“Well, it usually involved my not wanting to give something up or accept some new aspect of my life. I’m a very logical person, Travis, and at times like those it comes in handy. I think I’m going to be utterly miserable if I give in to God, but then I take stock of my present situation and learn that I’m already about as miserable as a man can get. It usually doesn’t take too much longer after that to surrender my will to God’s. And I’ll tell you something, Travis. Nothing in the world can compare to the peace of God.”
Travis licked his lips. It was on the tip of his tongue to tell Robert that God would want nothing to do with him if He knew what a hatred he had felt for his father over the years or what a mess he’d made of his marriage, but very swiftly Travis knew how foolish such thoughts were. God was God. He knew it all anyway. Why was that so suddenly clear to him?
At the same time Travis realized Robert was right. He couldn’t get much more miserable than he was right now. However, he wasn’t certain of the next step. Should he read the Bible? If he suddenly agreed with God that everything bad happens for a purpose, would that give him peace? And what about Rebecca? If he began to pray and read the Bible, would God tell him if she was all right?
“You look like you have a lot on your mind.”
Robert’s comment broke into his thoughts, but Travis could only nod. Robert could see that he didn’t want to talk, so he let it pass. Their food arrived before the silence grew too long, and when the meal was over Travis rode out of town without ever having told Robert what was on his mind.
Pine Grove
Preston lay back in bed and watched Angel brush her hair before the tall mirror in his bedroom. He had been a fool. He told himself if he could just claim her as his woman, it would be enough, but it wasn’t, not even close. Every time she spent the night, he wanted her to stay for the rest of the day. Every time he saw her in his kitchen, he wanted her there forever, across the table from him or working side by side on a meal. He wanted her clothing hanging in the closet beside his, and her hairbrush on the dresser by his own. For weeks now they had been intimately involved, but it wasn’t enough.
The first night he’d asked her to come to dinner and she’d accepted without a moment’s hesitation came rushing back to his mind. He’d known such regret that she had been so swift to agree he wished he’d asked sooner. He wasn’t going to wait and think about this for weeks; he would ask her just as soon …
His thoughts cut off when he realized she was staring at him in the mirror. Their eyes locked and held, but Preston didn’t speak until Angel turned and continued to look at him.
“Move in with me,” he commanded her softly and watched as her eyes grew tender.
“I wondered what was on your mind.”
“You are. And I want you here all the time.”
He watched her sigh.
“What are you thinking about?”
“Becky. Dan has been seeing someone pretty regularly, and I’m here all the time.” She paused. “I can’t just leave her and the boys.”
“I don’t know why not. You told me the two boys drive you crazy.”
Again she sighed. “It’s funny really; it’s the first love-hate relationship I’ve ever been in. I love it when they let me hold them or when they stand still while I talk to them, but when they wrestle on my bed and get into my clothes and makeup, I could kill them.”
Preston was quiet for a few minutes, his eyes still on her as he weighed his next words. Finally he ventured, “Have you ever thought that it might be a relief for Rebecca if you were gone.”
Angel’s brows rose.
“I mean,” he went on easily, “the boys could have your room, and she wouldn’t have to worry about them disturbing your things.”
He could see that he’d made her think, but her face quickly clouded.
“She couldn’t afford it, Preston. She does all the domestic work around the house, but she isn’t even doing outside laundry right now, so mine is the only income.”
“Well, give her some warning. She could have a small business going by the time you leave.”
“She’s tired enough right now with just the boys and the house.”
“Well, if she doesn’t like the idea of supporting herself, she could go home to her husband.”
Angel flinched. He sounded so cold, but part of her was complimented. He wanted her to move in badly enough that he was willing to dump Rebecca in the street.
“Tell me something, Angel.” His voice was now soft and beguiling.
“What?”
“If Rebecca wasn’t in the picture, what would your answer be?”
“Yes,” she answered instantly and noticed that he did nothing to hide his pleasure. She was feeling pretty pleased herself and joked, “Should I be afraid that you’re going to have my friend and her sons disappear?”
“No.” Preston’s mouth was stretched into a grin. “But if Rebecca and the boys are the only thing holding you back, then just leave it to me.”
Angel’s face suddenly grew serious, but she wanted this as much as he did.
“You’ll be gentle, won’t you, Preston?”
“Indeed I will, almost as gentle as I am with you.”
Angel’s eyes turned tender with love. She had learned many things about Preston in the last few weeks, and at the top of the list was that when he cared for someone it was with his whole heart. Angel found herself hoping that Rebecca would take the news well, because in her mind she was already half-packed.
Boulder
“I wish you had come to me, Travis, and told me what was on your mind. I could tell you were searching, but I wasn’t sure what the questions were.”
“It was pride,” Travis replied, his voice telling of his peace. “I thought I had to do this on my own. I see now that it was only pride.”
“Tell me about it.”
“Well, do you remember about five weeks back when I first came to church?”
“Of course.”
