“I do not kno-a what you mee-in,” said Little Bad Wolf.
“I see,” said Tom. “Which part do you not understand?”
“All,” said Little Bad Wolf.
“OK,” said Tom. “Do you have a television?”
The two wolves shook their heads. Despite the fact that he had been treating them as little children, Tom had hoped they would know who he was and would have seen him on TV. Most humans he met saw him on TV before he met them. He then remembered. They were not most humans. They were wolves. So Tom started explaining about his television programme and the interview which would happen in 30 minutes. He had already told the director who wanted him in the studio that she would have to wait a minute. As he went on with his explanations he realised the wolves were very smart and understood what he was saying. It took him a while longer to realise that only one of them was speaking and she was the only one who could talk. The other could clearly understand but only Little Bad Wolf could talk.
He brought them up to the studio as he was still explaining. Tom was getting more and excited about this. He had seen animals who were supposed to be able to talk on TV before, but they were parrots or dogs who knew tricks. This would be different. This was an animal which could actually talk and have a conversation.
Tom’s programme lasts for one hour and when they had some big item they usually kept it until last. They told Little Bad Wolf that they would do this with her. She and her aunt were brought into a room with a lot of televisions and a big desk with lots of knobs. The woman who had tried to hurry Tom was there. She had headphones and microphone and was giving instructions. Tom went into the other room and sat on a very comfortable looking chair. They then saw and heard Tom from the TV set. The programme was live and the first thing he said was tonight they were going to have the first live interview with a wolf, or any other animal, live on TV.
Neither wolf could understand what was going on but they were aware that every so often Tom would say, "Stay tuned for the interview with the wolf". The woman who seemed to be in charge was also getting more excited. She kept telling Little Bad Wolf how many minutes to the interview. She would also point to a computer screen which told her that other television stations would tune in for the interview. She explained that when one station had got something interesting some other stations would rebroadcast it and they would pay for this. They already had a good number of stations who were intending to show this part of the show live. With five minutes to go the woman told Little Bad Wolf what the questions would be. It turned out she was completely wrong on every single question.
According to the woman, Tom would start by asking her about her life and what the life of a wolf was like. He didn't. His first question was, "How many languages do you speak?"
This question seems simple but it confused Little Bad Wolf. She spoke the Dog/ Wolf language but she was sure this was not what he meant. She answered “One” and then added, “One hoo-man lang-ich”.
“Yes,” said Tom. “I had not thought of that. This wolf here speaks one human language but probably lots of animal languages. Do you want to be an interpreter between Man and Animals?”
Little Bad Wolf replied that she did not know what he meant. After Tom explained that he was asking her would she become an animal who explains what animals were thinking to human, she said no. She laughed at this idea of a small wolf like herself speaking on behalf of some very big animals.
“So why did you decide to come into the studio to talk to us today?” asked Tom.
“We wuz capatured,” said Little Bad Wolf.
“Did you say captured?” asked Tom.
“Yes. Two faramers. They had guns. They mayade us come to here.”
At this point, the woman in charge on the other side of the glass was getting frantic. Little Bad Wolf could see her mouth “Change the subject!” and Tom looked like he had just realized that it might be a good idea to talk about something else.
“So, how did you learn our language?” asked Tom. He was hoping that the wolf would not want to continue her description of how she had been taken from near her home by two men with guns.
Luckily for Tom Little Bad Wolf was perfectly happy to answer his question. “The ray a dio,” she answered.
“The Radio! So you don’t like television then.” Tom made a silly face and laughed at his own joke.
“I like the ray a dio,” said Little Bad Wolf.
“So tell me, How did the radio help you?” asked Tom.
“I listen to mew sic,” answered Little Bad Wolf.
“So you learnt the language of people by listening to music on the radio?” he asked.
Little Bad Wolf nodded and said “yes”.
“So which music do you listen to?” asked Tom.
“Mew-sic on the ray a dio,” answered Little Bad Wolf. She was thinking that this was a silly question since she had already answered it.
“I know that,” said Tom. “What I meant to ask was: Is there any singers or groups you particularly like?”
“I liy-ick all sorts,” said Little Bad Wolf. “Rich-mound fun-tan, ahh-bah, Elvis, Rian ahh-dams”
“That’s typical,” said Tom. “It happens every time I talk to a young person, and now animal, I have only ever heard of half of the music they like. It’s time to end our interview. I am wondering could you give the viewers out there a good old fashioned wolf howl to say goodbye.”
Little Bad Wolf said “no”.
Tom laughed. “Not even a small wolf howl.”
“No.”
Tom laughed again and said good night to his viewers.
Little Bad Wolf and her aunt left the television studio in a very different way they had come. A big car with a driver who opened the door for them brought them to their field. There was even someone there from the local newspaper who wanted to take a picture of the talking wolf. He had a lot of trouble trying to tell Little Bad Wolf and her aunt apart, and it was a picture of the aunt which appeared in the paper the following day.
