“You’re not mad?” I got out, wiggling to get more room.
“Why?” She drew back, showing that her face was now wet from tears. “I never wanted you to do it in the first place! Each time you left to look for the staff or the spearhead, I’ve been terrified that you’ll never come back. It’s all I’ve been able to do to hold myself together these past few months. Good God, Ives, I have a white streak in my hair and I’m not even twenty! No, I’m not mad that you’re stopping. In fact, I’m so happy—” her voice broke “—I’m so happy I can’t even stand it.”
She dissolved into tears, and Adrian let me go so I could hold her. I stroked her hair and whispered reassurances that everything would be all right while, over her shoulder, I met Costa’s eyes. They were shiny with tears that didn’t hit his cheeks, yet his jaw was set in a hard line as he nodded at me.
I understand, that nod said. I didn’t know if he agreed like Jasmine did, but right now, his understanding was enough.
“So, your tattoos vanished after you decided to stop looking for the spearhead?” Jasmine asked with a final, teary sniff. “Guess that’s the supernatural version of having security throw you out after quitting.”
I let out a breathy laugh even though I felt more conflicted than amused. “Guess so. I saw Zach right before they disappeared, so I’m guessing he had something to do with it.”
“Zach was here?” Adrian sounded more surprised by that than by my decision to abandon my destiny.
“Yeah,” I said, giving Jasmine a last pat as I turned toward him. “He was waiting for me in the dining car after I checked on Brutus. He somehow knew what I’d decided, too. Guess he’d gotten a cosmic heads-up or something.”
Adrian’s eyes narrowed. “And he had nothing to say to you?”
I glanced away. I didn’t want to repeat what Zach had said. “Not much,” I settled on. “And it ended with ‘goodbye.’”
I could feel Adrian staring at me, measuring my words and locating the gaps between them. I tried to mentally erase the guilt, second-guessing and other emotions from my expression, but I must not have been that good at it.
“Give us a minute, guys,” Adrian said, opening the cabin door. Jasmine and Costa filed out after Jaz gave me a final hug. Adrian locked the door behind them, then turned around to face me.
I waited for him to speak, but without a word, he drew me into his arms. For several minutes, he held me, his warm, strong hands caressing away the bone-deep tension I hadn’t known was there until I finally felt it begin to loosen.
I closed my eyes as I rested my head against his chest. Oh, how I’d needed this! With every stroke of his hands, brush of his lips and tightening of his arms, Adrian was telling me that he loved me. Me, not the person other people wanted me to be, or what I was supposedly destined to be, or what I could be, if I only tried harder. Me: flaws, fears and all.
I took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Thank you.”
His short laugh was muffled against my neck. “For what?”
“This,” I said, drawing back to look at him. “I needed it.”
He stared at me, his eyes appearing bluer from the intensity in his gaze. “And I need you. That’s why I’m thrilled about your decision. I never thought the payoff was worth the risk.”
“It could have been,” I said, thinking about all the people still trapped in the realms. As soon as I did, that deep-seated tension returned, as did my guilt. Quickly, I tried to brush both aside. “But it’s not,” I continued, reminding myself as well as saying it to Adrian. “Zach all but confirmed that I had no chance to survive the spearhead long enough to save them.”
Adrian sighed, then rested his forehead against mine. “Don’t beat yourself up. You saved lots of other people, and you tried to save them, too. You’ve done enough, Ivy.”
I mustered up a shrug that looked far more laid-back than I felt. “The former hallowed weapons would seem to disagree. I abandoned my destiny, so they wasted no time in abandoning me.”
He pulled me back into his arms, lifting me until my feet were off the floor and our faces were level.
“Screw Zach and screw them,” he whispered fiercely. “They might have left you, but I never will.”
I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him, needing his strength, his unconditional love and acceptance, and the passion that flowed between us, covering my guilt, doubt and second-guessing. Right now, all I needed to be was me. Right now, the only thing that mattered was the two of us. In his arms, everything was finally as it should be.
