Page 70 of Government Men

CHAPTER 47

  THE FEATHERED SERPENT

  Fools rush in where angels fear to tread.

  - Alexander Pope

  "Xanatholen, HETh LartwenZorg?" pathed something incredibly loudly, followed by silence.

  To Bates, it felt like the top of his head had been ripped apart! He sank to his knees, as did Janet, the kids, and Wink, while poor Krog collapsed totally and seemed to be unconscious. The other humans remained standing, but were holding their hands as if they were also in pain to some extent. Milo hid whimpering in the middle of the Team, joined by a whimpering Winnebago, who shared the dog's talent for trying to avoid danger. Pru however, still stood tall, her eyes black pits, her golden mane flaring, and her horn glowing brighter and brighter! A glowing shield could be seen forming around the Team.

  “Thrixitwaldaanthj; jvrgfirty753nng8bakny8 THULGew?” pathed the something, much quieter this time; the thoughts now partly muffled by the unicorn shield. Bates and the others, except for poor Krog, stood up again, though unsteadily, due to the continuing earthquake.

  "What the hell is that?" asked Oscomb, pointing at the large jungle covered hill just ahead. The big hill was lifting up and breaking apart, as though something monstrous was rising up from underneath and within it. Hundreds of tons of trees, huge boulders, and soil were being flung up and to all sides. Bates realized with a start that the boulders were rectangular-sided blocks; obviously shaped by intelligent agencies, presumably the work of Mayans, Aztecs, or some other ancient humans of the region. Some of the blocks were landing with crushing force quite near the Team, and Bates feared for their safety, until one huge block actually hit their Pru’s protective shield dead center and bounced off of it harmlessly. The Unicorn’s protective shield was immensely strong.

  Another block that landed nearby drew the attention of the onlookers because of its unusual shape. It was not rectangular like the others. It was bigger than most, ten or twenty tons Bates supposed, and shaped like the head of a huge serpent or dragon. Bates recalled something about a feathered snake-god of the Aztecs named Quetzalcoatl.

  "The Great One comes!” said Pru.

  For just a moment, Bates thought that he was seeing a gigantic stone snake-god head rising above the hill, one that seemed to be staring right at the Team. Then, as the hail of stone blocks and trees cleared, and the scale of the head and the supporting creature below it became more apparent, the Team members were simply too shocked and terrified by the sight to even mutter exclamations.

  The human Team members felt like they were extras in a Godzilla movie. The size of the creature was simply too huge to comprehend; the terrible head itself had to be at least a dozen meters long, while the creature it belonged to was the hill itself! The exact shape of the rest of the creature wasn't readily apparent, though there was an impression of coiled loops of tail, folded wings, and four titanic limbs centered by an immense body. Immense spikes jutted up from the top of its head and its neck, back, and tail, which ended in a great triangle-shaped tip. The whole thing was generally various shades of green, with the exception of the head, which was multicolored and ringed at the neck by what appeared to be huge multicolored feathers. The eyes were each a meter or more across and blood red, and from the mouth gigantic white fangs protruded.

  The thing suddenly lifted its head towards the heavens, opened its cavernous mouth, and roared. The resulting deafening sound was much like the deep roar of a tornado despite the shield around the Team, and it caused a sharp Earth-shock that threw everyone but Pru to the ground again. Though the Team hadn't understood its language, there was no mistaking the tone of its voice, the violence of its emergence, or the outrage of that roar. The Great One was REALLY pissed off!

  Bates was terrified. Snakes had always bothered him, and this snake-looking thing was worse than his worst nightmares.

  Without taking a single step, the head, supported by a neck at least a hundred meters long, moved towards the Team, and in seconds was hovering above and before them. It was much bigger than Bates had at first thought.

  "LEN, HSRIC, BIEUCCXWTHL; JNYUB HETH LARIUN," it said, and the thoughts and sound were defining, even within Pru's protective shield. The Team felt exposed and vulnerable.

  Then the unicorn’s shield simply disappeared!

  Bates, who had gotten up to stand next to Pru, looked at the unicorn, who simply shrugged and shook her head. The disappearance of the shield was clearly not her idea. The great head of the serpent-dragon hung above the Team, apparently waiting.

  Bates, as Team leader, felt that it was up to him to try to speak to the immense creature. "Greetings great Quetzalcoatl!” he pathed. "We come as friends, to warn you of a great danger that would destroy you! Our common enemy the Ra want to kill you.”

  In response, the great beast opened its mouth wide enough to expose rows of teeth larger than men, while a red forked tongue as thick as a giant tree trunk ran across them!

