I would give just about anything to be an artist. I thought about it all last night. I fear no one will believe the sights we have seen because of my inability to record them with any accuracy. If I had only pursued this skill in my younger years ... but there is nothing that can be done now.

  I followed the river last evening and found there are five beautiful falls, not one. Our portage around them is going to take considerable effort....

  CAPTAIN LEWIS sent Joe Fields downriver with a letter for Captain Clark, telling him we had found the Falls and suggesting a location for the lower portage camp. Then he and I set off for a ramble.

  We walked past the Falls, which the Captain was particularly drawn to. There was a small island between two of the upper falls. In the center of the island was a dead tree towering above the others with a gigantic bird nest perched in the top branches.

  "Bald eagle."

  A large black bird with a white head and a yellow beak sat on the edge of the nest feeding her brood. We were close enough to see the downy eaglets open their black beaks for the food she offered. The Captain brought out the red book and tried to capture this scene, but again he ended up ripping pages out of his journal.

  "Let's go, Sea. I'm more skillful with a rifle than I am with a pen."

  We walked up to the last falls, from where we could see an immense flat prairie cut in two by the meandering Missouri River. Ahead of us was a smaller river that flowed into the Missouri, with a thousand buffalo grazing next to its shore.

  "Perhaps we should shoot some dinner in case we don't have time to make it back to camp before dark."

  A brisk wind blew toward us. Not being able to pick up our scent, the buffaloes continued to graze, unconcerned at our approach. The Captain picked a young cow out of the group. He steadied his rifle on his espontoon and fired. She was hit squarely, but she didn't fall over. The herd moved a short distance away from her and continued grazing. As we watched her bleeding out, the fur on my back came to attention. I turned my head. There was a grizzly behind us, not twenty steps away. My barking brought him up on his hind legs. Captain Lewis snapped his rifle to his shoulder and pulled the trigger. There was a sickening click He had forgotten to reload after he shot the buffalo.

  "Run, Sea!"

  The grizzly was right on our heels. We ran to the river. The Captain splashed into the water up to his waist, then turned around and pointed his espontoon at the grizzly. I thought surely the bear would come in after us, but when he saw the espontoon he skidded to a stop, turned, and ran away.

  "That was a bit of good luck."

  That was a miracle. The grizzly continued to run, glancing back every once in a while to make sure we weren't chasing him.

  "I think we'll leave the buffalo cow for Mister Grizzly."

  We rambled over the smaller river and explored it for a few hours. On our way back across the prairie an animal we hadn't seen before came out of its burrow and snarled at us. It looked like a cross between a wolf and a cat. Captain Lewis fired at it, but it disappeared back into its den and didn't come out again.

  We hadn't taken three hundred steps from the den when two bull buffalo charged us.

  "I don't think they know what we are," Captain Lewis said. "Let's have some fun, Sea." He walked right at the charging buffalo. As soon as they got close enough to see we were a man and dog, they reeled around and ran away.

  "It appears that all the beasts in the neighborhood are in league to destroy us." Captain Lewis chuckled. "Perhaps we should head back to camp before our luck sours."

  I think this was among the happiest days the Captain ever had.

  June 16, 1805

  This afternoon I rejoined Captain Clark below the Falls and found Sacagawea gravely ill. After a battle of wills, I finally prevailed upon her to swallow some of our medicine, although I am not convinced it will do her any good....

  "I DON'T KNOW what else to do," Captain Lewis said. He looked down at Bird Woman. She was finally asleep.

  Captain Clark cradled Pomp in his arms. "What do you think she has?"

  "I wish I knew. Stomach cramps, fever, no appetite ... it could be anything. If the fever does not break soon, we're going to lose her."

  "I want to take her home," Charbonneau said.

  Captain Lewis looked at him like he had lost his mind. "Home?"

  "To the Hidatsa village."

  The Captain pushed Charbonneau out of the lodge so they wouldn't disturb Bird Woman.