“I love you, Adrian,” I told him between searing kisses. “You’re my only destiny now.”
CHAPTER TWELVE
WE ENDED UP going back to Vatican City, and not because I had fallen in love with it when we were here looking for the spearhead. The entire mini, walled city was on hallowed ground, and it had tight security due to its many famous treasures. I didn’t think it was a coincidence that Obsidiana had waited until we were away from Vatican City to send her minions to attack us, let alone come after us herself.
The added safety of the enhanced security combined with extensive hallowed ground had Jasmine visibly relaxing, and she wasn’t the only one. Adrian was as chill as I’d ever seen him, and I didn’t know if that was because of our surroundings or his relief over my decision to abandon the spearhead quest.
They weren’t the only ones basking in a newfound sense of relief. I didn’t fear the coming of night anymore, and I’d even taken to going on solo walks during the day. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d gone somewhere for the sheer, simple pleasure of it. Yet despite my newfound sense of security, all wasn’t entirely well.
I tried to hide my lingering feelings of guilt from Adrian, Jasmine and Costa, telling myself that it would go away in time. In the interim, I’d focus on being grateful, which was easy to do with the man I loved, my sister and our best friend at my side. Adrian had rented a lovely little villa inside the city walls for all of us. Everyone enjoyed it so much that our stay stretched from one week into two, and then two weeks into three. Even Brutus seemed to love it, staying inside during the day and then using his seagull disguise to fish from the nearby Mediterranean Sea at night.
By our fifth week, I was starting to feel good enough to confront one of my guilt-ridden phobias. “I’m going for a walk,” I told Adrian.
Both golden brows rose. “A little overdressed for that, aren’t you?”
I looked down at my lavender silk dress and my high-heeled sandals as if just now realizing I was wearing them. “Eh, maybe,” I said with as much vagueness as I could muster.
Adrian got up, and his gaze raked over me with a lot more suspicion now. “What are you trying to hide?”
I almost said, “Nothing!” but then I stopped myself. Why wasn’t I telling him what I was really going to do?
“I’ve been avoiding churches,” I explained, beating back my inexplicable urge to lie. “Abandoning my destiny made the paranoid part of me wonder if I’d be smote on the spot if I entered one, but I know that’s ridiculous. So, I want to prove it to myself by going to one today.”
“Oh,” Adrian said. Then his lips began to twitch as if he were fighting not to laugh over my smiting fears. “I’ll go with you.”
“You don’t have to. This whole thing is silly.”
“Ivy.” The smile wiped from his face as he came over to me. “It doesn’t matter,” he said, taking my hands. “Silly or serious, if something is bothering you, I want to be there. Whatever it is, we’ll face it together.”
I squeezed his hands, once again wondering why I’d tried to hide this from him in the first place. “You’re right.”
Now he smiled, and it warmed me more than the bright day outside. “Let’s see, we didn’t spend much time in Saint Peter’s Basilica before, and it is one of the
main attractions here.”
“Not there,” I said. The basilica felt more like an incredibly elaborate museum than a church. “Saint Stephen’s of the Abyssinians.”
That reminded me of a more antique version of the church my parents had occasionally taken Jasmine and me to when we were kids. After everything that had happened, I longed to feel the same sort of normalcy I’d felt back then.
“I don’t think that’s open to the public,” Adrian pointed out. “Unless you want to break in, you might have to pick another one.”
I gave him an arch look. “I have a way around that. You’ll have to dress up to make it work, though.”
He chuckled and went to get dressed. When he came out ten minutes later, he wore cream-colored pants, a matching open jacket and a pale blue shirt that made his eyes appear an even more vivid shade of sapphire. Combined with his golden hair, six-six height and face that looked half-angel instead of half-demon, he was so stunning, there was no chance of him going unnoticed.
