Boone narrowed his eyes and looked at her. “No emotions, huh? I would think that has a lot to do with the dampers your suit has been pumping into you.”
K’s mouth was tight. “For the last time, my suit has nothing to do with my lack of emotion. It is my devotion to Purity that helps me purge unwanted feelings, nothing more.”
“Uh-huh.” He took another sip of hot chocolate. “We’ll let you go a week or two without the suit and then see if you’re still feeling so frosty, darlin’.”
“A week?” Though it was clear she was struggling to keep her expression calm, her voice rose uncertainly. “I thought you said you would give me back my suit if I agreed to cooperate.”
“Oh, so you’re feeling cooperative now?” Boone eyed her. “Well, it doesn’t matter if you are or not. The damn thing is too damaged to do you any good right now. It’ll be weeks before it’s regenerated enough to wear again. Maybe months.”
“Months?” This time he could hear the panic from her voice. “But I need it. It shields me—protects me.”
“It drugs you,” Boone said firmly. “And considering all the shit it’s been pumping into you, I’d sign you into rehab for a whole damn year if you were one of my regular patients.”
Her eyes narrowed. “I am not your patient.”
“No, you’re my prisoner.” Boone leaned closer to her and she inched back, just a little. The reaction made him even angrier somehow. He didn’t bite, Goddamnit, even if she did deserve it. “I’m pretty damn sure we’re treating you a hell of a lot better than you would treat us if the situation was reversed.” He growled. “The Purists don’t usually give their captives hot chocolate before purging them, do they?”
“I don’t want your filthy Impure drink.” Her voice had gone back to a monotone and she stared straight ahead. “I only want my suit. If you will not give it to me, I might as well purge myself. It is my duty to die now that I have become contaminated anyway.”
Boone could scarcely believe what he was hearing. “You’re serious? You really want to die just because I touched you?”
“Isn’t that the effect you usually have on women?” Loki’s sarcastic tenor broke Boone’s concentration on the girl. He looked up in irritation to see the effete Erian leaning against one of the mess hall counters, wearing a self satisfied smirk.
“I swear, Loki, if you weren’t such a talented pilot I’d kick your ass three ways to Sunday.”
“I love you too, Boone.” Loki blew him a kiss. “Now kids, if you’re about done playing footsie under the table we need to talk about our course.”
Boone frowned. “What’s there to talk about? Engage the hyperdrive and we’ll go straight to Midas.”
“Impossible.” Loki shook his head. “Sorry Boone but that last blast to get us away from the Purist vessel and into deep orbit fried the transconducer so the hyperdrive is barely limping along at half power. And since Princess Purist and her band of merry Paladins shot Krill, we have no engineer to fix it.” He gave K an unfriendly look which she returned with a blank stare.
“What?” Boone ran a hand through his hair in agitation. “But I thought—”
“I told you this thing was a pile of junk when you bought it.” Loki thumped the curving wall behind him, making a hollow boom. “Now if we were aboard the Dream Spinner right now we’d already be halfway to Midas. Not that it would do you any good.”
“What are you talking about?” Boone growled. “Of course it would.”
“Not if you’re depending on her to help.” Loki nodded at K. “Go on, sweetheart, tell Boone here what you’ll do the minute we get to the mines,” he urged.
K sat up straighter, her chin lifted proudly. “If you take me to the pshalite mines I’ll announce that I have been contaminated and that I must be purged at once.”
“See?” Loki said. “She’s still in full Paladin mode. You touched her and she’s contaminated—therefore she wants to die. She’s no help to you like she is now, Boone.”
“She’ll be plenty of help if she wants to get her suit back.” Boone clenched his jaw in frustration. “We’ve already waited so long—”
“And we’ll have to wait a little longer. Look, Boone…” Loki put an empty mug in the food simulator and pushed a few buttons. “At least you know the Purists don’t do rape. So other than a little hard labor, she should be fine.”
“Easy for you to say.” Boone got up and started pacing. “It’s been almost six solar months already. Who knows what goes on in those mines?”