  That was more than enough for terrified Winnebago, who suddenly bolted from among the Team and went running for all he was worth away from the scene, along the jungle path by which the group had arrived. Quick as thought, impossible lengths of dragon's tongue darted out to twist around the running Indian's waist and haul him away kicking and screaming to be held suspended a few meters in front of the dragon's head!

  "Fudge!” shouted Bates, as he mentally made ready to strike a blow at the dragon, but he was reproved by Pru.

  "Wait, human," the unicorn pathed. "Violence against the Great One is impossible! His tone is threatening but I understand his words, and right now he seeks merely to communicate with you humans directly.”

  So the Team watched helplessly for long minutes as a now silent Winnebago hung suspended before the giant reptilian face, high above their heads. Their friend seemed to be unconscious, or was he already dead? What was the dragon doing to him? Was he to be eaten? There was simply no way to know.

  Suddenly the tongue released him, with seeming distaste, and utter disregard, as the now fully conscious Winnebago was left to fall screaming onto the Team, where he was fortunate to be safely fielded in Oscomb's big arms.

  "SHIT!” roared the dragon, with Winnebago's voice, only incredibly loud. "SO YOU DAMN WELL BETTER EXPLAIN IT TO ME YOU GUYS, AND MAKE IT GOOD, NOW THAT I UNDERSTAND THIS PRIMITIVE APE LANGUAGE YOU CALL AMERICAN! WHY THE HELL DID YOU WAKE ME UP? THAT ONE’S PUNY MIND IS STUFFED WITH CRAP ABOUT INSURANCE AND CONTRACTS, AND OTHER CRAP THAT I DON'T UNDERSTAND AND DON’T WANT TO UNDERSTAND!

  "WHAT THE HELL IS A BAGEL WITH CREAM CHEESE THAT HE KEEPS THINKING ABOUT? THIS PLANET IS STILL OVER-RUN WITH YOU STINKING LITTLE APES, BUT YOU BOTHERED TO WAKE ME UP AGAIN ANYWAY? DIDN’T I TELL YOU NOT TO DO THAT? DIDN’T I HAVE YOU BUILD ROCK THINGS OVER ME TO KEEP ME HIDDEN? THIS BETTER BE GOOD!

  "STILL, YOU'RE NOT ALL APES THIS TIME ARE YOU? I AIN'T ATE ME A UNICORN IN A LONG DAMN TIME! I BEGAN TO THINK THEY MIGHT BE ALL USED UP!”

  "Great One, we are sorry to disturb your rest," shouted Bates. "But the disturbance was a battle between us and our common enemy, the Ra. The Ra are trying to kill you, and us."

  "YEAH!” replied the dragon. "YOU SAID SOMETHING LIKE THAT ABOUT A MINUTE AGO, NOW THAT I UNDERSTAND IT. BUT AS YOU MAY HAVE ALREADY FIGURED OUT, I AIN’'T TOO DAMN SUSCEPTIBLE TO BEING WASTED. SO WHAT'S THIS 'GREAT DANGER' YOU WANT TO WARN ME ABOUT? AND WHAT THE FRIG IS A RA ANYWAY?"

  Apparently the knowledge that the dragon had obtained from Winnebago had a lot of gaps, many of them probably reflecting gaps in Winnebago’s knowledge and interests. So Bates explained, as he had done by now several times before, about Dannos and the Ra, though this time he omitted many of the details of what had happened over the last couple of weeks. After all, why would a dragon want to know about a high speed chase on the Washington beltway, or buying Twinkies in WAWAs?

  Besides, the more detail he tried to tell the Dragon, the more he had to painstakingly backtrack and explain. Although the creature had Winnebago's voice, vocabulary, and a fe
w memories, the depth of its understanding was poor, and it had an irritating intolerance of the idiosyncrasies of the 'American' language!

  "NOW WAIT JUST A SECOND BATES, YOU SAID EARLIER THAT A BUS IS A GROUND TRAVELING MACHINE THAT DOESN'T FLY, BUT AIRPLANES ARE MACHINES THAT FLY. BUT THEN YOU SAY THAT YOU HAVE A BUS THAT FLIES, BUT IT'S NOT AN AIRPLANE! SO WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TRYING TO TELL ME?” A fifty meter long plume of blue-green flame shot out of the dragon's nostrils, searing the air just above the Team.

  A trembling Bates tried to calm the Dragon and explain as best he could. "Right! Sorry to confuse you! My fault entirely! Our special Bus is really more of a space ship, but we call it a bus because it's shaped like a bus, and it looks like a bus, and carries a lot of people like a bus."

