* * *
The memory began with Cailean waking up early that morning, still dark out, stepping lightly around the camp trying not to wake anyone. Still tired from his restless night’s sleep, the events with Andraste plagued his dreams. He sighed, glancing back to his tent, his body urging him back to bed, but a soft voice whispered in his head, Save The Queen.
Cailean ran a hand through his tousled hair and breathlessly whispered, “I have to.” His glossy eyes promised tears.
He crept over to Nikolaos’ tent and nudged him awake. “Nik, wake up. Brian wants us all to gather in the cave past the field.” Cailean nudged him once more for good measure.
“I’m up, I’m up,” Nikolaos mumbled, grabbing his sword and rubbing the sleep from his eyes.
“Can you wake your brothers up psychically?” Cailean added before leaving Nikolaos’ tent.
“Sure,” Nikolaos said, a hint of pleasure in his tone. Leo, Cole. Nikolaos started out sweetly. Wake up boys! He screamed in their minds and then bit his blanket to muffle his cackle.
Nikolaos laughed to himself as he heard Cole and Leo swearing at him mentally.
Nikolaos emerged from his tent and poked his head into Cole’s tent to make sure he was up. Cole smacked Nikolaos with a pillow then followed him out of his tent. Cole and Nikolaos proceeded to Leo’s tent where they found him asleep again. They both jumped on him and lightly punched him wherever they could until he got up.
Cailean waited patiently behind the tents, Tears still burning for release.
“Ready?” Cailean sounded depressed. The brothers assumed it was because they were up so early.
“What in the gods’ names are we doing up before the sun?” Leo looked around, barely able to see through the dark.
“Brian wanted a meeting, probably to prepare in case of a night attack. I believe the cave he found has an exit we could escape through,” Cailean explained as he led the brothers down through the practice field.
“And you’re telling me this couldn’t wait until the morning? Andraste already rudely woke us up. Now Brian has to as well?” Cole yawned.
“Och, you know how Bri is. Always needs to be properly prepared,” Cailean forced a light chuckle.
Cailean’s chest tightened as he guided the brothers through the field. A ball of pain grew in his heart with every step he took. The nausea in his stomach demanded him to turn around. However, an image of Brian having to make this awful decision popped into his head and he continued with his plan, determined to save his brother from the awful fate that awaited him.
“Let’s just get this over with. Leo needs his beauty rest,” Cole yawned.
Leo dug his elbow into Cole’s side. Cole chuckled and slung an arm around his little brother’s shoulders as they followed Nik and Cailean.
Days earlier, Cailean discovered a hidden cave past the field where they practiced. He now guided the brothers through the winding cavern. “He shouldn’t be too far down. Soillsich,” A blue light appeared in front of the men as they walked deeper into the cave.
“Brian?” Cailean shouted. He then hovered a hand over his throat and whispered, “Ailis.” Brian’s distant voice answered back, but it was Cailean’s mouth from which the sound escaped, “I’m down here, Cail. Did you bring the brothers?”
“Yeah, we’re all here, you rooster. Why in Hades did you wake us up so damn early?” Leo answered the fake voice.
“You’ll see whe…” Brian’s disembodied voice responded. Cailean’s lips trembled, causing the last word to break up and trail off.
The men turned a sharp corner and came across a doorway big enough for one person to enter at a time.
Cailean stepped aside and motioned with his arm for Nikolaos to go through. Cole and Leo followed with Cailean bringing up the end. Once inside, the brothers lazily gazed around to see the rest of their group. Instead, they stood in an empty room with only the light Cailean conjured.
“What’s going on, Cail?” Nikolaos beseeched his longtime friend.
Cailean stared at the floor and rubbed the back of his neck. “I am so sorry.” His words trembled as his burning tears streamed down his face. “A decision had to be made, and I am making it to spare Brian and your sister. Destiny has led us down a dark path. I am so sorry I have to be the one to do this.”
Cailean raised his head to retain what little respect he had for himself and look the brothers in the eyes as he did the unthinkable. They stared back, confused and cautious.
Nikolaos lifted his arm, a small gesture, to comfort Cailean. Cailean mistook the move as aggressive and jumped back through the doorway. Nikolaos raced towards the door, but before he reached the exit, Cailean raised his hand and shouted, “Ciur Caisg Air!”
Frost sprung up from the ground and cold white light blinded everyone in the cave. Cailean could not believe what he had done. He hunched over, leaned against the wall and hyperventilated. The massive guilt of betrayal brought him, a grown man, to blubbering tears.
He sprinted back through the cave and up through the practice field before the light vanished, revealing the aftermath of his spell work. Silent tears kept his face wet and puffy. He grabbed several long, thin pieces of firewood and conjured them into a bow and arrows. He thought hunting might calm his nerves, but deep down he knew nothing would take away his guilt.