“She probably does.” Loki nodded at K again. “Tell him what happens to prisoners in the pshalite mines, Paladin. What’s the life expectancy?”
K frowned. “I don’t have exact statistics but I believe barring accidents and injuries—”
“See? Accidents and injuries. It’s a fucking mine, Loki. Dark, dirty, underground. There are probably cave-ins and gas explosions and—”
“Boone, honey, please…” Mom was suddenly beside him, taking his arm. Their height different was such that the top of her head barely reached his elbow but it didn’t matter. He felt a current of calm flowing between them at her touch. “Relax,” she murmured. “Getting upset won’t help. Release your fears to the Goddess.”
“I’m sorry.” He sank down beside K again who was looking at him as though he was an escaped lunatic. I probably just displayed more emotion in the last five seconds than she’s felt in the last five years, Boone thought sourly.
“It’s okay, honey. We know why you’re upset,” Mom said soothingly.
“I just get so crazy when I think of it,” Boone muttered. “She’s my little sister and she’s out there alone, unprotected…”
“Shayla can take care of herself better than you think.” Loki took the now full mug out of the simulator and sipped something that smelled like a cross between beer and chicken soup. “She’s a tough girl. She’ll make it a little while longer.”
“How much longer?” Boone demanded.
“It’s going to take us at least two solar weeks to get back to Minotaur and then we have to pray they have the part we need.” Loki blew on his beer soup and took another sip.
Boone looked up wearily. “And if they don’t?”
Loki shrugged. “Then I hope you like saurian meat. The outpost on Minny isn’t very big and from what I hear that’s mostly what’s on the menu. We could be eating it for quite some time if we have to wait for a part from Eros or Colossus.”
“Let’s cut the worst case scenario shit and say they have the part on hand,” Boone said evenly. “Then can we fly directly to Midas?”
Loki frowned. “I’d like to tell you absolutely yes, Boone, but I just don’t think it’s wise. We need to go to Eros first, ditch this piece of junk and get the Dream Spinner out of drydock.”
Boone sighed. “Look, Loki, I know you don’t like this ship but—”
“It’s not a matter of me liking it or not. It’s too obviously Erian. You saw how her crew reacted to it.” He nodded at K. “Do you really want to take it into Purist air space? I think that’s a bad idea unless you want to be helping dear little sis dig big nasty chunks of pshalite out of the ground instead of rescuing her.”
“You know I don’t.”
“I didn’t think so. Good, so we agree that a short layover at Eros is necessary. And not just to change ships.”
“What?” Boone frowned. “What else do we need to do? Take on supplies? That shouldn’t take too long.”
“No, it shouldn’t but we need more than supplies or at least I do. I have to find a new touch-partner. Or have you forgotten that one of little Miss Purity’s crew killed Chall?” There was genuine pain in his voice—and real hatred in his eyes when he looked at K.
Boone ran both hands through his hair. Great, this just gets better and better! “Christ, Loki,” he said, trying to choose his words carefully. “I know I got you into this mess in the first place and I’m sorry Chall is gone. But we don’t have three or four solar months fo
r you to play the matchmaking game and find a new boyfriend.”
Loki’s gold ringed eyes flashed. “It’s not like I’m looking for a life-bond here, Boone. It’s my Goddess-damned sex cycle. If I hit my peak while we’re out in space somewhere without a touch-partner I probably won’t survive. I love your sister—you know I do—but I’m not willing to die for her.”
“All right. All right.” Boone scrubbed a hand over his face and noticed absently that he needed a shave. “Fine, I get it, you need a new touch-partner.”
“Unless you want to fuck me, big boy.” Loki batted his long eyelashes at Boone but the look in his eyes was still angry.
