"I think you're wise. We really are quite protected and

  secluded here, but you're big news." Lucinda's voice was dry,

  and this wrung a smile from Stacy.

  "I came up because I wanted to remind you that Roddy

  and I will be away for part of the day tomorrow. Roddy has

  some property he must check on, and I said I would go with

  him."

  "We'll be fine. Roddy found a trunk of old toys. Hettie is

  cleaning them, and by tomorrow Drew will have more treasures

  than he'll know what to do with."

  "Good. I've asked cook for a special meal tonight to shake

  off your feeling of captivity. We won't be around until late

  afternoon tomorrow, so this will be your official welcome-to-London

  feast."

  Lucinda's voice was so dramatic that Stacy had to laugh.

  Drew, not to be left from the festivities, wanted to be in his

  aunt's lap. Lucinda cuddled him close and sang a silly rhyme in

  his ear. The three of them passed a fun hour before Craig

  came to say that lunch was served.

  216

  Tanner had been in London for two days, and everywht

  he went, people gawked in his direction and whispered

  was not one who paid the slightest attention to gossip, ev

  when it concerned him, but this was affecting his purpose ]

  being in town and that was getting on his nerves.

  He had come to London on business just the day befoi

  and within the hour had learned that his wife was in town;

  well. The gossip mill also said she was accompanied by a sms

  boy.|

  Planning to stay about a week, he was swiftly changing his I

  mind. He had nearly decided he would tell Edmond to finish-I

  the business and take himself back to the solitude of Winslow I

  when the questions began.

  Could he really leave London knowing she was here?

  Could he have Stacy this close and not see her? What did she

  look like now? How could she come back to London with

  another man's child? Tanner felt such a mix of emotions that it

  staggered him. One minute he was livid with remembered

  pain, and the next moment he thought he must talk to her

  before he could possibly go on.

  It was early afternoon when he made his decision. After

  all she was his wife; he would see her if it pleased him to do so.

  Her presence in London was disrupting his whole life, and he

  had rights. Maybe he would send her out to Winslow until life

  could right itself again. His mansion was huge; he never had to

  see her if he didn't want to.

  Tanner suddenly remembered the boy. Rumor had it that

  he looked like a Richardson, but that was ridiculous. No doubt

  the boy would prove to be nothing but trouble. But if he knew

  Stacy, and he believed he did, she would never consent to

  giving the child up.

  Tanner ordered his carriage and found himself consumed

  with thoughts of Stacy all the way to Brentwood He finally

  admitted to himself that he had missed her. He hated himself

  for the weakness, but it was true. To fight the feeling, he grew

  angry.

  217

  P By the time he arrived at Brentwood he knew exactly what

  jwould do. He would send Stacy to Winslow, but this time he

  told be in control. If he wished to see her, he would send for

  r, but outside of that she was only his wife. She would do as

  : was told and live where he told her to live. Right now he

  nted her at Winslow. The boy came to mind one last time,

  Tanner pushed him away. He would deal with the brat

  ;n the time came.

  Drew's attitude had been poor at naptime. He had been

  nearly delirious with the toys Hettie had produced, and by the

  time he needed to eat lunch and nap he was totally spent. He

  had been quite cross with his mother when she wouldn't

  allow him to sleep with every toy Hettie had cleaned. When he

  spoke back to her repeatedly, Stacy had been forced to paddle

  him--something she hated to do. Drew had been quite

  repentant afterward, and they'd prayed before he'd fallen

  asleep.

  Now Stacy was in her own room, much in need of rest

  herself. She didn't lie down but made herself comfortable in a

  chair that sat by the window. She gazed out the window at an

  area that was nearly like a forest. It was one of Stacy's favorite

  views, so unlike many parts of London with its sewer-lined

  streets and filthy houses.

  She pondered the view for a time, but she was tired Her

  eyes were sliding shut when her doorknob turned. She looked

  up in surprise. No one had knocked. Thinking it was Drew, she

  began to rise, Stacy was standing in front of the chair when

  Tanner pushed the door open and walked in. She froze in

  place when he pinned her to the spot with his dark, compelling eyes.

  Before either of them could speak, Craig appeared and

  218

  219

  hovered anxiously in the background. Stacy glanced to

  him in an effort to tell him she would be all right. She v

  certain herself, but she knew that Tanner would only

  him away, and none too gently.

  "My lady?"

  "It's all right, Craig." Stacy found her voice and watched;

  the elderly servant exited reluctantly. He closed the dc

  soundlessly behind him.

  Stacy looked back at her husband and forced herself t

  breathe.

  "Hello, Tanner."

  "Stacy." His disinterested voice belied the way his heart

  leapt at the sight of her. "What brings you to London?"

  "My grandfather died"

  This gave Tanner pause. This particular bit of information

  had not reached him.

  "I'm sorry for your loss."

  "Thank you."

  "But that still doesn't answer my question."

