I could only imagine what my family would be like. I told him I had no brothers or sisters and used my memories of Pamela for a reference.
"She sounds a lot like Gerry's wife," he muttered.
I went around the aisles in the grocery store, locating the things Nana had put on her list. He said I cut his shopping time in half because I could find things easier.
"I oughta adopt you," he quipped on our way out and I almost lost my breath. I looked down quickly so he wouldn't see the expression on my face. I was never as good as Crystal or especially Raven when it came to hiding my feelings and thoughts. Raven always said I might as well have two tiny television screens for eyes because my thoughts get played on them as clearly as any show on TV.
Dinner was wonderful. None of us could recall anything like it, even when we had lived with foster parents. Butterfly declared it felt like Thanksgiving, which made us all laugh. It was hard to describe the feeling of warmth we all experienced, but it was as if Norman and Nana were truly our grandparents, the family we had never known, and one night, just by accident, we had stumbled upon them. We felt as if we had known them all our lives. Our laughter came naturally, our smiles and concern for each other just seemed to flow.
After dinner Butterfly danced again, only this time she danced longer, truly performing better than ever before. Raven sang two songs. She would have sung a third if she were asked. Crystal had written a short poem about nature, about the way it embraces us and makes us feel alive and spiritual.
I kept my eyes on Nana. I couldn't help but be drawn to her. She was so gentle and so beautiful in her way. There was a sincerity of feeling we all had missed most of our lives. When she watched Butterfly, heard Raven and Crystal, her eyes filled with tears of joy. It brought tears to my own.
Norman thanked us all again for helping him out in the yard.
"I oughta hire you all on for the summer," he said with a chuckle.
"I wish you would," Nana said. "I'd love to have you all stay."
"So would I," Butterfly piped up, her longing for home and family so strong she couldn't contain herself.
"But we have to get to my house," Crystal said, her eyes narrowing as she looked at Butterfly, who looked down quickly.
"Of course, you do, dear. Your families will be worried enough as it is and I'm sure your mama and papa are looking forward to seeing you," Nana said. "Well now, I'm a bit tired," she revealed. "You girls can go into the den and watch television, if you like," she added, rising. "We missed all the shows we would watch."
"Oh, I'm sorry," Crystal said.
"No, no, this was better than anything we could have seen on television, wasn't it, Norman?"
"About a million times better," he said, nodding.
"I'll have breakfast on for you girls in the morning," Nana said starting for the door. She did look tired and suddenly, very old.
"No need for that, Nana," I said. "We'll be getting an early start."
"We get up early," she declared. "You don't leave this house without something hot in your stomach, you hear?"
"Yes, ma'am," I said quickly and she smiled. "Good night, girls. Sleep well."
"Good night, Nana," we all chorused.
Norman remained behind a moment.
"I want to thank you for visiting with us," he said. "It's been a joy. Really has," he added and stood up with a groan. He felt his lower back and shook his head, smiling at me. "You got me working harder than I have all month, girls. Could be you're dangerous to have around," he said with a laugh. I smiled at him. "Night, girls."
"Good night," we said.
We heard them both go up the stairs and then we sat back, letting the silence envelop us for a moment. Crystal was the first to speak.
"Maybe we should just leave now, Brooke," she said.
"No," Butterfly moaned.
"It's better to travel at night and it's going to be hard to say good-bye, Butterfly," she pointed out.
"I don't care. It's not a nice thing to do to them, sneak away like that," Butterfly insisted. She looked at me for support.
"Crystal's right about the traveling, but Butterfly's right about what's nice and what isn't," I said.
"I'm just evaluating the situation and giving you my conclusion," Crystal replied.
"Raven?" Butterfly asked, hoping Raven would break the tie.
"I don't feel like riding in that car all night with that soft bed up there waiting for me," Raven concluded. "I'd like to watch some television, too, maybe some MTV and see what's been happening in music. What harm can it do to stay one more night?" she asked.
No one replied because no one could anticipate just what harm daylight could bring.
