mad maddie:
god, and i am definitely ready to NOT.
mad maddie:
seriously, if i could graduate tomorrow, i would. i’d be like, hasta la vista, baby! g-bye, atlanta—hello, santa cruz!
zoegirl:
*if* you get in. which you will. i hate that you want to go so far away, though.
mad maddie:
blame angela. if we hadn’t gone to california with her over the summer …
zoegirl:
too ironic. she escapes california to move back to atlanta, and now all you wanna do is escape atlanta and move to california.
mad maddie:
U.C.S.C., here i come. go, banana slugs!
zoegirl:
is that honestly their mascot?
mad maddie:
it honestly is their mascot. it’s 1 of the many cool things about them—their whole who-gives-a-damn attitude about typical college stuff like rah-rah football teams. that and the fact that they’re 3,000 miles away, heh heh heh.
zoegirl:
oh, wow
zoegirl:
maddie … i just realized something
mad maddie:
what?
zoegirl:
things really are changing, aren’t they? we’re seniors, we’re going to graduate in 3 months, we’re all going to go our separate ways …
mad maddie:
and this comes as a surprise?
zoegirl:
no … i just don’t know if i’m ready
mad maddie:
i sure as hell am
mad maddie:
repeat after me: change is good
zoegirl:
omg—no *way* did you just say that!
zoegirl:
if angela were here, she’d be rolling on the ground.
mad maddie:
pardon me, but all i said was that change is good. why is that funny?
zoegirl:
oh, mads. aren’t you the one who was outraged when they switched brands of soap in the girls’ bathroom?
mad maddie:
the old kind was better! it smelled like lavender!
zoegirl:
and you have a fit if you can’t start the day with your pop-tart and dr pepper. i thought you were going to stage a riot that day the drink machine was out!
mad maddie:
i’m a growing girl. i need my caffeine.
zoegirl:
and every time facebook changes its layout, you swear you’re going to shut down yr fb page forever
mad maddie:
your point?
zoegirl:
my point is that you *hate* change
mad maddie:
no i don’t
zoegirl:
yeah, you do
zoegirl:
it’s cute
mad maddie:
i thought we were talking about marching off into the big bad world, not what kind of soap comes out when you squirt the thingie in the bathroom. and all i was saying is that we can’t stay in high school forever, even if we wanted to.
zoegirl:
i know that. but it still feels huge.
mad maddie:
anywayz, no reason to get worked up about it now. there’ll be plenty of time for weeping and gnashing of the teeth before it’s over.
zoegirl:
i already gnash my teeth—that’s why i wear a mouth guard at night. my dentist says it’s the curse of being an overachiever.
mad maddie:
an overachiever? YOU?
zoegirl:
haha
zoegirl:
hey, can i tell you something stupid that’s totally not worth dealing with, but at the same time i’m kind of disturbed by?
mad maddie:
shoot
zoegirl:
it has to do with jana. still wanna hear?
mad maddie:
oh god. not THE J-WORD.
zoegirl:
you and jana have a past. i’m just trying to be sensitive.
mad maddie:
you might have to excuse me while i retch, but other than that, go ahead.
zoegirl:
well, right before i left school today, i ran into terri. now, normally we wouldn’t have even exchanged hellos, because of the fact she’s jana’s best friend. but terri had been crying—her eyes were red and her face was all puffy—and i would have been a complete jerk to not say anything.
mad maddie:
if i’d seen terri and she’d been crying, i wouldn’t have said anything.
zoegirl:
yes you would’ve
mad maddie:
and if the situation were reversed, i wouldn’t want HER to say anything, either.
zoegirl:
well, i am a good human, so i said, “um … terri? you ok?” which made her burst into tears all over again.
mad maddie:
c? that is why you should leave crying ppl alone.
zoegirl:
she was *horrified* to be falling apart like that in front of me, i could tell. she kept saying, “i’m fine, i’m fine,” but she obviously wasn’t. so i took her to the girls’ room and gave her a wet paper towel to press against her eyes, and we ended up sitting down below the sinks and talking.
mad maddie:
so what was wrong? or rather, what terrible and awful thing had jana done to her?
zoegirl:
they’d gotten into a yelling match over terri’s hair, if you can believe it. you know how it’s now the same shade as jana’s? jana had cussed terri out for being a clone, and i guess she took it too far and said some really nasty things.
mad maddie:
jana takes everything too far. she always has, but this year even more so.
mad maddie:
she should go thru life armed with an apology and a complimentary bag of peanuts.
