“I met the Goddess,” the shadow caster said. “And she asked me to give you something.”
“And what might that be?” Draven demanded, instantly suspicious. The Goddess had promised retribution if he harassed her other children again. Not that he feared her but still, she wasn’t known for breaking her word.
Suddenly, the shadow caster appeared right in front of him and clasped his wounded hand with her own. She entwined their fingers, pressing their bleeding palms together.
“A soul,” she said.
“A what?” Draven tried to pull free but she clung to his hand tenaciously. “I don’t need a soul! And I don’t want one.”
“Nevertheless,” the shadow caster murmured. “Here I am.” She squeezed his palm and murmured, “Your blood and mine, mingled together.”
“Stop it!” Draven ordered but instead of obeying, the shadow caster looked into his eyes.
“Your gaze and mine, fixed to the same point, held to the same purpose,” she said, holding his eyes with her own, bewitching amber gaze.
“I said, stop!” Draven wanted to look away but there was part of him—a part so small he hadn’t even known it existed—that wanted to keep looking into those lovely golden-amber eyes. Somehow he couldn’t tear his gaze away.
The shadow caster leaned forward until her lush lips touched his. “Your breath and mine,” she whispered against his mouth. “Merged as one.” She kissed him gently and to Draven’s surprise, he found himself kissing her back.
Her lips were so sweet, so yielding and Draven felt something flowing between them—some connection that nourished his heart. It was like a sudden, drenching rain in an arid desert that hadn’t known moisture in over a thousand years. He drank her in, deepening the kiss, never wanting it to end.
When the shadow caster finally pulled away, her eyes were drowning deep. “Draven…” she murmured. “I never told you but my name is L.”
“L?” He shook his head. “I still don’t understand. Why are you doing this?”
“Because if I can be saved, you can too. But you have to make a choice.” Suddenly the knife in her hand disappeared to be replaced by a syringe filled with poisonous green liquid. “Sleep venom,” L said, seeing his eyes widen. “A little renders the body unconscious—the entire amount in this syringe will kill.”
“You can’t hurt me with that.” Draven gave her an amused smile, beginning to regain his footing. “I’m immune to every poisonous substance in the universe.” He frowned. “Well, except for skrillix venom. But that’s neither here nor there.”
“This isn’t for you—it’s for me.” Before he could stop her, the shadow caster plunged the needle into her own thigh and pressed the plunger down.
“What are you doing?” Draven felt a sharp stab of some emotion he couldn’t name—something he hadn’t felt for untold thousands of years—somewhere in his midsection. “Are you insane?” he demanded.
“I haven’t injected it all.” Already her amber eyes were fluttering and her breathing was more labored. “You can save me—if you want to. I’ve opened a link between us. Pour your will to live into me, merge your spirit with mine—take a part of my soul. It’s the only way to heal me.” Her eyelids fluttered again. “Or…or finish the injection. Either way, make your choice soon. I think…I think I may have injected a fatal dose after all.”
Her amber eyes rolled up in her head and her grip on his hand loosened. Without another word, she collapsed.
“L!” Draven caught her before she hit the floor and cradled her head gently in the crook of one arm. Quickly, he swung her up in his arms and carried her to the bed. Lying her down gently on the black satin coverlet, he assessed her condition.
She was breathing…but just barely. Her narrow chest rose and fell shallowly—so shallowly he could barely see it move. Looking down, he saw the lethal syringe still sticking out of her thigh. There was less than half an inch of the poisonous green sleep venom left.
Draven snatched the needle out and tossed the syringe away in one swift, angry motion. Then he asked himself what in the seven hells he was doing.
She’s nothing to me—nothing. I should have injected the rest of the poison and let her go. Why should I care if she lives or dies?
But that deeper part, the part so new and small and yet so strong he couldn’t ignore it spoke back. You care for her. You have from the first. You can’t just let her die!
