“So … why don’t you use it?” Daniel asked.
Gemma shook her head and looked away from him. “It’s complicated. ”
“I’m sure it is, and I don’t mean to rag on you, but Lexi almost killed us,” he said without any accusation. “She was actually really close to killing me, but if you had been that monster, you would’ve done a hell of a lot better in a fight. ”
“I know, and I am so sorry that you were in that situation,” she said, rushing to apologize again.
“Gemma, I’m not trying to make you feel bad. ” He stepped closer to her. “I’m just saying that you need to do everything you can to protect yourself and the people you care about. If Harper had been up there instead of me, Penn wouldn’t have killed Lexi to protect her like she did with me. Harper would be dead now. ”
Gemma’d already thought of that, and she swallowed hard. “I know. But you don’t know what it was like. When I was the monster, I wasn’t in control of myself at all. It took me over and I couldn’t think straight and…”
“I know that you hurt someone,” he said softly. “But Lexi seemed in control of herself when she was the monster. And if Lexi could do it, and she was a reckless idiot, you can do it. ”
“I know that I need to practice, but I’m just afraid of what could happen when I lose control. ”
“You’re stronger than this, Gemma,” Daniel said in a confident way that made her look up at him. “You can get ahold of this, you can be in control of your powers. You just have to try. ”
“Like … right now?” Gemma asked.
“Why not? We’re alone in an empty theater. ” He gestured widely at the stage. “If you rampage, you’ll break a few seats and tear some curtains. Nothing I can’t fix. ”
“What if I hurt you?” Gemma asked.
“You won’t. ”
“How can you be so sure?”
“I just am. ”
She shook her head. “I don’t even know how to. ”
“How did you make the wings happen before?”
“I was scared as hell. ” Gemma remembered the attack at the sirens’ house with perfect clarity. “I thought Lexi was going to kill you, and it just happened. My fingers and teeth have changed before, too, but it’s only when I feel threatened, or I’m really, really hungry. ”
“Okay. So recapture that emotion. I can threaten you if you want,” Daniel offered.
“No,” she said quickly. “That doesn’t seem safe. ”
“How about this? Think of Penn or that horrible new siren Liv,” he suggested. “And they’re going after Harper or Alex. Hell, they’re going after both of them. Really picture them hurting the people you care about most. ”
Gemma closed her eyes and tried to will herself to feel the terror she’d felt before. In her mind, she pictured Liv’s wicked smile and Penn’s shifting into the bird-monster. And then she imagined them going after Alex and Harper, which wasn’t hard to do since she’d already imagined it a hundred times before.
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Normally, she’d try to ease her panic and get the images out of her mind. She’d do something proactive, like researching the scroll or going swimming to clear her mind, but now she let it linger. She made herself feel the absolute terror and rage at the thought of losing the people she loved the most.
And then she began to feel it. The flutter across her skin, radiating all over her body. It was a subtle, pleasurable feeling. It seemed focused in her hands, as an odd, stretching sensation passed over them.
When she opened her eyes, she could visibly see it happening. Her fingers were elongating, the skin stretching unnaturally. Her nails even began to grow, changing color from white to a dark brown as they thickened and began to hook like talons.
“Oh my gosh. My fingers…” Gemma gasped, watching her hands transform.
She’d been afraid that if she stopped focusing her energy on transforming, that it would stop, but now, since she was terrified about losing control, the fear seemed to push it on. Her fingers continued to grow until they were nearly a foot long. The skin stretched tight on her hands and arms, making the bones stand out more sharply.
“Does it hurt?” Daniel asked, peering at her hands.
“No, it tingles … and it feels kinda good, actually,” she admitted.
The flutter continued over her skin and all throughout her. Heat surged through her arm muscles, but even that felt oddly good. Her heart seemed to beat differently, and it felt as if it were expanding her chest, pounding more forcefully and pumping blood more rapidly through her veins.
When her wings had torn through her back during her final encounter with Lexi, that had been incredibly painful. She’d felt the skin ripping. But this was much different.
“That is so weird,” Daniel said, sounding in awe of her transformation as her arms began to stretch and grow.
