Page 18 of Gifted Thief


  Both Lexie and Speck shot glances in Brochan’s direction. ‘I told you,’ he said smugly. ‘She wants to stick around.’

  ‘And be a Sidhe?’ Lexie whispered. She stared back at me. ‘Really? I thought you hated them.’

  ‘I do hate them. But there’s more to the story about my parents than I realised. I want to stick around and find out what. If my father wasn’t the murdering bastard that everyone has made him out to be…’

  Lexie smirked. ‘Hell hath no fury like an angry Integrity.’

  I grinned. ‘Indeed.’

  Speck gnawed on his lip. ‘Aren’t you worried about whoever is really trying to kill you?’

  I met his eyes. ‘Frankly, I was expecting it. I get enough looks that could kill when I wander around the castle. A lot of the highborn Sidhe really don’t like me. And they’ve not even spoken to me. I’ve laid the groundwork for them to believe that I’ll have at least one gift emerge in the next few days. I’ve also made a big show of being angry rather than scared. It might buy me some time.’

  Speck wasn’t ready to let it go. ‘That’s all very well, but shouldn’t you be scared? I’m terrified and no one even knows I’m here.’

  ‘I have a secret weapon,’ I said simply. I pulled the scimitar out of my pocket and laid it down.

  ‘You’re going to read their mail?’

  ‘It’s not a letter opener.’

  Lexie frowned. ‘It looks like a letter opener.’

  ‘It’s a scimitar.’

  ‘Tegs, I love you to bits but that’s not a scimitar.’

  I placed my finger to my lips, encouraging her to be silent. ‘Watch.’ I slid the blade out of the sheath but, before I could rub it, there was a painful flash of light. All four of us moaned in sudden pain, covering our eyes.

  ‘Bob,’ I complained, ‘I’d not summoned you yet.’

  ‘Jeez Louise. You tell me to pay attention in case you need me at the drop of a hat then you fling me off to some Sidhe dude who stomps around and shouts a lot and you’re annoyed because I’m listening in and ready to appear when you want me to.’

  He had a point. ‘Okay, okay. But it’s nice to have some warning before you do the flashing thing.’

  He smirked. ‘Flashing? I can do flashing if that’s what you want.’ He began to unbuckle his tiny belt.

  ‘No! That’s quite alright.’

  ‘It’s larger than you’d think.’ He winked at me. ‘Size does matter.’

  I gritted my teeth while the others slowly pulled their hands away from their eyes and gaped.

  ‘What is that?’ Speck asked, recoiling. ‘I don’t like little people. They give me the creeps.’

  Bob stuck out his tongue.

  ‘He’s so cute though!’ Lexie interjected, jabbing Speck in the ribs. It must have been painful because he exhaled loudly and threw her a dirty look.

  ‘I prefer handsome,’ Bob said. ‘Or stud-like. Magnificent will also do. Cute suggests kittens and puppies.’ He shuddered. ‘That’s not me.’

  Brochan, still staring, let out a massive sneeze that startled us all. ‘Genie,’ he said flatly.

  ‘How did you know?’

  ‘I’m allergic.’ He took out an embossed handkerchief and rubbed his nose.

  Bob jumped up and down. ‘You’re allergic to genies? That’s awesome! Let me get closer! Can I make you sneeze on command?’

  ‘Bob,’ I said warningly, ‘that’s enough of that.’

  ‘Uh Integrity, you’re no fun.’

  ‘So you keep saying.’

  Lexie’s brow knitted together. ‘Tegs, you’ve not made a wish, have you? Because that could be related to all the attempts on your life.’

  ‘No,’ I said cheerfully. ‘Those are all Sidhe and nothing to do with Bob. Up till now there have been no wishes.’

  The pixie looked relieved but Speck’s eyes narrowed suspiciously. ‘Up till now?’

  I beckoned all three of them over. We got into a huddle, our backs turned on Bob. ‘I know what the side effects are,’ I whispered. ‘But they’re always related to the wishes themselves.’

  Speck nodded. ‘I heard there was a guy in Fife who came across a genie. He wanted everyone to like him so he wished he could hear everything that was said about him. The genie turned him invisible and he was never heard of again.’

