**
That Friday was the first one in a long time that I didn’t have football. It had been a long season. The varsity team marched right through the playoffs and won State easily. There was an incredible ticker-tape parade in downtown Winsor. During the parade I sat with Chad in the car right behind the coaches, second in line. The team voted on who should sit with Chad, the MVP of the playoffs and the championship game. They picked me, not Oliver. I felt guilty sitting in the lead car with Chad, but Cora reassured me that I had helped the team win State. I was an inspiration, she said, even if I had faked an injury. But I still thought Oliver should have been up there in the spotlight, not me. He was the golden boy, the chosen one—and I stole that from him.
The December temperature had quickly dropped into the low 20s, which was colder than usual for this time of year. We had already seen an inch of snow, but that was okay by me because I loved snow.
I got home from school on Friday excited to go to Elle’s house for the first time, but really nervous to meet her parents. I didn’t know what to expect.
“Nicholas, the phone is for you!”
I had fallen asleep waiting to get ready to leave, so I didn’t hear the phone ring. I sprang out of my bed and grabbed the phone, still half asleep. “Hello?”
“Hey, Nicholas. Instead of coming over at 7:00, could you be here at 6:30? My dad would like to meet you before he leaves for his meeting.”
“I can do that. Do you need me to bring anything for dinner?” I asked.
“No, just bring yourself.”
“Okay, see you soon.” Her angelic voice was soothing, but then I realized what she had just said. My dad would like to meet you. I was supposed to meet both of her parents together. So if he was unable to be there, why did I have to come over earlier? Did her dad have to meet all of her friends? It seemed so strange.
“So what time do you have to go over tonight?” Cora asked, standing in my door.
“I have to be there at 6:30 now.” I rubbed my eyes trying to wake up.
“You better get a move on; it’s 5:30,” she said, walking out of my room.
“Cora,” I called to her, “do you think it’s odd that her dad wants to meet me?”
Cora walked back into my room and said, “No, that’s normal,” and walked back out.
I was still groggy from the nap. I had totally forgotten about the fight I had with Cora earlier about going over to meet Elle’s parents. She didn’t want me to get too close to her and her family because it would already be hard enough to move away at the end of the year. She didn’t want me to experience a “broken heart” as she put it. Also she was concerned about the questions they would ask. Cora didn’t like for me to be questioned without her, and I didn’t care for it either. But as much as I hated the questions, if I chose not to go, the pain of not seeing Elle would be far worse.
I glanced at the clock; it was 5:40. My heart started to race. I didn’t want to be late. The shower had not warmed up yet, and I was already halfway done. I quickly shaved, only cutting myself once. I got out still soaking wet. I ran down the hall to my room, drying off on the way. I put on my favorite pair of jeans and a nice red button-up that Cora had bought for me last Christmas. I fixed my hair and glanced at the clock. 5:55. I slipped my shoes on and hurried down the stairs.
“You’re looking sharp, Nicholas.”
“Thanks, Cora. What’s that?”
She was holding a small potted plant with a ribbon around it. The brown pot had three green sticks coming out of it, each supporting a vine that had several deep pink flowers on it. For such a frail looking thing, the flowers were radiant, full of life.
“It’s a Phalaenopsis Hybrid Orchid.”
“No, not what is it. What’s it for?”
“It’s a gift that you are going to give to Elle’s mom for her house.”
“Why? Elle told me not to bring anything.”
“If you want to make a good impression, then you need to bring a gift.”
“I am just going over there for dinner, probably pizza or something.”
“I doubt that very much,” Cora said. “Here, take it and make sure you say ‘Thank you,’ and ‘Yes, sir. No, ma’am.’”
“I always do.”
She pushed the plant into my hands, walked me to the front door, and opened it.
“Can I at least have a jacket?” I asked.
The lightly powdered snow on the ground was whipping up in the wind, making it feel much colder than the actual temperature. She took the plant out of my hands and grabbed my winter jacket from the closet. I put it on and she gave me back the potted plant. “Go, already. You don’t want to be late. The truck has the keys in it.”
This was the first time I was able to drive after getting my license. My birthday, November 23, had come and gone with little excitement. Just how I liked it—no fuss. I kept my birthday a secret from Elle. As much as I was now getting used to everyone knowing me, I still didn’t like the attention. So the only thing that I did was go get my license.