Draven shook his head. If he did as she said, if he reached through their connection to give her his strength and take part of her soul in return, he would be a different creature. All the guilt for the horrible deeds he had done, all the pain and suffering he had caused, all the shame he had accrued over thousands of years of pillaging other planets would have to be faced. It would be beyond excruciating. The onslaught of emotions would be an exercise in pure, unremitting agony.
No, he thought. I can’t go through that, not even for her. Not even for the first female I’ve felt anything for in thousands of years. I can’t—
And then L stopped breathing.
* * * * *
L drifted in the blackness. Somewhere far in the distance she could see a familiar pinpoint of light, which she instinctively knew was her former life. She was floating in a featureless black void, tethered to that life by only the thinnest thread. Even as she watched, the speck of white seemed to get farther away.
Inwardly, she mourned for lost opportunities, for the life she had thrown away so recklessly, gambling on a long shot. But she had always known the Goddess’s plan was risky. It relied too much on Draven—on the hope that the shred of a soul he had regenerated would be enough to make him care for her. On the supposition that there was some good—however deeply buried—still left inside him.
Shouldn’t have done it, she thought as she felt herself being sucked deeper into the void. He doesn’t care enough. Not enough to save me. I’ve failed…
The thread that held her to the pinpoint of light finally snapped. So this was the end. She was lost in the blackness with no one to care for her, no one to pull her back. No one—
Suddenly a hand grabbed hers.
“What…?” L looked around uncertainly. What she saw surprised her—the white light of her old life was much closer and Draven was reaching through it, one long, muscular arm strained to the limit as he struggled to hold her.
And it was a struggle—the void wanted to suck her down and away, back into the blackness. It clung to her, inky black tendrils wrapped around her arms and legs and torso, unwilling to let her go.
“L,” Draven grated, still pulling on her hand. “Fight it! Come back to me!”
“I can’t.” She shook her head weakly. “I can’t move. The connection between us…isn’t strong enough.” She looked at the hand holding hers. Had his grip slipped, just a little? Already the light of her old life was becoming distant again.
“No! I won’t let you go, damn it!” Draven gritted his teeth.
“There’s only one way to strengthen the connection,” L reminded him faintly. “My soul—you need to take half of it.”
He swore violently. “That’s exactly what I was trying not to do.”
“You must,” L whispered. “Otherwise…” Her hand began to slip out of his, losing the tenuous grip that barely held them together.
“All right, all right—I’ll do it.” Draven looked grim as he tightened his grip. “But only if you promise to stay with me.”
L frowned. “Stay with you where? On Hrakaz?”
“Of course not.” He blew out a breath in obvious frustration. “I’ll have to spend years—millennia—making up for the sins I’ve committed and the wrongs I’ve done. I’ll probably be admitted to the Goddess’s realm, but only on a provisional basis. It’s going to be a long, hard sentence and I refuse to serve it alone. So I’ll take half your soul and your deal only if you promise to stay by my side and keep me company.”
L bit her lip. “But my sister, Lauren…I only just met her…?
??
Draven frowned. “I haven’t taken half your soul yet, my darling. Which means for all intents and purposes, I’m still a complete bastard. So choose—stay by my side and keep me company for the time it takes to compensate for my sins. Or die now. Hurry up and make your choice.”
L’s heart squeezed in her chest as though someone had put it in a vice. “Can…can I at least say goodbye to her?” she asked in a choked voice.
Grudgingly, Draven nodded. “I’ll grant you that, at least. But then you must come with me and live in the sphere the Goddess occupies, which is as far above the mortal realm as the top of the sky is from the bottom of the ocean. Do you understand?”
“Yes,” whispered L. “I understand.”
“L…” His harsh voice grew softer. “I’m not just asking this because I want a fellow inmate to serve my sentence with me. You were right about there being something between us. I just want time to explore it. I want time with you.”
