36.
My eyelids were heavy, but I was awoken by the sound of my own breathing. As I slowly rolled open my eyes, I felt them burn. I swallowed hard to wash away the dryness in my mouth. When my eyes, finally fully opened and came into focus, I was greeted by a white room. Turning from one side of the wall to the other looking, my heart sank.
The first thought that came to mind, was that somehow they found me, and returned me back to the farmhouse. But that was impossible, I watched Paul Bishop die. Distraught and heart in pieces, I slowly raised myself from the bed. Curiosity was on my mind and the cat needed killing. There was a window in the room. It was the only thing that would give me my answers. As I placed both feet onto the floor, the cold floor, I grabbed the IV tower and used it for support. I took a deep breath and began my slow walk to the curtained window.
Finally reaching the window, I raised my right arm, shaking as I lifted it. I grabbed the edge of the curtain. I closed my eyes and took a moment to reflect. It was the moment of truth. I slowly raised my left arm and grabbed the other side of the curtains. With my eyes still closed, I took a deep breath, whisked open the curtains and waited a moment.
I gave myself, and old "please God," underneath my breath. Even though the view outside of farmhouse window was to die for, it was the last place I wanted to be. Like a little kid on Christmas, I slowly opened my eyes, waiting to be surprised.
My right eyebrow cocked upward and my eyes grew big. The yard was filled with a pool, rectangular in shape. The day was bright, clear, and filled with sun. The Palm trees were swaying in the breeze and people below me were taking laps in the pool, lounging in chairs, and just out enjoying the day. I slowly blinked my eyes and smiled. Tears began to stream from my eyes. Relief swept over me like a tidal wave. As far as I knew, I was alive and free. I took a moment to collect myself before I walked back to the bed and sat down.
Contemplation and thoughts began to plague my mind. I was dead. I had no ID, no identity. Whoever picked me up and brought me here, I had no idea what to say. I had killed two men in cold blood. I had killed before that. I didn't know where I would go, or how to start my life. The only plus was that I was not handcuffed to the bed, at least I knew I was not a wanted fugitive, yet.
Perhaps I could claim amnesia. Either way, at any moment, someone was to come through that door, needing answers. I figured, what the hell? I'd rather it happen sooner than later. Sitting on the bed, I raised my right shaking arm and pushed the call button for the nurse. I sat, with my back facing the entrance. I waited quietly and gazed out of the open window, watching the Palm trees as they danced in the light breeze.
Minutes after I depressed the button, the door opened then closed. I didn't turn my head to see who was there, no, I waited patiently, looking out the window. The presence inside the room was hesitant. I knew they were there. It wasn't until I caught a quick whiff of a familiar smell that my knees became weak. It was a smell that I had not been blessed by smelling in weeks. I realized that perfumes and body sprays were sold all over the place. Anyone and anybody can wear them. But this particular smell belonged to Paige. I, being a sniffer, was angered by the fact that someone else was gracing her beautiful smell. I took the initiative and turned my head, making sure to keep a stern and angered face. As soon as my gaze reached the eyes of my nurse, my facial expression eroded and became blank. I swallowed hard and blinked staring only into the eyes of my Angel.
Paige stood, clipboard in hand and covered in full nurse's garb. My eyebrows arched and my mouth slowly dropped. "What?"
She dropped her clipboard and came to me quickly, kneeling. She cupped her hands around my cheeks and began to kiss my face, everywhere. "My God, it is so good to see you up. I didn't think you'd make it, twice, we almost lost you."
Though both my arms were still shaking, I wrapped them around her, hugging. "You are a mother fucking, sight for sore eyes. I missed you so much!"
We locked in a tight embrace, our lips meeting, touching hard. Both of us held each other there, soaking in each other souls. I didn't realize what I truly needed in life until then. After everything I had lost, I still had Paige. I held her tightly, and kissed her hard. I touched my lips to her neck, kissed, and then breathed her in. I breathed all of her in.
"How did you find me? Why did you find me? I told you to leave, get out of town, and start over." I asked. My smile became a frown, and my eyes grew big, "Fitz, is Fitz okay?"
Still cupping my face with her hands, Paige pulled away. "Yes, Fitz is fine. My father and Clive left."
"So how did you know where I was?"
Paige was hesitant, but smiled. "As a certain precaution, Paul Bishop had a GPS tracking system inserted into your body. My dad was extremely distraught that I did not leave with him, but he knew why I wouldn't. I ran with the GPS trying to hide it from Paul. I followed you, taking some time before I lost Paul's tail."
My eyes narrowed. "I woke up one morning with a newspaper planted across my face telling me were Paul Bishop was, was that you?"