  "BUT WHEN YOU PUT IT THAT WAY, IT REMINDS ME OF SOMETHING FROM THE MEMORY OF WINNEBAGO ABOUT LOOKING AND QUACKING LIKE A DUCK. HOW CAN THAT BE LOGICAL AND RELEVANT? DUCKS ALSO FLY, CORRECT? WHAT IS A DUCK, AND IS THE BUS A DUCK?"

  "No, I don't think so!” replied Bates, trying to explain, but at the same time diplomatically trying to not be too critical of the dragon’s logic.

  "WELL THEN, WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN SPACE SHIPS AND AIRPLANES? IS IT THAT FOR AIRPLANES THERE'S LIFE INSURANCE THAT YOU BUY IN AIRPORTS? AND ARE YOU SURE THAT DUCKS HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH IT? I SENSE A DUCK THAT SELLS INSURANCE."

  And so it took several long hours for Bates to explain the basics of the situation to 'Quetzal', as the dragon agreed to be called. Fortunately, though the dragon had the disadvantage of Winnebago's confused and largely irrelevant memories, he was evidently highly intelligent. Finally, after Bates was finished, the dragon chose to verify the Dannos part of the story by an amazing feat of mental powers. In the sky above and to the East, a great opening appeared in the clouds; then a thin white cloud appeared below it. Finally on the thin white cloud, the image of an irregular, dark, tumbling object appeared. It looked like a huge image of Dannos, projected onto a screen-shaped cloud!

  "Is that really Dannos or only how you imagine Dannos to be?" asked a curious Mel Guthery.

  "THAT'S THE REAL DANNOS, RIGHT WHERE YOU APES SAID. A LITTLE TOUGH FORMING AN OPTICAL VIEWING APPARATUS OUT OF COMPRESSED ATMOSPHERE THAT STRETCHES TO THE FAR SIDE OF THE PLANET THOUGH!” replied Quetzal. Even as Great Quetzal spoke, the image faded away.

  "OK, I'VE GOT TO ADMIT, THE DAMN THING PROBABLY WOULD HAVE KILLED ME. AND IT REALLY MAKES ME WONDER ABOUT THAT LAST ONE THAT DAMN NEAR GOT ME BUT WIPED OUT NEARLY ALL OF MY NIFTY DINOSAURS EXCEPT THE LITTLE FEATHER COVERED ONES. MAYBE THAT NEAR-MISS WASN'T AN ACCIDENT EITHER! BUT YOU SAVED MY BACON THIS TIME, WHATEVER BACON IS, SO THAT'S ONE I OWE YOU.

  “SO OK THEN, IT'S SETTLED! AS YOUR REWARD I PROMISE THAT I WON'T EAT ANY OF YOU, EVEN THOUGH YOU WOKE ME UP. THAT SEEMS FAIR ENOUGH. CONGRATULATIONS! I PROMISE TO EVEN PASS ON EATING THE UNICORN!” The great head withdrew up towards the body, from which a pair of impossibly large feathered wings unfolded, and started to flap! ”GOOD-BYE FOREVER, LITTLE APE CREATURES!” The dragon was apparently making ready to leave!

  "Where are you going?" shouted Bates in alarm!

  "I'M GETTING THE HELL AWAY FROM HERE, THAT'S FOR DAMN SURE! ASTEROID COMING! PLUS, I'M HUNGRY. GONNA EAT ME SOME FAT WHALES BEFORE THEY'RE ALL COOKED AWAY WHEN THAT ASTEROID STRIKES!”

  "Wait cousin!” pathed Pru loudly! ”There IS more to discuss!”

  "SO!” replied Quetzal, "YOU UNICORNS DO STILL CLAIM TO REMEMBER OUR KINSHIP!” The big dragon folded its wings and settled Earthward again to regard the unicorn. The tone of its voice was definitely not friendly, and fire snorted from its nostrils and mouth!

  "It is you that through your very acts have denied kinship!” claimed Pru. "But as you know, even for the sake of that kinship I do not claim special privileges of safety thereby, since you long ago pledged yourself to consume and ruin me! Well I knew long before this quest with the humans began, that through the act of seeking you, my freedom or very existence could be forfeit, as it has been in ages past for all my brothers and sisters that have sought you out. I do not seek to renew the feud between us, Great One. But now as we have indeed saved your life and you have granted my freedom, perhaps this is the opportunity that I have long sought to redress our old wounds."

  The Earth shook! ”REDRESS WOUNDS? ME? YOU'VE GOT IT BACKWARDS! REDRESS YOURSELF FIRST! PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER, THOSE