Chapter twenty
Waltz
“Miss?” Kalli looked up to see a sheepish looking boy. She almost laughed out loud. It was Tyler. He dressed up nice.
“Hey, didn’t expect to see you here. It doesn’t really seem like your scene.”
“It’s not. But may I have this dance?” He gave her a half smile.
Kalli thought. “I suppose, but fair warning, I am not very good. I just learned a few days ago,” he smiled and his teeth lit up his fair face. His green eyes were electric against his dark brown hair. He held out his hand and they began dancing. “It’s nice that there is someone here I can talk to.”
“Same here. I’ve been feeling a little lost. A little out of place, you know?”
“Yeah, I definitely know the feeling,” he smiled at her. He was short compared to the guys in Data Venia, about 5’11” she would guess. Just thinking about them made Kalli mad though. She was glad for someone she could look into the eyes of without straining her neck and she had never stood close enough to him to have the chance to notice any kind of height difference.
“So,” she said trying to get her mind off the twins, Dragen, and Percy. “What part of the US are you from? I never did ask,” Kalli thought as long as they were trying to get to know each other again she might as well get some new information.
“Wisconsin, you?”
“Cali. L.A.,” she blushed. When people thought of L.A. they thought drugs, alcohol, and sex, but not everyone was like that, certainly not her and not her neighborhood. It's a big city.
“Oh cool. Are you B.F.F.’s with any celebrities?” His laugh was pleasant; low but more warm and comforting than most. It reminded her a little of Percy's.
“Oh. No. No, I’m just a normal college student going to an elite music school in England,” she shrugged and giggled. There was nothing normal about her now that she thought about it.
“Yeah, I wish. As if any of us here are normal. We are all freaks in this hall.”
“I’m not sure ‘freak’ would be the word I would use,” Kalli was slightly offended by his remarks.
“Then what word would you use? If not freak?” He challenged. She started to see his normal attitude. The ‘nothing can touch me’ mentality.
Kalli thought. “Special, or gifted, I suppose would be better,” her father had always told her that she was gifted and that she should share her gift with the world. That’s why he had her apply. That’s what her mother didn’t understand.
“I guess,” he shrugged. “In my hometown I was an outsider because of my so-called gift.” He was bitter and he wore his heart on his sleeve.
“Then why are you here, if you don’t love music? It seems like a lot of work for not being happy.”
“I didn’t have many other places left to go. My dad, he wanted me out of the house. He said I had ‘disgraced the family name with my fiddle,’ so I applied to a few different music academies. I was accepted here, so here I am,” his eyes got swimmy. It was obvious he didn’t like talking about home. “What about you? What’s your story? How does a California girl fall in love with music and end up halfway around the world?”
“I always had a gift for music; it always made sense to me. My,” She started to stutter. “My dad supported me, but he died shortly before I got my acceptance letter.”
“Oh, I’m sorry…”
“Why do people say that?” She snapped. “‘I’m sorry’. It’s like they think his death was their fault. It wasn’t. I don’t want to hear that their sorry for my loss. I just want people to understand what I’m going through and leave me alone!” she realized she was closed to shouting and people were staring at her. “ex…excuse me,” she left Tyler in the middle of the dance floor. She had officially cracked. She ran into the bathroom the tears streaming down her face.
Lupe saw Kalli across the floor from where she was dancing with Masashi. “I’ll be back,” she ran off the floor, knowing where she would be. She walked into the white walled, gold trimmed bathroom. She couldn’t hear anything but she could feel the over-whelming sad aura of the room. It made her want to cry. “Kalli, Kalli honey? What happened?” no answer but she heard a whimper from an unlocked stall; she looked in to see Kalli kneeling to face the door. Her eyes were red and puffy and all her mascara and eyeliner was running wild down her cheeks. Lupe was many things, but she was not good with tears. “I don’t know what to do…I’m no good at this, I’ll go get Percy…”
“No,” she croaked. “No one. Alone. Need alone,” her face was mostly hidden by her hair that had long since been torn at and was now mostly undone.
“Ok,” Lupe left hesitantly; she went back to dancing with Masashi.
“What happened to Kalli?” he asked calmly yet concerned in his own way.