  "Listen, you old fool. Your wife is in no condition to travel. She can't even stand! If she died along the way, what would happen to your son? How would you feed him?"

  "Begging your pardon, Captain. But the only reason you want her to continue on is for her to help you get your horses."

  Captain Lewis flushed in anger, and for a moment I thought he might strike Charbonneau. He took a deep breath. "We have grown very fond of your wife and son," he said slowly. "My only concern is for their safety. I will do everything in my power to save her, but if you ever accuse me of jeopardizing a member of this party to accomplish my goal, there is nothing on earth that will save you, Mister Charbonneau!"

  Charbonneau took several steps backward.

  "Do I make myself clear?"

  Charbonneau nodded and Captain Lewis went back into the lodge.

  The captains spent the evening in the lodge tending Bird Woman and discussing how to make the sixteen-mile portage around the falls.

  "We'll have to leave the white pirogue here," Captain Lewis said. "It will be hard enough to get the smaller dugouts overland."

  "I'll have the men begin making carts for the dugouts tomorrow," Captain Clark said. "I guess when we get above the Falls we'll have to make more dugouts to carry—"

  "We shouldn't need them," Captain Lewis interrupted. "We have the iron boat. There's an island above the Falls that will be perfect to put it together. We can start portaging the pieces first thing in the morning. I'll have the boat floating by the time all our supplies are on the island."

  Captain Clark was not nearly as optimistic about the iron boat as Captain Lewis. "Sacagawea seems to be showing some improvement," he commented, changing the subject.

  "She's not out of danger, but you're right—she does appear to be getting better."

  June 23, 1806

  I write this from our camp on the island above the Great Falls. I have named this White Bear Island because of the number of grizzlies in the neighborhood. Although we are five miles away from the nearest falls, we can hear their roar.

  We have stored the white pirogue and made another cache of supplies at the lower portage camp for when we return.

  The boat frame arrived today and I have enlisted J. Fields, Sergeant Gass, and John Shields to assist me in putting it together. The boat is 36 fret long and should serve our purposes admirably once it's afloat. I overheard a few of the men referring to my boat as the "experiment" the other day. They don't seem to believe the boat will float, but I'm confident they are in error, just as they were about the true course of the Missouri.

  The greatest challenge now is finding a sealant to waterproof the seams of the skins. If I had known that finding pitch for this purpose was going to be so hard in this area, I would have collected it downriver and brought it with us. I am experimenting with a new sealant made of charcoal and tallow, which we have used with great success in the past to patch our canoes....

  CAPTAIN LEWIS'S greatest challenge was his iron boat, but my greatest challenge was the grizzlies. White Bear Island was crawling with them. During the day they kept their distance, but at night while the men slept they became bolder. The men slept with rifles loaded and fires burning brightly, but I think it was my angry barking that kept the bears away.

  The men's greatest challenge was getting the canoes and supplies around the Falls. The ground was steep, covered with prickly pear, and rutted with dried buffalo tracks that were as sharp as arrows. The men pushed and pulled the heavy carts over this rough ground an inch
at a time. Every few feet they had to stop and rest. When they lay down they fell asleep, and Captain Clark had to kick them to wake them up. Of all the hardships they had suffered on our journey, this portage was by far the worst. On some days, when the wind was blowing right, they were able to raise the sail on the canoes, which eased their burden a little. But on most days the weather did not help matters. Strong winds, thunder, lightning, rain, and hail assaulted the men, adding to their labor.

  When Captain Clark left White Bear Island to retrieve the last dugout canoe, I went with him. I doubt Captain Lewis even noticed when I left. The only thing on his mind was readying the iron boat.

  York, Bird Woman, and Pomp accompanied us across the windy plain to the lower portage camp. A few miles before we got there we were caught in a terrible rain-and-hail storm. We took shelter in a deep gully. Bird Woman unstrapped Pomp from his cradleboard, stripped off his wet clothes, and started to dry him as best as she could. Then we heard the water. A second later it was upon us.