Driving to the house took no time at all. Even with the snow, I arrived five minutes early. I got out of the truck with the small pink flowers swaying back and forth in the snowy wind.
Elle’s house was not like any of the other kids’ houses that I had seen. Hers was more modest and a lot older, but kept up very nicely. I walked up to the door, which was adorned by a large bell-covered wreath. I rang the doorbell. Elle opened the door before the ringing had stopped. She looked more beautiful than usual. Her hair was pulled back, exposing her neck. Her cheeks were full of color and her lips shined. She had on a white blouse with lace around the neck. I had an overwhelming urge to lean in and press my lips to her neck and feel her warm skin. When she opened the door farther, it allowed her perfume to surround me, making me dizzy. I stood frozen to the front step.
“Hi, Nicholas.”
It took a second for me to answer. “Hi, Elle. You look stunning this evening.”
She blushed and smiled, opening the door and motioning for me to enter.
“Well, this must be Nicholas.”
“Good evening, Mrs. Canan.” Mrs. Canan was standing at the top of a short flight of steps that led up to their family room. She was also pretty. I could see where Elle got her blue eyes and beautiful hair.
“Please, Nicholas, come on in and take off your jacket.”
“This is for you.” I handed the plant to Mrs. Canan.
Her eyes met mine, and she said in the most sincere way, “Thank you so much for the flower, Nicholas. That was very thoughtful. I know the exact spot for it.”
Then she said, “Please, sit down.”
“Thank you very much. You have a beautiful home.”
Elle took my jacket and hung it on a coat rack that looked like a Christmas tree. Their house had dark wood floors. The walls were painted a rich brown color and covered by art and pictures. All of the furniture was dark wood with a lot of colorful accents. The couch was leather. I could tell that Mrs. Canan took great pride in her home. Everything was perfect. The entire house had been decorated for Christmas. From the large Christmas tree with a train around the bottom to the Santa Claus doorknob covers, it was one of the most festive houses I had ever seen. Cora was more into the modern Christmas decorations. This house felt so warm and cozy.
“Would you like something to drink, Nicholas?” Elle asked, but her angelic voice was not as calm as it usually was; she sounded nervous.
“No, I am fine, thank you.”
“No really, please have some warm spiced apple cider. We made it fresh today.”
I looked at Elle and she gave me that adorable smile. “Well then, I would love to have a glass, Elle. Thank you.”
“So, Nicholas, Elle tells me that you just moved here this year. Where did you move from?”
“I moved here from a small town in upper Ohio. My mom got transferred because of her job.”
“What does she do?”
“Mom, don’t ask him twenty questions,” Elle said, walking back into the room with three mugs on a Christmas tree platter.
“I was just trying to get to know him, dear.”
“Here is your apple cider.” Elle handed me a glass, and then gave one to her mom. She sat down next to where I was standing. I had been waiting for Elle to sit down before I did. My father always waited for my mom to sit, and he also used to open every door for her.
Mrs. Canan sounded as if she was choking on her drink. I turned and looked at her, and she was smiling at Elle. Elle was giving her an evil look. I was missing something.
“Nicholas, are you hungry?” asked Mrs. Canan.
“Yes, ma’am,” I told her.
“Well, let’s eat then.”
I followed them into the small but elegant dining room, which was also decorated for Christmas.
“Nicholas, you can sit here next to Elle.”
I pulled out Elle’s chair and she sat down. I waited for Mrs. Canan to be seated and then I sat. Again the two of them were talking with their eyes. I felt like asking them if they wanted me to leave so they could talk. The table was definitely not set up for pizza. It was set with fancy place settings.
“Mr. Canan will be down in a minute. We should start dinner without him. He will eat at his meeting,” said Mrs. Canan.
The table was set for four people, so his meeting must have been a last minute change. We passed around the roasted chicken and three different vegetables, which were all prepared differently. They bowed their heads and I did too. Then Mrs. Canan said a very short prayer. Mrs. Canan and Elle began to eat and so did I. The food was incredible. I usually didn’t like other people’s food because I was used to the gourmet dishes Cora made, but Mrs. Canan’s food was what I considered a good home-cooked meal.