  ‘If he was never heard of again,’ Lexie pointed out, tossing her hair, ‘how did anyone ever hear the story of the wish? Although there was that woman who wished to be younger and ended up trapped in the body of a baby. That was real.’

  Speck scowled at her. ‘Why is your story real and mine isn’t?’

  Brochan rolled his eyes. ‘Enough. Either way, wishes always go wrong. This is a bad idea, Tegs. You can’t trust genies.’

  ‘I can still hear you, you know,’ Bob piped up from behind. ‘I’m not deaf. I’m not evil either.’

  ‘I know all that,’ I told them, ignoring Bob. ‘It’s why I’ve not asked for anything yet, despite what’s happened.’ I didn’t bother mentioning that I would have tried when the stoor worm attacked if I’d had the chance. Under that kind of pressure, I could really have messed things up. It was better not to dwell on it.

  ‘So why now?’

  ‘Because I’m going to wish for knowledge. If I phrase it properly, it won’t screw things up.’

  ‘Tegs,’ Speck said seriously, ‘if you wish to know who wants you dead, you might end up with a long list of people. It’ll drive you insane.’

  Brochan nodded in agreement. ‘Any time anyone’s thought they’d like to kill you might count. You’ll never trust anyone again.’

  I tilted my head. ‘Are you three saying that you’ve thought in the past that you wanted to kill me?’

  Lexie wouldn’t quite meet my eyes. ‘Not seriously.’

  ‘Yeah,’ Speck added, ‘not like we’d actually kill you. Just more the fleeting thought that we’d like to rip your head off and flay your skin.’

  ‘I thought you liked me!’

  Brochan tutted. ‘We do like you. We love you. But sometimes…’

  ‘Sometimes what?’

  Speck shifted his weight. ‘Those jokes are really annoying.’ He looked relieved to have said it.

  ‘Yeah,’ Lexie bobbed her head. ‘They’re so cheesy.’

  ‘And you tell them all the time,’ Brochan added.

  I looked at him. ‘You too? You feel this way?’

  He shrugged. ‘The thought might have crossed my mind once or twice. It’s not any different to the way I’ve wanted to kill Lexie for singing all the time.’

  She glared at him.

  ‘I can’t believe this,’ I said, shaking my head. ‘You could have mentioned before that you didn’t like my jokes.’

  ‘Would you have stopped telling them?’ Speck asked hopefully.

  I frowned. ‘Don’t be silly. I’d have told more so that you could get a wider range of them. What do you call it when you tell a joke in the shower?’

  Speck stared at Brochan. ‘Please make her stop.’

  ‘A clean joke!’

  Lexie groaned. ‘That’s the worst one I’ve heard in a long time.’

  ‘Oh yeah?’ I said, putting my hands on my hips. ‘Well, expect a lot more from now on, darling.’

  Bob coughed. ‘Helloooo? I’m still here, you know.’

  I turned round. ‘Bob,’ I began.

  ‘Tegs, don’t.’

  I held up my finger. ‘I’ve got this.’

  Bob smacked his palms together in glee. ‘Yes, Uh Integrity? I think I’m going to cream my pants in anticipation.’

  Speck winced. ‘Don’t. Just … don’t.’

  ‘I wish…’ Brochan interrupted with three loud successive sneezes. Speck and Lexie jumped nervously but I stayed on track. ‘I wish to know who’s responsible for trying to kill me with the stoor worm and the fireballs.’ I smiled to myself. As wishes went, that was pretty much perfect. I’d kept things as simple and specific as possible.


  Bob beamed. He snapped his fingers. ‘Uh Integrity, your wish is granted.’

  There was a strange buzzing in the air. My muscles felt tight and tingly, then it was like I was being pulled. Pulled very painfully. Oh shite. ‘No!’ I yelled as I realised what was happening. ‘I want to know! Not see! Bob!’

  He shook his head sadly, ‘Sorry Uh Integrity. The wishes do what the wishes want to do.’

  I braced myself. As cool as teleportation was, this could be very, very bad. With one final sharp tug on every molecule in my body, my vision went blurry. My stomach lurched and, for a brief second, I was convinced I was going to throw up. Blinking hard to keep as much control of my senses as possible, I clenched my fists. At least I’d know what it felt like to be teleported before I ended up in a bodybag, I thought dully.

  When my eyes focused and I saw the stunned face of the Bull staring at me, I groaned. I might have known.

