“We didn’t have a very good conversation,” Seth said after a moment. His free hand smoothed over my cheek. “And I think he knew the moment he left that temple, we wouldn’t be talking.”
I smiled weakly and pretended I didn’t know that Seth was actually making excuses for Apollo. Because it wasn’t for him. It was for me, and I did appreciate it, but it didn’t erase the hurt.
My father had been on the absentee list nearly my entire life. He let my mom sink into mental illness that may or may not have been caused by him. He wasn’t there for me through so much, with the exception of one long, lonely summer. He . . . lied to me about my mother dying, and if he’d wanted to see me he would’ve. Seth wouldn’t have stopped him, and even if he had, Apollo could’ve found a way around him.
The ache in my chest spread, and I didn’t even know why it hurt so much, but as I snuggled into Seth and slowly opened my eyes, I realized that Apollo was my father by blood.
And blood . . . blood meant nothing.
Chapter 25
Seth
I wasn’t sure what woke me at first, and I was a little surprised that I’d even managed to doze off while Josie had straight up passed out around two in the afternoon. The ever-present concern for her had kept me awake, my thoughts whirling a mile a minute.
Where in the fuck was Apollo?
Three days had passed since I’d seen Apollo—four days since Josie and I had made our deal—and her bruises had either faded into a dull yellow or disappeared completely. Even so, she was still easily exhausted. No amount of sun I had her sit in seemed to make much of a difference. She’d sleep throughout the night, waking once and sometimes twice due to a nightmare, always a nightmare, and then she’d be dead on her feet by the afternoon. She’d gotten sick twice in the last three days, once before eating breakfast and once afterward. There was still no increase in her aether. It flickered rapidly within her.
On the outside, Josie was getting better, but on the inside, she wasn’t. There was no denying that, and no one, not even the high priestess, knew what to do while we waited for Apollo.
And I swore with each passing hour that if he didn’t come through with some way to get these bands off, I would end him the next time I saw him.
The day after I’d seen Apollo, I did take Aiden and Alex to Baton Rouge. They’d called me last night after coming up empty-handed. There had been no signs of the shades. If they had been there, they were long gone now. They wanted to come back here, and since I figured having them around couldn’t hurt, I did the poofing thing with them.
Even though I’d only been gone from Josie for about ten seconds each time, I hated it. Didn’t like it one bit. The Titans might not have had any idea where we were, but they had to be looking for us.
Blinking my eyes open just in time to avoid a flailing arm, I jerked back and then caught Josie’s hand before it connected with my nose. I rose onto my elbow and stared down at her.
A faint sheen of sweat had broken out across her forehead as her head twisted from side to side. Face pale and brow pinched, her chest rose and fell with too-quick breaths.
Another fucking nightmare.
“Josie. Baby,” I said, letting go of her arm and clasping her chin. “Wake up. Come on, wake up.”
The skin around her eyes tightened and then her lashes fluttered. A couple of seconds passed and those azure eyes were locked onto mine, full of confusion.
“Hey.” I trailed my thumb along her lower lip. The cut had healed, leaving her lips lush and perfect once more. I grinned even though my heart thumped painfully in my chest. “You’re okay?”
“Yeah. Did I wake you?” she asked sleepily, brows pinched.
Dragging my thumb over her cheek, I kissed her forehead. “You were having a nightmare.”
“I was?”
I lifted up and met her gaze. “You don’t remember?”
She stared at me for a moment and then sighed, averting her gaze to my shoulder. “I was . . . I was dreaming about being back there,” she said, and she didn’t need to elaborate on where “there” was. “I’m sorry. I—”
“You do not need to apologize.” Smoothing her hair back from her face, I guided her gaze back to mine. “Don’t apologize for that.”
Josie was quiet as she stared back at me, and I didn’t know what to say. Comforting her with words didn’t come easy, but I wanted my words to bring her ease so she could sleep without being haunted by what she’d experienced.
“What were you dreaming about?” I asked.
The corners of her lips turned down. “Just . . . just being stuck in that place and . . .”
“And what?” I leaned back on my elbow as she rolled onto her side facing me.
“It doesn’t matter. It was just a nightmare.”
“Joe . . .”
Her eyes rolled as she placed her hand against my chest. Her fingers were cool. “Whatever, Apolly-anna.” Her nose wrinkled. “Wait. I can’t even call you that anymore. No fair.”
I chuckled. “What a shame.”
She dragged her finger over my chest. “Did you go somewhere when I fell asleep earlier? I thought I felt you leave the bed.”