“Mrs. Canan, this food is incredible.”
“Well, I’m glad you like it, but you should tell that to the cook,” she said, glancing at Elle.
“Elle, the food is delicious.”
“Elle is our personal chef. If I was going to cook, we’d be having pizza tonight.” We all laughed. It was funnier to me because that’s what I thought we would be eating.
“Honey, is he here yet?” Mr. Canan said in a booming voice, walking down the stairs.
“Yes, dear. We are in the dining room.”
Mr. Canan walked around the corner. I stood up. Mr. Canan stood about a foot away from me. I felt like he was surveying me, making sure he could identify me in a police lineup if he had to.
“Well, this must be Mr. Keller, who I’ve heard so much about and watched on the football field.” He extended his hand and I grasped it.
“Nice to meet you, Mr. Canan.”
“Please, sit down, Nicholas. Don’t feel like you have to stop eating on my account.” This seemed like a test, so I continued to stand.
“Sit down, Nicholas,” Elle said to me.
I sat down slowly, and Mr. Canan sat across from me at the table. It was like we were about to arm wrestle or play a game of chess. I slowly began to eat my food, feeling Mr. Canan staring at me.
“So, Nick, is it okay if I call you Nick?”
“Yes, sir,” I said immediately.
“What are your intentions toward my little girl?”
I was not expecting that question, and with a mouth full of food, I nearly spit it out all over the table.
“Dad, what are you doing? I told you that we are just friends,” Elle said.
“Well, I wanted to hear what he thought about you for myself,” Mr. Canan said to Elle, while looking at me.
I cleared my throat. “Well, sir, your daughter was one of the few people who befriended me when I first moved here. I feel blessed to have such a wonderful friend in my life.”
Mr. Canan stood quickly. “Okay. Well, it was nice to meet you, Nick.” He walked over and kissed the top of Mrs. Canan’s head. “See you, honey,” he said and then winked at Elle. He smiled, grabbed his jacket, and disappeared down the flight of steps.
The rest of dinner was not as eventful as the beginning. Mrs. Canan continued to ask me question after question about Cora and me. She also apologized several times for how abruptly Mr. Canan left. I think Elle was trying to eat fast so that she could take me away from her mom’s questions. When dinner was finished I helped clean the table and thanked Mrs. Canan for having me over.
“Mom, we are going downstairs to watch some TV.”
“Okay, dear. Nicholas, if I don’t see you again tonight, it was a pleasure to meet you.”
Elle dragged me downstairs away from her mom. Right when we got to the bottom of the stairs, she turned to me.
“I’m sorry, Nicholas. That was so embarrassing.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, my mother asking you all of those questions.”
“Don’t worry about it; the questions weren’t that bad.”
“Also, sorry about my dad.”
“I have to admit that was uncomfortable.”
“I told him that we are just friends over and over.”
“It’s okay. When I’m a dad, I think I’ll be the same way.”
She smiled and took my hand. “Thank you for all those nice things you said about me.” Her smile paralyzed me. I couldn’t say anything. She turned the lights on, illuminating the basement.
“So what do you want to do?” she asked.
“Not sure,” I sputtered.
“Well, do you want to watch a movie?”
“That sounds fine. Whatever you want to do. But can I ask you a question? What were you and your mom talking about?”
She looked at me with a confused expression.
“You know, when you were both using your eyes to talk.”
She smiled. “My mom is not too subtle. She was happy to see you were such a gentleman.”
She turned away from me and walked over to one of the two big black leather couches forming a massive L. She grabbed the remote and turned on the large widescreen TV. She walked over and turned the lights back off. The TV was now the only light in the room. She sat down right next to me. My pulse quickened; I had never been this close and completely alone with her. My nervousness made me cold and numb.
She grabbed a blanket that was draped over the couch and threw it on her legs. “Are you cold?” she asked.
I was ice cold, but even if I had been on fire, I would have still told her I was cold just to share the blanket with her. She scooted closer so the blanket would cover both of us. The room had a couple more blankets in it, but she chose to share with me. Is this what friends do—share blankets? She scrolled through the movie guide. She rattled off several movies and asked if I liked any of them. I was so nervous I nodded at every movie she said. Finally, she turned on a movie that I had never heard of and probably would never have picked out for myself. It was about women from the early 1900s.