Television seemed to change everything and do it very quickly, The wolves heard the day after Little Bad Wolf had been on television that the plan to build a new supermarket on their land had been suspended and the land was now known as ‘The Wolves’ Forest’. A few days after this, Little Bad Wolf was accepted into school for the next term. She was very excited. She was very happy. She was very hopeful. It did not take long after she started school for everything to go wrong again.
Part 2 School Days
Chapter 12 The Wolf Must Go
Most people know of two types of school noises. There is the sound of a few hundred pupils learning. A sort of hum that gets louder as you near a classroom door. Then there is the break noise. Those same few hundred pupils have all got something to say and are going to say it whether anyone can possibly hear them or not. This is the sort of noise that only the most experienced teacher can switch off. It is noise which comes from the near complete silence as the pupils anticipate the break to them filling up every little bit of ear-space. However, there are many more types of noises than these two. There is also the peaceful sound when the school has said goodbye for the day to all those pupils and the teachers can sit and chat before going home.
Today, at the time when the school should have had that peaceful noise, there was a very different noise coming from the head teacher’s Office. The sound of fear. The teachers inside the room did not look scared but they were. They had never seen the head teacher, Mrs Hurray-Bill, so angry. Each one of them had seen her lose her temper and heard her shout at them before, but this was different. She had already spilt her coffee, fallen from the chair, tried to hit the table and missed. Mrs Hurray-Bill had not even noticed that her glasses had fallen on the floor and the long heel of her shoe was very close to breaking them.
“Who had the great idea of bringing a wolf into this school,” she yelled, banging the table again and this time hitting her knuckles against its side.
> Nobody mentioned that she had told the newspaper it was her idea. Actually she said that she and her husband, the Mayor, had decided on this. “Promoting better inter-species relationships,” “Promoting the rights of oppressed animals,” “Challenging stereotypes.” These were all phrases she had used in the interview with the Village Tribune. This was just after Little Bad Wolf had appeared on television and everyone wanted to be friends with the talking wolf.
Despite the fact her hand was hurt and she had a bad track record in saving it from injury, she tried to bang it against the table again. This time she missed and hit her knee. Some of the teachers had to bite their lips to stop them smiling as Mrs Hurray-Bill looked at her sore knee.
“It was not just any wolf we invited to join our school. Was not the name a bit of a giveaway? Before Little Bad Wolf came to this school how many wolves’ names did we know? One! And guess what, it is the same name. Who had the crazy idea of letting a Bad Wolf into this school? A relative and, not just any relative, the daughter of Mr Big Bad Wolf himself.”
The protesters always looked and sounded as if there were more of them. Sometimes up to fifteen parents protested outside the school at times but usually there were only eight or nine. There were six who were always there and the others came once or twice a week. They would walk up and down outside the school gates with placards saying things like ‘School for Children, not Wolves’, ‘Sheep are not the only ones frightened’ and the most common one ‘Who’s afraid of the Little Bad Wolf? – I am!’ This was also the song they chanted as they walked up and down. Although most of the time they did not sing or do anything other than stand around talking.
Everyone else in the room expected her to continue shouting for the next ten minutes but she had finished. She was looking at the room. Glaring angrily at them waiting for an answer.
“Well?”
Ms Potterer, the science teacher, burped. She did not mean to do it but for some reason she did this when she was nervous. It was not even a real burp. More like a gentle throat clearance.
“Well, Ms Potterer, What wisdom do you want to give us?” said Mrs Hurray-Bill.
Ms Potterer had not got anything to say but felt she had to say something.
“In my class, Little Bad Wolf is a very good student. She has difficulty in doing some of the experiments. Paws, you know. Very difficult for her to lift test tubes. She sometimes gets Matt or Louise to help her a bit with this.”
Ms Potterer was feeling much more comfortable now and was about to tell how she was the best pupil at memorizing the periodic table of elements when the head teacher interrupted.
“Potterer! What nonsense are you talking?” Mrs Hurray-Bill then mimicked her with the voice of a little girl “She’s such a good little pupil” before starting to shout again. “I’m not interested in her ability to blow up the science lab in the interest of knowledge.”
Ms Potterer decided that she would not correct her by pointing out that Patrick had blown up the science lab. While she was thinking about this, she was reminded of the wonderful way her pupils managed to create a fantastic firework display from very simple ingredients. She didn’t notice that the head teacher was also thinking about something.
Mrs Hurray-Bill eventually broke the silence. “Tell me about it, Potterer.”
“Excuse me, Mrs Hurray-Bill but what should I tell you about.”
“Good grief. You complain all day that your pupils don’t pay attention and then you do the same thing.
Ms Potterer did not correct her that she had never complained of this. Indeed in her class, they were usually very alert.
“The day she tried to blow up the school,” shouted the head teacher.
Ms Potterer knew what she was talking about and also knew that the Little Bad Wolf had an alibi but she decided to risk fate.
“I am sorry, but I do not know what you mean.”
“What?” said Mrs Hurray-Bill. “The science lab goes boom and you don’t remember. Your favourite little pupils lighting up a few sticks of dynamite or something similar. You don’t know what I mean.”
“Oh you mean two weeks ago when I and several of the pupils had gone to the science exhibition. Yes, I do remember it now. I left my class in the capable hands of Mr Clogs."
