Page 6 of Vengeance & Remission

  #6 ONE DAY SOON

  Already a week passed by and nothing changed visibly. Marcus Lucius helped to prepare the dead ones to burry when others looked after useful or repairable armour parts. On the fourth day after the battle, he stood in the first rank during the burial. Up to then, he could move freely during the day, but he was escorted in double way. Pompeius's soldiers followed the guards freely arranged from the legionnaires in Eboracum. After the burial, he thanked his soldiers and went by feet to the villa. The strange caravan attracted attention of the city inhabitants. Roman women and children went out to the streets and asked “Who is he?”, “What is going on?”, “What are you going to do with him?”. The rumours about his contribution before and during the battle made rounds and some started comparing Marcus Lucius to Cincinnatus, one of the heroes of early Rome, a wonderful example of Roman outstanding leader, who was called to serve Rome as dictator, and who immediately resigned after completing his task, after he defeated the tribes of Aequians, Sabines, and Volscians. These virtue and simplicity brought Marcus Lucius the compassion of the people, who stood on the streets and prayed for his saving.

  Pompeius didn't send him to the cellar. Instead, Marcus Lucius got chained and could stay in the chamber that once was Julia's. He wasn't able to come to the window and to have a look at the sky. However, he was gazing at the bed and reminded the moments he spent with Julia. Twice a day a servant brought him water, sometimes even a hand full of crumbs stolen in the kitchen. Every day another servant came into the room, but nobody was mocking. In opposite, the slaves tried to walk on eggshells. Marcus Lucius smiled and thanked them in the local language. They smiled back and rushed to leave the room. Pompeius didn't occur in the next three days, but his voice echoed sometimes in the building.

  The eighth day became a special one. Marcus Lucius expected his execution. Instead, a man in his early 40ies with minimal Spanish issues on his face, hidden under a dark cape with hood stepped into the room. He wore military attire. He was alone. He stayed and looked from above to Marcus Lucius sitting on the floor. He didn't salute or say anything. His watchful, somewhat friendly, curious eyes, tried to make conclusions of unknown origins and meanings. Finally, he pushed Marcus Lucius's favourite chair and sat down directly in front of Marcus Lucius. He sighed.

  -I was asked to judge about your case. - The stranger said slowly finally. - I've heard a lot from different sides, and I wanted to speak with you directly. Will you tell me your story, soldier?

  Marcus Lucius was surprised, but he didn't show it. The stranger looked trustfully, but Marcus Lucius didn't intend to confess anything.

  -You won't... - The stranger said and smiled. - You're no whiner, who looks for quick advantages or someone's ear.

  Marcus Lucius analysed who the stranger was and couldn't guess.

  -I've heard that you left your camp without any permission and you killed your wife. You didn't come back to your commander and surprisingly, you lived here as Maxentius, the husband of Julia, the daughter of Julius Fabius. You took over the camp from Cornelius, the brother of Julius Fabius. I've heard you're the one, who ordered military training and drilling to be more rigorous, who even dined and slept amongst the soldiers, who buried properly the men he lost even if he was already accused of betrayal, who crushed the opponent lately, who has alliance with the local warriors. I've heard a lot about you these days, Marcus Lucius.

  Marcus Lucius listened carefully, but he nor refused nor confirmed anything.

  -I assume torturing won't bring me further. Is there anything that you would like to add as your defence?

  -I didn't kill my wife. I didn't take over the command over the camp. - Marcus Lucius said finally.

  -On whose orders did you act? - The stranger was apparently fascinated with the prisoner. - I've heard you got a lot of soldiers from Appius.

  -I take everything on my account. - Marcus Lucius said. His eyes burnt shorty as he heard the name of his friend, but there was no further reaction to see in his body.

  -So, this is the new hero of Rome. - The stranger smiled mysteriously. - You played with fire and it's not surprising that you got burnt. I hope you'll be more talkative when you see, who I brought here for you.

  The stranger stood up and left the room. Marcus Lucius felt weak, but he didn't feel dizzy. He wondered what the stranger tried to communicate and as he struggled with the task, he noticed a movement somewhere near to him. It wasn't wind coming from the small window or from any room of the house. Marcus Lucius heard fragile, dainty steps and he recognized Julia. He was convinced that he was dreaming, because Julia was supposed to stay with Nerva in a safe place. He got worried as he saw her silhouette and he waited until she was next to him. Without a word, she kneed in front of him and looked him in the eyes. He was tired, but happy and scared at once. She checked his forehead's temperature and she wasn't satisfied.

  -Don't say anything. I'll check your wound. The medico said...

  -Hush... - He interrupted her. - Don't say anything about wounds. What are you doing here?

  His voice included anger and bitterness. She smiled sadly and touched his neck. She peeked under his tunic and as her trembling hands touched his chest, he moved his fixed wrists to percept her fingers.

  -They said that they won't kill you, when I will come back. Nerva was sent to the camp and I was ordered here. - She had tears in his eyes, but she didn't cry. As she saw the already a huge, yellow bruise with suppurative issues on his chest, he got scared.

  -When?

  -Yesterday. We got the news from the city, from the slaves. They said you're prisoned. I had to see you.

  He didn't expect her to take over cleaning his wound and he was very thankful to her for her support. He leant on the backrest and let her draw the pus into the piece of the material in her hand. He didn't close his eyes, but stayed focused on her movements. She was professional and careful. Her moves were soft, but precise.

  -The medico said you need this herbals. Your scratches shouldn't be ignored. - She whispered as she rubbed an ointment into his skin. He didn't oppose, maybe due to the shock. He was tired and sleepy, but his furious look brought him additional powers:

  -You shouldn't have come here. Nerva was ordered to keep you away from here. - He whispered.

  -It was my decision, not yours or Nerva's. By what right are you telling me such things anyway? - She looked at him with disappointment.

  -By the right of a man who loves you and who can't die in peace now knowing you're in danger.

  -What do you want then? - She said and analysed whether she understood the part, when he said that he was loving her. A sparkle of joy occurred in her eyes and it was dashed by Marcus Lucius's gloomy look.

  -I want you to be safe, even if I won't be around. Now, it's over.

  -It's not over. The emperor... - She interrupted him hastily.

  -So, it was the emperor himself... - Marcus Lucius smiled surrealistically.

  -He's here. You have to tell him everything. Then, he will decide what to do. Maybe, he will give you back the freedom. He won't kill you. It wouldn't make a good impression in people's eyes.

  -What am I supposed to say? Should I betray my friends and you to save my own skin? - He wasn't serious, because the idea occurred him strange and improbable.

  Julia hadn't any answer for it. She kneed in front of him and it was close enough to feel his warm body, but too far away to feel his heartbeat. However, she added after a moment:

  -If you will get any choice, chose to live, no matter what...

  Marcus Lucius smiled. She has stolen him the promise he required from her once.

  -I wanted you to wake up every day and chose me every morning as the person you want to wake up another day. - He said calmly. His hand stroked her cheek. The chain rasped.

  -And now, you don't want it anymore? - She wondered as he stroked her right eyebrow that was already healed. Just a little, cute scar reminded him about her wound.

  -I can't live if l
iving is without you, but I'm a dead man walking. With my last breath, I will fight for your freedom. It won't be easy considering the current circumstances, but I will try to do my best. - He answered. - Don't worry, we'll succeed somehow.

  Julia breathed with relief. Knowing that he was calm and full of hopes brought back the inner peace. In the same moment, Marcus Lucius tried as much as possible to stay convincing and to calm her down in a fighting a losing battle.

  -If not, I will follow you in the afterlife. - She claimed seriously.

  He wondered whether Decima was so strong, too. The more he observed Julia the more he knew that he didn't know his wife at all. It was a scary finding, but it seemed to be true.

  -You should go. - He said as she finished.

  She stood up unhurriedly while she stroke his face. As she went away, he felt even worse as ever before. In his angry mood, he didn't notice as Pompeius appeared.

  -You see, I have nobody, who is important to me so much that I wouldn't fall asleep knowing that such person is in danger. You're vulnerable. I am not. - His words were full of confidence.

  -It's not hard to die when you know you have been loved.

  -You're wrong, Marcus Lucius. You're wrong. It's even harder than you think. -Pompeius turned around wit furious sparkles in his eyes and left.

  The forenoon passed by. The afternoon was over. Evening prowled slowly. The wind that came into Julia's chamber brought the first scents of spring. Drapes danced in the room as four guards brought Marcus Lucius away from the chamber. He was let through the dining room, where he used to eat meals in company of Julia and Nerva. He was pushed to go further and finally. He stood in the yard, where he used to practice his skills. There, the stranger was waiting for him. Marcus Lucius saluted.

  -Now, you already know who I am, soldier. - Hadrian smiled.

  Marcus Lucius didn't response.

  -Please, sit down and let's talk. If you don't want to tell me anything, then don't. - He made a short pause. - I sent you Julia. I give you my word that she won't get hurt by anyone.

  Marcus Lucius sighed and sit down next to the emperor. His tension decreased, but didn't disappear.

  -She is a very charming being. - The emperor continued quietly. - Life is all about living for one another, so we try to live with those who we love and respect most. - He sighed deeply and stopped talking for a while. He breathed the air deeply and savoured the moment. - As I became the emperor, I wished to have a period of peace. I don't want any further, unnecessary battles or wars. The empire needs to rest. We, soldiers, need to rest. We need to look after what is most important in life... As far as I can see it, you did the right thing. You improved the skills and the morals of soldiers. You didn't run away, even if you had enough chances to flee. You let your soldiers to a fight and you won. You developed good relationships with the local folks. I've heard you even speak their language. You are the man I need for a period of peace. You are a good soldier and a good man. What happened to you that you landed here?

  Marcus Lucius listened carefully. The emperor made a reliable impression.

  -My wife got killed. I don't know for which reasons, but she got killed by a man I trusted. He warned me and wanted to kill me as well. As I reached Rome, it was already too late. I wanted to get my revenge, so I turned back and was on the way to Brigetio again.

  Hadrian listened and nodded in the sign of understanding.

  -I am not sure what happened near to Aquincum. I saw an ambush and helped to defend the travellers. I asked who was attacked and the man, Maxentius, was already dead. I don't know why I didn't report it anyone. I simply said to soldiers from Appius, who appeared a moment later, I am Maxentius and they took it for trust. They got orders from Appius to accompany the convoy to Britannia. As I came here, it was increasingly complicated to say the truth. I played the role I have chosen and I did my best to serve the empire.

  -You're lying to me right now. - Hadrian smiled mischievously. - I should put you back in the cellar.

  Marcus Lucius kept the stony face expression and waited for emperor's next move.

  -Ah, Marcus Lucius, you're a really good man. I need such men in my service. Maybe you don't know that I am involved into Dacian wars. I sent for Appius, because he is the best trainer and I needed him. He confessed being the man, who ordered you to go to Britannia. I heard you were badly wounded and the assumption of Pompeius wasn't consistent for me. An unconscious man can't hold anyone in the palm of his hand. Appius allayed my doubts. He told me what he ordered and what you fulfilled.

  Marcus Lucius stunned. He didn't know anymore which background information Hadrian had, but the emperor was clued-up.

  -Don't be scared. I wanted to prove your loyalty and you passed the test. - Hadrian laughed quietly. His calm, friendly being was unique. He was like the older brother that you wish to have, if you don't know what t do next and need an advisor. - Independently from each other, I communicated with Appius and with Pompeius. They were ordered to give you whether backup or opportunity to act freely. Don't be cross with me. - He laughed and Marcus Lucius had to smile. - I needed to prove you. I've heard stories about your father. I know how it is to be compared... - Hadrian's mood changed. He became nostalgic and sad. Marcus Lucius didn't comment anything. He waited patiently. - I want to be a kind like Trajan, a good emperor, who brings peace and wealth to the people. Therefore, I need people like you, reliable, good soldiers.

  -So, Pompeius is as reliable and good soldier as I? - Marcus Lucius asked.