The movie didn’t hold my attention, but still, it was the fastest two hours of my life. I didn’t want it to end. I had just managed to get my hand close to hers right when it ended.
“Thanks for coming over, Nicholas,” she said as we walked to the door. I had already put on my jacket.
“It was my pleasure, Elle. Can we do this again?” I asked, hoping she would say “Yes, how about tomorrow?”
“Well, of course!” She unlocked the door. I walked out and turned around.
“Goodnight, Elle.”
“Goodnight, Nicholas.”
My feet didn’t want to move; they demanded I stay longer. I couldn’t turn away. She smiled and started to shut the door. I reluctantly walked to the truck. The bitterly cold air was a shock to my body, allowing me to fully regain all of my senses for my drive home. After I got in the truck, I sat in the driveway for a moment. The light post flickered off and on. I flashed my headlights to say goodbye back.
Cora was waiting for me in the family room, wrapped up in one of her large down comforters.
“So
how was your night?”
“It was fine. We ate dinner and watched a movie.”
“Did they ask you a bunch of questions?”
“Well, of course they did. They were trying to get to know me.” Anger flared into my voice.
“I told you this would happen. You need to avoid those types of situations, Nicholas.”
“What are you talking about? They just asked me a couple of questions; they didn’t fingerprint me.”
“Nicholas, you don’t understand.”
“No, obviously I don’t. You need to make me understand. One moment you are okay with breaking the rules, and now you are upset with me for breaking the same rules. I’m tired of all this lying. I love her and I don’t want to move again.”
“If you love her, it’s even more important not to be around her anymore, because it will only break her heart!” Cora started to tear up. I didn’t understand what she was talking about. I didn’t want to argue with her. I had just had a great night.
“Cora, I am sorry. I know you are trying to protect me.”
Cora took a deep breath, collecting herself. She got up and walked over and hugged me.
“Sorry, honey, let’s talk about this later.” The conversation was over. She walked upstairs to her room, leaving me standing alone.
The phone rang and I answered it so quickly that I almost knocked over the lamp on the coffee table.
“Hello, Nicholas. It’s me, Elle.”
The nervousness from earlier welled up inside me once again. “Hey! Is everything okay?” I asked.
“Yes, I just wanted to thank you for coming over. And I wanted to know if you would like to come over,” she whispered.
“That sounds great!”
“Well, how about now?” she said.
“Are you kidding?”
“No, seriously, can you come over? I would like to spend more time with you.”
“Of course. I’ll be right over.” What was I saying? Cora would kill me, and I am pretty sure Elle’s parents would not want me to visit so late. It was already 11:00 p.m.
“Okay, Nicholas. Make sure you park on the street a couple houses down. Then come around to the back of the house. You will have to come down through my window. See you soon!”
The dial tone rang in my ear. How was I going to ask Cora about going over to Elle’s house again when she was so upset with me about everything that had to do with Elle?
I walked up the stairs to Cora’s room. The door was shut. The TV was on.
“Cora, I have to go out for a bit.” I waited for a minute for a response.
Cora opened the door and said, “Please don’t be late.” Her face was red and damp with tears. Before I could tell her that I was sorry again, she put her hand on my cheek and said, “Have fun,” and closed the door.
I got back into the truck. I couldn’t think about Cora anymore; I was on my way to see Elle.
I parked five houses down from Elle’s and made my way to the back of her house. I looked at the two window wells and saw one with the light on. I crept over to the window and looked down in it. Staring up at me was Elle, which nearly gave me a heart attack.
“You scared me to death,” I whispered. My breath was sending out a cloud of smoke from the cold air.
“Come on,” she said, stepping away from the window. I maneuvered down through the tiny window into her room.
“Wouldn’t it be easier if I came in the front door or even the back door?”
“It would be if you were allowed to be here. This is too late for a visit in my parents’ eyes. Also boys aren’t allowed in my room.”
“Aren’t you afraid we might get caught?”
“Well, I have locked my door and there are plenty of places to hide.” She smiled mischievously. “Nicholas,” she walked up to me, “I want to spend more time with you. You make me feel wonderful and the way you treat me . . . I love it. Is it okay with you if we spend a lot more time together?”