“You know, I think I’m going to take a pass on that.” Boone took another sip of his now cold hot chocolate. “So how long—”
“Watch out, she’s falling!” Mom’s startled shout made him jump and he turned, half expecting to see that their Paladin prisoner had found another weapon and was trying to kill herself again. That wasn’t the case, however, although K did appear to be doing a good job of dying without any help at all. Her strange black-on-black eyes had rolled up in her head and she was twitching like a broken doll as she fell backwards off the bench.
Boone caught her just before she could hit the floor—he was big but he was fast—and cradled her, still wrapped in the white thermal blanket. Quickly he put a hand to her cheek and noticed with alarm how cold it was. But though his touch had helped her before, K continued to writhe and seize uncontrollably. He looked up at Loki helplessly. “You’re the expert on this touch deprivation shit—now what?”
Loki arched an eyebrow and took another sip from his mug, apparently completely unperturbed. “Now the fun begins.”
Chapter Four
“I have to what?”
“You heard me, undress. The more skin-to-skin contact the better.”
“But—”
“Look, Boone, petting her cheek like she’s a sick puppy isn’t helping. She needs more from you. Unless you want her to die, that is.”
“Of course I don’t want her to die. I just don’t understand…”
The voices above her roared in and out like waves on a beach. Not that K had ever been to a real beach—all of Athena was industrialized and had been for years. But she had seen a vid of one once and the image had never left her—the gray-green waters breaking across the sandy shore, advancing and retreating over and over and over again. She felt like that now, felt like her body was adrift and floating somehow, her consciousness being dragged back and forth as the voices above her head argued about her fate.
“I don’t like this, Loki. You’re sure it’s really necessary?” Boone’s deep voice was grumbling as K felt herself being picked up and held again.
“No, I’m not,” came the waspish reply. “I’m not sure about anything. After all, she’s a Purist not an Erian although she doesn’t look much like the other Purists I saw back during the Pan wars. All I know is the way she’s acting is classic touch deprivation.”
“The way she’s acting could be any number of things. Chemical withdrawal from losing her suit or—”
“It’s not just the way she looks, Boone—it’s the way she feels. Much as I hate to admit it, every sense I have screams ‘home’ when I look at her. Her height, the shape of her features, the way she smells—”
“You can tell by her scent? But you haven’t been close enough to touch her—you left that honor to me,” Boone protested.
“Because she imprinted on you. Besides, if I touched her right now it would be to choke the life out of her,” Loki snapped. “Inhabitants of Eros have a very specialized sense of smell that allows us to find anyone else with even a drop of Erian blood in their veins.”
“Why would…oh, so you can find potential touch-partners in a pinch. I get it.”
“Exactly. We don’t have to have another Erian as a partner but it’s better physiologically if we do. So I could be wrong about this but I don’t think so. And while I don’t give a good Goddessdamn whether she lives or not, I know you think she’s the best chance you have of getting Shayla out of those mines alive. So you’d better trust my instincts.”
“But how could a Purist born and bred on Athena have a disease that’s exclusive to the inhabitants of Eros?”
“Like I said, I don’t know. It’s possible she’s got some Erian DNA. The Purists spent hundreds of cycles stamping out sexual desire and normal procreation among their people so they had to get new recruits somewhere. That’s why they started cloning.”
“But you can only get twenty or thirty viable clones out of one DNA sample,” Boone protested.
“Exactly. So they had to branch out. You think the Pan Wars were just about Athena taking over a farm planet because they’d ruined their own world with over-industrialization? Think again, they needed fresh blood, literally.”
“But they hate Erians. Why would they use their DNA?”
“Damned if I know but I do know they didn’t invite yours truly down to their genetics lab just for a spot of tea. They took samples regularly. All kinds of samples.” Loki sounded like he might be shivering. K wanted to open her eyes and see but then she washed out with the tide again and everything went black.
When she opened her eyes again it was dark and she was being held against something firm and warm. There was a scent she halfway recognized, something dark and spicy and somehow male but she couldn’t quite place it. She wasn’t sick and shaky anymore as she remembered being while sitting at the table listening to Boone and Loki argue, but the feeling of being in the ocean was still there.
