A slight pause, then I burst out laughing, my hand over my mouth to try to stifle it, followed by everyone else. I love this woman!
They all agree that we need to stay together, so they go and pack their things. Merrick tells them they only need to bring one vehicle, as we already don’t know where we are gonna put them all if this keeps up. They pile, arguing loudly about who’s going to sit where, into Cain’s Dakota and we’re off.
They follow us through the hills and out of the outskirts of town. They brought most of their supplies with them. Food and tools and a whole mess of shotguns, bless them.
Cain said he never stopped working at the coffee shop this whole time since the invasion. He has a familiar face to the town and must be immune to the Lighters speak because he’s been forced to listen to it daily at the shop and never fallen under the spell.
He said he watched as people’s eyes literally glazed over and that was it for them. After that it was ‘Keepers are evil’ and ‘Crandle will save us’. I remember that I never got a chance to talk to him about Crandle. I have a suspicion he is the Taker I saw that day.
He was certain, as he’d been doing it for months, that he could start doing the grocery shopping for us if we wanted him to. He could make up some story and was pretty sure they’d buy it as to why he needed so much. That is until the need warehouses, which per Cain would be in about two months. After that came to be, we were all up the creek without a paddle.
Jeff and Miguel are pulling in behind the store just as we are from the store and supply run and to our surprise, they have someone with them too.
A gorgeous little girl, looks to be about three or four years old. The blondest hair in ratty pigtails and the bluest eyes I’d ever seen. Her baby blue dress was torn on the bottom hem and her white shoes were scuffed and dirty, one sock pulled up higher than the other. She’s clinging to Miguel’s leg and has a doll in her hand with a missing leg.
My heart immediately jumps and I run over to see what in the world is going on as Merrick starts the introductions with Jeff and the rest.
“Hey, Miguel. Aren’t you gonna introduce me to your friend?” I say as I squat down in front of them to be eye level with the disheveled cutie.
“Sure, Sherry. This is Lily. Lily, this is Sherry. This is the nice lady I was telling you about.”
I look up at Miguel and see that he has a very strange expression. Something I don’t know him well enough to read yet.
“Well. Lily. Gosh, that’s a pretty name. How old are you?”
“Free,” she whispers as she tries to lift three fingers together, having to hold down two of them with her other hand, almost dropping her doll in the process.
“Three! Wow! Big girl. What’s her name?” I point to the mangled doll.
“Miwey. Miwey cuz of my Sister wuvs Miwey Cywus...She watches her on...on...TV. She use to,” she stammers through her explanation.
“I know who Miley is. That is very neat. Um... Lily? Do you think you might wanna come inside with me and get some milk? Maybe we’ll ask Mrs. Trudy about putting some chocolate in it too. That’s my favorite. What do you think? You wanna come with me?”
She looked up at Miguel and he nodded and smiled. She reluctantly let go and grabbed my pinkie and ring finger from my outstretched hand in her little grasp, all the while looking back at Miguel to make sure it was still ok.
I look back too and he looks at me with that same look as before and mouths “later” to me as I nod and head inside.
Later that night after everyone was getting situated and introductions had been done, Lily had her milk in the kitchen with Mrs. Trudy. Trudy was in a upheaval of emotions over the little girl. First she look excited, then distressed as she accessed the little girl’s appearance. Then changed to intrigued at possibilities, then flabbergasted as to what we were going to do with her.
I peeked out in the commons room and saw that everyone was already loving the new people.
Pap and Maggie are a big hit and everyone is rolling laughing at something one of them has said. I can already hear them start to bicker back and forth. I laugh to myself at the amount of entertainment we’ll no doubt gain from those two.
Simon and Max are already hunkered down in a corner, telling Keeper stories no doubt. They seem to be the more serious Keepers of the bunch.
Then I hear Merrick calling my name in my mind, then Jeff. I found him and Jeff both talking to Miguel and Cain by the stairs.
