When I said nothing happened with Paul after all, I was sort of lying. Something did happen, just not the thing I told you originally. I tried to kiss him the night I babysat and he totally freaked out at me. That’s kind of why I ended up down the park with Aaron. I didn’t go there looking for him or anything. I just needed to get out of the house and I was walking past and there he was with his mates, and they were having a laugh and drinking beer and it looked like fun, and when he started paying me attention, it felt nice. I’m not going to pretend I was really drunk or anything because I wasn’t. I’d had a few beers but I knew what I was doing and I knew that it was wrong and I did it anyway. I’m not proud of it, not one bit, and if I could go back and undo it all, I would. I was just feeling really shit about myself and I stupidly thought going home with him would make me feel better.
I’m so sorry, Kimmie, please believe me when I say it. I was stupid and selfish and I don’t blame you for going silent on me. For what it’s worth, we didn’t actually do it. Not properly. I’ve never done it with anyone properly, not even Jordan. I’m sorry I lied about that too. It’s just that you all assumed we were doing it right from the beginning and I didn’t know how to tell you that we weren’t. It sounds stupid written down like this, but I was worried you wouldn’t like me as much if you knew the truth or that you’d think I was lame. I don’t know if any of this makes sense or not, or if it even makes a difference. I hope it does, at least a bit. I never set out to hurt anyone but I get that I have and I’ll do anything I can to put it right.
It all goes back further than that though, if I’m really honest with myself (and you). I know I act like I’m all confident and stuff, and most of the time I am, but sometimes I’m putting on a bit of a show, pretending I’ve got it sorted when deep down I don’t have a clue. Having sisters as amazing as Grace and Audrey makes it hard to feel special or stand out. I try not to let all their achievements get to me but it’s hard not to compare myself to them. I guess what I’m trying to say is, it’s not always easy being a Campbell-Richardson. I’m working on it, though. I’m working on everything.
I dunno what you guys are planning to do about Newquay. I’ve been looking forward to it all year and the idea of the four of us not going together makes me feel really, really sad. You probably still totally hate me and wouldn’t touch me with a bargepole, never mind share a caravan with me, but on the off chance you can forgive me, I’m going to be at the airport tomorrow. You can tell me to bugger off if you want to but that’s where I’ll be.
Finally, I ordered these T-shirts ages ago. I’ve had this fantasy about us wearing them on the plane. Just so you know, I’ll be wearing mine tomorrow.
Yours hopefully,
Mia xxx
39
The following morning, I set off for the farmers’ market forty-five minutes earlier than usual, a tote bag looped over my shoulder.
I head to Stella’s first. Stu answers the door in his underpants and a faded Nirvana T-shirt that smells like dead people.
‘Is Stella in?’ I ask.
‘She’s still in bed,’ Stu replies coldly.
‘Oh.’
I wait for him to tell me to go on up, like he would ordinarily, but he doesn’t.
‘Well, can you give her this?’ I ask, fishing Stella’s T-shirt out of the bag. ‘And this.’
I hand him an envelope with Stella’s name on it. Inside is a photocopy of the letter. I’m giving the original to Kimmie.
At Mikey’s, The Accident answers the door, his face covered with baked bean juice.
‘Mikey’s at Stella’s,’ Mikey’s mum calls from the kitchen.
‘Oh.’
‘Well, can you give him this when he gets back, please?’ I ask, handing her his T-shirt and envelope over the top of The Accident’s head.
At Kimmie’s, Sophie answers the door. The second she sees me, her eyes narrow into a glare. I’m guessing Kimmie has filled her in.
‘She doesn’t want to see you,’ Sophie says, her arms folded across her chest like a nightclub bouncer. I half expect her to follow up with ‘your name’s not on the list, you’re not coming in’.
‘Fair enough,’ I say, subtly trying to peek over her shoulder. ‘Could you make sure she gets these at least?’
Sophie hesitates before taking the T-shirt and envelope, peering at them suspiciously.
‘Oh, and could you tell her that Grace had her baby?’ I add. ‘A little boy. Elijah. And let her know if she wants to come over and meet him at some point, she totally can.’
‘I’ll tell her,’ Sophie says before shutting the door in my face. I take a deep breath and walk back down the driveway, wondering if Kimmie is watching from her bedroom window, but too afraid to look.
I’ve done all I can. Now I just have to wait and see if it’s enough.