  "Flash flood!" Captain Clark shouted "Climb!" He grabbed Pomp and handed him up to York, then took Bird Woman by the arm and dragged her up behind him.

  The water swept me away, pushing me a hundred yards down the gully before I was able to clamber out onto the prairie, where I was greeted by wind-driven hail the size of musket balls.

  "Run to stay warm!" Captain Clark shouted above the blasts of thunder.

  When we arrived at the lower camp, we found men as naked as little Pomp, huddled around the fires trying to dry their clothes. They were covered with bruises and cuts from the pounding hail.

  July 4, 1805

  Our country's 29th birthday. To celebrate we poured the last of our whiskey, and the men are having a merry time by the sound of it.

  I am very discouraged this evening. The boat is taking much longer than I thought. With rain and hail every day, the skins will not dry. I am worried we will not find the Shoshones. Worried we will not make it over the mountains before winter....

  CAPTAIN LEWIS was sitting near the iron boat with the red book in his lap, his pen in his hand, and his last glass of whiskey at his side when Captain Clark found him.

  "I wondered where you had gotten to. What are you doing down here by yourself?"

  "I'm afraid I'm not very good company this evening."

  Captain Clark sat down next to him. "What's on your mind, Meriwether?"

  "Nothing, really."

  "How long will you give the boat?"

  "What do you mean?"

  "How long will you wait before we push on without it?"

  "You don't think it will work, either?" Captain Lewis was clearly surprised.

  "It was a good idea," Captain Clark said carefully. "But no, I don't think she'll float."

  "The boat will work! All we have to do is seal the seams and she'll take us all the way to the Pacific."

  "Providing there's an easy portage to a navigable river, which you know there may not be."

  "Have you lost faith in the Northwest Passage?"

  "A little," Captain Clark admitted. "Those mountains are much bigger than we expected."

  "Regardless," Captain Lewis said, "we'll sail this boat as far as we can."

  The captains sat in silence for a long time.

  "I've been thinking I should take a large party out hunting," Captain Clark said. "The Hidatsas warned us that there are few buffalo above the Falls. We'll need extra meat to get over the mountains."

  "Give me the men for a few more days," Captain Lewis said. "The skins are nearly completed."

  "Of course." Captain Clark stood. "I hope I'm wrong about the boat, Meriwether, but if for some reason it doesn't work, you can't blame yourself."

  July 8, 1805

  I believe the sealant we're using for the boat will work admirably until we get to the mountains, where there mil be trees with the type of pitch we need to do the job right.

  Captain Clark has taken most of the men on a hunting expedition. My boat should be ready to float by tomorrow....

  I JOINED CAPTAIN CLARK and discovered he was not looking only for meat. As soon as we got out onto the prairie he divided the men and took his small party to the Medicine River.

  "While you're hunting you might keep your eyes open for trees that are big enough to make canoes."

  "And animal specimens for Captain Lewis," added Drouillard. "You know how new creatures cheer him up."

  The men knew. They also knew that the iron boat was not going to work and the Captain would need something to distract him from the failure.

  We returned that evening with a kit fox and a live squirrel. Captain Lewis barely looked at the new animals, saying he would get to them later when he had more time.

  The next afternoon Captain Lewis launched his experiment. The boat wasn't in the water more than five minutes before almost every seam split in two. It quickly filled with water and settled on the shallow river bottom. The only person who seemed surprised was Captain Lewis.

  He waded out to the iron boat and examined several seams. No one spoke. When he got back on shore he walked over to Captain Clark and said, "We'll have to make canoes."

  "I'll go out tomorrow morning and see if we can find suitable trees," Captain Clark said, not mentioning that he had already marked several for this purpose.

  "While you're doing that we'll dismantle the boat and bury it with anything else we don't need. I'm going for a ramble. Let's go, Sea."

  This was the hardest ramble I ever took with the Captain. A mile away from camp he started mumbling to himself. A half mile farther he started shouting.

  "Fool! Idiot! The men knew the boat would sink, but your pride made you deaf to their logic. You delayed the party by two weeks. Those two wasted weeks just might kill every man!"