“Of course.”
“I want to get to know you better. Without any time limit and nobody listening in.”
“So you want to know where I used to live? Things like that?”
“No silly, I know you don’t like those questions. My questions will be easy, more about you. I want to know what makes you tick—like what’s your favorite color, your favorite flower, and stuff like that. I want to get to know you.” She placed her hand on my chest. “And if you want, you can ask me questions too.” I nodded.
“Come, sit over here.” She sat down in a chair that looked like a huge round disk that at least four people could sit in. I took my seat next to her. The curve of the chair forced us together. I had taken off my jacket and laid it next to the window just in case I had to make a quick escape.
“So what is your favorite color, Nicholas? We will start with an easy one.”
“It’s greyish-blue. Orange used to be my favorite color, but now it’s changed.” That was the color of her eyes, which were holding me captive, allowing her to get what she wants from me helplessly for eternity.
“So what’s your favorite color, Elle?” I asked quickly, hoping that she wouldn’t make the connection.
“Well, I like red.” Her room was decorated with red stuff everywhere. Her furniture was covered in red quilts and pillows. Her bed was covered with red stuffed animals. It fit her.
She then started asking me more questions. Starting with my favorite flower, then favorite food. Question after question. My fear of being asked questions had subsided because these were all questions that I did not have to lie about. These were all about me. I asked a couple of the same questions back, but I could tell she was on a mission to find out everything she could about me.
This went on for an hour. She started to slow down, only asking a question every couple of minutes. She started to close her eyes between them. She asked if I minded if she rested. I didn’t care. I was in heaven there with her. Her legs had gradually moved on top of mine, which made it very difficult for me to concentrate during some of the questions. I wanted to reach out my hands and put them on top of her legs, but I didn’t.
After a question about my favorite candle scent, she fell asleep. She lay curled up, motionless. I sat there for a while just staring at her, wondering how I was this lucky to be here with her.
After a while, I reached down, scooped her up off me, and put her in bed. I covered her up and turned out the light next to her bed. In the darkness, small stars and planets illuminated the ceiling. She was full of these little surprises. I smiled as I climbed back out of the window.
After that night with Elle, we began to spend all of our time together. I was still not sure how she felt toward me, if she wanted more, but I didn’t care. I was happy. For the first time in a long time, happy. My sickness and those horrible dreams had almost disappeared completely.
We spent all of winter break together. Cora and I went with Elle and her family to Christmas Eve service. I also spent Christmas with her. Cora and I celebrated the way we always did that morning. We exchanged presents while we watched It’s a Wonderful Life. Cora got me a bunch of new clothing. All of it, of course, matched the latest trends but still fit with my more conservative style. She also bought me the most incredible watch. It was engraved with a saying on the back: “Time is what you make of it. Love, Cora.”
I gave Cora her presents. I had bought her a silver platter that she had been eyeing for some time and a patchwork blanket that was like one we had a couple years ago that had been left behind in one of our many moves. The blanket had been given to her by someone close to her, but I never knew who. When she opened the blanket, she nearly cried.
“Thank you, Nicholas. This was so thoughtful.”
We ate a light brunch that Cora had been preparing for hours. Then I got ready to go to Elle’s. If Cora had any reservations about me going, she didn’t voice them.
The small Christmas that I was used to was exactly t
he opposite of Elle’s Christmas. Her entire extended family was all there. They were dressed in Christmas clothing. Elle and I didn’t get to spend much time together alone, but it was fine because this family Christmas was something I would cherish for the rest of my life.
Winter, like Christmas, went by fast; spring was on the doorstep. Right when Winsor seemed ready to thaw out, it was covered by ten inches of wet, heavy snow. The whole town was shut down and put on a Level 3 Snow Emergency. Only emergency personnel were allowed in the street. School was cancelled that very night.
“Nicholas, pick up the phone. It’s for you,” Cora yelled from the kitchen.
“Hello?”
“Hey, what’s up?”
“Eric, I figured you would be on your way to Livi’s by now for some quality time.”
“Nah, she wants me to stay home because ‘it’s too dangerous,’” he said just like he thought Livi would have sounded. “She threatened that if I came over, we would be done. So I wanted to see if you were up for doing something.”
