouldn’t really be able to recapture that feeling we once had. I guess that’s what happens when you let your youth get behind you. I imagine that if we all met up now, all we could do is reminisce together about those days we lost. Anup would likely do the same; it was a pretty special time and place to be alive and young...but I suppose life moves on whether you like it or not. You know, when I think back to those times, those amazing memories I share with Anup, I can’t help but feel that the others have judged him too harshly. Really! I don’t know the details exactly, but I think he had a tough childhood, not unlike my wife…and it’s had lasting effects on his character. But I suppose that’s Anup. And that’s maybe a side of him most haven’t gotten to see yet. Which is understandable. I mean, he has a tendency to rub people the wrong way. I guess most people aren’t that quick to forgive someone who beheads and eviscerates his debtors for non-payment…and who then plucks their eyeballs out or takes their leftover body parts and makes fancy-dress costumes out of them. Sure, I can see why that might upset some people. But they just misunderstand his personality, that’s all! If you ask me, I think a lot of the things that he does are rooted in shyness. I guess the thing about him is he’s wound so tight that he sometimes feels a bit awkward in social situations. As a result, some might mistake him for being some kind of sociopath. But if you ask me, I think he’s just a bit bashful. He doesn’t really know how to express himself properly and as a result his emotions tend to manifest themselves in other…perhaps, less conventional ways. I don’t know, though. Maybe even I don’t quite understand him. He’s a rather complex individual. So, I think it’s sometimes best to give the poor guy the benefit of the doubt. Someone has to. You know?”
“Raju?”
“So, while I understand your concerns about Anup, I really don’t think you have anything to worry about. The obligations you bear are nothing to lose sleep over, especially now that you are here in the house of Anup’s old friend. In fact, perhaps what he sought from you isn’t as awful as you assumed it to be. He might have known that you were my half-daughter and simply sought to have you relay a greeting to me. It has been a long time since I saw him last, so it wouldn’t be out of the realm of possibility. I don’t know if that sounds too optimistic and far-fetched to you, but knowing what I know about him, I feel your fears are pessimistic and unjustified. Perhaps our approximations of the truth are different in that respect, but it is still important that we not rule out the possibilities, however unlikely. In any case, I know a lot has changed in his life. When I’d first met him, I never really saw him becoming a career criminal. Of course, he had a talent for it and there could be no doubt as to the sharpness of his mind and the ferocity of his ego. I guess I always saw him going in another direction. Actually, I think he had aspirations to be a football coach, for certainly this was a profession in which his ruthless sadism would serve him well. But people’s situations change for one reason or another. After Yuri and I were married, I didn’t see him as often, but I know that he started getting more and more involved with the criminal element that frequented Guni’s bar. And apparently, soon enough, most in the underworld had come to fear him. His ability at invoking the same cruelty that most of us managed to suppress had earned him nothing short of their respect and propelled him to the top of their criminal hierarchy. Soon, he was overseeing the actions of crime bosses all over Kaiiba, ordering them around, administrating their movements and positions—much like a coach. Naturally, his business took him out of town frequently and so the mystique surrounding his persona grew larger and larger. That’s about as much as I know about his criminal side though. Actually, I kind of wonder if Anup still plans to make the jump back to football. He always quite enjoyed the sport and his skills as a criminal mastermind might carry over well into the spectrum of game strategy and political diplomacy. I imagine he’d be fairly good at it…and it’s never too late to make that jump. In any case, you have no reason to fear him while you are under my care. Under our care. OK? It’s easy to allow our fears rooted in anticipation to get the better of us. I’m sure that that’s what has happened with you. You’ve heard too many nasty rumors—it’s all part of the mystique that surrounds Anup. But like I said, old Anup just has a bad reputation because he tends to be misunderstood. So, I don’t think it’s necessary to-“
“Raju!” Yuri said again.
“Hmmm?” He turned to look at her with this expression on his face as though he’d completely forgotten that she was standing there. She, too, didn’t seem the least bit upset anymore. In fact, she seemed rather upbeat, as though that 3 hour long argument had n
ever taken place. Didi wondered if this was some kind of habit that they’d acquired. The ability to reduce arguments to a kind of dormant state that would allow them to be invoked again at a later, more convenient time and with an equal or heightened intensity.
“Would you mind checking on Bunnu and O.? I think they’re in the attic.”
“Right…right,” Raju sighed.
“But before you do that, move those papers out of the way. We’ll need that extra chair.” She pointed at the stack of Ministry reports sitting on the chair.
“I’ll get started on lunch,” She turned to Didi, “Well…I don’t quite share Raju’s optimism about Anup, but it seems we have no choice but to adopt you and all the burdens you bring upon our house. That’s what it means to be a family, right? To share in each others burdens and obligations and blah blah blah. Dry your tears, girl! I’m not trying to get all sappy with you! In fact, I don’t like this situation one bit, but I don’t want to be the sort of monster who turns family away. That’s just not the way I was raised. So, while this matter sorts itself out, we might as well put you to good use. Do you know how to make Aloo Magenta?” Didi shook her head, still in awe of how quickly her new stepmother had managed to adapt to this new situation. She wondered if, perhaps, the woman suffered from a kind of dementia or short-term memory loss. It was quite possible that the woman no longer possessed any knowledge of what had transpired in the last three and a half hours. “I’ll show you.”
As the ladies set to work, Raju picked up the papers and stared at them blankly. He’d had very little time to do them recently as the family was in the midst of a crisis regarding O.’s status as a legal non-entity. “Raju!” Yuri’s voice pierced through his oblivion. “Are you going or not?”
“Oh…Right! Sorry.”
“And change the Outlander’s litter box while you’re up there. It’s starting to smell.”
“Right…right.”
Raju was about to make his way up when there was a knock at the front door. He opened it to see the chubby face of Motiwala. The boy was fatter than ever. “Ahhh…Master Motiwala! Back from our trip, are we?”
“Pardon?” the boy exclaimed.
“Bunnu’s up in the attic with the Outlander.”
“What?!! I can’t hear you!”
“Indeed. Well, anyway…I was just going up there to-”
However, before Raju was able to finish this sentence, he could already hear the sound of little footsteps rushing down the stairs.
The Legal Non-Entity