Speaking of a new life
It was the first March 2006.
From three days the jail cell of Dafne resulted out. Bob had called even the agency where he worked.
«I regret Mr. Chellini, Dafne has given the resignations two days needle.»
Bob began to understand that its fears were founded, and that Dafne had taken advantage of his/her absence for some whim.
In the meantime she had returned from his/her parents; it was unbelievable as that place, that had oppressed her for years, a sure and pleasant nest you/he/she was revealed suddenly. Also to stretch the laundry with his/her/their mother, seemed the experience more appagantes that you/he/she could happen her.
«Beginning to look for something, needs tomorrow a job, and then I will return to the old place read in lease. In spring it is simpler to find him/it, because they end the courses in the universities» it told his/her mother.
«When you will decide yourself to tell me thing has happened with that your Roberto? You/he/she cannot have been ended for the evening to the morning. You have also left the job. Would I like to understand if it is the spring or there is under something?»
«Mother you had promised him. No questions. I am badly now and I want only to forget. And remembers, for that man I am dead, here doesn't have to enter! Never!»
«It is all right, it is all right, I wanted only to understand that heck has happened of so serious.»
Before getting further it turned and with affectionate tone he/she again spoke exceptionally to her.
«However you do with calm for the house; here nobody races behind you. Rather it is a miracle that you have considered us, once so much.»
That fanatical vittimismo of his/her/their mother had always sent her in beast, but this time it slipped her I set with a smile; after having known the true wickedness, you/he/she had understood that in the life some things are not then the end of the world. Rather it appreciated the notable effort of the woman to communicate, I cut her, even though to his/her way.
The day later Bob would have returned. Dafne had not decided anything yet; it spent the night without closing eye. To the seven of the morning he prepared; it jumped on board of his old compact car, directing himself/herself/itself to Linate.
Attended a hour. The longest time of his/her life. The flight of Bob was late. Dafne thought that if you/he/she had not been for the other passengers, you/he/she would have learned more gladly than the fall of that airplane.
At 10.30 o'clock around, the looks of Bob and Dafne were crossed, freezing him and making to palpitate her in a mixture of anger and fear. He/she knew that in that place there was until too people for a madman scene. You/he/she would have spoken to him in front of places of block, passengers and pilots that went on and back. That place was sure, but later what was about to tell him, its life would not be more perhaps it is. Yet it drew near him with air of challenge. He anticipated him, speaking for first.
«Thing has happened? Do you have idea of as I have worked in these days to your cause? You will have to be convincing Daf. We go to the car» it enunciated with tense air.
«No Roberto, won't go from any part. We won't make a cazzo of that that you want you anymore. It now suits you to be calm and to listen well to me: I know everything, everything how much of Vanessa. To be a dead body I have found her a crash!»
Bob looked around with anxious air, careful; you/he/she showily turned pale, you/he/she was suffering. It grew loose the tie with gestures scoordinati and confused; it began to sweat cold. You started over speaking, little surprised by that reaction.
«I won't do her/it long: you have to forget you that I exist; for you I am dead. dead indeed, in my houses. Don't approach yourself to none of my knowledge, not to try to look for me and you are away from me. If only I see your face from some part where you/he/she should not be, I will go right-hand to the police and I will say everything how much. I/you/they are also prepared to kill you with my hands. Tuneless that I wait two years to react before. Have already stolen me the most beautiful years, but is now ended! Have you understood me Bob? Ended!»
You/he/she had vomited him all I set in an instant, without fear, without it howls, but with decision. In to see him/it so impotent, the whole suffering you/he/she was carburized in warm safety, all that that had lost for years. Bob was immovable, you/he/she nervously touched him the hair and you/he/she continued to loosen the tie; you/he/she was in full crisis of anxiety, its world built on the fear and on the lies had just collapsed him I set. He/she hardly succeeded to bofonchiare some word.
«You/he/she has returned? Has you/he/she come to ruin me the life again?»
«Not to speak of her! And not to ask a cazzo! It doesn't have to interest you. Now salts around first taxi and you disappear, and he/she remembers what I have told you Bob: to the before you do, I make you beat this time in the jail!»
In to say the look it turned him/it toward two agents of the police that passed of there; the message was clearer than the same sun. Bob looked at her/it with anger and desperation, then you/he/she understood that you/he/she could not afford him/it and you/he/she lowered the draught, a possibility begging of you/he/she replies.
«I love you Daf, you know him/it. You have to give me way of explaining you everything. It is for this that I lately was going crazy; it is everything legacy to her. I have to understand Daf, and I cannot lose you. This time I would not make her/it.»
«You want to understand? You are only a crazy person if you think that I will still listen to dirty lies. End of the theater Mr. Chellini. It goes to the hell!»