“My mouth itches,” Gemma said, and the words came out with a lisp when her tongue hit against the sharp points of her new teeth.
The roof of her mouth was burning hot, and she could taste blood, but she wasn’t sure if it was from her gums as new teeth tore through or from her tongue’s hitting against them.
“Ugh. ” Gemma groaned. “It’s hard to talk with these teeth. ”
Daniel stared at her with wide eyes. “Okay, that is really gross. ”
“You’re not helping,” Gemma said dryly.
Thankfully, she couldn’t see herself, but she knew exactly how Lexi and Penn looked when they changed. They had a mouthful of hundreds of razor-sharp teeth poking jaggedly out of their mouths, so their lips were stretched around them in a thin, red line.
Gemma could feel the tightness of her lips, and her vision changed, becoming clearer as her eyes changed into the yellow, birdlike eyes of the monster. She could even hear the bones in her face cracking as they shifted and moved to accommodate a much larger mouth.
“I’m sorry, but…” Daniel shook his head. “That’s just … not pretty at all. ”
When the bones stopped cracking, she realized she could hear much clearer than she had before. The sound of Daniel’s breath and even the sound of his heartbeat echoed in her ears.
And the transformation seemed to make her hungrier. Not ravenous like she’d been before, when she’d killed a man, but it was gnawing inside her, spreading out from her stomach with insistent electricity.
“Should I do more?” Gemma asked, and her voice had taken on that slightly demonic tone she heard when Lexi and Penn spoke in this form.
“Can you do more?” Daniel asked.
Her legs hadn’t shifted at all, and her wings hadn’t broken out yet, so she knew she could go further. But she wasn’t sure that she should. “I don’t know. ”
“How does it feel? Are you still in control?” Daniel asked.
“Yeah. I mean, I’m not eating you, but I do feel hungrier. ” She breathed in deeply, trying to calm the hunger growing inside her, but it only made things worse. “And you smell…”
“I smell?” Daniel asked, confused.
“Yeah, like…” Gemma didn’t know how to explain it. Nothing on earth had ever smelled the way he did just then. “Delicious. ”
“Seriously?” His eyes widened. “You want to eat me right now?”
“Kinda, yeah. I can hear your heart beat, and it’s like…” Gemma closed her eyes and sang along with the melody of his heart. “Da da dum, da da dum. ”
“Holy shit,” Daniel said in complete awe. “Your voice was really beautiful just then. ”
“Really?” Gemma asked, and looked at him.
He didn’t have that glassy stare in his eyes the way humans did when they were under the siren spell, but there was something not quite right about his gaze, like he was captivated by her.
“Yeah. ” He shook his head, trying to clear it. “I’m not under your spell, at least not the way I think normal guys would be, but yeah, you had me kinda entra
nced just then. ”
“You have no idea how hungry I am. I think I need to eat soon. ” She tried to lick her lips but could only run her tongue along her teeth. Her stomach growled, an audible, angry sound, and her body trembled with hunger. “Well … maybe I could eat now. You could get someone, right? Some horrible person?”
“Some horrible person? Where would I find some horrible person?” Daniel asked, and he’d taken a step back from her.
Her back and ribs began cracking as her torso stretched out, and she felt herself losing her sense of reason. Her thoughts were getting blocked out, and she could barely remember the name of the guy standing in front of her. She didn’t know where she was, and she didn’t care. The only thing that mattered was the burning hunger inside her.
“I don’t know. But you should totally find them right now. ”
“Gemma … you’re changing more. ” He stepped back again and stared up at her, now that she was towering over him. “I think you need to get yourself under control really fast. ”
“I will,” she hissed. “I just need to eat. ”
“Your voice just now, it was not pretty at all. You’re losing yourself, Gemma,” Daniel said forcefully. “Let’s bring it back. ”
There was a blackness coming over her thoughts, and she knew she was losing control. She knew that the monster was taking over, and soon she’d be run by some kind of primal instinct that she didn’t trust or understand.