Surprise shuttled through me. I had left briefly so I could feed. “I met with Basil for a few moments.” Which wasn’t entirely a lie. I had met with him on my way back. Josie hadn’t asked about the whole feeding thing, and I was hoping she wouldn’t—at least for the time being while I figured out how to explain that I still needed to feed. “I’m surprised you even noticed me gone. You were snoring so loudly—”
“I was not snoring!” She slapped my chest. “That’s insulting.”
“It’s nothing to be ashamed of,” I teased.
She shot me a dirty look. “You’re a jackass.”
“You love me.”
“You’re lucky that I do.”
My damn heart clenched in response. Fuck. I couldn’t help it. I was lucky. Hearing her say that did things to me I couldn’t even begin to describe.
Reaching over, I tugged on the thin straps of the tank top she was wearing. I knew that, under the blankets, she wasn’t wearing any pants, and I struggled not to focus on that little fact. I was behaving myself. Toying with the strap, I thought about what Aiden had told me upon bringing him and Alex back. A community in East Texas had reported a larger than normal number of pures going missing. Hopefully that was our lead and Hyperion would be found nearby. I’d close out the week by turning that fucking bag of dicks into nothing but a smear on the ground. Maybe, if I killed Hyperion, then Josie wouldn’t be so haunted, so terrorized.
“You look like you’re about to break your brain,” Josie said.
I raised a brow, but the smartass response died on the tip of my tongue. “I want to help you.”
Her gaze flicked to mine as she placed her palm on my shoulder. “You are.”
“Really? I’m not so sure about that. You have nightmares every night, sometimes twice a night. You’re still exhausted all the time and you’ve been sick.” I drew in a shallow breath. “I just want to help you. Tell me how I can.”
Josie didn’t respond for a long moment, and I knew she was trying to think of a way to change the subject. Talking about her time being held captive wasn’t something she wanted to do. Couldn’t really blame her for that, but I also knew just how badly unspoken words and unwanted memories could fester.
“Distract me,” she whispered finally, running her hand up my chest and around to the nape of my neck. Her fingers slid through my hair and then over to my cheek. “Kiss me.”
I didn’t hesitate.
There was no way I could deny her.
Ever.
~
Josie
Seth lowered his head, his eyes lit from within by an amber fire. The moment his lips brushed mine, I wasn’t thinking about the way the packed, cold dirt floor felt against my skin.
The kiss started off sweet, a little bit of pressure that left me aching for so much more tha
n just a sweep of his lips on mine. When he started to lift his head, I caught him around the nape of the neck and held him there.
“More,” I whispered in the space between us.
His chest rose sharply. “Are you sure?”
I started to frown. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
Seth’s eyes searched mine. “You’ve been through a lot. I’m trying not to rush you into anything—”
Lifting my mouth to his, I cut his words off. He was startled for a second and held still. I wasn’t exactly great at initiating the whole kissing thing, but I touched the tip of my tongue to the seam of his lips and he opened immediately for me. I deepened the kiss, hoping to show him that what I needed right now was for him—for us—to be like the way we were before he left, before Hyperion reappeared. Since we’ve been reunited, all we’d done was kiss. Nothing more. He’d just recently started holding me in bed instead of making sure there was space between us. And I needed more.
Seth’s hand tightened on my shoulder, and I felt the tremble rock his body. I almost held my breath, fearing that he would pull away, but he didn’t. He made this sound that came from the back of his throat, a sound that was animalistic and purely sexual as he finally, really kissed me. His hand slid down my arm and found its way to my stomach. “Okay,” he murmured. “Distraction is something I excel at.”
“I think there are a lot of things you excel at.” Thrilled that I wasn’t going to have to beg, my bones liquefied as his hand coasted up over my ribcage.
His tongue flicked over mine, and he drew out the kiss until I was practically panting for breath, and only then did he lift his mouth from mine. He chuckled when my fingers tugged on his hair. “Like what? Don’t be shy. I love it when you list all the amazing things about me.”
His hand slipped over my breast, and I gasped. His nimble fingers made their way under the hem of my top and found the aching peak. “You’re . . . you’re really good at that.”
“But do I excel at it?” he asked, catching the nipple between his fingers and tugging gently.
Back arching, I moaned as I slipped my hand down to his shoulder. “Yeah. Yes.”
He dragged the neckline of my top down, exposing the area of his current fixation. “And how about this?”
Before I could respond, he closed his mouth around where his two fingers had been and sucked deep, hard. A strangled cry ripped from me as heaviness filled my breasts and tiny coils formed low in my stomach. Pleasure darted through my veins.