“You knew I was fighting God. I was tormented all the way home, and when I got there I went for a Bible that has been in an office drawer for years. I picked it up and began to read. At first I was taken aback by how swiftly violence entered the world, but then I remembered what you said about God’s purpose for sending His Son. If people hadn’t sinned there would have been no need.
“I still have questions,” Travis now added, “but I also know, just like Job, that my Redeemer lives and that I’ll see Him some day.”
Robert’s smile was huge. “I’ve prayed, Travis. I’ve prayed with all my heart that you would understand and believe. What was it, Travis? What was the turning point for you?”
“I think a combination of things, like the reading I was doing. I read through the book of Genesis but then went to the New Testament. Matthew is a great book, and I saw for myself that Christ was more than just a man: He was God’s Son. Also, you said something when we met on Wednesday. You said that your grandfather told you God was very patient, but also that no man knows when he is going to die. I thought about Morgan. Did he take care of things between himself and God before it was too late? It’s impossible for me to know, but I would say probably not since he never planned to die.
“I went home that night and thought of nothing else for the next 48 hours. Then it was so late last night when I finally knew I wanted to believe that I waited until this morning to come.”
Robert’s chest rose on a deep breath. The men were sitting in the banker’s office, and he was pleased they hadn’t been disturbed.
“There are no words to tell you what I’m feeling right now, Travis.”
“I think I understand. I do have questions, though. Is there a time we can get together?”
“Sure. Today after work or tomorrow after church. Either one is fine, and I’ll tell you all I can.”
“Let’s do it tomorrow. Today I’m headed to the reading room to see if there are any books over there.”
“That’s fine, Travis, bu
t I will warn you of one thing.” Robert reached out and tapped Travis’ Bible. “This must be your final authority. God’s Word alone must be believed and obeyed.”
Travis looked a little uncertain about Robert’s remark, and Robert prayed for him. Travis was a child when it came to a saving knowledge of Christ, and Robert recognized it might take time for his friend to understand that there are no half measures with God, that God wants to be everything to His children. Indeed, Robert knew He would settle for nothing less.
22
Rebecca stood very still. Preston had been gone for some time, but it felt as if time stood still. She didn’t want to cry, and she wasn’t angry. She only felt numb. Did Preston know that just that morning Dan had come to tell her he was marrying his girlfriend? Dahlia was pregnant, and Dan had found that he really did care for her. Rebecca was pleased—she didn’t want him pining over her—but she suddenly felt all alone in the world. Dan was getting married, and Angel was moving in with Preston.
Two weeks. Preston said that he and Angel had decided two weeks ago that this was what they wanted, and he’d been working since then to make it possible for all of them.
“Every single worker at the Bell complains about not having their laundry done right,” he’d told her. “It could be a huge business for you.”
“But where am I going to do this, Preston? It’s hard enough to boil water now without fear of the boys being scalded.”
“The dining room,” he had answered immediately. “I’ve got a plan to convert the dining room for you, a plan that includes a partition; well, a gate actually. You can look out, but the boys won’t be able to get in.”
And that had been just the beginning. For every question Rebecca raised, Preston was ready with an answer. She had thought he’d come to see Angel, who was still asleep upstairs, but he’d come to tell her the news.
A noise came from upstairs, and Rebecca’s head turned toward it. The boys would be tumbling down anytime now. She could never get them to bed on time, but at least they slept late in the morning. And then there was Angel. Once the boys came down, she would soon follow. In the past she had been able to sleep through anything, but now the boys were too boisterous.
Rebecca didn’t have to ask if that was part of the reason Angel was going; she knew her housemate had no patience with her overactive sons. But did Angel know that Preston was going to talk to her today? Because she felt like they had plotted against her, the question raced around the small blonde’s mind. There seemed to be no answers.
Rebecca turned now and looked toward the dining room. The table and chairs were made of a lovely wood, but no one ever used them. Everyone always ate in the kitchen. Rebecca hadn’t mentioned this to Preston, but she now thought about how tired she was with just the boys and housework. How would she ever make it through days and days of laundry? Of course, Preston had said that Angel would rent the house to her for as long as she lived in Pine Grove. If that was the case she wouldn’t have to clean it at all.
On that thought her chin rose in the air. The boys were laughing their way down the stairs right now, and Rebecca went to kiss them good morning. She still felt like her world was caving in, but no one—not Angel, Dan, or Preston—was ever going to know that.
“What in the world do you have on?” Angel exclaimed as she found Rebecca in the living room. Rebecca smiled before she turned in a circle to model the sacklike dress she wore. It gave her no shape, and the color was dreadful.
“Don’t you like it?” Rebecca faced her and asked.
“No, it’s hideous,” Angel told her bluntly, which only widened Rebecca’s smile.
“Good! Maybe my male customers will get the hint.”
“Becky.” Angel’s voice took on a patient tone, but Rebecca stopped her with a hand in the air.
“You are the last person who can give me advice about men, Angel. You knew Preston for four years before you would even get near the man.”
“But Becky, I still dated, at least a little. You don’t have anyone.”