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“Gemma,” Daniel said, keeping his voice calm but firm. “Gemma, you need to get under control. ”
“Daniel,” she said, mostly because she just wanted to say his name. She wanted to make him a real person who she knew and cared about and not a meal she’d have for supper.
The sound of the door opening at the front of the theater echoed, and she cocked her head, listening for the sound of a new heartbeat. Maybe this would be someone she could eat.
“Shit. Gemma. Somebody’s coming. ” He held his hands up to her and tried to push her back behind the curtain but without really touching her. “Get back. ”
“Daniel…” She moaned but moved back, hiding behind the velvet curtain.
“Hello, Daniel,” the director, Tom, said in his lilting British accent. “I thought you’d be gone by now. ”
The thought of devouring Tom or Daniel, or maybe both, was consuming her. The way their blood would taste warm and sweet down her throat. It took all her strength to keep herself hidden behind the curtain.
Tom sounded especially delectable. Her emotional attachment to Daniel helped keep some of her hunger at bay, but she didn’t feel anywhere near as strong about Tom. He might not even be a nice guy. She’d seen him yell at Kirby before.
When she’d killed Jason, it had been in a blackout, and she thought she’d forgotten everything about it. But now, a lingering memory surfaced—the way his heart had tasted, and how warm and sweet his blood felt going down her throat.
And then she didn’t even need to justify killing Tom. Reason was leaving her entirely, and all she wanted to do was eat.
“No, yeah, the set’s just about down,” Daniel said in a nervous rush. “What are you doing here? Do you need help? What’s going on?”
“I just left something in the office,” Tom said. “I’ll be gone in a jiffy. ”
Instead of rushing out to rip him open, Gemma clung to the last scrap of reason still remaining and put her long arms over her head. She crouched, trying to make herself as small as possible, and wished she could disappear into the floor. The hunger and monster were still fighting to dominate her.
She heard his footsteps retreating, then she realized she couldn’t hear anything anymore. Not his heartbeat or even Daniel’s. The flutter of her skin had stopped, and for a horrible moment, she thought she’d given in to the monster and blacked out like she did the last time. She fully expected to open her eyes and find herself covered in blood.
But then she realized the hunger was still there. Not as strong as it had been a moment ago, but much stronger than it had been before she’d started shifting into the monster.
“Gemma?” Daniel asked. “Are you okay?”
She lifted her head to see him standing over her. She glanced down, and her hands were back to normal. When she ran her tongue along her teeth, they felt flat and ordinary.
Her tank top had ripped when her torso had stretched out, so her purple bra was showing, and Gemma quickly crossed her arms over her chest and stood up.
“Yeah, I’m back to normal,” she said, hoping her voice sounded even and not as tremulous as it felt. “I ripped my shirt. ”
“Here. ” Daniel took off his flannel shirt, revealing a T-shirt, and Gemma pulled it on, covering herself up.
“So that wasn’t such a good idea,” Gemma said.
“No, you did good,” he said, but he didn’t sound that convincing. “I mean, the first time you transformed, you completely lost control. This time, you almost did, but you stayed true to yourself. Nobody got hurt. You just need to practice more. ”
“Maybe I should stick with safer things, like learning to control my wings for now,” Gemma said.
“Maybe,” he agreed with some reluctance. “But I think if you want to beat this curse, and you want to keep the people you care about safe, you’ll have to harness who you are. You’ll have to learn to fight. ”
“I know. ” She sighed. “And thanks for being so cool about everything. ”
“Did I seem cool? Good. Because you’re a really hideous monster, like so gross. ”
She smirked. “Thanks, Daniel. ”
“Anytime. ”
Daniel went back to work taking down the set, and she continued to help him, but she didn’t let on how unnerved she really was. The hunger was even stronger now than it had been before, and Gemma realized dismally that her body would insist on eating even sooner.
With September rapidly approaching, Gemma had only a couple more weeks until her cravings were completely out of control. And that was assuming, of course, that Penn didn’t kill her first.
SIXTEEN
Slumber
Daniel hadn’t commented on her overstuffed book bag, not when she got on the boat or when she carried it into his house on the island. But then again, he probably thought it was homework.