Paige nodded and smiled. "Yes, I couldn't encourage anything like that, but I knew you had your mindset. I hate to admit this? I don't condone killing, but Lillian what you have done, you released my father, Clive and I to a new life, and countless others to come." She wrapped her arms around me again and kissed my neck. "Lillian, we are free. Let's make the best of this, let's live life to its fullest!"
I pulled back a bit, trailed my index and middle finger between the collar of her scrubs. "What's with this, what's going on, what's happening?" I asked, kiddingly.
Paige smiled. "Well, since I am no longer employed by Mr. Bishop, I needed a job." Paige took a few steps back, and raised her arms spanning left from right. "This mighty fine establishment in which you currently reside, belongs to one great doctor known as Sebastian Cole."
I leaned back and cocked my eyebrow. "No Shit?"
Paige smiled. "I no Shit you, my love. This place is on the back burner to the world of the media. Celebrities come here to do things, make changes to their bodies. Since the curtains are open, I know you looked outside, but did you fully look at people's faces?"
I shook my head.
"Well, when you do, you'll notice some familiar faces from the big screen out there." She replied.
I sat for a moment quietly, staring at the floor. I could feel a subtle headache beginning to awaken in the back of my head. Took my hand and pitched the top of my nose, closing my eyes. "There's something different, I felt strange." Paige took a chair from the corner of the room and sat.
She watched me as my eyes fluctuated and my body language, its movements were different. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see her facial expression. She knew something was different about me. As she watched me fiddle with my eyes and struggle with my equilibrium, she spoke up. "Something happened to you when we brought you in."
I lifted my head, nodded and looked at her. "Yeah, you did say that I flat-lined twice? "
Paige looked at me, eyes wide and filled with concern. "Something else happened. Something that I cannot explain." She got up from her seat and began to walk to the door. Just as she touched her hand to the nob, she turned and looked at me. "I need Dr. Cole to explain this to you, because I cannot." I smiled and nodded, as Paige disappeared through the door.
I wasn't going anywhere. I had nowhere to go. I sat on my bed, staring at the blazing sun spot on the floor. I couldn't imagine what would be so freaky, that Paige could not tell me herself. I waited for some time, almost dozing off while sitting up. My stomach grumbled with hunger. I looked at myself up and down. I pulled up my gown and noticed the bloodied gauze where my two gunshot wounds had been. I felt an itching sensation upon my chest and between my breasts. As I pulled my gown up higher, there was gauze covering that spot to. My curiosity began to linger. I knew for a fact I was not harmed in that spot. Just as I was ready to lay back to catch some sleep, the door finally open. Dr. Cole stepped in first, Paige in tow.
Dr. Cole walked up to the side of the bed, and greeted me, pushing his glasses further up his nose. "Good afternoon Lillian, how are you feeling?"
"Good, I guess. Paige told me that you needed to tell me something?" I asked.
"Yes, there is something I think you should know about your implants." He said.
My eyebrows lifted. "My implants?" Honestly, I didn't see that one coming, but perhaps I should have.
He took a deep breath. He had a clipboard in his hand and he was thumbing through the pages, but he put it aside. He knew that he didn't need to look at it. "Lillian, something happened while we were resuscitating you." Dr. Cole hesitated. I got the impression that even he himself even could not explain what had happened. "While using the defibrillator, a bizarre reaction had occurred."
My eyes grew big and my jaw dropped, slowly. "Yeah?"
He cleared his throat. "Somehow, you were able to hold an electrical charge. When we hit you the first time, nothing. But when we hit you the second, a complete electrical charge expelled from your body, through the defibrillator and throughout the building. The lights flickered and we nearly lost power. I have never seen anything like it in my life.
It was some complete science fiction bull shit. It went from complete reality to straight up Star Trek. I couldn't believe what I was hearing, but the worst part, was that there was more.
Dr. Cole took another deep breath. "Paul Bishop told me that the material I inserted into your body was a high-tech titanium bio silicate. This is not the case either. After what had happened with the defibrillator, I took x-rays of your body. The bio silicate has expanded 25% more than what had first been placed."
"It's growing?"
He nodded. "Yes it's growing. After finding this out, I tried to pull a sample of it from your body." He pointed at my feet. "You'll notice tiny incision marks there by your big toe."
I lifted my foot from the side of the bed looked at it. There were tiny incision marks, a few of them in fact.
"I tried to pull some samples of the silicate. Exposed to air they were fine, but as soon I removed it from the body, it just simply dissolved. I had to find a solution in which I could put the silicate in so it would not dissolve. I was able to complete the simple surgery in a saline solution, as long as it was embedded into your DNA code.
I was still confused. "My DNA code? What are you saying, Doc?"