“Not sure. She said she wanted to be alone. She looked horrid, no offense to her. It's understandable. She’s been through a lot lately; I’m surprised it took this long.”
“Yeah I guess that’s true,” he looked around. The twins were dancing with each other; Dragen was sitting in a darker corner observing; Percy was looking around the dance floor with concern. he got up and approached them.
“Where’s Kalli, Lupe?” Percy asked.
“She wants to be alone. Leave her be, Percy,” Masashi said finalizing the conversation. He should have known that wouldn't work here. Percy was persistent.
“Where is she?!” His long thin hands were balled into fists. “Lupe: Tell. Me. Where. She. Is.” He articulated each word, making it a sentence.
“Girls bathroom. Leave her alone Percy. I warn you: she could blow up on you.”
“I don’t care; it wouldn’t be the first time. She needs me. I’m going to be there for her like I promised,” he ran off before they could say another word.
Percy ran--for the first time in his life--straight into the girl’s bathroom. He heard sniffling from the last stall. It was unlocked. He pushed it open to see Kalli on her knees. She didn’t even glance up but she knew it was him. “What are you doing here, Percy?” Her voice was much weaker than she wanted it to be.
“I was concerned. Concerned for you.”
“Well you shouldn’t be. I’m fine.”
“Ok,” he nodded, understanding. “Now, stop lying to me and tell me what happened.”
“Nothing, I’m…I’m just…having a rough night,” he knelt in front of her and lifted her chin.
“This: does not look like nothing to me and it looks a lot worse than a rough night,” he caught her eyes. They were red and vulnerable.
“Percy,” she fell into his chest and hugged him. “Thank you, you’re always there for me,” he hugged her closer.
“You just cry as long as you need. I’m not sure what caused this but if you want I'll beat them up for you,” Kalli laughed.
“There's no one thing. It's been a bad semester,” He nodded and let her calm herself down. “Okay, I’m good,” She said after a couple of minutes. “I can break down later. There’s a party to be a part of.”
“Are you ready to go back to the party? You still owe me a dance. Dibs, remember?” she smiled.
“I don’t think I look appropriate,” She said, thinking twice. “My hair is a mess and I’m sure my makeup is everywhere,” she wiped under her eyes to find her fingers turned out black. “See?”
“I see very well--20-20 vision--and I see before me a beauty beyond compare no matter what her physical appearance be. I see you,” she smiled. He technically didn’t call her beautiful.
“Okay, give me five minutes to freshen up,” she stood and straightened her dress.
“Very well. I should probably get out of the girls bathroom. It’s not socially acceptable for me to be here,” he took her hand and kissed it. “Je t’aime,” he spoke in soft French.
“What does that mean?” She was still clueless. He shrugged and left with a cocky smile on his face.
“Would the upperclassmen members of Data Venia come down to the stage please for the performance,”
a voice came out over the intercom. Kalli watched as the twins, Lupe, Masashi, and Dragen walked towards the front of the hall. Kalli looked at Percy and caught Sasha by the arm.
“What’s going on?”
“Data Venia is performing,” Sasha said.
“Why?”
“It’s what we do, you will see,” he winked. Odd, Kalli thought.
All dancing stopped as Masashi took the microphone. “Hey guys! Welcome to the Music College in the University of the Arts in Cambridge! Weather you were here last year or you are a freshman, it is so exciting to be back isn’t it?” The crowd screamed. For someone who didn’t like people, Masashi knew how to charm the crowd. “So up here we have a select group of yours and mine classmates. We are part of Data Venia, an organization here on campus. We have elected two new members this year, but I’ll get to that in a moment. First we would like to welcome you by performing a song we all wrote for you today,” he bowed as everyone took their places on the stage: Dragen on drums, the twins both took electric guitars, Lupe on keyboard and harmony, and to Kalli’s surprise, Masashi took lead vocals.
“I didn’t know Masashi was a singer,” she said under her breath to Percy who was standing comfortably close.
“He’s amazing. Just wait until you hear him,” Kalli turned her attention to the stage. She saw the silent conversation between the five musicians. With no starting beat they all began to play. Masashi came in a few bars later with the greatest rock vocals Kalli had ever heard; his voice was pure and clear. Her body was taken over by the beat. The twins were doing an awesome guitar duet underneath the complex keyboard chords. Lupe jumped in on harmony vocals, turning it into a love duet. Kalli looked around: a couple of guys were having a dance off and some others were just rocking out. Kalli had never seen anything like it. She looked over to Percy; he was being taken by the music too.