  -Not quite. He's a good man, but he was already betrayed once. He's a good, but he bears grudges. He cannot bear Appius. It's an old resentment. They don't speak about it. I don't ask. However, they had the same request related to you.

  Hadrian moved. Marcus Lucius was tensed from curiosity.

  -I was in the South for too long. I can't withstand even low temperatures anymore... It's cold here. Let's go inside. Let's eat something.

  -Will you tell me please what they were asking for? - Marcus Lucius dared to raise a question.

  The emperor, who could easily be his ordinary commander, smiled brighter.

  -I'll tell you when you tell me your whole story.

  That was the catch. Hadrian wanted to get to know the entire story. He had enough puzzles to put the pieces together, but listening the full version could underline the kind of trust they already had. Marcus Lucius was undecided and hesitated, because he wasn't sure how he should describe the relationship with Julia. It was his sorrow. He needed to talk with her. He needed to know what she said to Hadrian, if she already spoke with him.

  Hadrian saw Marcus Lucius's vacillation and left him alone. Before he left, he gave Marcus Lucius a letter from Appius. Marcus Lucius thanked shortly and stayed in the yard and in the dimmed light of the torches outside, he read the lines that his friend wrote. It wasn't much. Actually, few sentences were there. Appius's writing was hard to decode, not only due to his own, typical spidery handwriting, but also from the missing context:

  “You've experienced a lot in the last weeks. Remember, one person can make a difference. If you ignore it, you won't get to know what your contribution was and you won't get your personal absolution. Where is a will there's a way. Choose what's right for you. No regrets.”

  Marcus Lucius read it a couple of time and wasn't sure what Appius wanted to say to him. With confused face and tensed body, he joined the supper. At the table, Pompeius sat already next to the emperor and they talked about something funny. They laughed and Pompeius looked so relaxed that Marcus Lucius wondered that Pompeius could enjoy such a level of freedom. Pompeius hadn't the already good known jeering sparkles in his eyes. In opposite, his eyes looked really friendly, even joyful.

  Marcus Lucius saluted and they responded with a friendly nod. Although the mood was lax, a kind of skilled routine was in the air. Nobody could put it away and hang up like a coat in a hallway. Hadrian noticed that Marcus Lucius knew from the very first step how many soldiers were in the room
, who was sitting where and to whom he should salute at first. Hadrian observed Marcus Lucius already from the very beginning and he liked what he saw.

  Marcus Lucius also realised a while ago that Hadrian was a trained soldier. His moves were fluent, practiced. His nod, his move to lift a glass, his move to check what his soldiers were doing... Everything fitted, built a coherent, soldierly oneness. Marcus Lucius didn't know, but Hadrian felt the same kind of respect towards him.

  Julia sat on the left side of the emperor. She wore a new dress and trembled. The temperature was low and the thick-skinned men weren't sensitive enough to percept the draft in the air. Marcus Lucius looked how she tried not to raise any attention. He wasn't sure whether he should help her or whether his care would be taken as his weakness. “Screw it!” he thought and detoured with a stopover at a trunk, where some blankets were. He put out one of them, a red one, and muffled her up carefully. She didn't say a word.

  Hadrian and Pompeius observed it rather less pushy. They didn't comment it, but their minds noticed the act of Marcus Lucius very clearly. Julia was insecure and pulled the edges of the blanket to cover her even more, to hide herself. She tried not to interrupt any discussion. She was the only woman in the round and she wasn't supposed to say anything important. She smiled politely and tried not to look directly at anyone. She thought about the message she got from Appius. He wrote just one sentence and she wasn't sure what it all meant. She hid the paper under a ribbon of her dress as nobody was looking. She felt every letter from Appius piece of paper: “You were born, because you were going to be important to someone.”

  After she saw Marcus Lucius on the evening after the battle, she backtracked with Nerva to Cunobarros's village. She didn't feel comfortable there, because she felt observed by everyone. Nerva tried to stay in her sight, but he didn't want to “limit her spirit” as he called it. She mostly sat down in a cottage that was domiciled by a local family. The mistress of the home was a tall, slender, young woman with two children that were already old enough to help in the village's works. Julia didn't feel good as she listened to talks between the woman and her man. It sounded unfriendly and included a lot of looks in her own direction. It was the late winter. It was too early to go outside and work on the land. The entire family spent its days in the cottage. There was not much food and the portions were strictly limited. Julia wasn't sure whether the villagers were inconvenient with her presence or whether they were scared of Nerva's sword. Nerva used to exercise his wrists and sometimes, he even did it with his weapon. The fury sparkles in the eyes of the family's elders showed their attitude towards the situation. Then, Nerva went outside the cottage and continued his training. Julia followed him and whether she sat down on the ground or she stood some steps away from him. They didn't talk with each other, but they exchanged minimal smiles every now and then.

  The days were long and the nights were even longer. Nerva let Julia to lay her head on his chest. His armour was put aside and he took the pieces of material he got from Cunobarros and covered Julia in it. She was still trembling, so he moved her closer to his warm body. She glued to him as if he would be a bedwarmer. He wasn't familiarized with such long proximity of a woman next to him and he seemed to be tensed a bit. Julia wasn't good with the situation either, because she wished to have Marcus Lucius at her side. Marcus Lucius was more gentle and close. She wasn't thinking how to touch him anymore. With Nerva, she minded every movement and sometimes, she even woke up, because she had a twitch. Nerva said her to relax and as he laid his arm around her, she get calmer. He tried not to stroke her, even if he had sometimes a strong reflex to do it.

  Cunobarros stepped by to the cottage every day. He brought the news. Some of his men were serving in Maxentius's villa. They conveyed the pieces of information related to Marcus Lucius. Julia already learnt to discriminate the sound of Marcus Lucius's name in the local dialect. It sounded like an alias. It was spoken respectfully and quickly. Nerva laughed as she tried to imitate the sound, when everybody ignored her. Cunobarros said that Marcus Lucius was wounded, but not seriously. The old man added that Marcus Lucius was on the battle field and spoke prayers for the fallen people. As Cunobarros reported that Marcus Lucius was imprisoned and let through the streets of Eboracum to Maxentius's villa, Julia almost fainted. Nerva kept her hand and almost pulped it by his pressure. He wanted to follow Cunobarros, but the old man refused at first. As some hours later, Cunobarros stepped into the cottage, where both Romans were, he asked Nerva to go out with him for a talk. Julia didn't like to stay alone and Nerva didn't accept leaving her.

  -It's just a moment. I insist. We'll stay there, next to the tree. - Cunobarros showed with his hand which tree he meant and Nerva accepted the deal. There was something in Cunobarros's eyes that had to be told from man to man. Their talk was quite long and Cunobarros gesticulated. Julia followed his moves like a crouching cat that couldn't decide whether to go outside or stay in the building. Nerva shook his head without satisfaction, rather nerved. Cunobarros made a lot of short, irritable steps. As they finally came back, Nerva got a glass with the local alcohol. He drank it at once. Then, he got another shot and the stuff had to be hard enough. Nerva neck a lot, but he got shaky legs and sat down less carefully in the place, where he normally spent nights. He showed Julia not to ask anything. He had to think over. Julia was sorrowed and wasn't sure what he heard.

  -Is he fine? Is he alive? - She asked with a trembling voice. - She imagined already the worst case scenario and she almost started crying. If Nerva was so broken apart, then he had to know something bad. It had to be so bad that he wasn't able to speak it aloud. It had to be horrible, terrifying and dark as a region of space time where gravity prevents even light from escaping. Her fear raised by absorbing the dangerous thoughts the same way a supermassive black hole grew by merging with other black holes and cumulating millions of solar masses.

  Nerva saw it all in her eyes and said “No...”, but it didn't sounded convincing. The mistress of the home looked for the very first time with a kind of envy and compassion to Julia. The Roman girl started walking chaotically on the limited space where she was. Nerva caught her arm and pushed to him. She felt down to him and he checked whether he didn't hurt her. She started to jig forwards and backwards like a mad person. Nerva pushed her and settled her between his legs. Then, he pressed his knees together so that Julia wasn't able to move. He hugged her and laid his head on her frowned back. His breath was warm. His pressure was perceptible and needed to calm down the girl.

  Finally, Nerva felt asleep in such a strange position. His arms loosened and felt to Julia's feet. He whispered something in sleep. Julia wasn't able to understand it. She wasn't able to fall asleep and wobbled still a bit. She imagined the world that wasn't worth to live. She wasn't sure what to do. There were many alternatives, but there was no conception that could bring her further. A great nothing filled her soul and she wasn't able to stop falling down into the emptiness. She was looking somewhere, where nobody could follow. Nerva whispered a word and woke up. His chin landed on her shoulder blade. He sighed sadly.

  -What's going on? - She whispered as she tried to turn back to him.

  She managed a half-turn. Nerva's head moved to her and she saw helplessness in his eyes. Just the eyes sparkled in the moonlight. Nerva's fingers touched her lips and she understood that he didn't like her to say anything. She moved a bit. She wanted to add something anyway. His hand covered her mouth immediately. It brought a wave of fury, but before she could even react, he pulled her with his other hand and her head landed on his chest. She listened to his mad heartbeat and wondered what it all meant.

  -Don't move. Don't cry. - Nerva said abuzz through clenched teeth.

  She nodded as far as it was possible. His hand moved away from her mouth. Instead, he hugged her with both hands again. His grip was even stronger than before. Maybe he forgot that she was a girl, that she was a dainty being, that he should protect her from hurt. He held her close to him like a
baby that had to get soothed. It wasn't a comfortable position, but she tried to keep it.

  -They know that Marcus Lucius has good contact to the locals, so they announced that they won't kill him, when we come back. They want you. I can't allow you to go there, because Marcus Lucius will kill me, if he gets it. You should stay here. Right?

  Julia didn't ask which “they” he meant. Instead, she felt weak and if she would stay on her feet, she would fell down to the ground like an inflexible bag of potatoes. She wouldn't crash, because Marcus Lucius was alive. She would fall down due to her relief. The sudden shot of energy pushed her to stretch her arms. She hugged Nerva tightly, ridiculously joyful. She needed to percept any resistance, any substance, anything to be sure she was still living. She felt how tensed his muscles were.

  -What should we do? I promised him not to flee... - She whispered rather to herself and Nerva pulled her stronger to his chest. He didn't like her talking, not in this moment. She didn't like to speak aloud her fears and doubts, either. Thousands of thoughts run through her mind and there was no solution she could stand up for.

  Early in the morning, they were still so close to each other as never before.

  -I will go there. They can't kill him. - Julia said determined and resourceful.

  -Cunobarros advised against it. He promised to protect you as I did. We can't bring you there. We'll move even further in the woods in case of patrolling would step here by. - Nerva spoke like a dead man. There was no emotion in his voice. His eyes were glazy. He didn't see it all from the white-black-perspective. He saw the grey shades glueing to every option and even creating a whole range of possibilities.

  -I will go there, Nerva. You can't stop me. I will rescue him.

  Nerva laughed madly. If Marcus Lucius could be saved, then under his own steam. Marcus Lucius was clever enough to escape from any trap. The only condition was knowing that Julia was safe. Nerva wasn't sure how to handle Julia. He couldn't play in front of her. She became suddenly so important that he simply couldn't look her in the eyes and lie. This proximity pricked his conscience. It became too hard to keep the distance. If it would be a sexual matter, he would have sex with her and everything would go over. But it wasn't sexual. Having her in his arms didn't titillate him. It was pleasant, but it felt rather like having an anchor, even if she hadn't any clue about it. She was like a sister he never had and that he wanted to protect from the entire world. Her wealth became even more important than his own life. In his limited perception, he would do anything she wished just to see her happy, relieved smile. It was hard to protect her, if he internally became unable to decline her anything. His mind warned him and communicate refusal, but his heart forced him to accept whatever she planned. That woman had a plan. It was of course a stupid plan. She forged it in the shadows of the night and announced her non-rejectable wishes with a do-or-die politeness in her voice.