  Stacy, unable to take her eyes from him, finally shrugged

  rather helplessly and then stared at the floor.

  "Lucinda and Roddy wanted me to come, and I felt it was

  best at the time."

  Stacy heard footsteps, and her eyes flew up to find him

  approaching. If he was trying to intimidate her, it was working.

  He stopped just scant inches in front of her and stared

  down into her face. Stacy was amazed at what she saw. Tanner

  still cared. He tried to show her otherwise, but Stacy had

  caught the slightest glimpse of caring.

  "What are you thinking, Anastasia? Afraid I'll kiss you?"

  Tanner's deep voice questioned softly.

  Stacy couldn't answer.

  "You are my wife," Tanner told her as if she was the one

  who'd forgotten. "I will kiss you whenever I feel like it. Do you

  understand?"

  Stacy could only nod.

  "Tell a maid to pack your things; you're coming to Wins-v"

  Tanner's voice had turned curt as he abruptly turned

  ay.

  "You want me at Winslow?" Stacy found her voice.

  "Did I not say as much?" His impatience was evident. "A

  irriage will be here for you in two hours." Two hours! Stacy nearly panicked. She said the first words

  came to mind

  n "I have a son."

  |f Tanner, who had been heading toward the door, stopped
/>
  f In his tracks. He turned with maddening slowness and stared

  at Stacy.

  "I'd heard as much," he said in a voice that was stone cold

  f "I suppose you may bring the child, if he causes me no

  trouble."

  Stacy was horrified at his words and tone. She was on the

  verge of refusing him as it was, but he went on and Stacy

  completely lost control.

  "Who knows," Tanner said with a negligent shrug as he

  again turned to the door, "maybe I'll grow to like the boy and

  get rid of you."

  "No." The word was spat out, and Tanner turned in amazement.

  No longer was Stacy standing frightened before him.

  Her hands were balled so tightly in front of her that they were

  white. She was trembling from head to foot, her face flushed

  with rage.

  "You'll not take my son. He needs me, and I won't let you

  take him. I won't go with you. You can't make me. You'll not

  take my son from me." Her voice was furious and desperate,

  and in just a few strides Tanner covered the distance between B them, his own anger completely gone, replaced by something

  he could not define.

  "Stacy," he spoke with more calm than he felt, his hands

  grasping her upper arms. "I won't take the boy."

  "No, you won't!" Stacy was still beside herself.

  "I won't separate you from your son."

  "I won't let you. I won't let you hurt him."

  220

  "I won't hurt the boy or take him from you."

  Stacy stopped long enough to listen to him and study r

  eyes. She went on, still boldly, but her tone was calming.

  "Promise me, Tanner. Promise you'll not take him fr

  me."

  "I promise, Stacy." He gave her a little shake to make sun

  she was listening. "He can come with you to Winslow, and I'l

  not hurt him."

  Stacy took a deep breath and tried to relax and believed

  him. Tanner felt her nearly violent trembling under his hands,

  and grew angry at himself for wanting to enfold her in nisi

  arms. He had thought it would be such a pleasure to hurt her as

  she'd hurt him, but it was not turning out that way at all.

  With another abrupt movement, he dropped his hands

  and turned away. "You and the boy will be ready to leave in

  two hours."

  Stacy's hand flew to her mouth.

  "Tanner." Her voice was now fearful and subdued.

  "What?" He turned back with his hand on the door, his

  brow lowered menacingly,

  "I'm not certain I can leave just now."

  "Are you telling me no, Anastasia?" His voice was so low

  and angry that Stacy could barely force the words from her

  throat.

  "No, it's just that I need to tell Roddy and Lucinda goodbye

  and explain where I'm going. They're not here right now."

  Tanner seemed to consider the idea. "When will they

  return?"

  "Not for several hours."

  Again Tanner paused. "A coach will be here at 8:00 tomorrow

  morning. Be ready, Stacy. I don't want to have to tell you

  again."

  He didn't wait for an answer this time, and since Stacy's

  legs gave out as soon the door closed, she was glad the chair

  was directly behind her.

  "He terrifies me just as he always has," Stacy said out loud

  221

  rthe Lord "I haven't changed at all. I was going to be so

  )ng, Lord, and I was terrified."

  Defeat washed over Stacy as she prayed and tried to calm

  self. She had asked God to open a door, but she never

  imed it would be like this. This door had brought the north

  rind As Stacy quieted, God reminded her of His sovereignty,

  mer's arrival was no mistake. This was the door God in-;nded,

  cold wind and all. Believing that, Stacy would meet

  ic challenges beyond that door with hope.

  She sat for only a moment longer until she realized how

  jmuch work needed to be done. She gathered both Hettie and

  $Rayna in order to explain the situation. Hettie was to travel

  with her, but not knowing what Tanner would want, Stacy did

  not feel at liberty to ask Rayna to accompany them. Both

  women were clearly disapproving of the move to Winslow, but

  Stacy, needing both of them to pack for her and Drew, ignored

  their looks. Her husband wanted her back. She had no illusions

  of paradise, but at least Tanner wanted her at Winslow.