Epilogue
‘Should we wait?’ Grace asks as she pulls up outside the terminal.
It’s painfully early, the sun only just up.
‘I don’t know,’ I say, looking up at the signs. ‘I’m not sure you can. This is drop-off only.’
‘But what if they’re not there?’ she asks.
‘Or if they totally blank you?’ Audrey pipes up from the back seat.
‘I don’t know,’ I admit. ‘I reckon I’m just going to have to chance it.’
I climb out of the car and retrieve my luggage from the boot. Grace and Audrey get out too, waiting on the pavement as I heave my rucksack on my shoulders and check I’ve got everything.
‘Your T-shirt looks really cool,’ Audrey says.
I look down at my brand-new ‘It’s All About Mia’ T-shirt.
‘Cheers, Auds,’ I say. ‘They came out good, didn’t they?’
‘Really good.’
‘Maybe I’ll make you one one day.’
‘Yes please.’
I turn to Grace. ‘Thanks again for driving me.’
‘No worries. Now, are you sure you don’t want us to wait? I could maybe park up somewhere else.’
‘Don’t be silly, you need to get back for Elijah’s next feed. Worst comes to worst, I can get the bus back. It’s only 40 minutes back to Rushton.’
‘OK. Well, fingers crossed, I guess.’
‘Yeah.’
She holds out her arms. I’m still getting used to seeing her without her massive baby bump. It’s weird, but I almost miss her funny waddle and her freaky pregnancy jeans and the smell of her disgusting red raspberry leaf tea. As she hugs me, I realize she smells of Elijah now, of milk and olive oil and freshly washed cotton. I turn to Audrey, hugging her just as tightly.
‘I should have recorded a clip of me snoring for you to play while I’m gone,’ I say as we separate.
‘You so should have!’
‘Maybe next time, you little weirdo.’
She grins.
‘I’d better go,’ I say, checking the time on my phone. ‘I’ve got to check in and all that.’
‘Like I said, fingers crossed,’ Grace says.
‘Fingers crossed,’ I repeat, taking a deep breath and heading towards the door marked ‘Departures’.
The airport is busy, crammed with stressed-out parents and kids riding Trunkis and groups of friends chattering excitedly. I look for Stella, Mikey and Kimmie. Maybe they’ve gone through to the gate already.
‘Is it possible to see if my friends have checked in if I give you their names?’ I ask at the check-in desk.
‘I’m afraid not,’ the woman behind the counter says, handing me my boarding pass.
‘OK, thanks,’ I murmur.
I go through security, then duty-free, weaving in and out of the displays of perfume and bottles of whisky and giant Toblerone bars, on constant alert for Mikey’s hyena laugh and Kimmie’s impossibly shiny hair and Stella’s embroidered denim jacket, my heartbeat quickening every time I see anyone even vaguely fitting their descriptions. It feels like everyone here is in a group, that I’m the only person in this entire airport who’s
alone.
I’m one of the first people to arrive at the gate.
The seats around me begin to fill up with families and loved-up couples and groups of friends, multiple versions of Stella, Mikey and Kimmie, but none of them the right ones. None of them mine.
There’s a stewardess now, checking the lists – it won’t be long now before we can start boarding. I’m unsure what do, whether I should board the plane alone or not, but resigned to the fact my friends aren’t coming.
That’s when I hear a familiar voice yell the immortal words, ‘Hold that plane!’
Mikey.
Seconds later, he, Stella and Kimmie career round the corner, all three of them red-faced and out of breath.
All three of them wearing their T-shirts.
All three of them looking at me.
I abandon my hand luggage and leap up. We collide in the middle of the lounge, bashing heads and knees and elbows. I don’t realize I’m crying until we separate from our messy hug and I see the damp patch on Mikey’s shoulder.
‘I thought you weren’t coming.’
‘Of course we were coming,’ Mikey says indignantly. ‘As if I saved up all my pocket money to stay at home.’
‘Stu’s car broke down about a mile away,’ Stella explains, her chest heaving up and down. ‘We had to walk down the hard shoulder with all our luggage. Nightmare.’
‘We only just made check-in,’ Kimmie adds, out of breath.
Her T-shirt is a bit baggy on her. ‘I knew I should have gone for an extra-small,’ I say.
‘No, I like it like this,’ she replies. Just like Kimmie.
‘I’m so sorry,’ I tell her. ‘More sorry than I’ve ever been in my life.’