Dafne disappeared among the crowd without turning himself/herself/themselves.
It was fierce of herself. You/he/she had treated him as it deserved. It climbed in car and it leaned the head on the steering wheel; unloaded the adrenaline been granted a weeping liberatorio, then Moris suddenly came to mind. It had immediately to tell him thing you/he/she had been able to do. He would have been very proud and this idea, unexpectedly excited her/it.
Reaches the cafe he/she took Moris by the hand, conducting him/it in the back. It told him everything in a sol breath, excited for how much you/he/she had succeeded in doing. Moris lifted enthusiastically her from earth in an embrace.
«But you won't have to lower the watch Daf, you know him/it. it is not quite said that will be only to make because you have asked him him. If you notice something strange you have to immediately call me, or to call the police. Vanessa is the living demonstration that that man can be dangerous, and I am not calm to know here it to Milan. The hopes indeed that you macaws not making to cazzata to leave him/it to free foot.»
In to pronounce those last words, Moris had visibly shaken, it feared for the beloved woman, and it hated the idea not to be able ventiquattr'ore to be nearby her on twenty-four. You the face softly grazed him, as to reassure him/it; they were found in a situation already lived, that Dafne this time didn't want to stimulate. It didn't love him/it and it risked to delude him/it; at the same time it didn't understand that unbelievable and premature desire to refer the love with him. Its wish was weak and he was too involved for staying himself/herself/themselves. They kissed. The takings in arm leaning her/it on a piece of furniture, beginning to feel a first excitement of it.
«Here hands not me to house.» Dafne whispered him between to kiss and the other.
But Moris got further of release returning in itself.
«No Daf, is not able» it said with frustration.
«I regret Moris, I am me the fool, excuse me.»
«You are not stupid. We desire there and it is not a guilt. However we don't have to relapse us. I don't want to expedite the times, you would repent of it and enough.»
Dafne left the cafe containing a big desire to still cry. In the following days you/he/she would have begun to realize the lack of Bob and the whole absurdity that you/he/she had overwhelmed her.
March went by and was one hard month. For the heart of Dafne you/they
had never followed so long days. Of Bob, some sign; never a call, a visit to surprise, nothing of nothing. This made her/it serene, at the same time it played her strange. Or simply, too much beautiful to be true.
A morning decided to call the mother of Bob. After a brief search it composed the number. He/she wanted to make sure him that him if you/he/she was not picked her/it up with them and it took advantage to make a thing that had not done yet of it: to thank to have sent her/it her Vanessa. Sofia didn't show signs of particular enthusiasm, it said only that the most correct thing had done.
Moris had not approved that gesture, not understanding as Dafne was able only also to think about recreating a contact, even though indirect, with that man that by now it defined" animal." Among two a dead lock was created. Moris tried to forget the strong fed feeling, he/she preferred to be her near from friend rather than to lose entirely her. The job had proposed her to the cafe and her you/he/she had accepted, enthusiastic to have a second chance. You/he/she had offered her a part-time, because of other assumptions that you/he/she had had to do in the last year. Dafne succeeded in being in a serene environment and to earn us something; for her it was the maximum one in a moment of the kind. In the attempt not to think about anything and to occupy to full the day, it had ricontattato some operating ones of a social cooperative, that you/they proposed her to collaborate to some territorial projects. The cooperatives paid few, but Dafne thought that to help the other ones would have been a beautiful experience. His/her life as that of the phoenix, few revived to the time from his/her same ashes. More and more the girl realized often to give a different sense to the things, also to the smallest. It began with some doposcuolas, in which, together with the educators, it organized some laboratories of art. To April it began to bring home meals to the people in difficulty. Idea to return to make publicity nauseated her/it; the only thought remembered her the ugliest moments of its existence.
Dafne took back pian plain possession of herself, but it was not simple; it also went to a psychologist, but as soon as the doctor began to investigate more than the due one, you/he/she put elegant to the meetings. After all, according to Dafne, nobody could enter indeed that suffering. You/he/she would have denied her, oppressed, granting her few small openings. An unbelievable strength of mind was allowing her to go on, cohabiting with the indelible memoirs of the violences, of the love that had tied her to Bob and of the bitter discovery that everything had been born on the base of absurd lies. But every now and then, inexplicably, thinking about the beautiful moments, he missed her as the air that breathed. Repressed that instants of nostalgia, buried the weakness to rediscover the anger.
In this vortex of conflicting emotions, a lot of people would quickly be lost in the labyrinths of the depression. Dafne looked around instead him and it understood that there was still so much people with which to be able to regain the serenity, among which Moris. Also in house it was not badly. You/he/she had lived with a jailer, his/her petulant parents had become entirely bearable.
To Dafne that new life seemed insipid, but it had the necessity to pad him and to grab on to those few certainties.