  -I will go there. If they won't keep their word, everybody will get the wind of their lies.

  She asked for paper and a feather with an optimistic, feverish sparkle in the eye and a kind of gritty smile in the corner of her mouth. Cunobarros wasn't satisfied with her decision and he didn't support it. He stood some meters away and his entire silhouette including the arms crossed on his chest and bushy, frowned eyebrows. Julia ignored the older man. She wrote a letter to Appius and as she gave it to Cunobarros, she asked to send the note, if anything would go wrong. She took off a golden ring from her finger and gave it to Cunobarros as the pay-off. It was more than enough to defray the expenditures. Cunobarros was charmed by her, too, because he nodded, even if his unfriendly face expression didn't change. He cursed in his dialect and looked at Nerva with a kind of message that Nerva understood as “If she'll get hurt, then you have no reason to come back.” At least, that version was logical to Nerva. For real, Cunobarros cursed Julia's light-headedness and expressed just the thought that she would bring them all to a painful fall with her shattered, naïve plan.

  Nerva dragged like a handicapped person. His moves were slower as usually and missed the fluency. He wasn't doing it with heart and soul. With a stony face and heavy stomach, he brought her to the villa.

  Pompeius wasn't there, because he was in the camp. However, the soldiers of Pompeius circled around them. Nerva didn't jump to the ground as he usually did. Julia was sitting in front of him and she hugged him tighter. He waited for Pompeius to come back. Nerva's mere was exasperated due to standing for hours in the middle of armoured enemy.

  As Pompeius finally came back, he smiled in his scary way. He didn't say anything, but he saluted to Nerva. As Pompeius noticed how badly Julia looked like in her dirty dress, saggy cheeks and furious eyes, he said that she should get bath and rest. She refused. She wanted to see Marcus Lucius right away. Pompeius refused and told her to be patient.

  -We won't hurt you. I promise. - He said and wanted to help her to demount.

  She didn't trust him, so she didn't let him to help herself and waited until Nerva finally, with no hesitation stood on the ground and brought her off the horse in slow motion. They all went to a room that Julia never used earlier. It was as spacey as Julia's chamber. There were even two pallets. Julia was tired, but she wasn't able lay down and rest and ignore everything around her as if Marcus Lucius wouldn't be prisoned, as everything would be fine.

  -Stay here and wait for tomorrow. You'll get a meal soon. I suppose you don't like to participate in the supper with me.

  Julia's look showed her refusal and scorn. Nerva stood with his stony face and didn't budge.

  -No! - She screamed. - Where is...

  Before she ended her question in the same jittery tone, Nerva jumped to her and put his hand on her mouth. She didn't except his action. If anyone should attack her, then she took into consideration that it would be Pompeius or one of his soldiers that followed him like ducklings follows their mother. Julia tried to set her free, but Nerva bounded her with his other arm even stronger.

  -Is he alive? - Nerva droned shortly as Pompeius smiled.

  -He is. - Pompeius answered.

  His soldiers moved nervously. Julia tried to free herself. Nerva moved shortly his head in a minimal bow.

  -Fair enough. - Pompeius smiled again and left the room.

  A couple of soldiers stayed as guard. They looked curiously to the Roman girl that was still wobbling in the grasp of a soldier. She hadn't any chances with him. They smiled and followed the situation with excitement.

  -Promise to be quiet. - Nerva whispered.

  Julia nodded and he took his hand off, but his arm kept her close to her.

  -You bastard! - She screamed and regretted it after a moment, because Nerva's hand landed on her mouth again. She tried to say something and wriggled a lot.

  -Julia, I mean it, be quiet.

  He waited until she lost her powers and first then, he let her go.

  -I had to prevent you saying his real name. It would betray you. You have to be more careful... - Nerva whispered in conspiracy.

  She breathed heavily and came back to him to smash his chest with her wrists. She felt so stupid, so stupid...

  Nerva gave free rein to her aggression. She punched him as long as she was able and then, she felt down to the ground. Immediately, he kneed down in front of her and checked whether she was fine. Of course, she wasn't, even if her body wasn't harmed.

  -What have I done? - She asked him with tears in the eyes.

  He bit his tongue just not to say that he was the stupid man who allowed her to implement her stupid plan. He started regretting the decision already as they were leaving the cottage. He tried to convince Julia that the idea was bad, but she set her mind on accomplishing the mission. He never before saw her such determined and calm in the specific way. It was impressive and indeed stupid. He cursed her as the dumbest woman alive and reckon that they were going to get executed. She didn't believe it. She said she had a feeling. Nerva snorted. He didn't have a feeling. Instead, he had a scared mind.

&
nbsp; -They will kill us. - She said.

  He smiled, because she simply understood his arguments. Better late than never! However, it didn't bring them any further.

  -No, they won't. If they wanted to kill us, they had enough opportunities to do it. They have a plan. They need us. It gives us a chance...

  Julia moved to him and hugged him. She didn't cry, but she was very close to fall apart. She was tired and the stress brought fever. Nerva wanted to lift her and bring into bed, but she didn't want to move. Nerva embraced her and kept as long as she felt asleep from the kind of a battle fatigue. As he wanted to leave her alone, she quietly asked him not to go. There was not a lot of place. He laid down on the pallet and her head landed on his chest. He covered her with a blanket and wasn't able even to have a nap. He needed her proximity as much as she needed his. He was watchful and analysed the situation. It wasn't easy to find a good way to proceed.

  Early in the morning, two servants came in with the meal. They brought already cut to pieces meat, some fruits, vegetables, bread, and even honey to sweeten food. Nerva jumped out of the pallet, but Julia didn't wake up. She was still feverish. She even coughed twice. One of servants smiled shyly. Nerva recognized the man. It was one of men he saw already somewhere around Cunobarros. Nerva couldn't recognize the circumstances, but definitely, the man was connected to the elder. The long-haired, trim figure whispered a word, but Nerva didn't understand it due to the local dialect. He wasn't sure how was it meant and why the servant used non-Roman expression to communicate.

  Shortly after the meal was brought, the slaves left the room. Nerva forced Julia to eat a bit, even if she opposed with all kind of signals her body sent. She was tired and felt sick. Her temperature was high, but she complained once how cold it was in the room. Nerva covered her with a blanket and rubbed her back as she laid on the pallet. Towards evening, the servants brought the second meal that looked exactly the same as the breakfast. Julia ignored everything and warmed up as she heard the one expression articulated by the same servant as early in the morning. She smiled and nodded as a gesture to thank. Nerva wondered what caused such a reaction and she tried to find something in the depth of her memories. She looked after a word or even a phrase to ask a question. Her attempt took too long and the servants stepped back. The moment passed by. The servants left the room. She cursed and Nerva wondered where did she learnt such expressions. Her jittery hands and shaky legs proved that she was more than excited or nervous. She showed him to move closer to her and whispered in conspiracy:

  -He's alive. He's good. - She smiled with feverish eyes and Nerva was convinced she simply missed some medicine. He was worried, even if he liked her dreamy, devilish charm she had in her entire body tension.

  -I understood it, Nerva, really. I am not sick. I feel fine. - She continued as she noticed Nerva's doubting look that said rather “Yeah, right, girl” instead of “Oh, that's wonderful”.

  He forced her to eat up her supper and to get into bed. She was too excited to fall asleep and the smile didn't vanish from her lips. It was strange.

  Around the midnight, he noticed that something changed in the room. There was someone who tried to come closer without raising attention. Nerva didn't recognize the steps and followed the minimal noise.

  -Don't be bothered, soldier. - Nerva listened to rather friendly, manly voice. - Come with me, soldier.

  It sounded like a polite order, in the way Appius would say it. Nerva shivered shortly just due to the memory of Appius and his doubts weren't calmed enough to trust the stranger, whose face was hidden by the night.

  -My personal guard will take over your task, if you don't mind letting the emperor's soldiers to defend her. Of course, temporarily...

  Nerva stunned and he was luckily enough that the darkness of the room covered his confusion. Just his nervous, loud swallowing of spit was a perceptible sign of his abashment.

  The emperor slapped him friendly on the shoulder and brought to the dining room. In the lights of torches, Nerva looked at the man, who was a bit younger than Appius, but older than Marcus Lucius. Hadrian's hands were strong and thick-skinned from holding a sword. As far as Nerva got the rumours, Hadrian justifiably wore military attire, often dined and slept amongst the soldiers. He was more than just a philosopher that sits far away from the reality and studies everything from a glass balloon. Hadrian was mostly involved into the military matters and had information at first hand.

  -Soldier, you are a true friend of Marcus Lucius.

  Nerva shivered and got distrustful. Mentioning the name of Marcus Lucius was a test. Hadrian smiled fatherly:

  -I know that Maxentius is dead. I know that Marcus Lucius pretended to be Maxentius and I want to get to know all his reasons. We, or rather I, need him to tell me the entire truth so that I can judge the situation properly.

  Nerva nodded, but kept silence.

  -You are a very good friend, indeed. - The emperor was impressed. - Therefore, I let you go back to the camp and continue with trainings you started with the legionnaires.

  -It wasn't my idea. - Nerva added quickly as Hadrian started to turn back. - It was... It was his idea. He wanted them to be worth to be called legionnaires. He pushed it through.

  The emperor moved and seemed to be interested of what Nerva could say more about the fascinating man that Hadrian didn't meet yet.

  -What kind of person is he? - The emperor asked and showed Nerva to accompany him on the way through the hallway.

  Nerva was insecure what to say. Additionally, he didn't intend to leave the place too far away. He had to stay in the direct sight of Julia's pallet. Hadrian noticed it after few steps forwards. Nerva stopped and didn't go further anymore. Hadrian respected it, but didn't comment it. It encouraged Nerva to speak:

  -He is reliable. He honours a pledge. He values the daily training and shares his skills with everyone without being stingy. He's a good teacher... He's... He's a good man.

  -Yes, yes... - Hadrian nodded as sign of following the thought of Nerva. - I've heard that he keeps good relationships with the locals. I've heard they supported him during the battle.

  Nerva reminded the secret help of the locals, who informed Marcus Lucius about the moves of the men from the North and the arrival of additional Roman cohorts as Pompeius came. Nerva smiled, because the bargain with the locals included many obligations and favours on each side.

  -He arranged everything. He has skills that support keeping the peace. He stands up for the policy of peace.

  Hadrian smiled. He tried to force the peace as far as it was possible. He already withdrew from Trajan's conquests in Mesopotamia and Armenia. He even started considering to abandon Dacia due to local problems there. He needed people, who could keep the peace.

  -So, he's good with the local ruling parties?

  -Yes, he's good with them. They respect each other. - Nerva answered shortly as he reminded Cunobarros's support in the last days.

  -Good, good... - Hadrian seemed to be satisfied. - And the girl you protect is his girl?

  Nerva changed his attitude immediately in the moment Hadrian mentioned Julia indirectly. He was distrustful again. He thought over before he answered drily.

  -She was the wife of Maxentius.

  -But Maxentius died on the way here...

  -He died during the ambush. As Marcus Lucius came there, Maxentius was already dead.

  Nerva has bitten his tongue. He said too much and he regretted that he let himself into such a conversation.

  -I appreciate your support, soldier. You will go to the camp and act in place of the temporary camp commander.

  -With all due respect, but no. - Nerva refused immediately.

  -You don't trust me. - Hadrian concluded. - You have all the right not to trust me, but it's an order.

  -With all due respect, I have a personal obligation and if I am supposed to go back to the camp, I have to take the girl with me. I won't leave her under anyone's supervision.

  Hadrian smiled frien
dly.

  -Even not under mine? I am a good soldier.

  -I don't put it into the question, sir, however, I promised to guard her.