  Tanner suddenly found himself with nothing to do. For

  over an hour he paced the study floor at his town house. He

  would not leave London until he was certain that Stacy was on

  her way to Winslow. He now wished he'd forced her to leave

  on the spot so he could get on with his life. He was a fool for

  letting her change his mind.

  The smell of her skin and bath oil suddenly assailed his

  senses, and Tanner looked down at his hands. She had felt as

  wonderful as ever. Her eyes, so huge and blue, had been just as

  he remembered--with a mixture of wonder and innocence.

  Not wanting to dwell on this, he forced his mind to move on.

  Her reaction to a comment he hadn't meant scared him.

  He'd never seen her that way. He'd heard that motherhood

  could do that to a woman the way nothing else could, but he

  had not been prepared for her response.

  222

  "She must have loved the boy's father," Tanner ht ^

  himself say out loud and stood still as rage and agony ripped-through

  him. He knew then that he would have to be very

  careful. The last thing he wanted was another's man child

  beneath his roof, but if that's what he had to put up with to

  have Stacy, he would do it. He had seen her, and that was all it had taken to make him admit to the truth, infuriating as it was.

  He wanted Stacy. Right now nothing else mattered.

  x*^^^4 f

  Q/w^oAm

  a

  the next morning LuciNDA stood still and forced her

  hands to her sides. The sight of Drew coming down the stairs

  with his train and bear was enough to make her wring her

  hands.

  She had come home the day before from a marvelous but

  tiring day with Roddy, only to be met with Stacy's news.

  Lucinda cried herself dry before falling into an exhausted

  sleep. She woke early, before 6:00, knowing that Stacy would

  be up and readying herself to go. And now, even though it was

  just a little before 8:00, she felt utterly drained

  Stacy had shared about her faith in God, but Lucinda was

  too angry to trust. What kind of God took a person's family

  away? She had been planning to visit her brother that very

  summer, but God had taken him in the spring. Lucinda would

  never have admitted to herself that her own selfish lifestyle

  had kept her from visiting Andrew more regularly.

  Now Drew and Stacy were leaving, and after just a few days

  too, making Lucinda more bitter than ever. They needed her,

  she was certain of that. And she needed them.

  Roddy stood beside her while all of this ran through

  Luanda's mind. He shared Lucinda's grief, but he would not

  say anything that would stand in the way of Stacy's happiness.

  Lucinda was quite certain that
Tanner would not do right by

  224

  I

  his son, but Roddy believed differently. Just as he'd known that

  Tanner would once again be taken with his wife--after all,

  he'd ordered her to Winslow just moments after he arrived-- Roddy also believed that one look at his son and Tanner's

  heart would be lost.

  "Well, we're ready," Stacy said as she finally gained the

  foyer. "Thank you for everything, Roddy and Lucinda. I don't

  know when we'll be back to London, but I hope you'll come

  and see us."

  "No one can keep us away," Lucinda stated as she put her

  arms around Stacy. Each knew that her no one referred to

  Tanner.

  "Goodbye, my precious." Lucinda's voice wavered as she

  hugged Drew, and she didn't tarry long with her embrace.

  Lucinda stood at the door with her sodden handkerchief,

  but Roddy scooped Drew up in his arms and walked them

  down to the carriage. Hettie climbed aboard with a sour

  comment about her old bones, and Stacy turned to her dear

  friend

  "Will Lucinda be all right?"

  "I think so. It might take some time, and we will need to

  visit or she'll be miserable."

  "Please do, Roddy. I don't want to fight with my husband,

  but if Tanner isn't going to let me see my family, I won't stay."

  Stacy paused and then looked chagrined. "Of course, I say that

  now, but the minute he looks at me I'll shake."

  Roddy smiled at her words. "You'll do fine, and we will

  come to visit even if we have to charge the castle gate."

  "What castle?"

  Stacy looked stunned. At times it was so easy to forget that

  Drew was present and taking in every word

  Roddy kissed the little boy's cheek and handed him over

  to his mother. Stacy passed him in to Hettie and then turned

  to embrace Roddy. They didn't say another word to each other,

  but Stacy waved from the window as soon as she was inside.

  She couldn't be certain, but it looked as if Roddy's eyes were

  225

  T

  J wet. Stacy smiled into his eyes as the carriage moved away to

  tucinda's cries of goodbye and I love you.

  Stacy had completely forgotten how long the ride to Winsow

  could be. The carriage stuck in the mud on two occasions,

  and each time it took considerable maneuvering to get them

  moving again. These interludes were a delight to Drew, who

  .was rather bored with the bumpy ride and had nothing to play

  with save his train and bear.

  Stacy wouldn't have minded the ride so much, except that