“That’s the way I want it,” she said firmly. “I’m just surprised that it’s taken me this many months to figure out what I should do about it. I do not want to attract attention. I’m not into casual flings, and the men who bring me their laundry are not looking to settle down with a ready-made family.”
As if she’d mentioned the family by name, the boys suddenly came bursting into the room.
“Angel!” they shrieked, and the older of the two women steeled herself against their onslaught. They flew at her as usual, each bumping and shoving the other for position to hug her. Angel ended up with one in the front and one in the back. She was smiling down at them until someone mashed her toe.
“Boys!” Rebecca warned when she saw Angel’s face. “Stop it! Garrett! Wyatt! That’s enough!” But in typical fashion they ignored her. It was some minutes before Rebecca made herself heard, but the boys left Angel’s tangled skirts only because they heard a dog barking out front. Angel sighed, straightened her skirt, and then sent Rebecca a telling look.
“You might find a man who wants a ready-made family if you would discipline those boys once in a while, Becky.”
“I know, Angel,” she said tiredly. “I try, but I just can’t seem to punish them.”
Angel only looked at her. “I’ve got to go.”
“All right. Don’t forget the boys’ birthday is Friday. We’re having cake at 7:00.”
“Preston and I will be here,” Angel assured her, parting on those words. What she didn’t tell Rebecca was that she would plan on wearing one of her older gowns. The twins, with the excitement of their second birthday, would certainly be more out of control than usual.
Boulder
“Well, friend, this is your last Christmas as a single man.”
Robert’s eyes twinkled. “It’s a tough job, but someone has to do it.”
Travis chuckled and reached again for the turkey platter before passing it to his guest. Robert declined, but had some more potatoes and gravy. Both men were more than satisfied when they set their napkins by their plates.
“Well, that was the meal to end all meals,” Robert told his host as he rocked onto the back legs of his chair.
“Lavena is a real find, I assure you, Robert. If your Eddie needs any help with the house or cooking, just pop out here to the ranch for a few tips.”
Robert chuckled, thinking of the scones and tea Eddie had prepared when he visited in September. He shook his head at Travis. “I think my Eddie will do just fine, but thanks for the offer.”
“Speaking of Eddie,” Travis continued, “what were her plans for the day?”
“She’s with her family, including Uncle Mitch, and I think Clay Taggart and his family had been invited to join them.”
“You’ve mentioned Clay Taggart several times,” Travis commented.
“Yes. I was very impressed. He lives in Georgetown. He’s a mine surveyor, but he’s not caught up in that world of trying to get rich quick. Eddie tells me that his dream is to teach school.”
“Well, we can certainly do with some well-qualified men and women for that profession,” Travis said fervently. “If the rumors in town can be trusted, Boulder’s new schoolteacher is not what they hoped she would be.”
“Yes, I’d heard that as well. It’s a large class, and I don’t think she’s assertive enough.”
Lavena chose that moment to scurry into the room.
“That was a feast, Lavena,” Robert told her.
She managed to look pleased without smiling. “Did you save room for pie?” she demanded.
“Not at the moment,” he admitted, hands in the air.
Lavena speared Travis with her eyes. “You see that he stays around long enough to enjoy some of my pie, Travis Buchanan.” With that she was gone.
The two men shared a smile.
“Lavena has spoken,” Travis said with a false shudder.
Robert laughed. They rose from the table and made thei
r way to the living room. A fire crackled in the huge stone fireplace, and they both sank into comfortable chairs near the blaze.
“Tell me the date again.”
“March 14,” Robert answered without hesitation. “Eddie and her mother set that date because her father wanted her to be 18½ before we married.”
“That’s about 3½ months from now,” Travis said thoughtfully. “And what day do you want us to leave for Georgetown?”
“I think we better go March 5. Is that going to work for you?” Robert asked his best man.
“What if I said no?” Travis teased.
Robert smiled. “I think I’d get up and go tell Lavena that she has to run the ranch for you in March whether she likes it or not.”
“You can’t do that,” Travis warned him. “She’d probably do a better job and never let me have it back.”
The men fell silent for a time. It was a comfortable silence that lasted until they were almost drowsy, but then Robert asked Travis if this Christmas were different for him.
“You mean because I’ve come to Christ?”
“Yes.”
Travis stared at the fire for a moment. “It is different because there’s an awareness now that there’s more than just me. Now there’s a God in heaven whose Son came to earth. For so long I never thought of anyone but myself. Maybe I’m still too selfish.”
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t know if you realized it, but Tuesday was my anniversary. I believed in Christ seven months ago that day. And because of that, it’s like Christmas is not as set apart. It feels as though I’ve celebrated Christmas every month from that day.”
Robert thought that was one of the most special things he’d ever heard. He thanked Travis.
“For what?”
“For reminding me. I need to celebrate Christ’s birth all year long, and I don’t.”
Travis smiled and nodded. He knew that Robert was often the teacher and he the student, but Robert never failed to thank him if something he said was a rebuke or a reminder. All of this turned Travis’ thoughts to Eddie Fontaine. Travis had yet to meet her. He hoped and prayed she would be as special as the man she was marrying.