  -Did you promise it to Marcus Lucius or to yourself? - Hadrian asked without awaiting any answer. It was obvious that Nerva wouldn't give him any hint about it. Talking about Marcus Lucius was allowed, but mentioning Julia was pushing Nerva too far.

  -You're a good man, soldier. Stay over night there, but you have to take command over the camp. I can't send Marcus Lucius back there yet. You'll go and I personally take the watch over the girl.

  Nerva wasn't satisfied. He planned to refuse the task again, even if the honour was huge. He saluted and went back to the pallet, where Julia slept. She was smiling, because her teeth sparkled due to the reflected light of the moon. Her forehead was feverish, but not so extremely anymore. He stroked her hair and sighed deeply. He was strongly confused.

  As she woke up, she wondered why he was so serious. It was already early morning, but it wasn't so bright yet. Torches were put into the hangers in the room by silent servants.

  -What are you thinking of? - She asked sleepy.

  -About the next step.

  -You look sad. What is bothering you?

  He told her about his talk with the emperor. Julia listened carefully, even if Nerva left aside the part related to her. He reported what task he got and Julia advised him not to resist to the most important man in the universe.

  -You'll go there and you'll do what he ordered you. I had a good feeling and as you can see, I was right. If the emperor will ban us, then it's the final decision. At least, we have the opportunity to meet him and maybe even to influence his decision.

  Her words were full of sense and wisdom, but Nerva still didn't like to rely on a feeling. It wasn't perceptible enough and he didn't trust anyone. Julia kissed him on the right cheek and stroked his temple shortly.

  -You will do this for me. You will go there for me. - She whispered determined.

  He sighed and felt perplex.

  -Why do you think I would do anything for you? I got orders from Marcus Lucius. - He said finally with anger.

  She smiled and stood up. She was ready to fight. She wasn't sure what she was going to do, but she new that the emperor was the only, the last chance for any rescue. On one side, she was scared and felt lost, but a strange, unknown power started to fill her. It was like a high tide that could wash away even a boat. However, as she saw the emperor personally, she felt that the energy disappeared for a moment. She turned back to Nerva and ordered:

  -Just go, simply go and do what the emperor said. I'm good.

  Nerva noticed the change in her voice. It meant something, but he wasn't sure what. There was no time to ask anything directly. He looked at her with the question “Are you sure?” and she nodded. She smiled briefly and as Hadrian came closer to her, she let him going shoulder to shoulder.

  -So, it's you. - She said calmly.

  -So, that's me. - The emperor answered. - You always meet twice.

  Apparently she knew the man. Nerva stunned and wondered why she didn't mention even a word that she already knew the emperor. He felt betrayed and left the strange couple.

  -You didn't know that it's me.

  -I didn't know. - She answered and the soldiers around couldn't follow the talk.

  She noticed that he didn't change optically, he just got a bit older, more grown-up with wise wrinkles on his forehead. What he beheld were good, faithful sparkles in his eyes, soldierly manners, stringy hands and hollow cheeks. His moves were dynamic and targeted. His eyes were vivid and attentive as if he was a watch dog. Just his tone didn't suit to the clear, trained being. His tone belonged to the philosopher inside of the hard core surface. He used to be that way already as they met for the very first time.

  -You're like Hebe that makes me young again. - He added dreamy.

  She remembered that he was a supporter of the idea of Magna Graecia, just as she was. Her memories came back and she reminded a horribly hot day in a summer years ago. She was a child, she was maybe six, maybe seven, and she sat in the shadow of the garden trying to forge lines from Hesiod's Theogony. She tried not to forget that Uranus mated with Gaia to create twelve Titans: Hyperion, Mnemosyne, Phoebe, Iapetos, Theia, Rhea, Themis, Oceanus, Coeus, Crius, Tethys and Cronus as well as three cyclopes named Brontes, Steropes and Arges, and additionally three Hecatonchires called Briareos, Kottos, and Gyges. Keeping the list in her mind wasn't easy and she knew that her mother would slap her for laziness, if Julia wouldn't list the names with one breath. The girl didn't notice when a stranger came into the garden and when he started listening to her repeated phrases. She had closed eyes and dynamically moving hands. The sun went unhurriedly from one point of the sky to another. The shadow moved and Julia needed to change her place as well. In that moment, as she opened her eyes, she realized that there was a young man sitting on the dingy grass. At close range, he had friendly, curious eyes and a trustworthy smile. His right arm was bandaged completely. His left arm laid on his knees and steadied his chin.

  -Who are you? - She asked coolly impudent or rather presuming.

  -I am a guest of your father. I'm here with my friend, Appius. Do you know him? - The stranger answered and smiled even brighter. He knew that she knew already the things he said. He saw her already a couple of times after his arrival to Julius Fabius. They came just under three weeks ago and tried not to wear out Julius's welcome. He invited Appius and was pleased that the Roman soldier and the best trainer in the entire empire. It was a honour to regale Appius in own house, especially after Appius denied any host in private houses. He was still mourning after death of his best friend. Hadrian accompanied him on behalf of his protectors, among all Trajan.

  Julia knew who Appius was. She followed him unobtrusively as far as it was possible. She trailed him already almost daily. It was a skilled soldier with a very sad face. What made him fascinating were his empty eyes, if she ignored the downcast sparkles. He used to notice her presence every time she followed him. Julia wasn't scared of the man, who didn't say a word and avoided any contact. She felt compassion and wondered what happened to that man. He looked like Erebus, who was the place of darkness between the earth and the underworld. She couldn't imagine him as a relieved, satisfied man. Julia listened to what anyone said about Appius and collected a bundle of information. She heard that he was an extraordinary soldier, who could bring anyone how to fight in the best way, how to kill the enemy in any thinkable way, how to injure a foe in the most horrible way. He was like the longest venomous snake in Africa, the black mamba, the fastest and the most poisonous snake in the world, which name was derived from Ancient Greek words meaning a combination of tree asp and venomous snake. Julia heard that Appius hadn't any enemies, besides warriors, who were already on a hiding to nothing, if they intended to fight against him. Additionally, he wasn't shy and didn't seek to escape when a confrontation occurs. Then, he didn't act aggressively towards the surrounding, even if he looked dangerously the entire time. He hadn't tendency to actively attack without provocation. Steadily, Appius kept proper distance from Julia and any person that was on his way.

  She couldn't stop following him. He was too intriguing. She even had her own theory about the man with empty eyes. Appius had the same kind of eyes like a black mamba: deeply dark brown, almost black, with intimidating, silvery-white sparkles in the pupils. In opposite to the black-mouthed mamba, which gets the ink-black colouration of the inside of its mouth displayed when threatened, it was the colouration of his eyes that tended to get darker, when someone looked at him. She was convinced that Appius could steal souls of men he defeated. He had to inhale them and therefore, his eyes were so effectively meaningless. It was a terrifying idea, and the only calming aspect was her belief that Appius wouldn't hurt her.

  He trained in the yard accompanied by the groovy silence. He fought against an imaginary enemy and it looked demanding and fascinating at the same time. It was like
observing a black mamba. As Julia creeped in his direction to have a better view, he looked at her with his empty, dead eyes and for just a moment, for a tiny moment that wasn't longer than a short breath, he had something friendly in his face. It was worth to be punished for skipping off her tasks just to experience this one particular moment.

  Once, Julia observed once as three, good-built, trained soldiers were delivered to Appius and he didn't say a word. Almost sixty further soldiers in full rig stood and built a square that limited the upcoming battle field in the yard. It was an early evening with the last lightness of the day and lazy, woolly clouds. It was warm and calm. The wind didn't step by. The rain left the piece of Italy single-handed for days. The dust and sand didn't glue to the ground. They felt free to mix with the air, whenever someone went and caused a wave of air molecules. The upright, proud soldiers kept silence. Julia's father stepped on the balcony to look at the match. The three prisoned soldiers stood with a bit of tension. They were armoured, but their hands were bounded. Appius came quickly and the guards let him into the square. Julia had to climb on a tree to see anything and tried to be as silent as possible, just not to attract anyone's attention. She followed the too short moment of the fight.

  Appius simply cut bounds of the prisoned soldiers. His sword was the only protection he had. He wore a simple, red tunica and sandals. The three soldiers got time to warm-up their body parts that gone dead. Appius stood as if he would be a piece of ice or even Hades himself. He waited for the soldiers to attack him. As they did it with common powers, Appius didn't answer at first. He was rather like a frozen sculpture of a warrior. Julia got scared that the offenders will hurt him. She did not breath a word, but she closed shortly her eyes. She didn't want him to die. She gazed again. She already almost saw how the three swords touched Appius's body. Her fingers held the branches so strongly that it was already painful. It was unimportant. Her scream stayed captured in her dried throat and she almost felt down to the ground from panic as she loosened her grasp on the branches. And then, a wonder happened. Appius quickly waved his sword several times. With a short series of swift strikes he wounded and killed his enemies. It looked magically. The offenders fell to the ground like paper soldiers blowed out by the wind. The blood of offenders landed on Appius face and he even did not bat an eye. Julia was sure that it was the moment, when Appius inhaled the souls of the killed men. He stood there and looked peacefully. It was scary, but calming. It meant that Appius was a human. That one time, Appius seemed not to percept Julia's presence. He was so focussed on the three soldiers that he hadn't any further amount of concentration for the surrounding. Julia didn't understand why he killed Romans. As the moment passed by, he left the yard with the same dynamic as usually, as if nothing happened, as if he wouldn't just have killed people. This one occurrence stayed unique.

  Apart from that, Appius limited himself not to injure anyone. A two or three days later, one soldier stepped against Appius again. Appius tried to avoid the fight. He went to the side here and there, just not to get involved into the struggle. He even ignored the fact that the stranger injured his leg above the right knee and the chest twice. Appius didn't get angry, rather sad and resigned as a wild cat that was caught in a cage or that was paralysed by a god. Julia was grieving while looking at Appius, who got wounded and who didn't defend himself. She reminded how good he was and she wondered what curbed him so much that he didn't fight. The young soldier circled around Appius, spoke the entire time and didn't leave Appius any space to breath easily. Julia was hidden behind the bushes – as usually. She tried to have a good view at the yard that bordered with the yard. Julia used any moment to be close to yard, if any soldier was there. She liked to observe how they move with their soldierly, trained dynamic.

  As she saw that Appius felt to the ground by the shoved of the stranger soldier, she jumped out of the bushes and screamed:

  -No!!!

  The stranger wasn't distract by Julia. Instead, he kept gazing at Appius. Julia ran towards Appius, who looked to her. His eyes weren't empty anymore. They were full of... Julia wasn't sure what it was, but it made her feeling so much compassion for him that she would risk her little, tiny life to protect him in front of the stranger, who didn't hurt Appius anymore. Before she achieved the yard, Appius stood up dynamically and swung his sword just once. The young soldier had a long wound along his arm. The blood flew and Julia was scared. Unexpectedly, Appius left the yard and hobbled a bit. The young soldier smiled, while he looked to Julia. He tried not to show his pain. He said twice “It's fine. It's fine.” Julia wasn't sure what he meant. She stood like a monument and looked how the wounded left the yard.

  Of all things, it was the soldier that talked with her a couple days later. His arm was covered by bandages. As he mentioned Appius, he didn't seem to be nerved or annoyed. It was strange that a wounded man didn't speak with rancour.

  -Do you like Appius? - The stranger asked and little Julia shivered as she was taken away from her stream of thoughts.

  She nodded shortly.

  -I like him, too. He is a good man, who experienced a lot. It's hard to explain what happened with him. He'll get better.

  Little Julia didn't understand what the stranger meant in detail. Appius wasn't a man, he was definitely a messenger from gods in her eyes. He had something out of this world in his look.

  -You lost your battle against him, why? - She was cheeky and sweet.

  -I did. Why were you there anyway? - The stranger stunned. She was brave that she interrupted the adverse duel. Additionally, it was impressive that she was do direct and used her words with purpose. She was a child, but she was a smart, interesting child.