That was the kind of hot date Harper was, and yet Daniel tolerated it with such ease and patience that she was often overwhelmed by how grateful she was to have a guy like him in her life.
“So…” She slipped her heavy book bag off her shoulders and dropped it on the kitchen table with a thud. “Mind if I spend the night tonight?”
“I…” Daniel glanced down at the bag, then at her, and seemed to be at a loss for words. “I thought you were going back to Sundham tonight. ”
“That’s what I told Gemma and my dad because I didn’t want to explain anything to them,” Harper said. “But I don’t have class until ten tomorrow morning, and I haven’t been able to spend much time with you lately. So I thought maybe I could spend the night, unless—”
“No. I mean, no unless. Yeah, you can spend the night here. You can always spend the night here. You’re always welcome. Mi casa, su casa. ” He laughed.
“It would just be sleeping,” Harper said. “You know … Not any … you know. I haven’t changed my position on anything. I still want to wait until…”
“Yeah, no, that’s cool, I get it,” he said. “Anything you want. ”
She covered her face in her hands and groaned. “Ugh. I’m being totally weird and awkward, and I don’t know why. You know that I care about you, and I don’t want to send you mixed signals, but I’m not ready, and I should probably just go. ”
“No, Harper. ” Daniel walked over to her and took her hands in his, gently pulling them away from her face. “I care about you, and I hope there will come a time when we have sex. And I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t though
t about it, about how much the both of us would enjoy it. ” He raised her hand to his lips, brushing a gentle kiss across her knuckles.
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“But I don’t want to do anything you don’t want to do,” he went on. “I know that you’re not ready, and that’s fine. I’m in no rush. So if you want to spend the night tonight, we can spend all night with our clothes on, spooning, and I’ll be more than happy with it. Okay?”
“Are you sure you’re okay with it?” Harper asked. “I mean, it wouldn’t change anything if you weren’t. I want to know if you’re not okay. ”
“I am one hundred percent sure I’m okay with it. ” Daniel smiled. “I waited months before I even got a kiss from you, and you know what I learned from that? You’re definitely worth the wait. ”
Harper leaned against his chest and stared up into his eyes, and he wrapped his arms around her. She didn’t know whether it was the feel of his strong arms around her or the thought of sharing the most intimate part of herself with Daniel when she was ready, but heat swept through her.
“You can’t keep saying perfect things like that to me,” she told him.
“Why not?” Daniel asked.
“Because I can’t come up with anything perfect to say back to you. ”
“Okay. How about this? How about I say, I love you, then you say, I love you?” Daniel asked with a playful smile. “That sounds pretty perfect to me. ”
“I love you,” Harper said.
“I love you, too. ” He leaned down and kissed her gently on the mouth. “But I was supposed to say it first. ”
“I beat you. ” Harper laughed and pulled away from him. She didn’t want to let him go, but the emotions swirling through her left her feeling overloaded, and she needed a moment to collect herself.
“So do you have any homework to do tonight?” Daniel asked, following her as she walked over to the couch. “Or do I have you all to myself?”
“I could do some studying,” Harper said as she leaned back on the couch. Daniel sat down next to her, and she laid her legs across his lap. “But I think I’ll skip it for tonight. ”
“You sure? I don’t want to be the reason for bad grades. ”
“No, I need to take a break every once in a while, or my brain will overload. ”
“And nobody wants that. ” He grinned. “Did you go swimming with Gemma today?”
“I did. ” Harper nodded. “She took me out in the ocean, past the island. It freaks me out a little when she does that. She’s so crazy fast. ”
When Gemma turned into a mermaid, she sliced through the water like nothing else. She’d been a fast swimmer as a human, but now she was like lightning. The waves couldn’t keep up with her.
Harper would cling to Gemma, her arms wrapped tightly around her as her sister pulled her through the ocean. She stayed at the surface, so Harper could breathe, and she’d feel the sun beating down on her skin as the waves splashed over her. Even Harper had to admit, there was something truly exhilarating about it.
“Did you have fun?” Daniel asked.
“I did. ” Her wistful smile faded to something darker when she thought about the sirens. “What do you think of Thea?”