* * *
I reclaimed my chair after stuffing myself with dinner. I was about to hunt through my pile of gifts to find my new books when Shante came up to me.
"Will you read to me?" Shante held out a stack of picture books.
"Of course," I said, sitting back so Shante could climb onto my lap.
"Will you play your music box first?" She asked, pointing down at the pretty gold and lacquer box with a Phoenix blazed across its top that Five had given to me for Christmas, an odd coincidence.
"Sure," I said and opened the box. The tune inside sounded fast and vibrant, and I could imagine the Phoenix streaking through the air to the music. There wasn't any note or sticker on the box giving what the name of the piece. Maybe I would ask Five the next time I saw him.
Once the song ended I smoothed down Shante's green velvet skirt and began to read.
It wasn't long before Shante fell asleep. I pushed her pigtail out of my face and relaxed. I wish I’d thought to grab one of my books, now I would have to sit here until Shante woke up.
"Do you want me to take her?" Melanie asked, as she walked by.
"No, thanks. Would you get me one of my new books?"
"Sure, Sara." Melanie hunted through my pile of gifts. "Where are you going to put all this stuff?"
"I'm not sure. I'll have to get rid of some of my clothes to make room for all the new ones."
"I'll help you, we can get you some bins for the closet or something,” Melanie said handing me a book. "Here you go, give me a shout if you need anything else."
I smiled as Melanie plopped on the couch with her family. I knew I could join them, but it didn't feel right. Melanie was kind enough to share her holiday with us, but it wasn't right to sit in the middle of her family.
I couldn't help but wonder what next year's Christmas would bring. Would I be with Gavin and Anali? Would we celebrate in his home in New York or in some strange country? Would I be Sara or Sapphire?
I forced the questions down. I was supposed to celebrate today’s Christmas not wallow in angst.
Chapter Eleven
"Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one."