Because for no earthly explanation, Moe had truly changed.
His apology that afternoon had stayed with him, and now it seemed he looked for ways to help her. He talked to her about her growing energy and her fears about whether her body would reject the heart. Sometimes he simply sat beside her and listened to her. The change was so great, so unexplained, that Kendra could only attribute it to one thing: the prayer she’d uttered that hopeless day a week earlier. Every day since then Kendra had pondered the other reality. There could be only one reason why her prayer had worked. A possibility Kendra hadn’t fully grasped—even though she thought about it constantly.
The possibility that not only was Christmas the most wonderful time of the year.
It might also be true.
As true as the God who—just maybe—really did love His people enough to come to earth that first Christmas morning.
Even for an atheist like Kendra Bryant.
CHAPTER TEN
Connor had prayed for a Christmas miracle for Maddie every day since they met. But instead of seeing her grow happier and more sure of her faith as Christmas approached, Connor watched her slip a little further away. Now it was the Sunday before Christmas, the day of their show, and Maddie almost seemed like a stranger.
They gathered in the auditorium two hours before doors opened to run through the performance a final time. Maddie was onstage, helping the littlest children remember their places.
In the empty seating area, Connor took the spot next to Bailey and for a long moment he said nothing. Just watched her. Maddie had a beautifully tender way with the children—especially the littlest ones. Those who needed extra help.
The truth Connor couldn’t escape was this: Maddie took his breath away more now than when they first met. And that night in the parking lot when he had prayed for her, Connor had hoped they still had a chance. But whatever had changed between them, Maddie was not interested. Not at all. Not even in being friends.
“What happened between you two?” Bailey looked pale as she glanced at him. She’d been chewing organic ginger candy all morning. She said it helped her nausea. “Maddie seemed so friendly at first.”
“Maybe you could ask her.” Connor was out of options. “I’ve tried talking to her and praying for her. She told me she was asking God for a Christmas miracle this year. She’s pretty much avoiding me now. Like I’ve personally done something to upset her.”
“No.” Bailey watched Maddie, laughing with three of the little girls onstage. “She’s not upset. That’s not it. She’s distant.”
“Exactly.” Connor sighed.
“Mostly with you.” Bailey turned to him. “Maybe I’ll talk to her.”
“I wish you would. After the show, we’ll probably never see each other again.”
Bailey patted Connor’s knee. “That’s not true. She lives here. You’re bound to run into her.”
“I never ran into her before.”
Bailey smiled at him. “You have her number now. That should make a difference.”
“I guess.” Connor thought about that. Even a year from now he could text her randomly to see how she was doing. Maybe they could catch up and she’d be friendlier. The way she was the first time they met.
Bailey stood and made her way up onto the stage next to Brandon. Connor could see she wasn’t feeling well. But he knew this was Bailey’s favorite day of all. Opening night. The approaching showtime seemed to bring a rush of energy—not just to her, but to all of them.
Connor followed her up onto the stage and took his place near Maddie. He leaned close to her. “They’re going to do great.”
“I can’t believe how far they’ve come.” She smiled, but her eyes never quite met his.
Up front, Brandon had a quick conversation with Bailey. Then he turned to the group. “Okay, now who remembers the message of our show today?”
Several of the kids raised their hands. Brandon pointed to one little boy. “RJ?”
“Don’t pick a bad Christmas tree!”
A few of the kids snickered. Connor met Brandon’s and Bailey’s eyes, the three of them working hard to keep straight faces. Brandon took a step closer to the group. “It’s something more than that. Who else wants to tell us?”
More hands filled the air. Bailey pointed to a little girl in the front row. “Janessa?”
The girl was only four. One of the youngest in the show. She was the daughter of Ashley Baxter Blake—a local artist who designed sets for most of the CKT shows, including this one. Connor remembered her. Their families got together every year or so.