“I might have to make you wait outside, or you’ll ruin my plans to blend in,” I said, giving him an admiring stare.
He came over and tipped the brim of my hat back. “You’re the one everyone will look at,” he said, and bent to give me a deep kiss.
I broke it off when I found myself thinking about abandoning my plan in favor of spending the day in bed with him. “Behave,” I told him, wiping a smear of my lipstick from his mouth even as it curled into a smirk.
“Who, me?” he asked with mock innocence. “Always.”
Right. Behaving wasn’t in his DNA, let alone his personality. Still, he could be incentivized. “You’ll be glad later if you do,” I said in my most suggestive voice.
Now his grin was every shade of wicked.
It didn’t take long for us to reach the small chapel. Saint Stephen’s of the Abyssinians might be closed to regular public foot traffic, but it could be rented out for private weddings. Late summer in Rome was apparently a popular time for them, and today had more than one nuptial on the docket. My plan was simple: pretend to be one of the many guests so I could sneak in. When a thick cluster of guests approached the chapel, I grabbed Adrian’s arm, pasted a smile on my face and followed them inside.
Adrian let me choose our seats, and I picked ones in the back. As I sat down, I found myself tensing. If any of my fears were founded, now would be the time for something awful to happen. Yet as the minutes ticked by, nothing did.
“See?” Adrian murmured, gently squeezing my hand. “You’re fine, Ivy.”
Now I felt even sillier for letting my lingering guilt make me so paranoid. “Let’s go, before someone notices that we don’t belong here,” I whispered.
We left the church. It had been a sunny, beautiful day ten minutes ago, and now that I’d left my irrational fears behind, it seemed even brighter and lovelier. Adrian and I were enjoying a leisurely stroll back toward our villa when I realized that I’d have to find a bathroom sooner rather than later. My previously bunched-up nerves must have given me an upset stomach.
“I need a bathroom,” I told Adrian. “Have you seen one?”
Thankfully, he had, and I almost ran inside it. A short time later, I was washing my hands when the bathroom mirror began to ripple in a frightening way.
I hadn’t broken the mirror when I’d entered because we were on hallowed ground, but it wasn’t too late to fix my mistake. I grabbed the nearest trash can, about to bash it into the mirror, when an all-too-familiar voice said, “Don’t!” Then it went on to say, “I believe we’re long overdue for a chat, Davidian.”
I paused in midswing. Demetrius, Adrian’s biological father and my arch nemesis, had never wanted to chat before. He’d tried to kill me more times than I could count and held my sister hostage as bait, but one-on-one conversation? That was new. Still, it was daylight and I was on holy ground, so if Demetrius did try to cross over in another attempt to kill me, he would fry as soon as he left the mirror. The thought of seeing him burning and screaming appealed to me so much, I lowered the trash can.
“What did you want to talk about, Daddy-in-law?”
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
DEMETRIUS’S FULL APPEARANCE became visible in the mirror, so I caught it when he winced, as if being reminded of our new familial tie had caused him actual pain. I’d hoped it would. It certainly stung me a lot.
“Never call me that again,” he bit out.
“Believe me,” I said, glaring at him. “I find it mutually repellant.”
Demetrius was one of those demons who looked like a regular person. He had unremarkable features, black hair, pale skin and a wide mouth, so Adrian must have gotten his gorgeous golden looks from his mother. A closer inspection revealed that a writhing mass of darkness clung to Demetrius’s outline. His shadows had once been far larger and more impressive, and they weren’t Demetrius’s only trick. He was also a shape-shifter.
The first time I’d seen him, Demetrius had morphed into a huge dark cloud with flesh-ripping claws and teeth. That form had been beyond terrifying, which was why he’d chosen it. Demetrius was as cruel as he was inventive.
“What, no congratulations on the happy news?” I continued to needle him. “It’s a shame you missed the wedding. It was thrown together last-minute, but still, it was beautiful—”
“Speak softer, before Adrian hears you and storms in here,” Demetrius snarled.