The rhythmic sensation of advancing and retreating was somehow soothing and K thought she could almost hear the quiet rush of the water as it pushed itself up to the shore and pulled back again. Almost without realizing she was doing it, she matched her breathing to the soft rhythm and felt somehow entirely at peace.
Then something stirred behind her. No, not something…someone.
K sat bolt upright in the darkness, her mind screaming, contaminated. She tried to get away but strong hands reached for her and dragged her back down.
“Settle down.” Boone sounded irritated and sleepy. “It’s the middle of the night, go back to sleep.”
“I can’t sleep like this,” she protested. “You’re touching me!”
“Yeah, well get used to it.”
“No!” Twisting in his arms like a fish she rammed the top of her head upwards, hoping to connect with something sensitive. From Boone’s pained grunt, she succeeded. Thanking Purity that her hands were free, she scrambled away from him in the dark, fingers outstretched, searching for anything she could use as a weapon.
“Lights,” Boone said.
The sudden flash of brilliance stabbed at her eyes and K was momentarily blinded. When she looked up she saw Boone sitting on a raised sleep pallet and holding his bleeding nose. He was so big he looked like a mountain of hard tanned flesh in the middle of the blue thermal blankets. The expression on his face was anything but friendly.
“Stay back.” K realized she was still naked but that hardly mattered. She would always be naked without her suit. I fear nothing, I feel nothing. I fear nothing, I feel nothing. If only it were true. Her heart was racing and her breath came in ragged, panicky gasps. She crouched in a defensive posture, ready to brain him the minute he came for her.
Except he just sat there.
“Do I look like I’m coming after you, darlin’?” His voice was muffled as he pressed a clean white paper cloth to his nose. “I’m staying right here. You might as well relax.”
“I’ll relax when I have my suit back and you’re dead.” K didn’t ease her posture a bit.
“Christ, that hurt. If you’d hit me just a little harder you would have broken it.” Boone sniffed and wiped the last of the blood from his face. “You can forget about your suit for now. There’s not a single weapon in this room and the door is voice-locked to my command only. So maybe you should simmer down because you’re not g
etting out of here anytime soon.”
K was silent, measuring him with her eyes. Though she hated to admit it, he was probably too large to take down in hand to hand combat, at least not when he was on his guard. If only she’d realized what was happening before! If she’d been able to make some kind of a plan instead of just lying there letting him touch her…
Boone sniffed again before balling up the red spotted paper cloth and pitching it into a waste receptacle beside the sleeping pallet. “Are you going to stay there all night? Don’t suppose I can convince you to come back to bed.”
“With you? Not likely.” K glared at him. “Why were you touching me again, anyway?”
“Why do you think? It wasn’t because I wanted to, that’s for damn sure,” he growled. “It’s apparently the only way to keep you healthy.”
“I’ve never touched or been touched by anyone in my life until you contaminated me,” K said evenly. “What makes you think I want or need it now?”
“Only the fact that you go into Goddamn seizures when I leave you alone for too long.”
“I was fine until you took off my suit,” K pointed out.
“Because it was pumping you full of drugs that circumvented your body’s needs,” he countered. “And before you got the suit, the Purists were probably drugging your food. But now the drugs are gone and you’ve got some Erian in your genetic makeup somewhere which means—”
“That’s a lie,” K interrupted him. She vaguely remembered hearing him saying the same thing—or had it been Loki?—earlier when she was fading in and out of consciousness. But to hear the filthy untruth spoken aloud and right to her face was too much. “Erians are disgusting. They’re depraved. They want to touch…” she trailed off, realizing what she was saying.
“Touch each other all the time?” Boone finished for her. “Yeah, they do, darlin’ but it isn’t because Eros is the planetary version of Sodom and Gomorrah like you seem to think. There’s a chemical in the atmosphere that’s leached into their DNA—it makes them touch-sensitive. They need physical contact the same way the rest of us need to eat and drink. And sleep,” he added with a yawn. “So will you please come back to bed?”