Janessa smoothed the wrinkles from her dress and straightened herself. “For unto you is born this day a Savior . . . which is Christ, the Lord.”
Bailey’s eyes filled with tears, and Connor watched her and Brandon exchange a look. Connor understood. This would be them soon, parents of a precious child like Janessa. Bailey nodded, taking a moment, probably, to find her voice. “Yes, Janessa. That’s exactly right. A Charlie Brown Christmas is about Jesus being born for all of us.”
“Okay.” Brandon put his arm around Bailey. “Let’s run the show once more from the top.”
Connor and Maddie stayed at the back of the group, helping children remember their cues and whether to walk off stage right or left when their numbers were finished. Again, Maddie was friendly but distant. Once, when their arms brushed against each other, Maddie practically jerked away. “Sorry.”
“It’s okay.” Connor made a point to give her more space. Whatever was wrong, she wanted nothing to do with him. When the auditorium doors opened—thirty minutes before the show started—Connor found her backstage getting water.
“Hey.” She opened a bottle and took a long sip.
“Maddie . . . did I do something to upset you?” Connor uttered a laugh, but it held no humor whatsoever. “I keep thinking back to the first few times we hung out, that time over coffee. I get you don’t want to date. But now . . . it’s like you don’t want to be friends, either. What’s going on?”
“Nothing. Really.” Her answer was quick. “I need to help the girls in the first number.”
She got a text at the same time, checked her phone and hurried off. Whatever was happening in Maddie’s heart, Connor was convinced she wasn’t being quite honest. Because as she turned away a single tear fell on her cheek. Connor watched her go and lifted his eyes to the theater rafters. Help me here, Lord . . . I’m at a loss. Completely.
There was no loud answer, no booming voice to tell him what to do. So Connor did what he needed to. He moved to his group of young actors and reminded them once more what to do when they got onstage.
This was why he was here—to help the kids. Tomorrow the show would be over and he would do what he obviously had to do next.
Put Maddie West behind him.
Maddie received the text from her mother as soon as the theater doors opened. Her parents and Hayley were picking up their tickets from the will call window. Come find us, her mother’s second text read. Hayley has someone she wants you to meet.
Maddie stared at the text a moment longer. Someone Hayley wanted her to meet? Maddie hurried through the side door into the seating area and scanned the room for her family. Almost at the same time she spotted her mom and dad. Already the theater was crowded, so it was impossible to see Hayley and whoever Maddie was supposed to meet.
She moved through the crowd to the back right side of the auditorium, where her family was seated. Then, four rows from reaching them, Maddie felt her breath catch in her throat.
Hayley was sitting next to a boy her age.
For a few seconds, Maddie stopped and stared. Hayley’s blond hair was curled and she wore a pretty red sweater and new dark jeans. Maddie continued pressing her way past the milling crowd and as she got closer she could hear her sister’s happy voice. And Maddie could see something else.
Her sister was wearing makeup.
Not too much, but just enough that one thing was very c
lear. Hayley had a crush on the boy sitting next to her. Maddie reached her mother first and hugged her. When their faces were close, Maddie whispered, “What in the world?”
Her mom didn’t answer. Instead, she motioned to Hayley and the boy. “This is Patrick. He’s a friend from Hayley’s class.” She paused. “This is Hayley’s sister, Maddie.”
Immediately Patrick was on his feet. “Hello.” He held out his hand. “Nice to meet you. Hayley says you’re her best friend in the whole world.”
“Yes.” Maddie fought to keep herself from bursting into tears. “She’s . . . she’s my best friend, too.”
“See?” Hayley giggled as she stood and hugged Maddie. Then in a voice not quite soft enough, she said, “Isn’t he cute?”
Maddie nodded. “Yes.” She smiled at Patrick and then at Hayley. “He’s very nice.”
“Hi, Maddie.” Her dad stood then and kissed her cheek. “We’re excited about the show. You all have worked so hard.”