He’d revealed a lot with that statement. While Demetrius could have guessed that Adrian was with me in general, he shouldn’t have known that Adrian was close enough to possibly overhear us. Unless...
“You have minions watching us right now, don’t you?” I said, trying not to show how much that freaked me out.
Demetrius rolled his coal-black eyes. “Of course I do.”
I casually crossed my arms behind my back so my hands were hidden from his view. Demetrius had never seen my staff tattoo, but he was well acquainted with my slingshot. I’d decimated his formerly immense shadows with it, and the last thing I wanted was Demetrius seeing that it was missing. Then he’d know that I’d lost my only deadly form of defense against him.
“If you’ve got minions tailing us, why haven’t you used them to try to kill me?” The danger I’d unknowingly put everyone in made my stomach roil, but I managed to ask the question as if the answer only mildly interested me.
Demetrius smiled, and the sight of it sent chills rippling over my skin. I’d never known that a smile could be a messenger of evil before I’d met Demetrius.
“Because at this particular moment in time, I’m not trying to kill you.”
“You’re not, huh?” I said while getting my rattled nerves back under control. It couldn’t be because he’d had a change of heart—Demetrius hated me. That was clear in his burning ebony gaze. But he must have something else up his sleeve. “I don’t imagine we have long before Adrian figures out that something else is going on besides me having digestive issues, so if you don’t want me dead, what do you want?”
“You’ve been here too long to still be searching Vatican City for the spearhead, so why haven’t you left?”
His arrogance was astounding. He thought I owed him an explanation for my recent activities?
“Yeah, this has been nice, but you can go fuck off now,” I said, heading for the door.
“Wait!” The command in his tone didn’t make me pause, but his next words did. “It’s because you’ve given up looking for the spearhead, haven’t you?”
If I didn’t know better, I’d swear he sounded disappointed. I swung around in disbelief. “What’s it to you, demon?”
“More than you realize, Davidian,” he said, giving the same insulting emphasis to my lineage as I’d given to his species.
Why? Demetrius had pulled out all the stops to prevent me from finding the first tw
o hallowed weapons. How could he suddenly have something invested in my finding the final one? “How so? I know you don’t care about freeing the trapped humans, and that’s all the third weapon’s good for.”
“Simple. Twit,” Demetrius said, sounding out each insult as if I wouldn’t understand them otherwise. “Did you truly believe that was the spearhead’s only power?”
I bristled. “Zach never said it could do anything else—”
Demetrius’s laughter cut me off. The demon even bent over, as if his spine couldn’t bear the weight of his mirth.
“What’s so funny?” I asked acidly.
He held out a hand as if too overcome to audibly ask me to wait while he attempted to control his mirth. Well, screw him! I was more than halfway to the door when Demetrius, still chuckling, said, “You can leave now, but Adrian’s life depends on you staying to hear me out.”
I stopped, still fuming, but unwilling to let my pride cause me to miss out on possibly useful information just because I hated its source. Demetrius was evil, but in his own twisted way, he loved Adrian. He’d even let me escape once after he’d gotten the drop on me because Adrian had been dying, and I’d had access to the manna that could save him. If Demetrius said that refusing to hear him out could cost Adrian his life...then there was a fifty-fifty chance that he might be telling the truth.
Besides, he knew where I’d been these past several weeks. Hallowed ground might stop him, but it was no barrier to minions, as the attack at the Mother See in Armenia reminded me.
“Make it quick,” I said shortly.
“Zach didn’t tell you that the spearhead has another, equally powerful function, but is that a shock?” Demetrius asked, his voice a taunting purr. “Archons might not lie, but even you can’t be so obtuse as to believe that one would tell you, a mere human, the entire truth if he didn’t want to.”
Zach did have an infuriating tendency to leave out a lot of important details. Case in point—Demetrius being Adrian’s father. Zach had kept that bombshell a secret for years.