  -You lost, because Appius never lose and as his friend, you should have known it better. You shouldn't have played with him, when you knew you weren't going to win the match. - It was unimaginably charming how she avoided answering the question and instead, she directed the topic to the theme that she was interested in.

  -Did you see the execution? - The stranger was curious.

  Julia's face muscles moved and betrayed her lie as she whispered “Of course not”. Her snub nose was wrinkled. Her look was strong.

  -It wasn't an execution. It was a fight. - She said convinced with the overwhelming seriousness of a six or seven year old.

  -It was execution. - Young Hadrian underlined and Julia nodded politely. - He would kill them all, even if there would stand three cohorts. It didn't matter. Appius executed them for his own reasons and with acceptance of us all. - He made a short break and Julia wasn't sure what to do. She was a bit bored, because she couldn't follow his words. - Sometimes, we're surprised by a situation that changes everything and we can't go forward. - Young Hadrian's vice sounded sadly. He made impression of talking with himself that with Julia. - Sometimes, we're captured in malaise and we can't jump out of the whole we're in without a help of our friends. Appius is in such a whole for weeks, months... He needed a strong jerk to be able to do the step that is unimportant to others, but crucial for him. He is a killing machine. He is brilliant, but his soul is lost. He needs to get his soul back.

  Little Julia nodded automatically, but she still didn't follow. She understood that Appius lost his soul and that the young soldier tried to bring Appius his soul back. It was a good intension, however, it was still a riddle for the little Julia why the young soldier injured Appius and – what was more strange – why Appius didn't fight back from the very beginning.

  -You don't fight against your friends though. - She said resentfully. Her world was clear and uncomplicated. A good act was a good act, a bad act was a bad act. Wounding Appius was bad. Helping Appius was good. There was a crack, definitely.

  -You are right, you don't fight against friends. However, in my opinion, each soldier is not only allowed, but obliged to disobey any order he feels might violate human dignity or to support a friend. I wanted to bring him to a point, where he starts moving forward after a twist of fate.

  -How
could you possibly help him, when you fight against him at all? - She couldn't understand, her eye brows frowned.

  -Sometimes, you have to do something that your friends don't like to bring them back on their right track. They don't see it in the moment you act, but they will appreciate it in the future.

  -How do you know that it's the right track? - She was interested and moved closer to him. Her eyes were wide open. Her breath was captured in her lungs. She waited impatiently for his answer.

  -Mostly, you know it. Sometimes, you assume it and you risk it. It's like having a broken leg that didn't grow together properly and when you have to break it anew so that the healing process can start again, but this time properly.

  -I don't like it. - She wasn't convinced. She hadn't a broken leg yet, but her parents warned her that she would get such an injury once, when she climbs trees and falls down. She ignored it with the seriousness of a child that is convinced about being unbeaten until it gets hurts. However, she saw already twice how a slave had to be carried by a medico. It always looked painfully. - I don't like to push anyone to do what you think is right. Everybody should do what everybody wants to do. Don't fight against Appius, if you don't want to lose your arm. And you have to protect yourself better.

  Young Hadrian smiled and was fascinated by her indescribable charm. She correctly noticed that his defence was not good and that his offence was unsuccessful. She truly, rightly and directly underlined that his arm was wounded by Appius. Her cheeky way was simple and sweeping. He liked it.

  As Julius appeared on the horizon, Julia fled behind the stranger's back and hid there successfully.

  -Are we friends? - She whispered.

  -Of course. - Young Hadrian laughed. He couldn't resist to decline her any needed help.

 

  -Good. Don't betray me then, please. - Her childish voice was catching.

  -I won't. - He promised good-humouredly. Indeed, he yelled to Julius to meet in the dining room in a moment.

  Julia's father moved back to the villa and it was strange that he performed a request of anyone. As a proud and influential Roman citizen, he could ignore many questions, begs and demands. Little Julia used the situation to backtrack and to vanish somewhere in the garden. She didn't ask after the stranger's name and she never confirmed meeting anyone in the time that Appius spent in Julius's house.

  At first, as she saw him years later, she recognized him. She noticed the salutations of the soldiers directed to Hadrian. She realized Nerva's bare confusion as she looked at the emperor's face and recognized the soldier she met once. He was right. You always meet twice.

  -And now, you're standing in front of me and you would like to speak up for someone, I guess. - He had the same kind of smile and the same friendly sparkles in his eyes that he had that one day years ago.

  -Are we friends? - She asked quietly, directly and exactly the same way she asked years ago.

  He laughed, because she had the same kind of cheeky sparkles and straight, tensed body as a child.

  -Of course. - He answered with a polite smile. His eyes were vivd and followed her movements.

  -So, you won't kill me.

  -I won't.

  -But it doesn't mean that you won't punish the others.

  -It doesn't, indeed. - He stayed calm.

  -Then, include me to the circle of people you will punish, please.

  She wasn't hiding behind his back as in the summer that passed. She stayed direct and attentive, but there was unknown depth of strength and honour. He sighed aloud and shook his head.

  -You know that I am the emperor and you...

  -I don't care... - She interrupted him immediately. - Do what you think is right.

  -It was brave at first, now, you're acting stupid and hasty. - He said. - You forfeited a chance.

  She kept silence.

  -You love him. I understand.

  She shivered nervously, but didn't say a word. Her cheeks were red and her jugular pulsated with anger.

  -You indeed love him. Does he loves you back?

  She didn't like to accompany him anymore. Raised in a special way, she limited showing her real expression, however, it wasn't possible to hide the tendency of inner emotions.

  -Why do you say such things? - She asked finally bugged.

  He smiled good-humouredly, because he waited for her reaction.

  -Just a woman who loves someone acts the way you act. You came back to save him, even if you are not able to keep a sword or fight against anyone with your small fists. You covered him for a long time, even if you knew that you should report at least to your uncle Cornelius that Maxentius was dead. You love him.

  -So what?! - She yelled helplessly and Hadrian's guards looked suspiciously.

  The emperor moved his head in the way that ordered his guards not to step into the situation. They kept their positions.

  -You can be saved and live.

  She wasn't able to say that living without Marcus Lucius was no option.

  -If you want to kill him, kill me as well. Save Nerva. He's Appius soldier as you were once.

  -Is it your last word? - He asked.

  She nodded.

  -With other words: you don't trust me, anymore? - His doubt wasn't covered by the polite tone. He seemed to be disappointed, even if he smiled. His eyes were full of the same kind of friendliness as usually. - I expected you to be disbelieving. You should trust me as you did once.

  He sent her back to the chamber where she spent the last night. She thought he was the same bastard as her father. This time, she hadn't any possibility to hide behind a friendly back. He wanted to keep her calm while fighting against her friends or people, who were crucial for her. He already injured Appius once. How ironic it sounded to trust him, if there were no signs to do it?

  As she was called for a supper in the evening, she didn't like to go. She was forced by rather impolite messengers. They poked her regardlessly not used to interact with women. She thought she could at least chose a less comfortable and unsuitable dress, get cold, then get seriously sick and die. She stunned as she saw Marcus Lucius during at the table. She didn't expect it. She wasn't sure whether pretending not to care about him would change anything.

  As the dinner passed by, Julia was sent to her new chamber. She didn't like it and she noticed how Marcus Lucius stood up immediately to help her. His hands were bound. Hadrian showed him to relax and sit down.

  -I give you my word that she won't get hurt, nor today, not tomorrow, never.

  Marcus Lucius sat unhurriedly down and showed Julia to leave without making problems. She shuffled unmotivated and accompanied by three soldiers and by looks of all other men that had to stay in the room. At first, as she left the scene, Hadrian sent Pompeius away and showed Marcus Lucius to stand up. Protracting the evening seemed to be the new entertainment remedy.

  -Follow me, Marcus Lucius. - The emperor asked quietly.

  The yard wasn't warm, but the first breath of spring was included in the air. It was the wind of change, an announcement of things coming to an end and things that could get started. Hadrian was delighted by the dim light and the warm, dry breeze. It was a day without rain, one of the rare moments, when you could start loving Britannia. Hadrian smiled minimally. He kept silence for a long while. Marcus Lucius didn't say a word, either. He waited patiently. The evening seemed not to get any end.

  -If you had to chose whether you fight for this girl or having your revenge on the man, who betrayed you, which option would you chose? - Hadrian asked directly, unexpectedly and observed Marcus Lucius's reaction with a calm face expression.

  Hadrian's guards, who stayed in the background, moved minimally, nervously, because Marcus Lucius's body showed refusal. They weren't satisfied with Hadrian's decision to stay in direct proximity to a man, who was dangerous even without any weapon. Marcus Lucius could kill anyone with bare hands, if it was needed. The guards were tensed and heard already reports related to the battle and to the trainings
that Marcus Lucius organized before. They didn't feel comfortable with Hadrian being so close to a man without chains on his hands. Hadrian was apparently careless of danger. It wasn't wise and it was unusual for him to act so unwarily.

  At once, Marcus Lucius was maximally tensed. Everyone could see his every muscle waiting to be used properly as an arrow awaited to be finally shot from a arch. He wasn't sure which girl Hadrian meant: Decima or Julia? The way or another, he was internally sputter with increasing rage coming out of the deepest corner of his head. The feeling of being betrayed was strong, it broke the balance of well-being and security in Marcus Lucius's mind and it influenced him emotionally. Then, missing Decima decreased in the last weeks, but putting the emotions related to Decima under the surface of consciousness was needed to survive, to escape from the surreal world without her. The extreme sourness caught him mostly at nights, when he woke up alone and there was nobody on his side. In the very first moment after such sudden, bitter awakening, he wasn't sure in which part of his life he was. He asked himself whether Julia was just a dream that he dreamt to overwrite the moving memory of Decima's cold, bloody, immovable corpse. He tried then to calm down and lied to himself that Decima was still waiting for him, somewhere in the afterlife, after he revenged her painful death. It gave him a kind of peaceful mind, but it increased his need of fulfilling the obligation. He wished to meet Decima the day he would die. He wished to see her smile that he etched in his mind from the very first time he saw her.

  Hadrian respected Marcus Lucius's self-control. The emperor didn't expect so much command of oneself. He wondered whether he would be able to keep his emotions so masterfully limited and apart from his own actions. Hadrian already experienced a lot. He was born as son of the maternal cousin of Trajan, who named Hadrian emperor shortly before dying. Trajan's wife, Pompeia Plotina, confirmed it as she came to Hadrian with the same grace and sympathy mixed with sad, mourning eyes. There were enough Romans, who didn't like the new emperor and evaluated plots against Hadrian. The new emperor didn't feel well anywhere he was, therefore, he travelled a lot. He visited nearly every province of the Empire, because travelling allowed him to feel good. He spent extremely much time with soldiers. He liked staying with them even during meals. It made him feel ordinary and he knew where his place was. There, around his boys, he didn't feel obligated to prove anything. He wanted to show a good example. He trained and drilled himself the same way the others needed to do it. He used to be more rigorous to himself than to others, and his soldiers appreciated his self-control and modesty. Therefore, as he found the similar kind of self-command in Marcus Lucius's behaviour, he could understand the enforced way Marcus Lucius lived. For Hadrian, it was somewhat like looking on his own person from two steps aside. It was like stepping out of his body without slamming any doors of his soul that was enforced to be emperor. He took the change of life brought by his fate with dignity and honour. Therefore, he tried to minimize his own needs in the name of something bigger, more important and more valuable than just he, one individual that could express the most quiet wish and it would become real. Knowing the power of his wishes, he gave voice just to things that he analysed before.

  Sometimes, in situations of increasing stress, he thought about the so called blood rain, the rain carrying sand from deserts. He liked remembering the rain falling down with reddish colour. When the rain drops dried off with a thin layer of dust, the special dust whipped up by winds and mix with the moisture in clouds got stretched then on houses, wagons and plants in gardens. Dust movement overstepped the borders and brought the blood rain even to Britannia every now and then. Hadrian missed it in that moment. It would make the tensed situation more tolerable, more poetic. Even without any Greek dramaturge, the air was taut that you could almost cut it into little, hectic pieces and portion for further days and weeks.