We watched television, Raven the last to turn it off and come upstairs to bed. I drifted in and out of sleep, tossing and turning with guilt because we had accepted their hospitality under such a cloud of lies. Finally, after Raven crawled into bed, I settled down and fell asleep, too.
We were all awakened by the sound of a gruff voice coming from downstairs. Raven looked at me and I sat up. Crystal came to our room and opened the door quietly.
"Get dressed quickly," she said. "I went to the stairway and listened. It's their son Gerry and he's mad at them for taking us in, four strangers. He's ranting and raving that this proves they need supervision and shouldn't be living on their own here anymore. Nana was crying. I heard her."
"That creep," I said, thinking he sounded just like Gordon.
"Just get dressed. Butterfly's ready. We'll make as fast an exit as we can."
"Right."
Raven and I were out of bed in a flash. We threw on our clothes and washed our faces. In minutes, the four of us were descending the stairway.
Nana and Norman's son Gerry was a big man, probably six feet four and two hundred and twenty pounds. He looked more like Norman, but had Nana's eyes. His light brown hair was trimmed short, making his ears look larger. He was wearing a dark brown sports jacket, a white shirt opened at the collar and a pair of slacks. When we entered the kitchen, he was leaning against the counter, his arms folded across his chest. Norman was at the table, his- head lowered. Nana was keeping busy at the stove, but looked very disturbed.
"Who are you?" Gerry demanded before we could say good morning or be introduced.
"We're just on our way to my house," Crystal said. "I'm Crystal. This is Brooke. This is . . ."
"I don't mean your names," he followed. "What the hell you doing sleeping in our driveway?"
"I told you why," Nana said. "Just sit down girls. Everything's ready."
"Maybe we should just be on our way," I said.
"Maybe you should," Gerry declared, his eyes full of distrust and anger as he shifted them from one of us to the other.
"You have to have something in your stomachs," Nana moaned. She looked on the verge of tears. "Let them eat, Gerry. Please."
"This isn't a hotel," he muttered, but he looked away.
"Sit at the table, girls," Nana said. Norman looked up and smiled.
"Sure, come on," he urged.
Butterfly was the first to take a seat. Raven followed, her eyes on Gerry, and then Crystal and I sat. Nana began to serve us scrambled eggs.
"I don't like my mother being someone's maid," Gerry said.
"I'm not being anyone's maid, Gerry. The girls have helped us a great deal. Didn't Dad tell you how he got the lawn all cut and raked?"
"Urn," Gerry grunted. He watched us eat. It was very uncomfortable, all of us keeping our eyes down, trying to be friendly, trying to make Norman and Nana feel comfortable too.
"Wait a minute," Gerry said suddenly, "where's your bracelet and watch, Mom?"
"What's that?" Nana looked at her wrists. "Oh. I guess I must have left them upstairs."
"Where upstairs?" he demanded, looking at us. "On the dresser where I always leave them, Gerry. Really, I wish . . ."
He didn't hesitate. He left the kitchen quickly and went to the stairs.
"Don't mind him none," Nana said. "He's always suspicious of strangers, always was, even as a little boy, right Norman?"
"Yes, he was."
"And he's worrying about us all the time," she added with a forced smile.
"I would too," I admitted.
We ate a little faster, despite the effort Norman and Nana made to make us feel comfortable again.
Moments later, we heard Gerry's heavy footsteps on the stairs and then saw him fill the doorway. He had a wry smile on his face.
"None of it's there, Mom. I checked your jewelry box, too."
"It's not?" She looked puzzled. "I'm sure I put them there," she said.
He scanned us.
"No one's leaving this house until that watch and bracelet are returned," he announced.
"We didn't take anything," I cried.
"Of course we didn't," Crystal said. "Why are you accusing us?"
"Please, Gerry, these girls . . ."
"You don't know anything about them. There are girls on the loose everywhere these days, running away from home, from jails, becoming little prostitutes."
