"They liked me," Butterfly said, "and I liked them, too. They were nice."
"If they changed their mind, they weren't good for you," I chimed in. "You heard what Crystal said. She's right."
We didn't want to tell her how Louise had sabotaged her chances, Without hope, she could become even more withdrawn than she was. I knew that much because I felt that way myself.
"Besides," I said, winking at Raven, "I have another idea I'm going to bring up soon."
"Don't," Crystal warned.
"Don't worry. I won't talk about it until I have a good plan."
"To do what?" Butterfly asked, now intrigued.
"To . . ."
"Brooke." Crystal widened her eyes and raised her eyebrows like she did when she was angry.
"Just be patient," I told Butterfly. "It's a surprise."
Crystal shook her head.
"False promises can hurt more, Brooke," she warned.
"This won't be false. You'll see," I said.
"I'm with you," Raven declared, turning her black onyx eyes on Crystal.
"Why is it that I'm not surprised to hear that?" Crystal said with a shake of her head.
We went back to finishing our breakfast.
This was the last week of classes. Most of the time now was being spent in review for final exams. There was the usual excitement in the air anticipating the summer break. The older kids at the foster home could apply and get jobs. Companies, retail stores, even professional offices that needed summer help would send a notice over to the house and Louise would post it on the general bulletin board. Those who were interested filled out applications that Louise then forwarded to the businesses. It was part of the state agency structure to appeal for cooperation from area enterprises. To us it sometimes seemed more like charity. The company usually bragged that they were employing foster children. Crystal, Raven and I had worked last summer and still had a little money in our savings accounts. I had plans for that, but it was going to take something more dramatic to convince Crystal and I knew without her, it would be impossible to include Butterfly. Besides, despite her pessimistic attitude and her lectures, I really loved Crystal. I loved all of them and they all loved me.
That Friday night, the last weekend before finals, Louise came up to our rooms before dinner and barged in on Crystal and Butterfly. Raven and I had just started studying when we heard Louise's shouts.
"You know the rules about cigarettes in this house!" Louise was saying to Crystal and Butterfly. "Gordon gets very upset. This building could go up in flames in minutes."
"We don't have any cigarettes," Crystal said. "Neither of us ever smoke. I know what smoking can do to you."
"Of course she doesn't smoke," I said, practically laughing as I stepped up beside Louise. "She would be the last one to have a cigarette in her room. She's always bawling out everyone else. If you really looked at us and saw us for who we are, you'd know that," I said defensively.
"Mind your own business, Brooke, or I'll give you ten demerits." She turned back to Crystal and Butterfly, who was cowering in her chair. I could see she was beginning to hyperventilate. "This is just as unpleasant for me as it is for you," she continued. "I wish you girls hadn't put me in this position, but I am a parent."
"Why are you doing this, Louise? Who told you Crystal and Butterfly were smoking?" I demanded.
"Never mind," she said. "Just go back to your room. Both of you."
Raven started toward her and I grabbed her arm and shook my head.
"Just wait," I said. "She'll realize how wrong she is in a minute."
Suddenly Louise crossed the room, went to Crystal's makeshift bookcase and began pulling the books off the shelf, finally revealing a pack of cigarettes. She held it up with her thumb and forefinger as if it were diseased.
"And what is this, might I ask?"
Crystal shook her head, her eyes wide.
"I don't know how that got there, Louise."
"Maybe it walked in," Louise said. She glared at Butterfly, who was crimson with fear. "This will be twenty demerits. The two of you are confined to your room for the weekend."
"But I have to go to the library tomorrow to use the computer," Crystal wailed.
"Not tomorrow you don't. You two get your meals and come back here. Your names will be posted and your room is off-limits to everyone else," she emphasized, glaring at Raven and me.
"You know that someone else put those there, Louise. Crystal wouldn't have anything to do with cigarettes, and you can't possibly think Butterfly did," I said.