His eyes wavered. He was filled with answers but was still confused as I. "I sent the silicate out to be tested by experts. The material in question that is lining your bones is in fact alive. It has adhered to you. The silicate in question has 165 different compounds and many many enzymes that are not known to this earth. It is in fact now coded to your DNA, and if removed by force, by defense, it shall dissolve."
My eyebrow was cocked. I still had no idea what Dr. Cole was feeding me. "Doc, without all the technical bullshit, could you just tell me what's up?"
"Bottom line is, whatever I put inside of you, is in fact extraterrestrial in nature. The plus is, since we seem to have woken it up, it seems to be releasing a natural enzyme. You no longer need to take the cocktail."
I smiled. "Well that's good, because you know damn well I hate fucking needles."
"You don't feel any differently do you? Are you hearing any voices?"
"Feel differently, yes. Voices, no." I said as I shook my head.
Dr. Cole took a few steps to leave before he stopped and turned back to face me. "Oh, and one last thing? You seem to be emitting a signal."
My eyes narrowed once again. "A what?"
"A signal. A homing beacon. For whatever reason. Paige's GPS unit is picking up a new signal. It's picking up a signal, but it cannot be traced. We only knew it was coming from you because the log states it began at the same time we brought you back." Dr. Cole shook and scratched his head. "And about the whole electrical charge thing, don't be too liberal about that in public."
I looked at Dr. Cole and then at Paige. I said smiling. "Ooooh, super-freak in the house! I promise I'll behave, but you know I got to test this Shit out!"
As Dr. Cole left, I sat smiling and staring at Paige. She looked at me somewhat distraught. "And you find this funny?"
I lifted my shoulders and shrugged. "What? I am already dead. What does it matter?" I walked up to her as she sat in the corner chair, rested my fingers to her shoulder and began to walk them slowly down. "I'm excited, after all it's not every day that you get to find out that you're a superhero."
Paige smiled and her gaze moved to the tiny bracelet that graced my wrist. She took my hand into hers and began to inspect it. "This is new... On a mission to kill and you just happen to pick it up?" Her voice was filled with just a hint of suspicion and a dash of jealousy.
"Ahhh... Since you followed me, then you knew where I stayed"
Paige nodded.
I took in a deep breath trying to find the best way to explain it. "Well, her name was Dava."
Paige quickly removed her hand from mine.
Smiling, I shook my head. "It's not like that. Dava was an eight year old girl. Her mom sold her to a pimp and she was subjected to gruesome treatment."
"Ohh no." Paige said wincing.
"So, I beat the shit out of the pimp, and gave the girls as well as Dava another chance at life." I momentary stared off into space hoping they truly did. "Dava made it for me. As long as it permits, I will never take it off." I took a seat back onto the bed.
Paige got up and sat next to me on the bed, holding my hand. "You are becoming a superhero."
"Not after the things that I have done."
Paige's grip became more firm. "Even Xena had to go thru hell before she died a hero"
I turned to look a Paige. Grinning, I placed my eyes into hers. "Oh, so you are comparing me to Xena now?"
"Perhaps you have found your little Gabrielle." Paige said laughing.
Smiling and slowly moving, I took Paige's mouth into mine, slowly releasing her lower lip as I pulled away. "You are my Gabrielle."
The weeks extended themselves. I was healed and healthy. As Paige continued to work, I was continuously hidden and kept away like some dirty little secret. I was in limbo. I knew Paige and Dr. Cole wanted to keep me safe. I knew they were also afraid. Because of me, both of them knew for a fact that extraterrestrials were out there. I was living proof.
It wasn't enough for me. I couldn't just sit around waiting. I was alive and breathing and needed to live my life as well. When I was left alone, I'd experiment with what Dr. Cole told me. I placed my thumb up to an electrical outlet. I took a deep breath and thought. I could feel as the surge entered my body. I could feel the tingling, it's energy. I could feel myself growing stronger as I soaked it up. As I walked around, charged, I would expel it upon inanimate objects. Everything reacted differently from the discharge of my body. As days past, I perfected my new craft.
When I finally became sickened by my so-called captivity, I waited for the perfect moment. Everyone was busy, daily. Paige worked her ass off, I'd definitely give her that. She was gone most the day. If I was lucky we would share some meals together, but other than that, I was alone. I hated myself for being a freeloader. Lonely by day, the only comfort I would receive was from Paige at night when she laid next to me. I needed to move on with my life, I had to do something, but first I needed closure and to say goodbye.
I knew they kept their eye on me at first, but as soon as time went by, I became as bland and unnoticeable as the pictures that lined the walls of the establishment. Like the daily trash, I slipped away unnoticed. I took a few buses and I found myself saying goodbye.