“Hey, Sherry. I hear ya’ll had an exciting day,” Jeff said but he sounded so drained and upset, not like Jeff.
“Yeah we did. From the looks of it you guys did too. What happened? You both look terrible. Are you alright?” I say, glancing them over.
“We’re fine,” Miguel said and Jeff said, “We’re ok.” Both answered at the same time. Then Jeff again, “Don’t worry about us, Sherry. We’re fine.”
“What’s up with the little girl?”
“Sherry. I’m not sure I want to tell you. It was pretty...” he swallowed, “...awful.” Jeff looked at me with such a look I knew I better take his word on it.
“Ok. Don’t tell me, then. So, she was alone?”
“No. Not alone. She was with... The Lighters can’t control babies and small children so...the humans were using her as a fetch girl. Getting them drinks and food from the kitchen, cleaning up their messes. That’s all I’m gonna say about it. Miguel snatched her up and we ran out of there. We did manage to get the food first though.”
I tried to keep my expression under control. A ‘fetch girl’? Cleaning? What the heck was that? She was only three years old.
“What happened to her parents?” I asked but regretting it as soon as I say it.
Sherry...don’t. You don’t want to know this.
Merrick warned me in my mind and I knew that he had seen what Jeff was referring to in his head and knew I would want no part in knowing about it.
“Those were her parents, Sherry. She had a sister too but...” Jeff stopped and him and Miguel both winced, then Jeff changed the subject. “And the worst part is, she’s a Special. I have no idea where her Keeper is.”
Jeff stopped and blew an exasperated breath. I think that they must not have seen much human suffering either as Keepers. Always looking after their charges. Miguel stepped in to finish the explanation.
“She was eating out of the trash behind the boozer, the uh club, in town near the grocery. When we found her, she looked worse for wear so I asked her where her parents were and she told me they were out having a blue.”
I’d learned from previous conversations with Miguel that a blue meant fight. He continued.
“Anyway. She was so dirty and alone in the alley and there were dead rats and... She said she hadn’t eaten anything since yesterday so we-”
“Ok. Ok. You’re right. Don’t tell me more. So she’s gonna stay here with us right? There’s nothing else to do. We can handle this. We can handle a little girl. She is awfully adorable...” I shake my head and clear my throat. “So. Anyway, I see you’ve met Cain. He’s pretty useful with all his knowledge of the way things are now. The town and things like that. He works at the coffee shop. This here is the guy you need to speak to.” I said, mock punching Jeff in the chest. “Jeff’s our main brain in this joint.”
I was trying in vain to steady my voice, thinking about the little girl...and what would make them wince about her sister. No! Stop thinking about it.
“If you wouldn’t mind, Cain, maybe you can tell everyone later of some of the things going on that we might need to know about. Fill us in on the way things work now. Some of us have been locked up down here for quite a while and no idea what’s going on anymore,” Jeff asked.
“Yeah, sure. No problem. Um...Sherry? Could I talk to you a minute?” Cain said, immediately grabbing my elbow and pulling me away before I can even answer.
“Sure.” He drags me to the corner of the commons room. “What is it?” I ask, wanting to push his hand off but he
looks so serious I can’t seem to be too agitated.
“Well. I wanted to make sure you were ok with everything. With me. About earlier, I’m sorry. I really thought it would work and it did work but, I would have never kissed you had I known you were married.”
I give him an amused look.
“Cain. It’s fine, really. We’re alive, that’s what’s important right? I promise. No harm done.”
“Ok. Good. Well, there’s more. Um...about that little girl, I know the people who had her. Her parents. I’ve seen them come into the store with her before and believe me, she looks way cleaner and less...um...bruised now than she usually does.”
“What?” I say but the tears in my throat choke out the force behind the effort.
I glance over to see Merrick looking at me, checking to see why I seem to be so agitated so I just send him a reassuring smile, half hearted.
“Yeah. And there’s still more. The people they’re with are big Crandle supporters. Like rally starting, hideout burning, resistance killing kinda people. You better hope that they didn’t recognize your guys or follow them. It would be very, very bad, for all of us.”