“Yes.” Maddie felt dizzy from this revelation about Hayley. She forced a smile in her mother’s direction. “Could you talk to me for a minute in the lobby?”
“Of course.” Her mom motioned to the others. “I’ll be right back.”
When they were far enough away not to be heard, Maddie put her hands on her hips and paced one way and then the other. “Mom! You let Hayley bring a boy?”
“Of course.” Peace shone from her mother’s eyes. “They like each other. Why not bring him?”
“They like each other?” Maddie felt like she’d fallen into some unthinkable dream. “Are you serious? Hayley can’t . . . She’s . . .”
“She’s what?” Her mom’s expression grew deeper. “Do you think Hayley won’t fall in love someday, Maddie?”
“No. I thought . . .” People were streaming past them, finding their seats. Maddie was careful to keep her tone from sounding too shocked. “I thought she would never have . . . what other people have.”
Her mom looked back at their row of seats and then once more at Maddie. “Patrick suffered a brain injury at birth. He has strength where Maddie has weaknesses. And vice versa.” Her smile seemed as much for herself as for Hayley. “They’ve been friends for several weeks now.”
And Maddie had missed it. She’d been so caught up in punishing herself that more than a month had passed since she’d really talked to Hayley. Since she’d listened to how her sister was doing or whether she had made any new friends. Or whether she had a crush on a tall, handsome boy named Patrick.
“We can talk more later.” Her mother kissed her forehead. “For now . . . just be happy for your sister.”
“I will be.” Maddie blinked back tears. “I am.” She had to get backstage before the show started. She waved at her dad and Hayley and Patrick as she hurried down the aisle, through the door, and backstage with the others.
Connor Flanigan was one of the first people she spotted. And though they each had work to do, she went to him and took brief hold of his hand. “I’m sorry,” she whispered near his face. “I have to talk to you. After the show. If you have time.”
He searched her eyes, clearly confused. “Okay. I can do that.”
She smiled. “Good.”
And with that, the houselights went dark and the music began.
Maddie worked one side of the stage wings, while Connor worked the other. Between numbers, her eyes connected with his several times. How could she have treated him so badly? He was praying for her to have a Christmas miracle, and now God had given her one.
Hayley liked a boy!
The very thing Maddie expected would never be possible was happening. And if her mother’s reaction was any indication, this was only the beginning for Hayley. One day she might actually fall in love and get married. Something Maddie had never thought could happen.
But along the way, she had taken her guilt and shame out on Connor. The more she was around him, the more she liked him. And the more guilty she felt because she had promised herself she would avoid falling in love. At all costs.
For Hayley.
The third number was wrapping up and Maddie watched Connor motion for a group of kids to exit the stage in his direction. So far they had no major mess-ups, nothing but the most adorable show. Everything was turning out to be exactly what they had worked so hard for.
Maddie’s eyes met Connor’s again. He smiled, like last time. But his confusion was clear all the way across the stage. Even once she tried to explain herself to him, she wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t want to see her again. She had shut him out completely. Even when he took the time to ask her if he’d done anything wrong. After this he would probably lose all interest in her.
The audience was clapping wildly over a song by three of the littlest girls—including Maddie’s cousin Janessa. Out in the audience, Maddie spotted her aunt Ashley and uncle Landon as they cheered for their daughter. And between them another one of Maddie’s cousins—Amy Hogan—raised both her hands, clearly thrilled for Janessa’s performance.
Amy’s parents should be here, God. Maddie closed her eyes for a quick moment. Chloe and Heidi Jo would’ve probably been on the stage right next to Janessa. When the number ended Maddie blinked her eyes open, and motioned for the girls to exit toward her.
“You did so good!” Maddie whispered to the cousins, hugging each of them. She watched them bounce and link arms and celebrate the success of their song. As they walked away, a thought hit Maddie. The losses in the Baxter family were many, but maybe God really was still with them.
Otherwise how could she explain a day like this?