  Hadrian moved his head and gazed at Marcus Lucius. It was the time to tease the soldier. The game was not over, so the next move had to be done.

  -You're not sure which girl I mean? - Hadrian was just few meters away and could be easily attacked by Marcus Lucius. However, Marcus Lucius didn't move any millimetre, even if it looked impossible to tame the enormous energy captured in the amount of his all cells and making him look dangerously in general. His eyes were focused on Hadrian, even if he had other things in mind. He analysed every possible, real development of the situation. He never gave up the thought of achieving both goals, therefore, his task was complicated and harder to fulfil.

  The already nervously awaiting space shivered minimally like a spider's web, when a fly gets trapped there. Soldiers were ready to fight. Emperor was ready to decode without looking at Marcus Lucius's struggle. Everyone observed impatiently the man in the middle of the limited yard and they knew that this peaceful situation could change extremely within a blink of an eye. Hadrian stepped back a millimetre. Suddenly, Marcus Lucius moved.

  Even if Marcus Lucius didn't keep the sword in his hand correctly, he was armoured at once. Hadrian was shocked by the very fast change of situation to the disadvantage of the emperor. Marcus Lucius laid his fingers on the grasp of Hadrian's sword. Marcus Lucius was trained good enough to attack successfully within less than seconds. Hadrian nodded with respect and didn't show any sign of fear.

  -What do you plan now? - Hadrian asked politely. He was really curious what Marcus Lucius was going to do.

  -We're going back to the dining room. Call for Julia. - Marcus Lucius's words were straight, fast and emotionless as his moves.

  Hadrian followed further, very specific orders of Marcus Lucius. They were predefined and minimized the chances for Hadrian. The disadvantage was still on the emperor's side. Therefore, the soldiers hadn't any opportunity to win back their reign over the situation. The soldiers on his right side stepped aside and an unexpected passage occurred. Marcus Lucius didn't move his head into that direction, but he noticed the difference of the lineup. Marcus Lucius moved cautiously and the same was expected from the emperor. Marcus Lucius didn't let himself to be distracted, even when he saw Julia at the end of the human corridor. As he looked to Hadrian, his look wasn't insecure, rather more determined.

  Julia made insecure, limping steps and both Hadrian and Marcus Lucius noticed that her condition wasn't the best. At first, she got cold and faint face. Then, her erstwhile injured leg could be easily recognized. The difference in walking was huge. She hobbled and faltered a bit.

  Hadrian seemed to be waiting passionately, impatiently for any bodily, visible reaction of Marcus Lucius, but nothing happened. Not even one muscle struggled more or less. Marcus Lucius had the same concentrated look and the same emotionless face expression. Unfortunately, the emperor wasn't able to look directly into Marcus Lucius's eyes. He would find there the wished sign of emotion. The sparkles of sorrow and concern played vividly with each other. She stepped closer and closer, but she wasn't fast. She was rather like a ship drifting unpowered on a calm sea. The lines of soldiers built the immovable edges of her road. Her body shivered due to the low temperature in the room. She wore still the same, inappropriate summer dress and had no blanket or anything that could warm her up around. She looked tired and wiped out. The emperor felt indeed compassion for the girl and was ashamed that she became involved into the scene, but it was necessary to finish the intended test. At the same time, Hadrian seemed to wonder about the lack of reaction in Marcus Lucius's body and in the moment, he wanted to give an order to his guards, Marcus Lucius pulled Julia hastily, surprisingly to his back. Soldiers weren't able to react on his movement. The girl wasn't sure what he intended, but she let him to change her position as he needed.

  Suddenly, Julia was behind him, just few millimetres away from him. Hadrian was still in front of Marcus Lucius's chest, in the direct sight. Marcus Lucius could percept Julia's breath on his back and her feverish warmth along his body. He noticed that she still trembled, but stayed motionless like a sculpture of Pantheon. Hadrian gazed with mixed feelings. He was as fla
bbergasted as his soldiers. They grasped their swords and took the defence position. The entire, already tensed situation became even more dangerous. It could escalate any minute. It was like playing with a gas lighter in a warehouse full of grenades and dynamite. It was like a tensed scene from a black-white movie, where brave men try to transport nitroglycerine through mountains.

  -If it will be needed, he'll kill us all. It's not our goal. Put your swords down. - Hadrian spoke after a moment of general silence, when a big question mark hung in the air.

  It wasn't predictable what could happen next. Until now, there were few persons able to move so fast and nimbly like Marcus Lucius. The remark of Hadrian sounded serious, even very serious. The emperor knew that he was supposed to bring back the piece of peace in this room.

  -Put your swords down. - Hadrian repeated and his soldiers followed the order, even if their faces didn't show any sign of acceptance.

  Marcus Lucius took a deeper, relieving breath. Julia shivered. Hadrian didn't smile.

  -You'll go back to where you were lately. - Marcus Lucius said and Hadrian knew that it was directed to Julia.

  Hadrian wasn't able to see how she reacted. It was frustrating.

  -No! I won't go without you... - She whispered sadly, desperately as she touched his left arm that didn't hold the sword.

  -You'll go, because you promised me once to do what is needed. Go.

  Marcus Lucius's voice was like real steel. It cut the air like a sword cuts skin. However, his voice included a calm, warm shadow. It showed that Marcus Lucius wasn't a simple machine. He was a human that made his decision. He wanted to be sure that the girl will get in a safe place and first then, he could go and have his vengeance on the man, who betrayed him. Hadrian respected the intend and the realisation.

  -Stop. - Hadrian said in the moment as hobbling Julia was going to mount the horse in the yard. She was limping a bit, even if she tried to cover it. The effort would bring her additional pain and Hadrian didn't like to torture her. - You passed the first test.

  Julia turned to Hadrian with surprise on her face and checked what Marcus Lucius was thinking about it. However, Marcus Lucius wasn't stunning. He wasn't amused either. His face was hard to read, even for the girl. There was nothing to get any trace of what he had in mind.

  -A test? - He asked finally embittered, but quietly. He didn't lose the sword, but he lost the overview of the situation. He couldn't derive anything from what he heard. - A test?! - He repeated his question clearly louder.

  Hadrian smiled sadly and docile. His soldiers took a defence position, so he turned around and showed with his hands to stay calm. There was need to fight. There was no need to take Marcus Lucius as a prisoner.

  -Soldiers, please, leave us alone. - Hadrian said suddenly and everyone stunned. - Julia, be so kind and stay here, if you wish. Marcus Lucius, let's talk.

  Hadrian's tone was clear and determined. Marcus Lucius wasn't sure how to react so he waited until the legionnaires left the room without their swords and without any comment or question spoken aloud, even if their faces showed the perfect opposition to complete approval. They didn't wonder about the order, but they weren't happy about it. Probably, they experienced such risky habits of the young emperor already and didn't question his will. As the soldiers left, a kind of easing fulfilled the space. There was more air to breathe. However, Marcus Lucius stayed tensed the same way he was before. It had to be extremely exhausting for him to stay focussed for such a long while. Nor his breath nor his eyes betrayed the effort he needed to invest into positioning himself in this way. His eyes struggled who to look at. He looked at the emperor, then at Julia, then again at Hadrian.

  Within a few steps, Marcus Lucius appeared next to Julia and gave her the footing with his shoulder. She leant on him in the way that didn't cause much pressure on her left leg. She was hot due to the cold she caught. She was tired and nerved. Marcus Lucius felt that she wished it all to be over. As she stood proudly as usually, he looked again to Hadrian and followed the emperor's slow, but fluent moves.

  -You're undecided. It means, you have something or someone to lose. Is it your honour, or is it the life of Julia, or is it about all your friends? - Hadrian thought aloud, turned here and there, but with purpose: slowly and predictably. - You are a good soldier and you've changed the soldiers in the way I wished to have them. That makes you a honourable man. They would follow you wherever you would go. They've noticed that you're a man that is worth to follow. That makes you an extraordinary man... You covered your friends to protect them from consequences and you didn't avoid the punishment. That makes you a reliable man. However, it all makes you a dangerous man. What makes you a man that I can trust?

  Marcus Lucius was full of emotions. He was full of rage, bitterness, disturbance and... hope. He hoped that it all could end in a good way, whatever the gods might define as good. He was sure that his own vision of a good end was not the same as the real end, but he hadn't any high approaches. His life wasn't crucial. Then, he noticed that Hadrian had enough chances to kill anyone of them. Marcus Lucius was sure that the emperor had a plan and it included the living version of Marcus Lucius. The testing part was needed to decide what to do next. One crucial assumption was fixed: Hadrian promised not to hurt Julia at all. There was something that could complete a puzzle, but what Marcus Lucius didn't notice yet.

  -What makes you a man that I can trust? - Hadrian asked again and focussed on Marcus Lucius. There was a special amount of patience and support in that look.

  -He didn't kill you and he could do it easily. - Julia threw the statement quickly, insecure, but loud enough to attract the attention of both men. She felt the tensed muscles on Marcus Lucius's arm and in his straight position. She didn't like him to be so watchful and focussed.

  -She's right. You didn't kill me and you had enough chances. - Hadrian confirmed with a voice that was nor polite nor friendly nor nervous. Definitely, it was a different tone compared to the tone Hadrian used in a moment before.

  -You didn't kill me either. - Marcus Lucius added and wasn't sure what game did they play. He didn't recognize the rules and wasn't feel comfortable about the situation. Sure was the fact that he passed a test. It wasn't sure how many further test were planned and what had to be proved.

  Julia seemed to get it finally. She smiled and Hadrian got the sparkle of relief in her eyes. Before she said a word, the emperor shook his head to show her to keep silence.

  -He has to find it out himself. - The emperor was strict and direct.

  Marcus Lucius felt like an alien. Nothing made sense anymore and he was the only one who didn't get what was going on. Wrinkles appeared on his forehead. He looked shortly at Julia and noticed her shivering lips that showed a kind of minimal smile. He looked at Hadrian, but the emperor didn't appear the way that allowed to make it out. Additional portion of disbelief and concern caught Marcus Lucius with its imaginary hands smothering his throat.

  -Good, you need to rest. You both have to rest. - Hadrian underlined his second statement. - We won't talk today. We'll talk tomorrow.

  Marcus Lucius made a wry face. He wanted to clear the situation ahead. A stitch in time saves nine.

  -There is no time like the present. - Marcus Lucius said and waited for Hadrian's reaction.

  The emperor seemed to be confused. Finally, he decided to resolve at least a part of his plans:

  -You have to know that tomorrow won't be easy for you. - Hadrian spoke calmly, slowly. - Julius Fabius comes to visit you. Your mother will appear, too. I invited them and they were waiting in Londonium under Pompeius's oversight. - Hadrian observed how Marcus Lucius's forehead got further wrinkles. Even a big question mark won the place between his eyes and above his nose. Hadrian smiled, because he achieved the goal he intended. - Don't be worried. They're coming here to participate in your wedding, not your execution.

  -No execution?... - Marcus Lucius stunned.

  Julia breathed twice loudly, with relief. Marcus
Lucius was almost sure that he would have to catch her fainting body. However, she gathered all her powers to stay upright on her own and limited taking help by steading herself on his bent arm. They looked as a couple in front of an altar during a wedding rehearsal.

  -I thought it would be an appreciate reward to give you your identity back. You earned it in the last months. You kept order here properly. You won a fight for the empire. You made friends with the local inhabitants... The republic needs such men as you, who looked at what ought to be done, not to the reputation which would follow by the acts. By the acts, your fame will rise and your contribution and attitude won't be forgotten quickly... And then again, it would be silly to take your life, if he empire can profit from your further contribution.

