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“Yeah, well, you don’t have that right. Only someone who loves me has the right to kill for me. ”
“I have every right when it comes to you,” he scraped out, closing the distance between them. He speared his fingers into her hair, holding her head in his rough hands, and put his face right over hers. “You’re mine. Every beautiful, stubborn, mouthwatering inch of you. You may not believe me, but you mean something to me, Lily. A hell of a lot more than any other woman ever has. ” His voice dropped, and he pressed his forehead to hers. “It’s scaring the shit out of me, baby. We’re talking pure fucking terror. ”
“Her perfume,” she muttered, turning her head to the side, afraid to let his words into the tenderness of her heart. They could do so much damage in there. “You still smell like her. ”
“I can fix that. ” He took his gun from the back of his jeans, set it on the bedside table, then picked her up and carried her into the bathroom. Seconds later they were both naked and she was against the shower’s tiled wall, the water misting against her face as Ryder lowered his head and took her tight nipple into the scorching heat of his mouth. With her heartbeat roaring in her ears, she watched the erotic play of his mouth as it skimmed over her flesh. Watched the glistening drops of water cling to his thick lashes, the lush detail the perfect complement to his rugged, outrageous beauty. He was mesmerizing her, steam collecting around their bodies like a primordial mist as his lips found hers, the drugging, head-spinning kisses clouding her mind.
But the feel of his hands suddenly gripping her ass, lifting her off her feet, his hips pushing between her thighs, demanding she make room for him, jerked her back to the moment. His cock was heavy and urgently hard against her cleft, and she knew from the coiling in his muscles that he was only seconds away from burying himself deep.
“Don’t come in me,” she gasped, watching him from beneath her lashes. “Not tonight. ”
His sensual mouth flattened into a hard line. “Why?”
“Because that’s something that only lovers should do. Not two people who are just fucking each other. ”
Pushing her wet hair back from her face with his hand, he said, “I’ve fucked a lot of women, Lily. More than I care to admit. I’ve fucked them without even knowing a damn thing about them. Without caring, except for what I could get out of them. So don’t, for one goddamn second, look at me and tell me that when I’m buried inside you it’s nothing more than fucking. You might not know the difference but I do. ”
The next thing she knew he was carrying her out of the shower, back into the bedroom, and tossing her into the middle of the mattress. Then he stared down at her from the side of the bed, dripping with water, his lean muscles coiled with power beneath the tight stretch of his skin. “Open your legs for me. ”
“No. I need to—”
“Open your fucking legs, Lily. ” His deep voice resonated with a sharp bite of command that only made her wetter. “Do it now or I’m spanking your ass. ”
“Like hell you are,” she snapped, rolling over. She tried to crawl away, thinking she could scramble off the other side, but he was too fast. He came down over her hard, flattening her against the damp sheets.
“I know I should let you go, but I can’t,” he groaned, before doing his best to blow her freaking mind. His mouth was on her everywhere, pressing kisses down her spine, before he turned her over and licked his way from her navel up to her chest. He made thick, sexy sounds under his breath as he moved from one breast to the other, leaving both nipples shiny and throbbing, before moving higher, covering her with his strength and his heat. His hips settled against hers, his heavy shaft rubbing through the drenched folds of her sex. Then he reached down between them, fitting the broad crown against her opening, and started that slow, thick push inside. His hands found her wrists, holding them against the bed, his weight braced on his elbows . . . and his face close to hers. “You feel so fucking good, Lil. I can’t get enough of you. Of touching you. Of feeling you trapped beneath me. ”
She arched, shivering as he started to ride her with grinding, devastating thrusts, unable to believe how quickly he could melt her down. Make her ache. Her pulse raced, body clenching, her head thrashing as a lush, shattering burst of pleasure slammed into her so hard she screamed like someone in pain, sobbing and crying. When she’d finally quieted, she realized he’d been waiting for her to calm before letting himself experience his own release. Looking savagely gorgeous, he gritted his teeth and shoved himself deep, holding there as he came, and Lily knew this was why he’d waited. He’d wanted her to feel every exquisite throb and pulse of his magnificent cock as he blasted inside her, filling her up. When he finally drew back, pulling his shaft from her greedy clasp, he braced himself on a straight arm at her side, his other hand pressed against her inner thigh, and stared between her legs.
“What are you doing?” she whispered.
“Watching my cum drip out of you. ” He ran his fingertips over her drenched vulva and lower, where she could feel his semen sliding down, then looked up at her from under his lashes. “I could never get tired of seeing that. It’s so fucking beautiful. ” He took a deep breath, and his voice got even huskier. “I want all of you, Lily. ”
“I’ve given you everything,” she breathed.
“Almost. ” His teeth nipped her earlobe as he came down on top of her, one hand braced by her head while the other curved around her hip to grab her ass. With his fingertips slipping into the crease, rubbing against the sensitive flesh there, he said, “I want it all. Every part of you. ”
Although it wasn’t something that she had ever thought she would experience, Lily surrendered completely, trusting him to take care of her and bring her pleasure in an act that was far more erotic than anything she’d ever imagined she would engage in. He used her baby oil to lube his cock, then positioned her on her hands and knees as he knelt behind her. She gripped the slats in the headboard with white knuckles, not really knowing what to expect. She’d enjoyed his thumb touching her there—but his erection penetrating the tight hole might be another matter entirely. She braced herself, but he wasn’t in any rush, soothing her with his touch and his seductive words as he told her how much he wanted her, needed her, owned her. He said she was his again and again, his voice turning guttural as he finally started to work that massive, vein-ridged shaft inside her. She panted, gasping, eyes squeezed shut against the muted glow of light spilling in from the bathroom. She hadn’t expected the pleasure to be quite so strong, and she trembled, shaking, sounds crawling up from her throat that spurred him on, letting him know without words that she was enjoying herself.