"That's not who we are," Crystal cried defensively.
"You don't look exactly like Mary Poppins." His face grew stern again "I want that jewelry."
"We didn't take it," I insisted. "We don't steal." He nodded. "Sure you don't."
"Wait a minute," Norman said. "Seems to me I remember you taking them off before you started cooking last night, Nana."
"Yes," she said her eyes growing sharper. "Yes." She turned and then she went to a drawer in the cabinet by the sink and produced the watch and bracelet. "Here they are. I just forgot," she said.
Everyone was silent a moment.
"I think we're owed an apology," Crystal declared, her eyes fixed on Gerry.
"I think you got enough from my parents as it is."
"I wasn't referring to them," Crystal said. "You should apologize, Gerry," Nana said. "Aaa. I don't like it," he said. "I'm leaving for work, Dad. I'll talk to you later." He glared at us.
"I expect you'll be gone when I return."
"We will for sure," I said angrily.
"Good."
He turned and left the house. As soon as the door closed, Nana apologized for him again.
"We've got to get going," Crystal said. "It's all right. I'm glad you found everything."
"It's easy to forget things these days," Nana said mournfully.
"Shouldn't we stay and help with the dishes?" Butterfly asked.
"No, you don't have to do that," Nana said. "I don't have much to do with myself as it is."
They followed us out of the house, once again apologizing for Gerry.
"Maybe on your way back, you can stop in again," Norman said.
I smiled.
Nana hugged Raven and Crystal and then gave Butterfly an especially long hug before hugging me, too. I got into the car and started the engine. Everyone got in afterward and I turned it around and headed toward the driveway entrance. The two of them stood side by side watching us, waving, looking smaller than ever.
"I wish we could have stayed," Butterfly said sadly.
No one spoke.
"I only hope that son of theirs doesn't report us to the police," Crystal remarked.
It was a worry we carried with us for nearly two hours before we felt more comfortable.
It had been a great stopover, I thought, but then when I looked at everyone and saw the sadness in their faces, I thought again. Maybe it would have been better if we'd never met Nana and Norman
Our time with them seemed to confirm what we'd always feared: we'd never have a chance to be loved, to be part of a family. Being orphans had tainted us forever.
6 A Ray of Sunshine
Crystal returned to her maps to find us the safest routes because she was still worrying about Nana and Norman's son Gerry and Gordon's inevitable report to the police.
"Even if Louise talked him out of it for the time being, hoping we would come back, thinking we might have just gone off on a joy ride, he would be furious by now, especially if he followed that false map," she explained. "Let's continue to stay away from heavily traveled highways where policemen patrol more frequently. Turn here," she instructed. "Yes," she said reading her map, "just follow this until I tell you to turn again."
"Can we have a picnic today?" Butterfly asked once we'd been on the road for a while. "It was fun eating in the backyard with Nana and Norman yesterday."
"It looks like it might rain," Raven said, sounding a note of discouragement.
The dark clouds crawling toward us seemed to have already seeped into the car. Raven didn't even notice that I hadn't turned on the radio. She sat staring out the window, watching the scenery go by, looking like someone hypnotized. When I gazed at Crystal and Butterfly in the rearview mirror, I saw they were both pensive, Butterfly looking sadder than ever.
"You want to sing or play riddles?" I asked. No one responded. "Great. You're all a lot of fun. I might as well have stolen a hearse to drive," I said.
"What's that up there?" Raven suddenly said, sitting up.
Maybe a half mile ahead of us, at the side of the road someone was sitting on a suitcase. I slowed as we drew closer.
"It's a hitchhiker," Raven declared. "A girl. Pick her up, Brooke."
"No," Crystal said.
"Why not? She's probably all alone, like us. Who else is going to pick her up? Besides, she might get caught in a rainstorm," Raven fired back at her.
"We can't take chances," Crystal said.
"Some chance, helping someone. Stop for her, Brooke," she pleaded. "We could use the change in company," she added, throwing a look back at Crystal.