Not until the show was over did Maddie realize Connor was gone. She got a text from him while she was cleaning up with a crew of parents and older kids.
Sorry! Bailey wasn’t feeling good, so I took her home. I guess we’ll have to talk some other time.
Maddie read the text and felt the disappointment deep within her. Her fingers flew across the phone’s keyboard. No problem. Maybe we can get together after Christmas. I still want to talk.
His next text took a few minutes. Sure. Sounds good. Great job tonight.
She had hoped he would ask her to meet sooner. Tomorrow or the next day. But she understood. After how she’d acted, Maddie could hardly blame him. She typed out her final text. Thanks. You too. Then she slipped her phone into her purse and set about her work.
The trouble with Connor was all her fault. She could’ve at least explained her situation, helped him understand how she felt about Hayley. Now he was probably glad to have a reason to leave early.
A realization hit Maddie as she drove home, as she thought about the amazing performance by the kids and how she’d lost her chance with Connor Flanigan. Something that brought comfort despite her disappointment. God really had given her the Christmas miracle she had prayed for.
His name was Patrick.
And that was enough. Maddie smiled as she pulled into her neighborhood.
No matter how Christmas turned out for her.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
The worst snowstorm of the year descended on Indiana late in the afternoon the day before Christmas, making John thankful for three things. First, that they had all gone to the four o’clock Christmas Eve service that afternoon at Clear Creek Community Church. Second, that Kendra Bryant had decided to come early. Already she had texted John to say she was in town, doing some last-minute shopping near the university.
And finally, John was thankful that Luke and Reagan and the kids had decided not to come.
In John’s perfect picture of the day, all of his family would be together to meet Kendra. But with the severity of the storm he could only thank God that Luke and Reagan would be safe at home. Already local news was warning people to cancel plans and stay off the interstate.
Ashley helped Elaine with the cooking, even though Ashley and her family weren’t going to stick around for dinner. They had planned to spend Christmas Eve with Landon’s family several hours away. But the storm
changed everything and instead, Landon had made reservations at their favorite nearby steak house.
John found them in the kitchen. He approached Ashley and put his hand on her arm. “You sure about dinner? We could move the party to Brooke’s house so you all could stay here. Brooke’s only a few miles away.”
“Dad, really. We’re fine.” Her eyes held an acceptance that hadn’t been there before. “We told the kids we’ll take them to a movie after dinner. Everyone’s okay with the plan.”
Dinner tonight would be stuffed chicken and roasted vegetables. Ashley was saving the turkey for tomorrow when the entire family would be together. As long as Luke and Reagan could get out from the storm.
When the dinner was ready, Elaine thanked Ashley. “I’ll keep it in the oven till everyone gets here.”
John moved into the kitchen. “I’m sorry again, Ashley.” He took the spot next to Elaine. “We should’ve had it in January.”
“It’s okay.” She hugged him and their eyes held. “Let me know how it goes.”
“I will.”
Ashley went upstairs to get ready. Landon was already up there helping the kids wrap presents.
Christmas music filled the house, but it did nothing to dim the regret in John’s heart. He turned to Elaine. “I’ve been thinking about something.”
She put her hand on the side of his face. “Tell me.”
“The last thing I wanted to do this Christmas was divide everyone.”
“I know.” Her tone was understanding, but it didn’t change the truth.
John stared out the window at the snow-covered garden behind the house. The one he’d planted three decades ago. Wasn’t it yesterday when Erin and her sisters played hide-and-seek in that garden? A sigh slid from John’s heart. “This dinner with Kendra Bryant . . .” John’s eyes found Elaine’s again. “The first time I heard Erin’s heartbeat she was just seconds old. The doctor laid her in my arms.”
“John.”
He nodded. His eyes shifted to the backyard again. “She was our fourth little girl, but she had her own way. A happy, gentle spirit that defined her . . .” He smiled at Elaine. “Till the day she died.”