  He continued on like this for another mile. I lagged behind him several yards. Seeing him act like this was more frightening than any of my encounters with grizzlies.

  We came to a small stand of trees. The Captain, still berating himself, picked a heavy limb up off the ground and began bashing it against a tree trunk over and over and over again until he was too weak to swing. He fell to his knees and covered his face with his bloodied hands.

  I lay twenty feet away shivering with worry. After a very long time, the Captain quieted and looked up with red-rimmed eyes. He looked right at me but didn't see me. He took several chest-heaving breaths, then lay back against the tree he had beaten and fell asleep.

  Because of the grizzlies, White Bear Island was probably the worst place in the world to take a nap alone. I kept my eyes and nose open for trouble, and that's when I saw White Feather. I wanted to run over to him, but I felt that my place was next to the Captain. Directly below White Feather stood Drouillard, calmly scanning the flat prairie with his rifle cradled in his thick arms.

  The Captain slept for a long time. When he awoke he was better, but still not himself. We walked back to camp and found Captain Clark in the lodge scratching in his journal by dim candlelight.

  Captain Lewis looked around the lodge and saw Bird Woman, Pomp, and Charbonneau fast asleep under their blanket. Drouillard was not lying in his regular spot. "Where's Drouillard?"

  Captain Clark looked up from his journal. "He said he was going to sleep out with the men tonight."

  This was the first and last time I ever heard Captain Clark tell an outright lie to Captain Lewis. He knew Drouillard had followed us.

  "That's strange."

  "Charbonneau made boudin blanc tonight," Captain Clark said. "We saved some for you." He uncovered the plate.

  Captain Lewis looked at the sausage. "I don't recall getting angry with Charbonneau today." Captain Lewis took a bite of sausage. "WillI am, the next time you catch me doing something prideful like this boat, for god's sake please stop me."

  Captain Clark grinned. "I'll try." He put his journal away and got under his blanket.

  Captain Lewis gave me a sausage link and finished the rest himself.

  Ear
ly the next morning Captain Clark took some men to the Medicine River to make canoes. The men who remained sewed new moccasins, dried meat, and packed supplies. In the afternoon Captain Lewis had them disassemble the iron boat and bury the pieces in a hole like they were old bones.

  July 15, 1805

  Once again we are moving west. The canoes are heavily loaded and several of the men must walk alongshore, as there is no room for them in the boats. If only I could have gotten the iron boat to work! But that is in the past and I need to let that failure go....

  BUT THE CAPTAIN could not seem to let it go. When we were alone on rambles he still talked about the boat, which led him to talking about other failures, until it seemed like he had never succeeded at anything in his entire life. He talked of the times he drank too much and said things he should have held inside. How he had left his mother and brother to manage their property and holdings because he could not contain his lust to wander. His failure to find a woman who could love him as he loved her. The list was long, but none of these failures seemed to amount to much to me compared to everything he had accomplished in his life. He was a skilled botanist, biologist, woodsman, hunter, and tracker, and a wonderful commander. He had successfully led a group of men almost all the way across the continent into lands never before seen by his tribe. And he was only thirty years old.

  The day after we left White Bear Island, Captain Lewis led Potts, Lepage, and Drouillard ahead of the canoes to hunt and get a better look at the mountains.

  Once again food was scarce, but young geese were plentiful and I thought they would be easy for me to catch as they could not fly yet I came across a flock and gave chase. As I was about to put my mouth on one of the downy morsels, a bold mother goose descended upon me and showed me that her wings were used for more than flying. She pummeled me with them and bit my ears until I was nearly senseless. I gave up trying to catch her pup and ran for my life. She pursued me with her feathered fists nearly a quarter mile upriver before she decided I had been punished enough. The men laughed so hard at the sight, they had to sit down where they stood. Even Captain Lewis managed to smile, an expression I hadn't seen for a while. The beating I'd taken was worth that little smile of his.