~~~
The sun was warm for the middle of March. Brennan figured he and Liam had a good chance of running into some rattlesnakes before they finished their hike in the Saddleback Butte State Park. Fortunately, neither of them were phobic of the shy creatures, and they would both enjoy the natural encounter.
"Red-tail," Liam said, pointing toward the sky.
Brennan glanced upward where a graceful hawk soared through the blue. "Wonder where the other one is." Red-tails mated for life and were known to hunt in pairs.
"I'll keep a lookout, but he could be a loner."
On top of the fresh air and physical exertion the hike afforded, Brennan was grateful it gave him a break from his hectic schedule. Both stores had been demanding the lion's share of his time over the past couple weeks. But he'd made a firm date to spend today with Liam.
He didn't want either his work or his screwup with Erica to interfere with his relationship with the teen. Admittedly, he'd recently allowed both work and his screwup to do so. When Brennan wasn't busy at the store, he was careful to avoid Erica. Which meant, at times, avoiding Liam.
She appeared to be doing her best to avoid Brennan, too. For example, she'd been conspicuously absent when Liam had run out to jump into Brennan's car two hours ago.
Now in thinking about her, Brennan had to bite his tongue—once again—from asking how she was doing. He badly wanted to know if she'd used the database he'd given her. He hoped she wouldn't scruple to take advantage of that resource. He was quite sure the list would help her find clients.
What he did not know, and did not bother asking himself, was why he cared.
Ahead, Liam came to a stop at a fork in the trail. "Are we taking the south or the north route?"
"Your call."
Liam lifted a shoulder. "Let's keep going up. North route."
"Sounds good." But inwardly, Brennan frowned. Other than his alert about the red-tailed hawk, Liam had been unusually subdued.
Brennan really should have made more of an effort to spend time with the kid.
Lately, it seemed as though there were a lot of 'should haves' in his life with respect to the Carmichaels. Brennan now wondered if he should have made such a panicked exit from what he'd begun with Erica. At the time, he'd thought he was taking a restrained, even heroic, path. But perhaps instead what he'd chosen was the cowardly, wimp-out path. Was she so potentially volatile? Was he so delicate? Yes, yes, it was better safe than sorry, but still—
But still— There was no way to go back and change what he had done.
Brennan called ahead to Liam. "When do you want to stop for lunch?"
Turning back, Liam gave Brennan his first grin. "Now."
"Bottomless pit. I always said that's your middle name."
"Think of it this way. Our backpacks will be a lot lighter after I'm through with them."
"True, true."
Liam pointed toward a scrubby live oak about twenty yards ahead. "How about sitting under that tree?"
"Sounds good."
They settled on some boulders under the oak. Brennan extracted the roast beef sandwiches he'd made and the bags of trail mix.
Liam got right to work on the food with the appetite of a growing teenager. But he didn't talk while he ate, which would have been his normal mode. By now, he usually would have peppered Brennan with a thousand questions about politics or handed him space trivia he'd gleaned from the Internet. Instead, complete silence.
Brennan concentrated on opening a Ziploc of mixed nuts and yogurt chips. "I could be wrong, but I get the idea maybe something's on your mind."
Liam glanced at him and finished chewing a bite of sandwich. "Yeah, sorta."
Calmly, Brennan opened his plastic bag and reached in for a handful. He wasn't so old he couldn't remember being a teenager himself. Besides, nobody liked to get pushed.
Brennan enjoyed two more mouthfuls of trail mix before Liam spoke again.
"Do you know there's a date now? For the guardianship thing?"
Carefully, Brennan swallowed while his heart picked up its pace. "You mean for the hearing?"
"Right. It's set for Thursday next week." Liam pushed the toe of his hiking boot in the dust. "It's kinda scary, you know? I mean, sure, Erica is going to get appointed and everything, but it's still a...fraught event." Liam glanced over toward Brennan with a brief smile. "Fraught. SAT word, right?"
Brennan chuckled. Meanwhile, he wondered where Liam was going with this. Perhaps he simply wanted validation it was okay to feel anxious. "Fraught, yeah. I can see that," he cautiously agreed.
"Well, see, here's the thing," Liam went on. "Erica's been great. She really has. Moving to Palmwood and all, but..." While his voice trailed off, his expression grew agonized.
"But?" Brennan hadn't a clue.
"But...she's not, like, a port in a storm, if you know what I mean. She's not even old enough to be my mother. And—" Liam's gaze averted and he finished in a rush. "I'd really like it if you could be at the hearing, too."
Brennan paused in the middle of chewing a cashew. The kid wanted him to attend the guardianship hearing? Horning in on Erica?
Perhaps sensing ambivalence, Liam returned his gaze to Brennan. "Please, Bren. I would just feel, you know, more confident if you were there. Like nothing bad could happen."
"I can't prevent bad things from happening." Brennan immediately shook his head. "I mean, nothing bad is going to happen." Damn. He didn't like handing out paper promises. But, really, what bad thing could happen—other than him being there and thus annoying Erica?
"Okay," Liam conceded. "But, still. You could handle it if something, you know, unexpected happened."
Tilting his head, Brennan narrowed his eyes at the kid. He sounded as if knew about something unexpected that might happen. "Such as...?"
Liam raised his shoulders. "I have no idea. But it's court, you know? I've never been in a real courtroom. And that home visit—" He mock shuddered. "I did not like that lady, poking into our business. It was totally insulting."
Yes, Brennan could see how it might have been. And he couldn't blame Liam for feeling apprehensive about a courtroom setting. But for Brennan to attend? With Erica? It would be completely out of bounds.
The woman had apparently adjusted her schedule to make sure she never ran into him while jogging, gardening, or going to the grocery store. It was unlikely she'd welcome him at so significant a family event as the guardianship hearing.
"I don't know..." Brennan hedged. He didn't want to expose the problems existing between himself and Erica.
Liam's gaze went pleading. "Please."
Was there a valid reason to turn Liam down? Embarrassment? Shame? Because he still thought about—and fantasized about—Erica?
Brennan released a long breath. "It has to be okay with your sister. She has the last word." There. He'd dropped the 'bad guy' role on her. How was that for acting like a responsible, recovered adult?
Liam's face lit. "All right. Thanks, Bren!"
Feeling like a complete fraud, Brennan accepted Liam's grateful hug. "It's up to Erica," he reminded Liam.
He wasn't sure if he wanted her to say yes or no.