  Marcus Lucius thought he was dreaming. It was impossible and unbelievable. He gazed at the emperor, who explained shortly the background of his actions. Marcus Lucius sat down on the floor, because he wasn't able to listen to such improbable occurrences and keeping his straight position. Julia stayed just few centimetres away with her hand laid on his back, but she didn't dare to move, because she didn't like to interrupt anything.

  -You seem to be much more under a strain due to the fact that your life won't be taken than due the upcoming wedding. Some say that it's the same case. - Hadrian laughed shortly. Except him, nobody found it funny, so he coughed awkwardly.

  Julia kept standing like a statue. Marcus Lucius raised his head higher and asked quietly, coldly:

  -What further contribution do you mean?

  Hadrian smiled as if he was waiting just for that moment for years.

  -That's a topic I would like to discuss with you later. It depends on how you react tomorrow or the day after tomorrow.

  Marcus Lucius gazed without understanding what Hadrian meant. Was it about Julia and the wedding? Was it about Julia's father? Was it about his mother? What could be so decisive to influence the emperor's plans towards Marcus Lucius?

  -Before I leave you alone I have to tell you two short stories. Both stories have no happy end. Both stayed unsolved over the years and you can influence how they end up. - Hadrian said. It sounded sadly, almost as if the emperor was intimidated or repressed by the thought for a longer while.

  Marcus Lucius listened attentively, motionless. Julia breathed deeply, sibilantly. Hadrian went here and there. He talked freely, even if not aloud. With the time, he sat down at the table and drank wine while making small pauses. He knew that he influenced the range of information of Marcus Lucius and Julia extremely. Hadrian did it with purpose. It was the last time he had to put Marcus Lucius to the proof, before the routine could come back.

  The emperor summarized a story that included many smaller occurrences that could be bounded into one with the same principle as single threads interlaced together can look like a sweater with different, complicated patterns.

  For Hadrian, it all began as he met Appius. Appius was a very open, friendly person. Appius used to talk a lot. It was years ago and for anyone, who knew Appius currently, it was impossible to imagine that Appius could be that way. It was like trying to imagine how your great-great-grandfather looked like when he was three years old, if you know his only photography taken in the time, when he was old, wrinkled, and shortly before he died.

  Hadrian remembered Appius and enjoyed the thought to have him as a personal trainer. Unfortunately, between the time, when Appius was full of beans, and the time, when he met Hadrian for the second time, a very bad, ugly and terrible occurrence took place. Appius lost his best friend, Maximus. As Hadrian saw Appius mourning, it was a visible sign that the world has changed irreversibly. It was impossible to accompany Appius in those days. Some weeks were spent in the villa of Julius Fabius. Hadrian wondered later a couple of times how calculated Julius Fabius was and how clever and perfectly he camouflaged it...

  At first, Hadrian didn't believe in the conspiracy theory that Appius shared with Hadrian once. Hadrian was far, far away from being an emperor one day and Appius was drunk and injured after a duel they had. It happened during the one, summer evening after the day that Julia remembered, when Hadrian listened to a rare confession and quiet analysis of Appius. For years, Appius tried to find out who was standing behind the murder of Maximus, because he felt obligated to solve the riddle that desolated Appius over the years. Already few weeks after Maximus's death, Hadrian traced three soldiers, who poisoned wine of Maximus. Hadrian delivered them to Appius, who killed them quickly and afterwards, he regretted it. Increasingly, Appius wished to prolong their suffering. A quick, soldierly death was an extreme blessing and a huge mistake. Unfortunately, nor Appius nor Hadrian could find out who was the master of puppets. Over the years, Appius managed to calm down and train further generations of soldiers. However, he never came back to the open, kind nature he once had. Hadrian thought that it was the biggest loss in the sequence of consequences after Maximus's murder. Hadrian thought that one and a half men were dashed out of this world and that a part of Appius's soul was already in the afterlife.

  Years passed by and Appius's fever to catch the murderer of his best friend seem to fade away for uninvolved people. His friends knew that somewhere, in the corner of his mind and his heart, there was still the need to fix what happened and to get his revenge, but the traces didn't bring him to any further, worthy place. Instead, he limited himself in the social life and spent his time mostly with his own, picked circle of soldiers. He avoided anyone, who could remind him about the tragic occurrence, even through own presence.

  Years passed by and Hadrian became an emperor. He needed support in the south of the empire. He needed support in the north of the empire. He had a hand full of trusted leaders and masses of so-called friends, who waited for any moment to take over the power. As he called for Appius to get a helpful hand in the southern regions around the Mediterranean Sea, Appius appeared quickly, but with the same kind of unsettlement in his eyes that Hadrian knew from the time directly after Maximus's death. There was a new, specific shade of concern in Appius eyes that included a kind of hope. Having hope in Maximus's case would mean that the murderer was detected and could be punished. Appius spent enough time with analysing what specific torture could last terrifically long and bring wildly much pain. However, it couldn't be derived to Maximus anymore, because a mention of Appius's best friend caused the same retreat in Appius's eyes as always. Hadrian needed a couple of days to combine the single threads made out thoughts dainty as proteinaceous spider silk. Hadrian was toddling as a spider that could not cross by crawling some gaps between objects and needed to drift on the faintest breeze across a gap to stick to a surface at the far end. The spider would then reel in and tighten the first strand, then carefully walk along it and strengthen it with a further threads until the thread is strong enough to support the rest of the web. Hadrian proceed the same way. He had some assumptions and drifted between the possibilities. He checked the signals that he got from Appius and if Hadrian recognized that he was on the right patch, he probed Appius more targeted. Finally, it didn't take long to get out of Appius what occupied the mind and soul of the best trainer in the empire. As Hadrian was completing step by step the story about Maximus's son, Hadrian noticed that it reminded Appius about the time that he wanted to have behind him. Hadrian recognized that Appius combined his supportiveness for Marcus Lucius with Maximus, but Maximus stayed in the background of that issue. The sparkles of hope suggested that Appius was convinced that Marcus Lucius will proceed in the right way, whatever it could mean. There was just one simple question that Hadrian asked Appius at the end, when all puzzles known by Appius were unfolded as in the moment, when a player of a trick-taking game has to show own cards:

  -Are you sure that Marcus Lucius is a good man?

  What Appius didn't know was the reason that brought Marcus Lucius out of his lines. That made Hadrian curious. A good man acts in a good way, so if someone like Marcus Lucius leaves the army and goes to the underground, then there had to be a ver
y important matter that he got involved into more or less freely. Hadrian followed the trace and found out that Marcus Lucius was in Rome shortly. The emperor raised further questions. For which reason? For how long? Whom did Marcus Lucius visit? It all was unsurprisingly related with Decima, who got killed mysteriously. Hadrian asked himself whether the precocious death of the young, healthy woman was just an aspect in a big picture or whether it was one, independent matter. It pushed Hadrian to dig deeper in the case and to send more trustful scouts. As Hadrian found out the truth behind it, his world felt a bit apart.

  While Hadrian talked, he observed Marcus Lucius's reaction. Just the mentioning Decima made the young soldier sad, even with the generous support of Julia. Marcus Lucius didn't make any impression of being the murderer. He rather looked like a man, who was still willing to get his vengeance. It was the same kind of sparkle that Hadrian saw already in Appius's eyes, when Appius contemplated about the punishment options for Maximus's killer.

  Then, Hadrian summarized how he followed the moves of Marcus Lucius in Britannia, among all by listening to Appius's reports about the current state in Eboracum and reports from Quintus about progress of condition and training in the camp. Hadrian wanted to meet personally the man, who was betrayed by the closest surrounding. He wanted to see whether Marcus Lucius was really that special and skilled.

  -Now, I know that everything I've heard about you was true. Fame speeds by, but your name won't be forgotten soon. - The emperor said and it was impossible to detect what he intended to communicate. The message sounded as a dangerously announcement.

  Then, the emperor said that on his own way full of visits in different camps in the entire empire, Eboracum was marked as the most curious place in the world. Knowing that Julia, the charming daughter of Julius Fabius, was there, too, made the place even more special. Hadrian wanted to see how the brave, intelligent, feisty girl grown up and whether she beheld her special nature. Seeing how good Marcus Lucius and Julia acted to support each other confirmed Hadrian's decision to give them the chance to be able to act together officially.

  -You both proved that you not only act with courage and honour, but in love to each other. Therefore, on my personal wish, I arranged the wedding. Indeed, your parents are not involved in the plan. I called for them to celebrate together the Vestales, a feast for Vesta, the virgin goddess of the hearth, home, and family. I thought it was appropriate enough to give them just a hint the same way they left me hints to their acts. They weren't able to decline my polite wish.

  Hadrian smiled wry and awkward. It was directed nor to Julia nor Marcus Lucius, rather to the upcoming visitors. Marcus Lucius wondered about the order from the road. It meant that Hadrian had a plan long before he appeared in Eboracum. Hadrian's plan was based on a row of probable assumptions about Marcus Lucius. It included among all Appius's word that Marcus Lucius was a good man. The rest was unknown to Marcus Lucius. Hadrian wasn't disappointed by the news brought by different chessmen with different backgrounds confirmed Appius's statement. In opposite, he was more than pleased to be confirmed step after step about the right direction he has chosen and which limited the range of risk he had to took under consideration. Stimulating and subjecting Marcus Lucius directly and by arranged situations showed Hadrian that the world included good, reliable men that he needed to keep the policy of peace. He wished to be known as a good emperor, not a tyrant.

  Then, Hadrian smiled friendly in the way that he mostly did. He thought about the symbolic meaning of choosing the date, but he was aware that the family chains won't stay bounded properly forever, if the truth would come out. It was needed to solve the riddles once for all times as it was needed to burn piece of Marcus Lucius's chest. Hadrian was excited and inconveniently nervous about the day they all should meet in one place at one time. He had to know that he could rely on Marcus Lucius and Julia the same way that Hadrian trusted Appius or Pompeius. Therefore, summarizing the entire situation to the both crucial players was so important. Hadrian didn't feel disappointed by Marcus Lucius or Julia. They acted differently from what Hadrian's expectation was, but it was all justifiable afterwards. The most valuable task was still in front of Hadrian. He wanted Marcus Lucius to trust him. There was no way to force anyone to trust. It wasn't a medicine that could be swallowed or an act that could be realized. It was a process that had to be developed and the time didn't belong to the highly available goods.

  Hadrian ended his monologue and left the room. Marcus Lucius didn't even try to detain him in any way. Instead, Marcus Lucius sat on the cold, stoned ground and hid his face in his hands. Julia came down to him and flattened herself against his backs. He wasn't armoured and therefore, he felt her warm body. She knew that it wasn't the time to talk, but the time to come to terms with own soul.

  Marcus Lucius tried to stay emotionless while he tried to order correctly the hints he got. The entire story infuriated him. He didn't ask for so much data at once. It felt as if Jupiter would take him from Eboracum and leave awkwardly in the desert of Africa. Marcus Lucius got too many answers at once and they let to a lot of new questions that stayed unsolved. Suddenly, he had too many opportunities to handle in the close future. Fait accompli wasn't a good remedy to push his mood upwards. At the same time, Hadrian's assumptions and knowledge enlightened the big puzzle enormously.

  Feeling Julia's chest on his back was the only calming thing. She breathed slowly. It took deeply felt eternity and for real a couple of hours before Marcus Lucius ordered the news in his head, before he could start acting in any way again, before he won back a piece of ground under his feet. It took years he needed to ordered it emotionally. His world lost the perspective. He felt like Alice falling down the whole. Everything around him twisted and was mixed from the bottom to the top and from the top to the bottom. His ground has been shaky for weeks. However, it started breaking apart irreplaceably, irreversibly like a piece of glass that catches a crack that gets bigger, and bigger, and bigger, and finally, it was falling apart into millions of pieces ending at the simplest atomic structure of every element. Marcus Lucius was like iron that used to be harder than bronze, but it became brittle. Compared to the morning as he woke up, the future was more insecure than he thought and the past didn't mean what he thought it meant earlier. The only and just temporarily constant point of his own, galactic coordinate system was Julia, whose chest glued to his back. It was the only perceptible touch of reality he was captured in.