“You are so fucking incredible, Lil. ” He pulled her up so that his mouth was at her ear, and filled one hand with her breast, pinching her nipple, while the other burrowed between her legs, stroking her clit. He was all the way in now, and he held her against him like that as he started to move, pumping into her with slow, thick lunges that made her desperate for more. He moved the fingers on her clit to her vulva, pushing them inside her with a greedy, sharp-edged hunger, as if he wanted to be everywhere at once.
“Give me your mouth,” he growled, and she turned her head, crying out as his tongue thrust past her lips. He was filling every part of her, and it was too much, pushing her over the edge. She came hard and wet and long, sobbing into his mouth. He kissed her more aggressively than he ever had before, then started fucking her harder as he curved her forward, back down to the bed, and followed her over. With a harsh shout, he buried his face in the curve of her throat and rammed himself deep, pulsing inside her in a long, shuddering climax that left them both wrecked. When he finally stirred and carefully pulled out, he lifted her into his arms and carried her back into the shower, soothing her sore body with the hot water and steam, carefully washing and caring for her. As his rough fingers gently touched the puckered entrance where he’d been buried, he softly growled, “No one but me,” in her ear, then moved h
is fingers to her swollen vulva, touching her there as well. “I mean that, Lily. Only me. You’re mine. ”
She nodded weakly, too limp to even be embarrassed by anything that they’d done. It had felt right. And the raw, aggressive way that he’d staked his claim on her had felt right, too.
“I can handle you, Scott. I will be whatever you need. You just have to be honest with me. ”
“All I need is you,” he told her, and it was true. With Lily, the games he played for control didn’t matter. There were no rules with her. No boundaries. He just wanted to consume her in every possible way and make himself a permanent part of her life. Make a new life with her. One that didn’t have any ties to the past. One that looked, for once, to the future. He just didn’t know how to make that happen. How to fix what was wrong with him, so that he could be what she needed.
They finally dragged themselves from the shower, and he dried her with a towel, before carrying her back into the bedroom. He stripped off the damp sheets, tossed some dry blankets over the mattress, and then they got into bed. She cuddled against him in the darkness, with her back to his chest, his arms wrapped tight around her. Though her breathing was slow and even, he knew she hadn’t yet fallen asleep. He hadn’t planned on making the confession, but he suddenly heard himself saying, “My mom was a junkie. ” He had to swallow against the knot in his throat, but forced himself to keep going. “Not party drugs. The hard stuff. The kind that left you drooling on the kitchen floor, while your kid tried his best to drag you to bed. On the nights you actually made it home. ”
“That couldn’t have been easy,” she said quietly, lifting his hand to her lips and softly kissing his battered knuckles.
“It sucked. I never knew when I was going to find her passed out in her vomit or screwing some dealer on the kitchen table or no longer breathing. She finally OD’d when I was sixteen, and I . . . I decided from that point on that I never wanted anyone to mean anything to me. That I didn’t want to feel responsible for keeping someone I cared about alive. ”
When he fell silent, she didn’t push him for anything more. She simply rolled over in his arms, cupped his face in her hands, and tenderly kissed his mouth. Something hot and vibrant and tender rushed through him, his hands pressing against her back, locking her against him as he deepened the kiss, slipping his tongue between her lips, her sweet taste somehow washing away the bitterness of his past and replacing it with something that felt strangely like . . . hope.
They kissed for what felt like hours, neither pushing the intimacy to the next level, as if they just wanted to stay lost in the moment, until exhaustion finally claimed them. They slept in a tangled knot, his palm resting against the center of her chest, as if he could hold the rhythm of her heart in his hand. He slipped his other hand under her hair and curled it around her nape, as if he could hold her forever.
But their time was already running out.
TEN
RYDER WASN’T SURE WHAT IT WAS THAT HAD WOKEN HIM. He’d heard something, but it hadn’t been loud. Maybe a creak in the hallway or the rasp of a door being opened. But it’d been enough to catch his attention.
He woke Lily up as he pulled out of her arms, throwing his legs over the side of the bed, careful not to make a sound.
“Scott?” she whispered groggily, lifting up on her elbow.
“Shh. ”
“What’s going on?”
Though he didn’t have any proof, he listened to what his gut was telling him. If he was wrong, then he’d let her and Mike have a good laugh at his expense about it later. But he wasn’t going to second-guess his instincts. Not when Lily’s life was on the line. “It’s Rado,” he told her. “He’s here. ”
He heard her stifled gasp, but she was too smart to cry out. They both got to their feet and silently dressed. He pulled his cell phone from his back pocket, only to find that the battery had died on him. Shit. And there wasn’t a landline in the room. Grabbing his gun from the bedside table, he checked the clip, then curled the fingers of his free hand around Lily’s wrist and motioned for her to stay behind him as he made his way over to the door. There was a soft scrape of sound as he started to pull the door open, his hand now gripping her arm as he positioned her against the wall. If someone was in the hallway, he didn’t want them getting a clear shot at Lily when he opened the door.
Forcing himself to stay loose and calm, Ryder took a quick look around the edge of the doorway. The hallway was clear in both directions, the low glow of a light in the living room relieving the shadows. He listened for any sounds, but the house was silent, and he wondered where Mike was. If Rado and his men had found the safe house, the odds were high that they’d followed them from the club, which meant they already knew about Mike. It also meant they’d probably been watching him and Lily in the parking lot, and his gut cramped, his lips pulling back from his teeth as he choked back a snarl. He should have never put her in that position, damn it. He’d let his jealousy overrule his common sense, and had failed to protect her. Jesus. He was such a fucking jackass!