"Did you put them here, Brooke?" she asked, her eyes small, as if she could see right through us to the truth.
"Of course not. None of us smoke, Louise, you've got to believe us."
"I'd advise you and Raven to turn around and return to your room before I give you twenty demerits, too."
I was about to respond when we all heard Gordon come up the stairs.
"What's going on?" he demanded.
"Nothing. It's under control," Louise said quickly. She seemed terrified of him. He glared at Raven and me and then looked at Louise and saw the cigarettes. "Whose are those?"
"I have it under control, Gordon," she said a little softer. "The guilty parties have been given their punishment."
"Lucky for them it was you and not me," he muttered, the muscles in his jaw straining. All sorts of rage erupted inside Gordon Tooey, I thought. One day he was just going to blow apart. He was, as Crystal often said, combustible. He marched past us, his boots pounding the wooden floor down the corridor toward their private quarters. Everyone, even Louise, released a trapped breath.
"This isn't fair," I said. I was going to say more, but I saw Crystal shake her head and practically beg me to remain silent. "Ridiculous," I mumbled, turned myself and Raven around and retreated.
After we heard Louise leave, we snuck back to Crystal and Butterfly's room. They both looked stunned, Crystal slamming her books and grumbling to herself.
"I just have to get to the library to use the computer. There are some things I need to finish my papers," Crystal complained
"Just write out what I have to get and go to the library for you, Crystal," I offered. She sank in her seat.
"Who did this to us?" she asked, bewildered by the speed of the events.
"I don't think I have to take too many guesses," I said. She looked up. "Sweet Megan Callaway. She's been plotting to get back at us for days, especially after I embarrassed her in the dining room."
"Then why didn't she put the cigarettes in your room?"
"She probably thought it would hurt you and Butterfly more to be confined than it would me and Raven," I said. "And she knew that what happens to you, happens to all of us."
"I hate this place," Crystal moaned. She wasn't one to say it so vehemently. "It turns us all into . . . monsters."
"I'll take care of Megan," I said.
"It won't do me any good now," Crystal wailed.
"I don't like staying in the room all day," Butterfly whimpered. "Especially when it's nice out. Little flowers need sunshine," she added, mouthing something she often recited, something her stepmother had told her.
"Give some more thought to my suggestion, Crystal," I said, fixing my eyes on her. She stared at me for a moment, glanced at Butterfly and then turned back to her books.
Some of the other kids had come out of their rooms to see what had caused the commotion. Megan and her roommate were at the far end of the hall and I could see the look of satisfaction on Megan's face when everyone passed the news down the corridor.
"I'm just going to go down there and let her know we're on to her," I told Raven. I turned to walk toward Megan, but Raven held me back.
"I have another idea," she whispered. "Come on."
Confused, but intrigued, I followed her down the stairs. We went to the supply room and Raven snapped on the lights. She nodded at Patty Orsini's Polaroid camera.
"It has film in it too. She's saving the last t
hree pictures for a special occasion. She told me yesterday," she said.
"So?"
"I have the special occasion in mind," she continued with a sly smirk, taking the camera off the shelf.
"You can get fifty demerits for this," I warned her.
"We'll just borrow it. Don't worry." She stuffed the camera under her blouse and we quickly retreated, returning to our room where she outlined her idea.
"Raven, you little devil," I said excitedly. "Why didn't I think of that?"
She lingered at the door, which we kept slightly open while we waited. The girls were taking turns getting ready for bed. Megan Callaway, as usual, came out of her room with her towel. She wore her robe and went to the bathroom to shower. As soon as she closed the door, Raven nodded and the two of us slipped out and made our way to the bathroom. We listened at the door. When we heard the shower going, Raven opened the door by wedging her plastic library card between the tooth of the lock and the jamb. I had the camera in hand. Raven moved slowly, quietly and then we entered. Raven pulled back the shower curtain and I snapped the picture before Megan knew what was happening. It was a great shot, all frontal. She screamed and we were gone.