  ‘You … you…’ he stammered. ‘Your gift is teleportation?’

  I squashed down my terror and smiled nastily. It was time to lie for my life. ‘One of them. I have several. I am Clan Adair, after all.’

  The Bull swallowed. All I could think was ‘oh shite’.

  Chapter Seventeen

  It took the Bull less time to recover from my sudden appearance than I anticipated. He flung back his head and roared. It was a deafening sound. If his intention was to scare me, it worked. When his eyes fell on a point beyond my shoulder, however, I realised he’d done it for a different reason. Behind me was a door. He was calling for back up.

  Assuming that he had Clan members close by, I wasted no time. To the right there was an oak table. It wasn’t huge but it might buy me some time. I grabbed the edge of it and tipped it so it fell heavily against the door. For good measure, I also gave the lock a hefty kick, splintering it to help jam it. It was a move Taylor had me practise for weeks on end until I’d got it right – goodness knows how many doors we’d gone through. He’d insisted that it was important in case I ever found myself cornered during a heist and needed some breathing space to work out an escape route. At the time, I’d stubbornly declared that I’d never approach a job without having numerous escape routes and I’d never be stupid enough to let myself get cornered. Now I was seriously grateful for that training.

  Unfortunately my preoccupation with the door gave the Bull time to attack. He came at me from behind, swinging a heavy sword. I heard the whisper as it flew through the air and just managed to duck in time, leaping away a heartbeat afterwards. He didn’t manage to hit me but there was an odd buzzing in my ear that didn’t sound right. I shook my head in a bid to clear it and focused on the Bull.

  ‘Now that’s a weapon,’ I said. I showed him my bare palms. ‘I’m not here to fight though. In fact, I’m a pacifist. I don’t do violence.’

  ‘Oh yeah?’ he sneered. ‘Then what’s that in your pocket?’

  Rather than take my eyes off him, I raised one hand to check. It was Bob’s sodding letter opener. No doubt he’d come along for the ride in the hope that the mess created by my first wish would make me ask for a second.

  ‘This is a letter opener,’ I told the Bull. Screw Bob’s delicate ego. ‘It’s not much good for anything. I keep it handy for urgent letters. I’d forgotten I had it.’

  There were several shouts from the other side of the door, followed by a series of loud thumps. The Bull bared his teeth. ‘You’ve got about five minutes before you’re surrounded. Whatever you’re going to do, you’d better do it fast,’ he said.

  He swung the sword again, his muscles straining. Sadly for him, he’d clearly fallen out of shape over the last twenty years and those muscles were encased in far too much fat. He’d made the classic error of using a weapon that was too unwieldy for him to manage. It was easy to avoid his blow and scoot to the other side of the room.

  I pursed my lips. He’d kept me at such an arm’s length when I was a kid that I’d never known what his Gift was. Judging by the fact that he was obviously biding his time until his Clan came to rescue him, I bet it was something fairly useless. Of course, that knowledge would only help me until his goons arrived.

  ‘You didn’t do the actual conjuring, did you?’ If he possessed that kind of Gift, he’d already have used it here.

  ‘Unlike you, I have a loyal Clan bursting at the seams with talented people. They did what I asked.’

  I felt a slight twinge. It’d be handy to have people around who jumped to your every demand, even if it was attempted murder. ‘Why are you trying to kill me?’

  ‘You know why.’

  Er, no. ‘If I die,’ I said, circling away in case he decided to take another heavy-handed swipe, ‘then you’ll never be able to open the Foinse.’

  His lip curled. ‘The Foinse is already doomed.’

  I blinked. He didn’t even think it was worth trying to kickstart it? ‘You’ll lose all your magic. The Sidhe will lose their standing. Not to mention it might mean hundreds of thousands of deaths.’

  ‘The Scrymgeours are prepared. Any Clan worth its salt is prepared. This has been on the cards for a long time.’

  ‘You’re rich,’ I said quietly. ‘As rich as Croesus. You’re going to make sure that your Clan survives because you can pay for the protection you’ll need.’ There was a flicker of acknowledgment in his dark eyes. ‘You might even be happy,’ I continued. ‘If other Clans are decimated then you’ll rise up even further in the ranks.’