zoegirl:
well, i felt bad for terri, even tho she’s not my favorite person. i hate it when i fight with you or angela.
mad maddie:
what r u talking about? we don’t fight.
zoegirl:
so i said something like, “she shouldn’t treat you that way,” and terri said, “she treats *everybody* that way.” i said she better stop or she won’t have any friends left, and terri snorted. she was like, “poor little jana, alone in a corner. just her and her teddy bear.”
mad maddie:
HA
zoegirl:
that’s what *i* said. because it’s such an oxymoron, the image of jana—mistress of death and destruction—clutching a teddy bear.
mad maddie:
ooo, nice use of the word “oxymoron.” i KNEW i should have taken that SAT prep course.
zoegirl:
but terri goes, “for real, jana has this mangy old teddy bear that smells like spit. she takes it with her everywhere.”
mad maddie:
???
mad maddie:
i’ve never seen jana with a teddy bear
zoegirl:
she leaves it in her car. that’s what terri says. which is entirely possible. have you seen all the crap in the back of jana’s station wagon?
mad maddie:
it’s a mobile junk heap. it’s disgusting.
zoegirl:
according to terri, jana’s dad gave her the teddy bear when she was little, and she’s unhealthily attached to it.
zoegirl:
its name is Boo Boo Bear.
mad maddie:
Boo Boo Bear???
mad maddie:
omfg, i am loving this so much. Boo Boo Bear!
zoegirl:
terri was like, “i can’t believe i’m telling you—jana would *die*.”
mad maddie:
heh heh heh, jana whitaker is unhealthily attached to Boo Boo Bear. suddenly the world is a MUCH brighter place!!!
zoegirl:
er … not necessarily. because 2 seconds later, jana her
self stormed into the bathroom. “*there* you are,” she says to terri, all fuming. “you’re not even going to let me apologize?”
zoegirl:
then she noticed me, and her jaw dropped. she was like, “what are YOU doing here?”
mad maddie:
plz, it’s a public bathroom. does she think it’s her private office?
zoegirl:
my heart got all poundy, because—as you know—i’m a wimp, although jana had already switched to ignoring me. she said to terri, “get up, we’re leaving.”
mad maddie:
ok, that is the perfect example of the evilness of jana. she’s bossy and she’s mean.
zoegirl:
but amazingly, terri didn’t obey. she said, “you can’t treat me like dirt and then expect me to be your slave.”
zoegirl:
“terri, get up,” jana said, still very pointedly not looking at me. “we can talk about your ‘issues’ later.”
mad maddie:
oh god
zoegirl:
so terri goes, “*my* issues? you’re the one with issues! keep acting the way you’re acting, and you won’t have any friends left!”
mad maddie:
which is exactly what YOU said!
zoegirl:
i know! and for some reason that made me get all stupidly brave, and under my breath i said, “no one but Boo Boo Bear.”
mad maddie:
holy shit! u da BOMB!
zoegirl:
i shouldn’t have, though! it was totally unlike me!
mad maddie:
that’s what’s so great!
mad maddie:
did jana hear?
zoegirl:
she whipped her head toward me and was like, “WHAT did you say?” and terri goes, “she SAID, no one but Boo Boo Bear.”
mad maddie:
gee, thx, terri
zoegirl:
jana was speechless. i’ve never in my life seen her speechless, but for that single moment she was. big splotches of color bloomed on her cheeks. it was freaky.
mad maddie:
cuz she IS a freak
zoegirl:
then she pulled herself together and said to me, “you’ve got nerve, sticking your nose up. not all of us live in a perfect plastic bubble, you know.”
mad maddie:
exsqueeze me? what is that supposed to mean?!
zoegirl:
she was trying to make me feel like a spoiled little baby, in comparison to her, the jaded and worldly jana.
mad maddie:
who has a teddy bear.
zoegirl:
her tone said 1 thing—see how cool and detached i am? i couldn’t care less that you know about my stupid bear—but her eyes said something else entirely. she looked like she wanted to kill me. i’m not kidding.
mad maddie:
well, duh. if anyone had to be there for that lovely moment, i’m sure you were the last person she’d pick. you or me or angela, that is.
zoegirl:
that thought crossed my mind, but i tried to tell myself, “no, you’re being silly.”
mad maddie:
except yr not. we have what jana doesn’t have—actual true friends who lift each other up instead of tear each other down—and it’s like a knife inside her heart.
mad maddie:
think of it like this: jana’s a dragon (SO not a stretch) and terri exposed her secret piece of weakness. so now jana’s screwed twice: 1st cuz u know about Boo Boo Bear, and 2nd cuz u know how easily terri would betray her.
zoegirl:
jana the dragon. i just hope she doesn’t flame me.
mad maddie:
if she does, she’ll have ME to deal with.
mad maddie:
now isn’t it time to pick up your long-lost boyfriend? it’s 5:15.
zoegirl:
it is? EEEEEK! IT IS!!!!!
zoegirl:
go pick up angela from her aunt’s house and then swing by here. i’ll be the 1 gnawing my fingernails to the quick!
mad maddie:
i’m heading out the door. l8r, g8r!