Hysterical with excitement, we returned to our room, shut the door and waited for the Polaroid to develop. The image emerged, clear and perfect. Revenge was at our fingertips. We put the camera back and then showed our prize to Crystal.
"What if it wasn't Megan who planted the cigarettes?" she wondered.
"I'm sure it was and even if it wasn't, she was somehow behind it, Crystal."
"We're all going to get into more trouble, you know," she said.
"At this point, I really don't care," I said, but Crystal looked toward Butterfly. "Don't worry, we won't involve her or you. Leave it to Raven and me." Megan Callaway had no idea what we were going to do, but we anticipated her going to Louise so we hid the picture under a bulge in our wallpaper, confident that a thorough search of our room would reveal nothing. For whatever reason, Megan didn't tell Louise anything.
The next day I put our plan into action. When we entered the dining room, I slipped into a seat beside Megan.
"That wasn't funny last night," she said.
"It wasn't meant to be," I said and then I opened my hand and she saw the picture. She turned pale as a ghost before a wave of red swept through her face. "There isn't a boy in this place who won't get to see this and don't think you can tell Louise because she'll never find it on us," I said.
She was near tears.
"You get up from here and go to Louise and tell her you planted the cigarettes to get back at Crystal or Butterfly. If you do, I'll give you the picture and no one will see it. If you don't . . ."
I looked toward Billy Edwards. Then I rose and deliberately headed in his direction. She watched in horror as I sat beside him and began a conversation, my eyes on her. I saw her take a long hard swallow and then stand up, her head down, as she made her way out of the dining room.
Quickly, to be sure she didn't turn me in with the picture, I gave it to Raven who left the dining room and hid it in the storage room. We were nearly finished with breakfast before Crystal and Butterfly appeared. Crystal wore a look that told us she and Butterfly had been excused from restrictions.
"What did you do?" she asked before sitting.
"Not much. Showed her the photo we had, told her we were going to make sure every single boy here saw it, and then promised to give it to her if she confessed."
"She did," Crystal said. "She's confined for the weekend."
"Raven gets the credit. It was all her idea," I said.
"I know how to deal with that sort of trash," she bragged.
"I'm going to the library," Crystal said. She stared at us a moment. "Thanks for helping us, but I wish . ."
"It had never happened?" I suggested. She nodded.
"I told you what I think we should do." "Let me think about it," she said.
"About what?" Butterfly asked.
I looked at Crystal and she nodded.
"About running away," I said.
"Running away!"
Raven practically leaped out of her seat to put her hand over Butterfly's mouth and told her to keep her voice down. Some of the others were looking our way and Gordon was talking to Grandma Kelly about a stove she said was malfunctioning.
"Run away?" Butterfly asked again in a lower voice when Raven took her hand from her mouth.
"Yes," Raven said. "Why not? I'm tired of doing chores, working for Gordon and Louise and pretending we're growing character and earning our keep. They're exploiting us. Crystal found out about the food, didn't she?"
"But . . no one will ever be able to adopt us again if we run away," Butterfly moaned. "And even if they could, they wouldn't want to adopt runaways."
"No one's going to be adopted from here, Butterfly, at least not one of us."
"Why not? I was almost adopted this week, wasn't I? It could happen. You said it could. You said I should want it to happen. You . ."
"Louise stopped it from happening," I blurted. She stared at me with her big, beautiful sad eyes.
"What do you mean?" she asked, and I told her what I had heard and what had happened. Her face softened, her lips trembling. "They think I'm crazy?"
"No. They know you're not crazy," Crystal said, "but they use whatever they can to keep us here for one reason or another, but especially for the money. It's all tax exempt, too. I'm afraid Brooke's right."
"It's getting too late for us, Butterfly," Raven said. "Teenagers are too much trouble. Parents want their children to be five forever."