L felt her heart warm. “I want time with you, too,” she said, looking into his silver eyes. “And I think my sister will understand.” She sighed. “All right, I’ll stay with you. Just save me and release your hold on those of the Kindred Mother Ship.”
Draven chuckled. “Adding to the bargain? Well, I don’t like it. But I’m sure I’ll be much more amenable once I have a soul and can feel guilt again.” He sighed deeply. “Here goes, my darling. This is going to hurt—for both of us.”
L gasped in agony as a piercing pain hit her somewhere between her heart and her navel. It was as though she had a box inside her, a chest hiding some precious treasure even she had not known was there. Now someone had gotten into that chest and was prying the lid open, seeking to plunder what was hidden inside.
It’s all right, she told herself, trying to breathe through the pain. You told him to take half. Just relax and let it happen.
Then there was a tearing pain—by far worse than the feeling of having her secret chest opened. An agony so great L screamed aloud, sure she was dying or being torn in half. Oh Goddess, she thought wildly. It hurts…it hurts so much! I can’t—
And then, just as suddenly as the pain had started, she felt it end.
“There,” she heard Draven say. His grip on her hand tightened again and then he was hauling her down, out of the blackness and into the window of light. L marveled at the sudden strength of their connection. He pulled her as easily as though she were a kite he’d been flying on a day that wasn’t particularly windy.
She opened her eyes to find herself in her physical body again, being held on the bed in Draven’s strong arms. He was looking at her with eyes that were no longer blank silver but a deep, emerald green. True green, L thought and wondered where the words had come from.
But even more surprising than his eyes was the vast pair of wings that now sprouted from between his shoulder blades. They reminded L of the wings she had seen on Counselor Rast, but Draven’s were even bigger and more sweeping. The air around their iridescent feathers seemed to sparkle with some repressed energy.
“Oh…” she whispered, awe overcoming her. She had Lauren’s memories of going to church as a little girl and seeing pictures of angels. That was what Draven looked like now—an angel.
A smile curved his lips. “Quite a transformation, isn’t it?”
“Yes. Yes it is,” L said and then realized something. “You…did you just speak inside my head?”
“Yes. And you can speak to me the same way if you want to.”
“I can? Oh! I can!” She looked at him in wide-eyed wonder. “How is that even possible?”
“I believe we now have what the Kindred call a ‘soul bond’.” He looked at her anxiously. “I hope you don’t mind.”
“No…” L closed her eyes, reaching within herself to where she felt his touch. Having him inside her mind felt both incredibly intimate and incredibly right. It seemed to fill a void inside her—a gap she hadn’t even known she possessed. Suddenly it came to her what had happened.
“I’m not lonely, anymore.” She opened her eyes and looked up at Draven in wonder. “For as long as I can remember I’ve felt isolated…alone. I don’t feel that way anymore.”
“I don’t either.” He smiled at her and stroked her hair. “Neither of us will ever be lonely again. Don’t you see, L? I’ve been waiting for you for thousands of years, waiting for you to set me free. And now you have—I thank you for that.”
“You’re welcome,” she whispered, reaching up to touch his face. It was amazing what the new eyes did for him. Before he had been devilishly handsome but also frightening, the blank silver gaze lending an air of barely controlled madness to his visage. Now she saw nothing but calmness, sanity and love in his gaze. And one more thing as well…sorrow.
“Draven?” she sent, testing out their new connection. “Are you all right? You look so…sad.”
“I am.” He shook his head. “I’m sorry, my darling. Now that I have a soul again, I also have a conscience. And I cannot help thinking of the horrible things I’ve done since I turned my back on the Goddess and left all goodness and decency behind.”
“You couldn’t help yourself,” L protested. “You had to absorb the evil of the…what was that thing again?”
He smiled and said aloud, “The Golgoth. But I can’t blame everything on that. I have to take responsibilities for my actions, and part of that is grieving all the harm I have done.”