A CONVERSATION WITH
LAUREN MYRACLE
Why were your books banned and do you personally believe that they should have been?
Lots of my books have teen girls in them. Teen girls sometimes talk about sex. Teen girls sometimes have sex. Lots of grownups would like to believe that this is not true. i am not one of those grown-ups, and i think it’s important and meaningful to give readers stories that reflect reality—in a respectful way. Like, not salaciously, but with the intent of saying, “Let’s look at how this story played out. How’d it seem to work out for so-and-so?” And then the readers—who are SMART, damn it—can grapple with those issues themselves. And no, i do not believe my books should have been banned. i do not believe that any author should be banned, ever. Freedom of speech, dude. :)
What’s your response when you are censored? Are you ever frustrated, or do you take pride in it?
At first i cried. And called my editor and apologized, because i felt so terrible about it. Now i take pride … but it requires a bit of emotional effort, because it still hurts to have people say, out loud and with venom, “Your books suck. You suck.”
What was your favorite part of writing the Internet Girls series?
My fave part of writing this series was NOT HAVING TO WRITE SETTING. i hate setting. in other books that aren’t purely written in text/IMs, my annoying (awesome) editor makes me include setting, and it is hard.
Which of your characters is most like you, and which character do you wish you were more like?
I’m most like Winnie from the Winnie Years series. She’s a good girl, funny, tries to do the right thing. Often gets into embarrassing situations. i once ran over a squirrel on my bike.
Whom do i wish i were more like? i’m going to go with cat from Shine, because she has courage in spades. she doesn’t let the haters get to her. sometimes i do.
How do you come up with your characters?
I follow my children around as they go through their lives and i spy on them. i wear a trench coat and carry a notepad. i am vair vair subtle.
Except, really, i do.
As an author, what’s your average day like?
Oh, an average day of writing means MAKING MYSELF WRITE. And then thinking, “Oh, this is fun.” And then writing some more.
What do you think books offer that other forms of entertainment don’t?
Books engage readers in a more intimate way than other forms of entertainment/media, i think. They encourage critical thinking.
What is your very best life advice?
Best advice? Sheesh. Imagine life is like this: You’re waiting at a red light. You’re stuck there. You didn’t choose to be, but there you are. How are you going to spend your time? Bitching and moaning and looking at your watch, or thinking INTERESTING thoughts? Looking at the beautiful sky? Laughing at a joke? So, use this life WISELY—we’re dead a lot longer than we’re alive—and leave the universe a better place than when you got here.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
Oh, li’l dudes, i thank you:
Liz Baltich, Kelly Dean, Todd Mitchell, Laura Pritchett, and Jack Martin, for being the best readers a girl could ask for; Derek Decoux, poet extraordinaire and all-around cool guy; my agent, Barry Goldblatt, for assuring me that i don’t suck whenever i convince myself i do; the groovy folks at Abrams, for giving me such a wonderful book-y home; erica Finkel, goddess of cool and slave driver of scary fierceness; and the inestimable susan van Metre, for making me write the damn novel again and again and AGAIN. *flings self on dagger and perishes*
Thanks to Al, who wanted Maddie to say “blah, blah, blah.” (And Jamie and Mirabelle, thank you, too, just for being so cute.)
And finally, huge hugs and thanks to Maria Middleton for giving this baby its sparkly new updated look!
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
&nb
sp; LAUREN MYRACLE is the author of many books for teens and young people, including the New York Times bestselling internet Girls series, Shine, Rhymes with Witches, Bliss, The Infinite Moment of Us, and the Flower Power series. She lives with her family in Fort Collins, Colorado. Visit her online at laurenmyracle.com.
Want to check out what Angela is listening to? Go to http://www.laurenmyracle.com/site/ttfn.html for an exclusive Internet Girls playlist, curated by Lauren Myracle!
Lauren Myracle, Ttfn
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