“This is amazing,” she said, slightly out of breath.
“This is what it’s all about, this is why I love music,” he bowed. “May I have this dance?”
“I’m not sure this is a dancing song…unless it’s hip-hop.”
“It has a salsa beat,” he held out his thin fingers for hers. She nodded and he lead a fast paced salsa, making her look like a professional even though she didn’t even know the steps. She felt like a princess in his hands. She liked the feel of his hand on her back and his silver-blue eyes gazing into hers.
The song ended and Masashi spoke. “Would Percy Delano and Kalli Hardford please make their way to the stage to be inducted into Data Venia?”
“What? We have to go on stage?” Percy and Kalli exclaimed together. They sighed but Percy smiled. He dropped his hand that was on her back, but held onto her head that held his. He led her to the stage feeling the warmth of her hand in his. He helped her up and she didn’t flinch away when he stood close. She didn’t enjoy being on a stage in front of hundreds of people, but she felt better having something solid like Percy near to catch her if she fell. Her heart was pounding.
There was a short ‘ceremony’ inducting the two new members. Lupe as the eldest member swore them in. They had to swear they would do their best to bring excellence to the music community. Everyone clapped then the music began again and the dancing continued. The twins swept Kalli off the stage. She felt like a doll as they switched off dancing with her. Dragen easily interjected, sweeping her across the floor.
Finally when everyone had had their dance, Percy stepped in. “May I have this dance, mademoiselle?”
“I am so very pleased you asked,” Letting out a sigh of relief she took his familiar arm. “You are the first of my friends to actually ask before sweeping me off my feet.”
He smiled. “Well I am a French gentleman to be sure,” they began dancing. It was a slow song and they stood close. It reminded Kalli of a Taylor Swift song.
“So, before, in the bathroom. You said something in French.”
“Indeed I did,” he smiled but his eyes were guarded. Unnaturally so. He was normally very open.
“What did it mean? Can you translate for me? I know you have said it before.”
He shook his shaggy black head. “I’m afraid I cannot do that miss, for my own sake and yours,” he had meant what he told her. In the bathroom she was so--and he had meant it when he said je t’aime, I love you, the English translation. He had meant it and he still meant it, but to tell her…would be sure to tick her off.
“Why not? Did you call me something bad?”
He smiled and shook his head again.
“I took a year of French last year. I know je means, so I will figure out what t’aime means! And you can count on that,” her face was determined, but his was soft.
He leaned in close and whispered in her ear. “If you can figure it out you deserve to know. Just know this: je t’aime,” the song ended and he bowed to her and left her wondering why he was acting so peculiar.
Percy looked forward to the day she put two and two together.
“Some party, huh Dragen?” The night air was clear; Dragen was walking Kalli ‘home’ to the dorm.
“It was…very eccentric,” Kalli giggled. She could tell that he--like she--hated social gatherings. He was a background person. He had spent the entire dance, (except the one dance he shared with her) sitting alone in the darkest corner of the bright ballroom.
“Ha-ha, I agree with you there. I don’t quite understand why people enjoy getting into large groups and running a-muck,” he smiled one of his rare smiles. She understood him. The last person to understand who he really was, was his father. But Kalli wasn’t his father. She was kind and thoughtful, yet she remained strong. She was the exact opposite of his father who was mean, thoughtless, and weak under pressure. Which had led him to his doom, technically he was still alive because he still had beats running through his stone heart, but to Dragen he was long past dead. He was a rotting corpse in his eyes; his father was gone and was replaced by a heartless man with no feeling towards anyone but himself. He vowed to himself he would never become a man like his father was. He would stop the weakness in the bloodline. “Dragen? Dragen you look like someone’s torturing you, what’s wrong? Did I say something?” He heard Kalli’s concerned words break through his thoughts like an ax through wood.
“My apologies, what?” his head cleared like fog next to a flame.
“You got lost in your thoughts for a moment there. You looked like you were going through immense pain. What’s wrong?” Her pale face was filled with concern and anxiety. He wanted to comfort her and console her but he wasn’t sure how. So he just spoke.