“Eric, you know that it’s 9:00 and the snow is still coming down. I think we are going to get another couple of inches before morning.”
“You sound like a weather man. Of course I know we are getting more snow, which makes it even better for extreme tubing.”
I wanted to keep my options open because I hadn’t talked to Elle since school had been cancelled.
“Eric, I’m not sure if I can go out.”
“Give me a break, Keller. Just call Elle and get permission to hang out with your buddies, and call me back.” He was right. I wanted to spend as much time with Elle as possible.
Like Livi, Elle thought it was too dangerous for me to come over, but she told me to come over tomorrow morning after the plows had a chance to catch up. Then we would spend the day together. I really wanted to see her, but the promise of spending the whole day with her tomorrow would have to do. I called Eric and told him I was in for sledding. I got dressed in the thermal snow gear that Cora had bought me from one of the online ski shops. She always made sure we had appropriate clothing for any climate.
“Cora, I’m going out with Eric.”
She was putting some elaborate decorations on a cake that she had been working on most of the day. “Okay, but I don’t want you out too late.”
I walked outside and wandered over to the tree line to wait for Eric. I stared up at the snow-filled sky. The large trees around the yard were covered by snow. I began to drift off, thinking about Elle and our future together. The trees creaked as they swayed in the wind, but then there was a cracking sound that interrupted my daydream. One of the large trees was falling at me from out of the darkness. Time slowed and I moved easily out of the way of the trunk, but one of the larger limbs caught me and pinned me to the ground momentarily. I broke the branch with ease and popped up.
Two familiar silhouettes were standing up by the road. My heart stopped because beyond them was the sea green truck. A large SUV barreled down the road from the other direction. I moved toward them, but they were already in the truck, leaving. I examined the base of the tree; it had clearly been cut. They were trying to kill me.
Eric pulled into my driveway, but he wasn’t driving his Beetle. “Where’s your car?” I asked, still in shock of nearly being killed.
“It’s at home. Mom made my older brother let me borrow his truck. He’s home from the Marines, so I got to take out his baby,” he said with a big smile. On cue he revved the thunderous engine.
The truck was in between a monster truck and the truck Cora and I had. It was painted pumpkin orange, and it had so much polished chrome on it that headlights weren’t necessary.
“So what kind of truck is this?”
“It’s a Hummer—one they actually used in the military. Not like the ones that you can now buy. This came straight from the base. My brother spent a couple of years restoring it.”
“So where are we sledding, Eric?”
“You mean extreme tubing? Sledding is for kids. We are going over to Matt’s house. His backyard is perfect. He has an insane backyard for tubing.” In the back of the Hummer were three large inflatable tubes like the ones you use for water.
For the next couple of hours, we tubed in Matt’s backyard, which was actually part of a golf course. It was far better than any sledding I had ever done. The extreme part was dodging the large pine trees that littered the slope. We stopped and were just sitting on the tubes at the bottom of the hill. The snow had tapered off. The glow of freshly fallen snow lit up everything around us.
“So, Nicholas, are you dating Elle or what?” Matt asked.
“We are just friends,” I said.
“Are you kidding? You are attached at the hip. I even heard Oliver talking about you guys the other day at football conditioning.”
Eric joined the conversation. “Who cares what he thinks? He’s nothing now—just a complete and utter loser.”
“So, Matt, what was he saying?” I asked.
“Who cares what he said? Nicholas, he’s a loser,” Eric insisted, but Matt ignored him.
“He said that he had made Elle and that he was ‘done with that trash, anyway.’ You can have his leftovers.”
Elle was not that type of girl, and I wouldn’t let anyone talk about her that way. I became outraged. My body started to become tense. I felt the steam coming off me. My body was on fire. I was ready to fight Oliver and those two people who tried to kill me.
“Easy, Nicholas, he’s not worth it,” Eric said. “He’s just jealous of you and Elle. No one would believe that he was with Elle anyway.”
“Yeah, Nicholas, the group he was talking with didn’t seem to pay any attention to him.”
“I know, but I don’t like anyone, especially him, talking that way about Elle.”
Eric and Matt tried to change the subject, but I was furious. All I wanted to do was find Oliver and beat his face in.