  He focussed on the information he got from the emperor. His own father, Maximus, and his own wife, Decima, were killed independently from each other. Their common denominator was being a pawn in a complicated, studied plan of persons that Hadrian didn't specify directly. Still, Marcus Lucius knew that it was about issues of at least one of the invited guests. There had to be a special background for the invitation to Eboracum for Marcus Lucius's mother and for Julius Fabius. It couldn't be just simply the announced celebration or even the wedding.

  Marcus Lucius knew that Maximus created something that was widely known as “Maximus's men”. Appius belonged to the group as the best man on the side of Maximus. It was a mark that could be compared with seal of approval, a coherent set of standards and specifications for extraordinary trained and skilled soldiers. They were better than the yeomanry and started to be compared even with Achilles's Myrmidons like Menesthius, Eudorus, Peisander, Phoenix and Alcimedon. Menesthiuss As Maximus felt to the ground, a news spread the Ancient world that the one, who was supposed to be almost a god, almost the reborn Achilles, was a soldier at the end of the day. His students and friends straggled and lost their unity. At first Appius connected the rests of them a couple years later and Appius's soldiers started to be percepted similarly to the group around Maximus. However, it was just a reflected light of fame that Maximus earned once. Appius was like the Moon with its greyish volcanic rocks that are actually not very reflective and which reflects only about ten percent of the sunlight that hits it. But the Sun is so bright that even th
is much reflection looks very bright to us. The fame of Maximus was still alive and Appius's soldiers were known as reliable, honourable, skilled soldiers, not god-like warriors who could win all fights of the empire. Executing Maximus changed the pattern of distribution of power significantly. There were many different people from the first ranks of politics, who were interested in the fall of Maximus and there were enough supporters, who were disadvantaged by such a change of relations of power.

  The insecurity of whom to trust was the crucial point. However, the revolutionary character of information wasn't surprising. Marcus Lucius assumed already that there had to be a master of puppets, who influenced the sequence of occurrences. However, Marcus Lucius's assumptions didn't include any of the invited guests. He knew for sure that Quintus was one of the chessmen. Marcus Lucius remembered how Quintus announced killing of Decima and how Quintus's men were ordered to execute Marcus Lucius, too. There was a gap between Quintus and his probable supporters. Marcus Lucius analysed which reasons Quintus could possibly have to act the way he acted. It couldn't be simply about a lost game. It would be ridiculous. With whom or by whose order Quintus acted was unknown. Connecting Quintus with Marcus Lucius's mother was strange.

  Raised in the house of his mother, Marcus Lucius knew that she was a beastly, cold-minded person. Was she able to order to kill Maxentius? She didn't like Decima, but was it a reason to extinguish a life? Marcus Lucius's mother was eager for fame and fortune, but she wouldn't act in the way that disadvantages her only son. Was she then involved into Maximus's killing? Which reasons could she follow to decide or support to kill her own husband? What could killing Maximus bring to Julius Fabius? How could Julia's father be involved into one of the matters? Marcus Lucius didn't have a chance to meet Julius Fabius personally, therefore, he wasn't sure what kind of person Julia's father is. Then, it wasn't sure what to think about Hadrian. Was he a good person that tried to help? Was he a trustful person? Was he just playing with Marcus Lucius and feed Marcus Lucius with some more or less true traces that should lead to a full trust, and change Marcus Lucius to a puppet? Was the announcement about the wedding just a kind of last meal for Marcus Lucius, who was condemned to death? Was is just an attempt to defraud the reality and direct Marcus Lucius to do actions? On which side would Julia stay, when it comes to the point of no return? The crucial question was whom to trust. Marcus Lucius was sure that he had no confidence, no overview, no influence on the situation.

  Marcus Lucius avoided the big politics, because he wanted to live his ordinary life. However, the powerful, aggressive politics used to have bearing on influencing lives of people it needs unmindful of damages and consequences that involving anyone could cause. Within a couple of months, Marcus Lucius became unwillingly a chess piece in the hands of regardless politicians on the chess board of fate. Winning him for own ranks could decide who would win a running match. Marcus Lucius recognized already that Hadrian intended to earn trustful, loyal relationship, but there was no interstage of trust. It was a simple state: whether you trust someone or you don't excluding a special fraction of trust. Marcus Lucius knew that the emperor wouldn't tolerate any disloyal soldier in his ranks. Relying on anyone wasn't easy in this situation and in meant taking sides. Marcus Lucius relied on Appius, but Appius relied on Hadrian. Rules of reciprocity as a behaviour or transitive relation that suggests partial order relations and equivalence relations didn't suit here. Human relationships weren't as easy as simple mathematical syntaxes sponsored by letters A, B and X as well the Equal Sign. Matching a symbol letter to every known person and every possible, but unknown variable was useless in the analysis of single threads made out thoughts dainty as proteinaceous spider silk and powerful enough to lead to a cold-blooded murders.

  Any decision to take sides definitely fixed the new order on the chess board. The game included rational obsessions of winning power and fame, but also emotional aspects as faith in a person or idea. Marcus Lucius trusted Julia and Nerva, even if his mind could find enough reasons not to trust them. It was unimportant for his soul. The rest of the world was beyond his limits of trust. The shaky ground under his feet felt completely apart and nothing was the way he knew it before. He had to gather his pieces anew and make a decision. Even a bad decision would be better than malaise of the moment. He had to settle his position by instincts the same way he acted on the battle field. However, during battles, he knew who was on his side and who wasn't. Here, it was like jumping out of a cliff and hoping that you miss the rocks under the water surface.

  Marcus Lucius wasn't sure who was finally responsible for which murder and which reasons were needed to even start forging such plans. Creating the wild combinations wasn't helpful and it just annoyed the mind. Every imaginable option appeared surreal and improbable. Hadrian definitely knew the solutions to all questions that grind Marcus Lucius's mind down. Marcus Lucius was supposed to search for his own way to find out the truth and to decide whom to trust. The facts were that Maximus, Decima and Maxentius were dead. Their lives were over. Their souls were somewhere in the afterlife. The rest could be a dainty, complex masterpiece web made out of lies and illusions, where the unidentified masters dragged the subtly threads.

  Julia shivered. Her forehead was glowing. Marcus Lucius turned to her and as he hugged her feverish body, he was totally sure of what he felt towards her. He would kill the entire world, if it would be needed to protect her. He loved her. It was so clearly, naively simple. It was the only truth he could find and take for sure in the moment.

  -Julia... - He whispered.

  She moved, but wasn't completely concentrated. Her eyes were glassy, sleepy and tired. Her body was supple and less stable. If Marcus Lucius wouldn't steady her, she would fall down on the floor. A shy smile appeared on her face and it looked like she was remembering something from her past. She didn't catch the attentive, sorrowed gaze of Marcus Lucius.

  -Appius said once that the one, who can murder, is also obviously able to save a life... He laughed. He found it funny, but in a strange way. - She memorized the days from her childhood as she observed mourning Appius. She thought about a venomous snake that could kill its victims within seconds.

  Her forehead was hot. Sweat showed up on her skin. Marcus Lucius got scared that it was more than just a common cold. He lifted her and brought through the halls to tepidarium. No soldier was in sight. No slave appeared on Marcus Lucius's way. Apparently, there was no need to keep an eye at Marcus Lucius. It was an extraordinary change compared to the last days.

  As he laid her on a wooden cot in a cosily warm room, she opened her eyes. She looked tired and sick.

  -How are you doing? - He asked as she smiled minimally with glowing eyes.

  -It's nothing. - She whispered the same way he always told he got scratches.

  -Fair enough. - He answered while he covered her with a blanket. Earlier, he judged that it had to be a common cold that usually resolves in seven to ten days, with some symptoms lasting up longer. These infections have been with humanity since antiquity and for ages, there was no cure discovered. Marcus Lucius knew that the symptoms could be treated conservatively by getting plenty of rest, drinking fluids to maintain hydration, and gargling with warm salt water. However, the temperature of her forehead scared him.

  -I will try to fix you. - He said melodically, a bit bothered, and added after a moment a question. - Anything I should know about the days out there?

  -Nothing. - She answered quickly, because she didn't like to describe the days in the cottage. She wouldn't be able to lie about her good mood in those days and she knew that Marcus Lucius needed a moment of rest. - Anything I should know about your days here?

  She breathed heavily, but didn't cough. Her dreamy eyes observed how he gently laid down next to her. He pulled her slightly to his body and minded not to destroy the dainty creation of the blanket covering the girl.

  -Nothing. - He stroked her hair and kissed her hot forehead twice. It wouldn't be supportive to describe
the days spent as a prisoner.

  -What do we plan to do then? - She asked as his breath became slowly again.

  A wry, forced smile appeared on his face. Julia didn't see it, but she felt the crooked mood that enveloped him. Her question was tricky, because there was no simple answer for it. She screwed herself silently in her mind.

  -We're going to survive it. - He sounded

  -The wedding? - She tried to follow his thoughts.

  He laughed shortly, teasingly.

  -No, we're going to survive one day after another.

  The general use of his thought didn't calm down Julia. It sounded more sarcastic than serious, maybe due to a smile on Marcus Lucius's face. He noticed that she wasn't happy about his answer, so he added:

  -We'll try to solve the riddle. We'll try not to kill anyone. We'll try to step up beyond our limits and not to lose our goodness and honour. - His voice sounded serious and sad. It indicated his internal struggle. It definitely wouldn't be easy to stay calm when the secrets would become public. He was afraid that he won't be able to keep the distance as he did it during the long, exhausting day he just left behind.

  -You're trying to be the best here. - She said with a kind of admiration that was needed for him to hear.

  She wanted to support him, but she wasn't sure how to do it. Her mind didn't like to collaborate and suggest any reasonable thoughts. She knew that she was sick and that her words came out as a consequence of verbal diarrhoea. As she observed him in the last hours, her respect for him grew even stronger. She noticed that he succeed in the attempt to hold his nerve. He struggled with his impulses, but he didn't show to nobody how much did it cost him. He was straight and determined. He was calm and cold blooded. He was acting with purpose and the only goal was to find a safe place for her. She was impressed, even if she didn't like his plan to send her away and to let himself kill by others. Even one man couldn't win any fight against the entire empire. Julia was sorrowed that Hadrian would understand Marcus Lucius's actions as throwing down a gauntlet. It would be stupid to challenge the emperor. Knowing Hadrian from the days in the past, Julia presumed and felt internally that it was the same soul in a grown-up body. Hadrian wanted Marcus Lucius to trust him. It wasn't easy to achieve. Losing trust or tolerating someone could be achieved with minimal means. Winning even a shadow of somebody's confidence was hard.

  -It's not about being the best. It's about being better with every day.

  -It's not easy. - She mumbled.

  -I'm not saying it's going to be easy, I'm saying it's going to be worth it. - He added with a lovely smile. Everything was worth to protect her, to be able to have her in his arms.

  She smiled back and told him the story how she met Hadrian for the very first time. Marcus Lucius listened concentrated, but with closed eyes. She yawn every now and then, but she tried not to lose her focus. He smiled beamy due to comparing Appius's behaviour to an African snake. A gentle smile appeared on his face as he listened what little Julia was talking about with Hadrian.

  -Do you trust him? - Marcus Lucius asked quietly after she finished her story.

  She didn't answer. She felt asleep. In the cosy, warm room with blanket around her chilled to the bone body and in the arms of the man, who was a promise of a safe time. Marcus Lucius stroked her hair and yawned. The amount of pressure and stress of the last hours were a heavy ballast on his shoulders. However, having Julia next to him was a moment of peace. Nothing else mattered. He felt asleep as well. Tomorrow had to come soon, but as long as it was the time before the next day began, Marcus Lucius used it for getting some rest.