“I am alright. You needn’t worry. I was just thinking of my father and home.”
“The father you lost? You told me once, but you never told me the story,” her words were calm and logical, yet filled with emotion. She had an odd gift like that. It made people listen to her; listen to reason and compassion.
“I know. I am surprised you remember. It was such a small statement,” he remembered everything he had ever told her and everything she had ever told him. Everything was important when it came to her.
“Just because it had few words did not make it a small statement. One thing about you, Dragen, is because you speak so little--when you do--people listen because they know you have something important to say. You don’t make small talk. I like that about you.”
“You really feel that way? Most people find me distant and detached,” he couldn’t count how many people had told him he was unreachable.
“I don’t find you detached. On the contrary, you make me feel like you're actually interested in every word I say. I find you guarded sometimes. You are distant when you are thinking hard on something, but everyone does that. I think people are just uneasy with the fact you don’t talk much. People for the most part make silence awkward and I personally have never minded the quiet. So you are perfect in that way. You don’t feel the need to fill every quiet with needless chatter,” he smiled brightly; his smiles were rare but sp
ecial in the fact that they were like a full moon on a starless night. His smile warmed Kalli’s heart as they entered the cool dorm building. They rode the elevator in blissful silence. “I suppose this is where we part ways,” Kalli said somewhat sad that the somewhat dreadful night was over.
Dragen nodded and kissed her hand. “Goodnight,” he said and turned to leave.
“Dragen!” he turned and Kalli ran to him and threw her arms around his neck. Dragen froze. This was odd to him, but he hugged her closer. “Goodnight, Dragen,” she whispered in his ear before disappearing into her dorm.
“Goodnight, beautiful,” he said to the empty air in front of him. He walked on his own back to his single dorm. He had lucked out this year and didn’t have a roommate. He lay on top of his covers and day dreamed about her. She was so wonderful. He loved the way her face redden when he kissed her small breakable but strong hand; the way her hair fell around her face when she looked down to smile. His day dreams became his dreams, she had implanted her face into his sub-conscious, and oddly enough, he liked it there.
Percy drew in his sketchbook as he thought about the evenings events. He found drawing to be a good way to get out his thoughts without making it obvious. Kalli was the first person other than his mom who understood what his father had put him through. She really brought out the best, and the worst, in him. He liked that she was easy to talk to; he wanted to open up to her. Her presence was warm and comforting, he felt free around her.
He jumped slightly when he heard the dorm door open. Masashi must be back. When his face was revealed he was grinning wildly which looked abnormal on him, “I’ll take that as mission success and done?”
“I do believe you mean ‘mission accomplished,” Percy was still getting used to the modern English sayings. He had known English for a while but he didn’t use it often until he came to the university.
“Yeah, whatever. Spill dude. What went down?” Percy sat down his pencil. His drawing and imagination could wait. Masashi needed his full attention.
“I just walked Lupe home and kissed her goodnight.”
“That’s it? You’re glowing.”
“Yeah. Kalli was there. I didn’t want to be rude.” Masashi said. Percy relaxed at the name.
“That’s right, they’re roommates.” He looked down at his drawing; he definitely saw the traces of her in it.
“So anyway,” Masashi continued ignoring his odd reaction. “It was nice,” Masashi’s cheeks reddened remembering the feel of her lips. “At least until Kalli interrupted us.”
Percy’s head popped up, “Really? Kalli caught you?” Percy tried to compose himself; he knew he was acting odd.
“Man, you got the sickness bad,” Masashi picked up on Percy’s blushing face.
“What? What do you mean?” Percy continued his drawing trying to hide his reddening pale skin under his black hair.
“You are head over heels for the brown-haired American.”
“Her name is Kalli,” Percy said just a little too defensively.
“Exhibit A.” Masashi said pointedly.
“What?”
“Right there!” Masashi was now right in front of Percy pointing at his face but Percy knocked his hand aside.
“I don’t know what you are trying to get at. But obviously you are mistaken.”
“No, you and I both know exactly what I’m ‘getting at’ and we both know I’m right on target.”
“Whatever. You’re such a girl. Look, it’s late. I’m tired. Not all of us had an adrenaline pumped evening. So can we please postpone this riveting conversation to the morning?”