L sat straight up in his arms as a realization hit her. “Oh my God—speaking of harm, you have to reverse the body swap you put on the Kindred Mother Ship, now. Baird was in the middle of having a baby when I left and Olivia was so upset! Not to mention what a mess everyone else was in!”
“Of course!” Draven closed his true green eyes for a moment and frowned. “Done,” he said, looking at her. “Will you please give my apologies to everyone aboard when you go back to say goodbye to your sister? I want to apologize in person but somehow I don’t think they’d let me on the ship.”
“You’re probably right,” L said dryly. “Yes, I’ll try. No one had died from the body swap at least—not when I left anyway.”
“That’s good.” Draven took a deep breath and looked around. “I have a lot of cleaning up to do and I need to start here. Hrakaz is a cesspool of living filth.” He sighed. “Do you know it was a pretty little world, full of greenery and clear streams when I first came? I perverted it—corrupted it and filled it with creatures that were abominations. Blasphemous mockeries of the gift of creation my mother, The Goddess, bestowed on me.”
“Then you need to start by putting it back the way it was—as much as you can, anyway.” L leaned forward and kissed him lightly on the mouth. “You do that while I go say goodbye to Lauren. When I get back…”
“If you come back, you mean.”
L frowned. “What are you talking about?”
He looked at her sadly. “I have a soul now, L—thanks to you. I’m no longer ruthless or shameless enough to demand that you stay with me for all eternity. We haven’t consummated our relationship or completed our bond. If you wish to live with your sister aboard the Mother Ship, I will understand.”
“But—”
“In time, as both halves of our souls regenerate, our bond will gradually fade,” Draven continued relentlessly. “You can find another male to be mated to—one who hasn’t got a past filled with murder and debauchery and violence.”
“Listen to me.” She put both hands on his cheeks and looked him in the eyes. “I don’t care about your past—I have a past too, you know! You think you’re the only one who ever shed innocent blood? Hell, I made a career out of it. But if the Goddess can forgive me and give me a fresh start, she can give you one too. And I’ll be there with you every step of the way.”
“All the same.” He put his hands over hers. “I want you to take some time—it’s going to take me a while to clean up the mess I’ve made here. So live with your sister on the Mother Ship—give yourself a month. I won’t a
scend to the Goddess’s plane until then—I’ll wait until I’m sure. And if you don’t come back…well…” He shrugged, his wings rustling. “Then I’ll know. And I won’t hold it against you.”
L sighed. “All right—I’ll stay with her a few days. We need some time to catch up anyway. But I said I’d be back and I will.”
“I hope so.” Draven pulled her close and kissed her gently, starting a fire inside that seemed to sweep through her and make her hot all over. “Be careful,” he said, when he pulled away at last. “I’ll be here waiting…and hoping.”
“I’ll be back,” L promised. And she meant it—she was ninety-nine percent sure she would.
Chapter Thirty-one
“Push! Push!” Liv encouraged her husband, holding his hand tightly as he bore down. His long blonde hair was matted to his face and his silver-gray eyes looked wild as he gasped and tried to obey her command.
“It’s coming!” Sylvan, who was still in Sophia’s body exclaimed. “I can see him—I can see the head!” He looked up. “Just a little bit more, Baird. Stay with me—just one more big push and—”
Suddenly the room spun around them. Liv found she was no longer leaning over her husband, encouraging him to push. Instead she was lying on the special birthing bed, her legs up in stirrups and a horrible pain inside that felt like it was splitting her in two.
“Ahhh!” she wailed in anguish. And then her body wanted to push—she couldn’t help it and couldn’t stop it. She pushed with all her might and something popped out of her like a cork from a bottle.
“Oh my God!” Sophie, who was suddenly in her right body, gasped. She was kneeling between Liv’s knees and barely managed to catch her squalling, red-faced nephew as he came into the world. “The baby!” She looked up at her sister and Baird who still looked as shocked as she felt. “The baby—I’ve got the baby!”