"Raven's right," I said. "I even heard Gordon say it. Little children, little problems, big children, bigger problems. Anyway," I said, sitting back, "I don't know if I even want to be adopted anymore. I've been on my own so long, it just feels right, like an old shoe or something."
"Me too," Raven said.
"Then we should do it," I followed quickly, turning to Crystal. "We should finally take control of our lives."
"Where will we go?" Butterfly asked.
"West," I said, "to California."
"That's across the whole country," Butterfly said in a low whisper.
"We'll stop wherever we want and wherever we decide we're wanted," I replied. "But my guess is we'll go all the way."
Everyone was quiet, pensive, full of
imagination and dreams.
"You can become a dancer much easier out there, Butterfly," I told her. "And you can become a doctor, Crystal. And you can become a singer or an actress, Raven. You can go to auditions all day, all week until you become a star."
"What about you, Brooke?" Crystal asked. I thought.
"I could be me," I said.
Raven didn't want to do it, but I gave Megan the photograph as we had promised.
"A deal is a deal," I explained
"You don't make deals with people like that," Raven said. "Believe me, Brooke. I know."
There was a lot she did know about mean, manipulative people, but I didn't want to turn into someone I hated. I slipped the photograph under Megan's door and forgot about it.
All that following week, I devoted as much time to planning how we would run away and where we would go as I did to studying for my finals. I asked Crystal to go on the computer and see if she could find a travel route from New York to California.
"How would we travel?" she asked. "The four of us can't just hitchhike our way."
"Leave that part to me. I'm working on it," I said.
"Working on what? Trains, planes? I mean, how am I supposed to plan out a route if I don't know what you're thinking?" she asked.
I was afraid to say it, afraid that if she heard what I really had in mind, she would back out before we even began.
"For now, plan it by car," I said.
"A car? And just where are you going to get a car? You don't have a license; you don't have enough money for a car. Even if we pooled all our money, what sort of a car cou
ld we get? And then we would have no travel money. Really, Brooke, . ."
"Can't you just do that one thing for me? Please?" I asked, knowing she liked a challenge and loved to show off her ability on the computer.
"Fine. I'll just go to the Web and get into the Automobile Club. They provide routes and maps. Where are we going in California?" she asked, taking out her pen and notepad.
"Let's think about Los Angeles, first."
"Okay." She thought a moment. "It's almost summer. We can take a middle route or even a northern route. I'll get a few and we'll think about the pros and cons of each."
"That's exactly what I'd like to do, think about the pros and cons," I said. She gazed at me and smirked.
"I'm not going to do this if you make fun of me, Brooke."
"I'm not," I swore, but I couldn't help smiling at her. Finally, I just hugged her. "Do it. I'll take care of all the rest," I said.
"This still sounds like a pipe dream, Brooke. I'm doing it more as an intellectual exercise than anything else. I don't see how it will be possible," she said, as she gathered up her book bag and headed for the library.
I knew I still had a lot of convincing to do when it came to Crystal. She would have a hundred good and logical reasons why my plan was full of holes, but neither of us could know that just that very evening, Gordon would push her so far over the edge that I could have come up with a plan to ride a magic carpet, and she would have gone along.
Just before ten o'clock, Crystal went into the bathroom to take a bath and relax. Besides researching our travel route, she had been studying all day. Tomorrow was her last final and she was determined to get all A's.
About fifteen minutes after Crystal had gone to take her bath, Raven slammed her book closed, swearing never to look at another notebook or textbook again.
"I don't care if I fail everything," she declared. Raven was a good student, but we'd all had our fill of studying by now.
I was about to agree when we heard Crystal's scream. It was so loud it came right through the closed bathroom door and our closed bedroom door as well. I charged out and saw Gordon lumbering away, a tool box in his hand. He gazed back guiltily and then headed down the stairs. Raven looked at me and then at the bathroom door, her eyes full of Wonder and fear. Butterfly came to her doorway.