The next day was my day off and I was so relaxed from the day of fresh air and sunshine that I actually slept in. It was something that I hadn’t done in years and it felt wonderful. I woke up about half past nine and panicked a little at first, thinking of all the things I had to do. It was something I had done every morning since I was about thirteen. I’d open my eyes and think of all that I needed to do and then I’d obsess over getting them done. It was part of trying to make the things I could control in my life outweigh the things that I couldn’t.
Then I changed tracks mentally and thought about Aiden and that made me feel all warm and comfortable inside. I let myself linger in bed a little longer and then I dawdled over my coffee and then instead of my usual quickie shower, I let myself take a long, luxurious bath. It all felt wonderful and although it was almost noon before I was ready to do anything, I was more content than I had been in a very long time.
At last I got together my laundry things and began to head over to my mother’s house. Once a week I did her laundry for fear that if I didn’t, she would wear clothes stained with vomit from some of her long, hard nights. On my way out the door I nearly ran into Aiden’s driver head first.
“I’m sorry, Miss,” he told me. “I was about to knock on your door.” He held an envelope in his hands and I had the silliest little moment of panic that it was a letter from Aiden telling me he wanted to call the whole thing off because he’d decided that I wasn’t good enough after all to be the mother of his child. I really needed to work on that confidence, or lack thereof.
“That’s okay, I didn’t see you there.”
“That’s because you have your arms awfully full. Mr. Scott asked me to deliver this envelope to you. Can I help you with those bags?” I had two large bags of dirty clothes and laundry supplies in my hands.
Sitting them down near the door I said, “Oh no, thank you. I’m headed to do laundry. I’m used to it.” He handed me the envelope, and then offered to drop me wherever I needed to go. When I politely declined, because there was no way I was letting Aiden find out about my mother, he left. As soon as he was gone I lugged my bags back inside and opened the envelope. There was a one page letter and I carried it through the house and outside. I was craving the fresh air. I opened up the letter.