"I don't mind," Butterfly said. "It could be fun."
As we drew closer, we could see that the hitchhiker was a young woman, maybe seventeen, eighteen years old. She wore a short skirt the color of light tea, shoe boots with no socks and a tie-dyed tank top. A lime green and white bandanna was wrapped around her peach and blue colored hair and her forehead. The faded brown suitcase upon which she had been sitting looked like it had been tossed out of a speeding train. It was cracked and battered so badly, some of her clothing was actually leaking out. She had tied a rope around it to keep it shut.
"All right. She does look pretty pathetic," I said and stopped.
She wore only one earring that looked like a thin string of leather with a blue marble on the end. Her small framed, dark blue sunglasses hid her eyes. She wore no makeup, but it looked like she had a patch of tiny, blue dots on her left cheek.
The tank top was snug and revealed she was braless, despite her full bosom. She had lean arms with a tattoo of what looked like a sunflower bursting open on her left forearm. Her right hand was covered with metal rings, none looking very expensive. Despite the tattoo, the dots, the strange clothes and appearance, she was a pretty girl. Her nose was perfect and her lips were full and straight with just a tiny dip in the left. corner. When she spoke, a dimple flashed on and off in her right cheek.
"Thanks for stopping," she said breathlessly. "I didn't expect to see anyone on this road for days. Where should I throw this?" she asked, indicating her suitcase.
For a long moment, the four of us just gaped at her.
"Well, are you giving me a ride or not?"
"Oh, open the back door for it," I said and got out. I flipped open the rear door and she put the suitcase in quickly.
"You can sit up front," Raven called out the window and she went around and got in when Raven moved over. I started the engine and drove on.
"Thanks guys," she said, smiling back at Crystal and Butterfly, who continued to stare at her as if she were an extraterrestrial.
"Where are you going?" I asked.
"Anywhere but here. How about you?"
I glanced at Crystal in the rearview mirror. She shook her head slightly.
"To my friend's house in Ohio," I said.
"Great. I'll go to Ohio," she said. The way she
said it, I thought she would agree to go to Alaska if we said we were heading that way.
"What's your name?" Raven asked. She was the most taken with her.
"Sunshine. What's yours?"
"Sunshine?" Raven hesitated as if her own name wouldn't match up in value. "Urn, I'm Raven. This is Brooke," she said nodding at me. "Crystal and Butterfly," Raven said nodding at each.
"Butterfly? Great name. I had a friend who named her daughter Beetle Bug because she was born with these dark eyes so close together she looked like a little bug in the blanket."
"Butterfly is just a nickname," I said. "Her real name is Janet. What's your real name?"
"I told you, Sunshine. I have no other name," she insisted.
"How come you were hitchhiking?" Raven asked.
"Because my darling boyfriend, Sky, left me out there. We broke up."
"Sky?" I said with a smile.
"In his case he had another name, Ormand Boreman. It was on his driver's license. It should be Ormand Boring instead."
"He just left you there?" Crystal asked. Sunshine turned and smiled at her.
"Well actually, I opened the door and said if you don't stop and let me out, I'll jump. So he stopped and I got out there. He drove away with the door still open."
"What kind of boyfriend is that?" Butterfly asked.
"The worst kind," Sunshine said. "Good riddance, huh? Men make me sick anyway. They always think just cuz you're pretty or funny you're up for grabs."
"I know exactly what you mean," Raven said.
Sunshine looked at her, a small smile on her lips. It was obvious that they were kindred souls.
"Who are you guys? Where are you all from?" "Back east in upstate New York," Crystal said quickly, "except for me. I come from Ohio. How about you?"
"I was born in California, but I haven't been back there since . . ."
"Since when?" Crystal asked.
"Since good old Mom and Dad split," she answered.
"Oh, sorry," Crystal said quickly.
"It's all right. There's nothing to be sorry about," she remarked.
"Do you have any brothers or sisters?" Raven asked.
"Probably," Sunshine replied.