“Ok. I can’t believe this. Who would-” I grab my chest and blow out an exasperated sigh. “I’ll let them know to be on the lookout. And hey...thanks. For coming with us, and for saving me back there,” I say and roll my eyes at him to show I’m joking as I go on. “As awkward as it was, thanks. I know you meant well.”
“Anytime. I mean...no problem, Sherry.” He says looking bashful, making me want to laugh in spite of myself. “Really. Now let’s go tell your boys that they better watch their backs next time they head into town.”
The Lily of the Valley
Chapter 2
Now these days. It’s all about Lily. That little girl is toted, tickled, carried piggyback and any other way she’d prefer, bathed, entertained, kissed, played with, sang to, fed and cooked for, and any which way you put it, it’s all about Lily. Spoiled rotten by the underground resistance non-conformists misfit gophers.
I admit that she is the most precious thing I’ve seen since My Little Pony. But we can’t hardly even get any work done down here anymore for people wanting to cater to that sweet little face and her every whim.
Trudy has taken the grandmother role and she’s serious about it. You must go through Trudy before you interfere in any way with that child. It’s absurdly hilarious!
Lily does like me an awful lot though. I’m just likeable I guess though I never seemed to be that way before. Pre-apocalypse I was an invisible unlikable heap of a mess. Post-apocalypse everyone wants to be my new friend...or date me, whatever. It’s a switch, but it’s growing on me.
We give everyone a couple days to cool off and settle in and then we call the meeting. Lily and I had been pretty much inseparable unless Trudy or someone else was trying to tote her off. She was a talkative little thing and very smart and articulate for her age.
We settle down for the meeting with Cain. The most fascinating thing to the Keepers is that Cain is a Special, but yet he is working everyday and yet has had no run-ins or problems because of it. Lighters can sense Specials when they are near them and spend a great deal of time to find them so for Cain to be immune to the Lighter speak and be undetectable is a big deal, though they have absolutely no idea why he would be that way.
Lily sits in my lap during the meeting with Cain, as he explains all about the world today. I can’t help but touch and braid her hair. So soft and sweet smelling.
I was never much for dolls growing up and even if I had been, mom wouldn’t have allowed that one. Barbie was a political conformist with an unhealthy body image. You know.
“Shawwy?” Lily says as she always says my name. “I wish my hair was bwown wike yours. Den we’d match and you could be my new mommy.”
Somehow, even though there was talking going on everyone heard her comment and stopped what they were doing to stare at the innocent girl who spoke her mind so freely. My heart wrenched and twisted in my chest. Then she hugged me as she spoke.
“Maybe you could be my mommy, you do things wit me. My wast mommy didn’t do things wit me.”
I could feel her need to feel real love pouring out of her, begging. I couldn’t help myself, wedged in between the couch arm and Trudy, with Lily facing me on my lap and no where to go with my heart breaking for her. I started to cry. Right there in front of everyone.
I hated it, because I could see everyone else wanted to break down the same as me but her comment hadn’t been directed at them, and a few understand that I’ll never had kids of my own, because I’m sterile. I’ll never hear that word ‘mommy’ for myself.
I could feel Trudy’s hand on my back and Merrick’s thoughtful eyes on me as Lily spoke again.
“Shawwy. Why are you cwying? I cwy when I’m sad, when mommy leaves me alone.”
Again with the gut wrenching. So painful. The audacity of people to have children then treat them this way!
“Lily,” I spoke though my tears, as Danny handed me a tissue and some of the others began to simulate a sense of business so as not to stare. “I’m sorry that your momma did that to you. That was wrong of her. But you’re safe now. Me and Jeff, Trudy, Miguel, Merrick. We won’t let them hurt you anymore, ok?”
“Is dat why your cwying? Are you scarwed of dem, Shawwy?”