“Yeah. Sure, avoid the problem rather than face it head on like a man.”
“Yup, that’s me, ‘the cowardly girl’. Goodnight,” Percy clicked off the light but he had to wonder in the back of his head-- was Masashi right? Honestly, he didn’t know.
Percy stared at the white ceiling and allowed his mind to wander. He quickly discovered that he worried far too much for it to be healthy. Because of Data Venia, the expectations were mounting on him. "Uhh! I don't even know anymore!" he shouted even though there was no one around to hear. That was probably a good thing.
He laid there for a while before he decided to draw. His drawings had been more meaningful lately--with underlying themes and motives--most of which have been about three things: Music, home...and Kalli. He couldn't stop thinking about her; he couldn't see to get her out of his mind. Her face, her hair, her scent. Everything was Kalli. He felt hopeless to stop it. Her happiness was fuel for his and her pain was intensified in him. Every nerve ending shot out of his skin when she hugged him or tapped his shoulder. To his great surprise, he came to only one conclusion: he was head over heels for Kalli…again. And there was nothing he could do--or wanted to do--to change that. But he knew it was hopeless. She wasn’t willing to let anyone in; he had fought that since he crashed into her at the airport. There was no changing her nature. She was a wildfire ignited in his body. She would spread quickly and completely. His only hope was the flame would die down. There was only question: what would be left of him when she was done? Nothing. So did he suppress the flame and destroy himself or did he feed the fire and run the risk of getting burned?
“Lupe, wait.”
“Why should I, Masashi? Honestly, tell me. Why? No wait, don’t; I don’t want to listen to your ‘logic’ right now,” She had let him off easy during the dance, but she still felt the need to stick up for Kalli about the guys Masashi stuck on her.
“Lupe I said I was sorry. You know I didn’t mean for it to go the way it did. Lupe you have to believe me,” he grabbed her hand to stop her, but she yanked it away and kept walking quickly.
“Because you’re such a swell guy and couldn’t leave well enough alone? Yeah like I believe that, Masashi. I told you things wouldn’t work…”
“And they didn’t. You were right,” He had fought enough with her to know not to try to prove his side of things.
“Thank you, but it would have been a lot better if you had kept your trap shut and your nose out of it!” she turned to face him, about to tell him how dumb he was, but the look on his face stopped her dead in her tracks. He was looking down and his overgrown hair was covering his face. She could tell those were tears in his eyes. He was slouching; she knew he hated fighting; it brought back memories of his childhood. He had told her once that his cousin, sister, and he were the only survivors of his family. The bomb had killed everyone else. They had only survived because they left the house because everyone was fighting. “I’m sorry honey.”
“No, you’re right. I was being stupid. I should have stayed out of it,” Lupe had no idea what to say. There was nothing else to say. “I’m the one who’s sorry, baby. Forgive me?”
“Do you realize how impossible it is to stay angry with you for any period of time?” he smiled and nodded. “I’ll let you off the hook this time, but please don’t do it again,” her voice was severe and despite the incredible height difference, Masashi was vaguely terrified of this side of Lupe.
“I swear on my mother’s grave that I will not do that again,” he swore solemnly in meaningful Japanese. He had taught Lupe a lot of Japanese last year so she got the concept and nodded. “Hug?” he asked. She hugged him quickly. He made her feel whole again. He was a strong stationary pole in her crazy world. Always the same, reliable, strong Masashi.
“Well congratulations, Thomas. That was absolutely nauseating.” Luke Stephens said once they were off campus. A drink was in order. Luke had paid his debt after losing a bet by chaperoning the dance.
“Isn’t talent just awful?”
“It is. Especially when displayed in such a distasteful manner. Honestly, the university isn’t a club.” He had watched the Data Venia performance with disgust.
“They were just having some fun. It’s tradition.”
“Well it’s a stupid tradition.”
“You’re just going to nay-say anything to do with that group until the
y are choked of all their passion, aren’t you?”
“I don’t mean to nay-say…”
“Well it’s exactly what you’re doing and quite frankly it’s obnoxious. Luke, you are my best friend, but my kids are the world to me and you either support that or stay on your side of the school. Here,” He handed him a wad of bills. “Have a couple on me.” Thomas left him alone in the street.
***