Seth lifted his head and moved to the other breast. His warm breath danced over my skin. “Do I excel?”
“I . . . I think you know the answer to that.”
His tongue flicked over my nipple. “I think I need to hear you say that.”
My fingers dug into his skin. “You do.”
He rewarded my answer with another swipe of his tongue and a quick nip that melted my insides. He rose, his tongue dragging across my mouth as his hand drifted down my stomach and the tips of his fingers slipped under the band of my undies. He stopped as his mouth played over mine, and for a moment, I worried that he wouldn’t go any further than kissing and heavy petting. But then his hand moved and one long finger was slipping over the very center of me.
“Oh God,” I whispered against his mouth.
“Yes?”
I laughed softly.
“I can already tell this is something you believe I excel at,” he said, voice deep and rough.
Running my hand down his muscled arm, I curled my fingers over his forearm. “I do. I really, really do.”
“Then I suppose I should prove my talents.”
Seth did just that, sinking one finger deep inside me. My hips bucked as raw sensation poured into me. His thumb circled and pressed down on the bundle of nerves as he eased another finger inside. His finger moved slowly at first and then he did something with that finger, hooking it in a way that caused me to lose control. No, that was a lie. I never really had control when it came to Seth and to this. I held onto his arm as I ground against his hand and clutched at the strands of his hair with my other hand. His kiss swallowed my cry of release.
My body collapsed back against the bed. For a moment I just lay there, letting the sweet aftershocks ripple through my body. He slipped his hand from between my thighs, and with half-open eyes, I watched him lift his finger to his mouth.
Holy crap.
Everything about me clenched. I reached for him, grabbing at the loose pants he wore. He came only so far, stopping as he hovered above me. “You’re not done distracting me,” I told him.
“Mmm?” He gripped my hip. “That was all about you.”
I tugged on him, wanting his body flush to mine, but he didn’t budge. “I want this to be about us now.”
He kissed me and then made that rough, raw sound again. “What I just did was about us,” he said.
I could feel his arousal against my hip, so I knew he wanted this—wanted me, but he was, like I had suspected, holding back. “Seth, I . . . I want you.”
His eyes drifted shut. “I will never get tired of hearing that.”
“Then let me . . . let me have you, all of you.”
Lowering his forehead to mine, he murmured, “Psychi mou, I want you to be ready.”
“I am ready.”
He didn’t respond, but his fingers brushed over my wrist, over the band. He didn’t pull my hand away, but he held it still.
My heart swelled and broke at the same time. “You’re not rushing me into something I’m not ready for,” I told him. “You never would, because I know . . . I know that I’m always safe when I’m with you.”
His forehead slid against mine. “You weren’t safe when I fed from you before.”
“You didn’t hurt me. I didn’t even feel it, and it was nothing like what happened when I was with . . . with them,” I told him. “And we already talked about that. Doing that without my permission wasn’t okay. Not by a long shot. But I’ve forgiven you and you’ve promised to never do it again without asking. And we’ve moved past that. I trust you, Seth. I trust that I will always be safe with you,” I repeated. “That you . . . you will always make sure of that.”
He froze for a moment and then said roughly, “I don’t deserve you.”
I cupped his cheek. “See, that’s where you’re being just plain stupid.”
A startled chuckle left him.
“You do deserve me,” I continued. “You deserve my love.”
No sooner did those words leave the tip of my tongue before his mouth slanted over mine, and I knew he wouldn’t stop this time. He wouldn’t ask me if I was okay, or worry that I wasn’t ready for this. We were so going to do this.
His lips moved down my throat, leaving a trail of hot kisses and tight shivers in their wake. Sensations raced over my skin, my heart sang, and this was better—
A knock on the door jolted me.
Above me, Seth nipped at my throat. “Ignore it.”
“Alrighty,” I moaned as I reached between us, wrapping my hand around the thick length straining through his loose cotton sweats. He groaned against my heated skin. I held my breath, and then his mouth closed over the top of my breast, and my entire body tensed and then jerked. “Oh gods.”
The knock came again, this time louder and more incessant, but Seth was still on the move, his hands shoving the blanket aside. I lost my grip on him.
“Seth!” Aiden yelled. “I know you’re in there.”
Seth’s head stopped about an inch from what was going to be his promised land. “If you do not go away, Aiden, I will physically and gleefully harm you.”
“Yeah, I’m going to have to risk that,” was the response.
A low growl emanated from Seth as he rose. “I’m so fucking warning you—”
“We just heard from Deacon.” Aiden’s voice carried through the closed door. “They’ve found the demigod that was in Canada.”