‘I know,’ she says simply. ‘I know you are, Mia. Apology accepted.’
I start crying again.
Mikey plants himself in front of me. ‘Who or what are you, and what have you done with our friend Mia?’ he asks.
‘Oh, piss off,’ I say.
‘That’s more like it!’ he crows.
We start laughing then. All four of us at once. Me and my best friends.
And it’s the best sound in the entire world.
Acknowledgements
I would like to thank the following people for helping me conquer that ‘difficult’ second book.
The dream team: my wondrous editor, Bella Pearson, and my magical agent, Catherine Clarke. Your patience, encouragement and vision kept me afloat when I was convinced drowning was inevitable! To say you’re both a pleasure to work with is an almighty understatement. Thank you, thank you, thank you for not letting me give up on Mia.
Everyone at David Fickling Books. Your energy and commitment astonish me every single day. Special thanks to Carolyn McGlone for being not only being incredible at her job but also bloody lovely company on our various jaunts across the UK (long live our couples railcard!), Phil Earle for continuing to spread the word with such genuine and infectious passion, Rosie Fickling for her most excellent editorial notes and David Fickling for almost unnatural levels of enthusiasm and joy. As I’ve said countless times before, I’m so happy and proud to be a DFB author.
David Levithan for overwhelming kindness and generosity.
Alice Todd for another proper stunner of a cover, and Alison Gadsby for so much hard work on the design and layout. I can’t wait to hold a copy in my hands!
Lisa Rundle for taking the time to share her experiences of life as the mother of a budding young swimmer – your insight was invaluable.
My Monday-night writing-group buddies (Paul, James, Fiona, Chris, Maria and Sara-Mae), thank you for your thoughtful and always helpful feedback. Here’s to the next four years!
It’s no secret the UK YA community is made up of outstanding individuals, many of whom have become genuine mates. Thank you to everyone who has shared experiences, offered advice or been kind or supportive in any shape or form. In particular, Jenny Downham for countless wise words, Lucy Ivison and Non Pratt for being motivational, inspirational and hilarious in equal measure, and Jess Vallance for a bit of everything.
Second books are notoriously hard. Massive thanks to all my friends and family for their support/indulgence. Particular thanks to Gregory Ashton for being the ultimate brainstorming partner, Matt Phillips for his continued kindness and cheerleading, Katherine Jackson for the Wednesday-morning chats, Nikki Dibley for reading some early chapters and making the right noises, Hayley Rudd for being the housemate from heaven, and Jake and Isla Elliott, my little rays of sunshine.
Finally, Mum and Dad, for being, well, Mum and Dad. Mum recently expressed concern that people might read my books and assume the characters are based on them. Therefore I’d like to take this opportunity to state that my parents do not roll around on the living-room carpet snogging like Mia’s do (at least they don’t in front of me).
The Campbell-Richardson
Ultimate Wedding Playlist
1. Back for Good - Take That
2. I Wanna Dance With Somebody - Whitney Houston
3. A Little Respect - Erasure
4. Sex On Fire - Kings of Leon
5. Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It) - Beyoncé
6. Got My Mind Set on You - George Harrison
7. Walking On Sunshine - Katrina and the Waves
8. We Are Family - Sister Sledge
9. You Make My Dreams Come True - Hall & Oates
10. Higher and Higher (Your Love Keeps Lifting Me) - Jackie Wilson
11. You and Me Song - The Wannadies
12. Shake It Off - Taylor Swift
Also by Lisa Williamson:
The Art of Being Normal
Copyright
All About Mia
First published in 2017
by David Fickling Books, 31 Beaumont Street, Oxford, OX1 2NP
This ebook edition first published in 2017
All rights reserved
Text © Lisa Williamson, 2017
Cover Illustration © Alice Todd, 2017
The right of Lisa Williamson to be identified as author of this work has been asserted in accordance with Section 77 of the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.
This ebook is copyright material and must not be copied, reproduced, transferred, distributed, leased, licensed or publicly performed or used in any way except as specifically permitted in writing by the publishers, as allowed under the terms and conditions under which it was purchased or as strictly permitted by applicable copyright law. Any unauthorised distribution or use of this text may be a direct infringement of the author’s and publisher’s rights, and those responsible may be liable in law accordingly.
ISBN 978-1-910989-12-8
Lisa Williamson, All About Mia
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