“No, I’m not scared of them,” I said through my sniffles. “It’ll be ok. We’ve got a lot of big strong men down here to keep us safe. Look. You see Mr. Cain’s muscles?” I pointed and he made a show of playfully flexing his arms and making faces at her which she laughed whole heartedly at. “See? You’ll be safe. Don’t worry about those people anymore, ok?”
“Ok, Shawwy. I’ll tell Miley not to be scarwed too.”
“Ok. That’s a good idea.” And she yawned and leaned her head against my chest as thankfully, Jeff and Cain started the meeting again.
All I could do the rest of the meeting, was lean back with her and try not to cry anymore.
Jeff thought it best to give Lily his room, the one next to mine and Merrick’s so he moved down to the new hall and showed all the newbie’s where everything was down some of the new ‘tunnel halls’ as they were affectionately called.
I tucked Lily in to her new room as she continued to yawn. I wasn’t sure she’d even sleep in her own room by herself, but tonight she didn’t put up a fight at all as she seemed exhausted and fell right out. The first night here she slept in Trudy’s arms on the couch and the next night my arms on the same couch with Merrick at my feet.
We decided to try it and it worked so we turned in too, cracking her door and watching for a few minutes like two worried parents of a newborn. It was fantastical. So this was what it was like to be a mommy. Somewhat. A glimpse. And it was wonderful.
Merrick didn’t speak as we laid down to sleep. I knew what he was thinking but he knew I didn’t want to talk about it. Nothing to talk about really. I’ll never have kids and that was that.
He just laid behind me and feathered reassuring kisses over my neck and shoulder as his arms circled me. I was entirely grateful to him for being so perceptive and understanding of what I needed. And as his warmth surrounded me I drifted into a sound sleep.
The morning was strange. Everything seemed to be blue. No walls, no floor. Like a cloud or water. Baby blue. And it was so quiet. Too quiet.
I looked over and Merrick wasn’t there. In fact. I’m not even in our room. I’m outside on the grass and there’s sunshine and clouds all around me. But the grass is green and all the grass I’ve seen is dead now.
I’m wearing some kinda odd off white silky nightgown down to my ankles and my hair is braided over my shoulder. As I look around I see someone coming. Merrick?
No.
But someone handsome and wearing a white button up shirt with tan khakis and no shoes.
He’s somewhat tan and his smile is blinding. His short dark brown hair is spiked to the side stylishly and h
is green eyes are piercing. The closer he gets I realize he looks familiar to me but can’t place him. He reminds me of a movie I saw when I was younger and I thought the man would be my dream husband one day.
And then I see Calvin come out from behind him with a gleaming smile and bouncing around happily. They sit in front of me on the grass.
“Hello, Sherry,” the man says deeply as he plucks absently at blades of grass, his long legs stretched out beside me.
Up close I see Calvin’s hair is combed neatly too and he is looking at me expectantly. Oh right. I’m supposed to say something.
“Hi. Who are you? Calvin? What’s going on?”
“Who I am is not important, Sherry. Calvin is here. He is important to you, no?”
“Yes, of course he is.”
“I’m here to show you what it can be, Sherry. What you can have. Do you find me attractive?”
“What?”
What the...?
“I know that you do. And Calvin? Do you not love him, as a son?”
“Of course I love him, but what does this have to do with anything?”
“I want to show you your life. With me,” he says, then little Lily pops out of nowhere from behind him and jumps in my lap.
“Pwease Shawwy! Say yes!” Lily squeals wrapping her arms around my neck.
“Say yes to what, Lily?”
“To our new life, Sherry,” the stranger answers for her. “You can be the mother you always dreamed of and be somewhat of a queen as well. A leader. Come. Take my hand. Be with me. With us. Be a mate to me, mother to the children and inspiration to the world. I can always be this to you, Sherry, look this way if you so chose it. This can be your fantasy come true. Come,” he pleads and extends his hand to me.
For the moment, I ignore it but...
He is so soothing and everything is so calm and the blue everywhere seems to flex and swirl around me like wind but I can see it. The swirls and lines in the air.