  ‘You have no idea what it’s like,’ he hissed. ‘I’ve got bodyguards outside my door because you can never be sure what the others are going to do. You think I was a bastard to you? Well, think again. I’m nothing compared to some of these bloodthirsty pricks.’

  I had the odd sensation that he was telling the truth. Or at least that he believed what he was saying. ‘I don’t see your bodyguards right now,’ I pointed out.

  ‘They’ll be here. Do your worst, Adair.’

  I just kept circling. Even if had the skills or the desire, getting into a fight wouldn’t help me. I had to be smarter. If I could keep him talking, perhaps I’d find a weak spot. ‘That’s why you could fling those fireballs at the grove,’ I realised. ‘If the Clans are doomed then it doesn’t matter if the sacred ground is destroyed too.’

  His face twisted. ‘I don’t need the other Clans on my back right now. You were going to be alone. I didn’t want anyone to get hurt.’

  I lifted an eyebrow. ‘Other than me. Why do you hate me? Even as a child, you hated me.’

  ‘Black,’ he spat.

  ‘Come again?’

  ‘Your aura is black. It always has been. Even when you were a babe in arms, it was black.’

  ‘That’s your gift,’ I breathed. Wow. That was pretty impressive. You’d know as much about your enemy as they did about themselves. Another wave of nausea hit me but I swallowed it down. ‘You read auras. What does black mean?’

  He shifted his grip on the sword. Even from here, I could tell that his palms were sweaty. He was as likely to drop it on the ground as he was to strike me with it. ‘Evil. It has to be. No-one else has an aura like yours. I see greens, blues, reds. Every hue under the sun. You’re the only person, Sidhe or troll or damned kookaburra, who’s got black. No wonder you hang around with the dirty Clan-less.’

  I was taken aback by the venom in his voice. Was that why I’d been treated so badly when I was his ward? Because everyone thought I was evil? I didn’t feel evil. I was a thief, sure; I wasn’t always on the right side of the law. But pure, unadulterated evil? I was confident that if my soul truly was like that, then I’d know it. Hell, I’d probably revel in it. That’s what evil people did.

  ‘Your father was evil,’ the Bull spat. ‘And you’re evil.’

  ‘I thought you said I was the only person you’d ever seen with a black aura?’

  ‘His was close enough. Dark grey.’

  ‘Have you seen a lot of those?’ I was genuinely curious.

  ‘What are you trying to d
o? Are you going to kill me or talk me to death?’

  ‘I could tell you a few jokes,’ I suggested.

  He stared at me as if I were insane. Right now, he probably wasn’t far off the mark. I was trapped in a room with the man who’d caused virtually every nightmare I’d ever had, and half his Clan were trying to break down the door. If anything was likely to make me crazy, then this would be it.

  The continued banging on the door finally had some effect. Whoever was on the other side had kicked hard enough to make some headway. Now there was little more than the table between me and several vicious Scrymgeour goons.

  Panicking, I pulled out the letter opener and sprang towards the Bull. He was three times my size – it was no wonder how he’d earned his name. If I could put the blade to his throat, however, the rest of his Clan might back off. It was unlikely but I was desperate.

  ‘You think that’s going to work?’ he sneered.

  No, not really. I kicked upwards, knocking the sword out of his hands. It fell to the ground with a clatter.

  ‘You made a mistake coming here, girlie. It’s a shame you won’t live long enough to regret it.’

  ‘Believe me,’ I grunted, shoving the letter opener towards his throat and grabbing him from behind, ‘I’d rather be falling out of the sky than here with you.’

  The door burst open and a number of grim-faced Sidhe piled in, a few of whom I recognised. Before I could say so much as boo, however, my body was yanked backwards.

  ‘Teleporta…’ the Bull started to yell. Except his shout was swallowed up in the billowing wind. We were no longer in his quarters. Sodding hell: we were falling through the sky.

  My stomach lurched. Bob. I kept my grip on the Bull but I was losing control of my body. We twisted and tumbled through the air. The ground seemed a long way down. As I spun one way, I could just make out the dot of the castle below. It might look far away but it wouldn’t take us very long to go splat.

  ‘What the hell have you done?’ the Bull yelled. Instead of pulling away from me, his hands frantically scrabbled forward, latching onto my shoulders. ‘Get us out of here!’