It was a darkened day. I walked into the cemetery, not knowing where to go, but letting the feelings themselves guide me. As the rain started to fall in gentle sheets, I was guided to two tombstones which consisted of two names that I knew too well. Happy, but sad that they were both together. I read the tombstones out loud, hoping my mother was somewhere and knowing I was alive and well. I laid a rainbow ros
e upon her grave, and kissed the dirt which contained her lifeless, decomposing body. I looked at my tombstone and out loud read the inscription. "An explorer, loved, who died too early." I laughed at myself and allowed tears to run. I knew it was my mother who put that saying there. I could only imagine her, years before, sitting in the same place that I now stood, crying, heartbroken and distraught. On my knees, I bowed my head for some time. I could only think of the pain that I had caused. I had a superpower, but I wished it was a superpower to bring someone back to life. I cursed at myself for my inability to do so. I had nowhere to go and I had nothing to do, so I just stood there on my knees, embracing the wetness from the rain. I closed my eyes and wished I could hug my mother one last time.
I read my mother's tombstone over and over again. What my stepfather put on it was typical. The saying was true, but she deserved so much more. "Here lies, beloved wife and mother." I shook my head. It should have said, "a bright guiding light to us all, a woman of pure love and compassion. Her heart and her love kept us all going."
I knew I was there for some time, but I didn't care. I had missed three years of my life with my mom, and finally I was reunited. Comfortable on my knees, I felt the rain as it pelted down and beat down on my backside. I didn't care. I inhaled and softly began to sing Landslide by Fleetwood Mac. Both, for my mother and my father, for both were laid to rest. My father was not at the same Cemetery, but I would see him in time.
As I sat cross legged at the two graves, in the pouring rain, a car drove up. I didn't bother to turn and look, I just continued with my trance. It didn't matter, because I knew who it was. As I quietly sat, Paige approached from behind and rested her hand gently on my shoulder.
"You didn't tell us that you were leaving."
Ever since I had arrived at the clinic, and Dr. Cole realized what had actually been placed inside my body, I was under 24 hour surveillance. They kept it a secret to everyone but themselves. I knew they were frightened and I knew they wondered what I was capable of, but I got sick of hiding. I couldn't stand it any longer. I couldn't live my life in the shadows. Yes, there was something different about me, but for God's sake let me live my life before I go crazy. "Even if I told you I was going somewhere you would not let me go."
"True." Paige replied.
I didn't turn look at her, I just continued to stare at the stones. "I'm fine, in fact I have never felt better in my life. Please trust me when I say, you do not have to worry about me. All I want is a normal life. A normal life I want to spend with you." I said as I stood up and faced Paige. I took my hands and slowly blanketed her cheeks. As the rain poured buckets, I could barely see, but I knew the tears were there. "Don't let this hold us back." I began to tear up as well and smiled. "We're here, free and together. Let's make a difference. You and I."
Paige's eyes became turmoil, and I hugged her, bringing her in ever so closely. "I love you, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you." I took a chance and even though I did not have a ring, I knelt down on one knee before her. Last moments thought, I pulled my father's switchblade from my pocket and lifted it toward Paige. "Paige Jackson, will you take my hand in marriage, to love and to hold until death do us part?" I asked.
Paige smiled and the brown in her eyes became even more apparent. "Yes, yes I will!" She said as she gratefully took my knife.
We hugged. We held each other. I kissed her on the lips, neck, from head to toe. Holding her face in my hands, I pulled back slightly. "Only one problem. I'm kind of dead."
Paige smiled and kissed me gently on the nose. "It doesn't matter. Where there is love there is a way. We'll figure something out. For now, let's get the hell out of this rain."
I smiled and put my arm around her shoulder. As we walked back to the car, I turned and looked one last time, blowing kisses to my mother and myself.
As I sat in the passenger seat next to Paige, I smiled but regretfully said, "Sorry, I don't have much to offer... No job, or money."
As Paige started the car, she turned and looked at me with a half-smile. "Oh, I wouldn't quite say that."
"How do you mean?" I asked.
Paige held my hand and laughed. "You may not have any money, but the Switchblade Mamma, Well, let's just say she has a quarter mill from her winnings."
Life will always find a way. Even out the greatest destruction, eventually life would prevail. I had been through a lot. I had learned even more, about humanity, and about myself. A human being could be pushed so far, especially if they were trying to protect someone that they loved. I had reached so many breaking points. I had lost so much of my mind. I had lost everything, but gained so much more. No matter what, a hole would always remain in my heart, not to hold me back, but rather as a reminder to continue to move forward. As I moved forward with my new life, I would make sure that I would help those in need. There is no greater responsibility in the world than that of rescuing the weak from the fire. In the aftermath, the burn and the scar will always be there, but it's always a reminder of those who have been saved.