The assistant headmaster, Mr Clogs, blushed. Ms Potterer was about to continue but looked at Mr Clogs and decided not to embarrass him further. Mrs Hurray-Bill was not as sensitive.
“It does not matter who was teaching the class. The point is that Little Bad Wolf was clearly one of the ring-leaders and no-one, not even Clogs, who did a good job of controlling an uncontrollable class, reported her to me. If they did everything would have been settled. She would be gone. No more wolves amongst our lambs.”
Ms Potterer cleared her throat but before she started to speak Mrs Hurray-Bill was again shouting at her. “I don’t want you saying anything in defence of her. This wolf must go. I am going to investigate the attempted destruction of our school laboratory and these trouble makers can go make trouble elsewhere.”
“There is one thing you should take into account,” said Ms Potterer.
“The one thing I should take into account is how quickly I can get rid of this trouble maker,” yelled Mrs Hurray-Bill.
“Headmistress,” said Ms Potterer. “Little Bad Wolf was not in school that day. She was with me at the science exhibition.” I also think that you might not want to expel the pupils who caused this explosion.”
“She’s right, Headmistress.” Mr Clogs spoke with a very sheepish voice which was unusual for him. “Patrick and Claire were the kids who caused this problem.”
At the mention of the two children Mrs Hurray-Bill went pale. Another teacher might have thought for a moment that she would have to punish these two students. Mrs Hurray-Bill did not. Their parents were very kind to school. Only yesterday she had met Claire’s father and he once again had promised to help them decorate some of the older classes with a very large donation. Claire’s father was also one of the parents protesting outside the school gate. She went pale because she wanted something, anything, which would help her get rid of Little Bad Wolf. She thought she had found a way to get rid of her but now found she had not.
“I have an idea,” said Mr Clogs. He was normally cautious and knew his headmistress well enough to know that she would not easily be persuaded unless his plan had some hope of success. But taking a risk would at least deflect attention from an investigation into the science laboratory incident.
"Elocution." He looked at Mrs Hurray-Bill expecting her to clap but she just repeated "Elocution" followed by "What on earth do you mean?"
“An elocution exam,” explained Mr Clogs. “I think it is only right that pupils should be able to speak well and clearly before coming here. If for example a pupil could not pronounce certain words it would be best for her, or indeed him, to go to another more suitable school or even the infant schools for an extra year.”
Ms Potterer had had enough. She walked out to the sound of a very happy Mrs Hurray-Bill. “Yes brilliant! We will have an exam and if a pupil can’t pronounce certain words then they can’t stay here. Sorry, I mean if they can’t pronounce certain words it would be better for them to go a more suitable school.”
Chapter 13 Children Should Be Seen and Not Heard
No one ever knew who started the rows. Maybe both Aunts Martha and Matilda started at exactly the same time. Most rows start with one person saying something which the other person does not like and boom, boom, boom, pretty quickly you have a full-blown row. I guess that one of the aunts had started this particular row but it was difficult to say which one. Martha had been the one who had been in favour of Little Bad Wolf going to school. She had said it would be a great achievement. She spoke of it in the same way as older people speak about Neil Armstrong walking on the moon. Matilda had warned them what could happen. They will never accept a wolf. They will find out about her father. Wolves are not mad
e to go to people’s schools. Now they were both arguing but taking completely different sides.
“We should just give up on this,” said Martha. “People will never accept a wolf at the children’s school.”
“We can’t give up now,” said Matilda.
“Why not? Should we be pushing the child through this,” said Martha. “You have seen those people shout at her. Who’s afraid of the Little Bad Wolf? Have you ever heard such nonsense?”
“Now you mention it, no I have not.”
In the corner was Little Bad Wolf. She was crouched up, listening to this. Little Bad Wolf was thinking that the one thing worse than when you are being talked about behind your back is when you are being talked about in front of you. She made a small bark to let them know she wanted to say something.
They did not hear and Martha continued, “We need to do what is best for Little Bad Wolf.”
“I suppose you are right,” said Matilda.
Little Bad Wolf barked again, this time slightly louder.
“So we are agreed. Little Bad Wolf should leave the school,” said Martha.
It is said that children should be seen and not heard. When it comes to people this is clearly ridiculous. All you need to bring noise to a room is put a child in there. However, this saying is true for wolves. Young wolves do not speak in front of the elders unless they are asked. Little Bad Wolf had never before interrupted an adult wolf so her two aunts were very surprised when she started to talk.
“I would like to stay.”
The two aunts continued their argument. Actually the argument had stopped and they had come to an agreement that Little Bad Wolf would leave the school. They were in the process of agreeing that this would happen as soon as possible when Little Bad Wolf interrupted again.
“I would like to stay.”
They had heard her say this the last time as well but had not paid enough attention. Now the two aunts stopped talking and started staring at her.
“I am sorry,” said Aunt Martha. “What did you say?”
“I said that I would like to stay at school.”
“You can’t. We have already reached an agreement,” said Matilda.
“Do I not have a ..,” started Little Bad Wolf who then started stuttering as she tried to pronounce “say”.