"It took you eight months to choose a name for your child. Three days isn't that long for a dog."
Ava shrugs. "Good point." She wipes down the table as I cover the leftover food and put it in the fridge.
"I thought about giving him a math-related name, since Graham loves math so much. Like maybe naming him after a number."
Ava laughs. "It's so weird that you say that. I just got my files at work today for the high school foreign exchange students I'll be tutoring when they arrive in a couple of weeks. One of them is a girl from Texas. Her birth name is Seven Marie Jacobs, but she goes by Six. I thought of Graham when I saw that."
"Why does she go by Six if her birth name is Seven?"
Ava shakes her head. "I don't know, but it's quirky. I haven't even met her yet but I already like the girl." Ava pauses and looks up at me. "What about naming it after one of the characters in your book?"
I shake my head. "Already thought of that, but those characters feel like actual people now that the book is finished. I know it's weird, but I want the dog to have his own name. I'd feel like he was being forced to share."
"Makes sense," Ava says, resting her hands on her hips. "Any news from your agent?"
"She hasn't submitted to publishers yet. It's being reviewed by an in-house editor and then they're going to try and sell it."
Ava smiles. "I hope it happens, Quinn. I'm going to freak the fuck out if I walk into a bookstore and see your book on the shelf."
"You and me both."
Graham walks inside with the puppy and Ava meets him at the door. "It's late, I gotta go," she says, talking to the puppy while scratching him on his head. "I hope when I see you tomorrow you have a name."
Graham and I tell her goodbye and he locks the door behind her. He cradles the puppy in his arms and walks over to me. "Guess who used the bathroom twice so his mommy and daddy can get a few hours of sleep?"
I pull the puppy out of Graham's arms and squeeze him. He licks my cheek and then rests his head in the crease of my elbow. "He's tired."
"I'm tired, too," Graham says, yawning.
I put the puppy into his crate and cover it with a blanket. Neither of us knows anything about dogs, so we've been reading as much as we possibly can about how to crate-train them, what they eat, how they should be disciplined, how much they should sleep.
Sleep has definitely been the most difficult thing to tackle so far. Being the owner of a new puppy comes with new hurdles, but the biggest of those hurdles is exhaustion. I wouldn't trade it for anything, though. Every time that little puppy looks at me, I melt.
Graham and I make our way to the bedroom. We leave our door open so we can hear the puppy if he starts to cry. When we crawl into bed, I roll toward Graham and rest my head on his chest.
"I can't imagine what having a newborn must be like if a puppy is this tiring," I say.
"You're forgetting about all our sleepless nights with Coriander, Paprika, Cinnamon, Saffron, Juniper, and Parsley."
I laugh. "I love you."
"I love you, too."
I curl even more into Graham, and he tightens his hold around me. I do my best to fall asleep, but my mind keeps running through potential puppy names until I'm positive I've exhausted every name in existence.
"Quinn." Graham's voice is against my ear, warm and quiet. "Quinn, wake up." I open my eyes and pull away from his chest. He points behind me and says, "Look."
I half-turn and glance over at the alarm clock, right as it changes to midnight. Graham leans in to my ear and whispers, "It's the eighth of August. Ten years later and we're happily married. I told you so."
I sigh. "Why am I not surprised that you remembered that?"
I don't know how I didn't expect this moment. The number eight holds so much meaning to us that the date should have been obvious to me, but I've been so preoccupied with the puppy the last few days, I didn't even realize today was the eighth of August.
"August," I whisper. "That's what we'll name the puppy."
Acknowledgments
* * *
With every book I write, there are people in the beginning who get the scraps I end up throwing away. I ruin plot twists for them. I change story lines. I make reading my words a little bit of a confusing chore. Especially with the many versions of All Your Perfects. A huge thank-you to Kay Miles, Vilma Gonzalez, Marion Archer, Karen Lawson, Lauren Levine, Vannoy Fite, Kim Jones, Jo Popper, Brooke Howard, and Joy Nichols for always being honest. And there.
To Tarryn Fisher. I love you and your whole stupid family.
Thank you to my agent, Jane Dystel, and her amazing team!
Thank you to the amazing Atria Books team. To my publisher, Judith Curr, for the past five years of support. To Ariele Stewart, my NPTBF. We can probably drop the first letter of our acronym now. To Melanie Iglesias Perez, thank you for all you do! Which is a ton! And to my editor, Johanna Castillo. When I try to write how much I appreciate you, words seem dumb. I love you.
Thank you to CoHorts. A group of book-loving people who boost my ego and remind me daily of who I want to be.
Thank you to FP. The original 21. I credit all the good in this career to that first year. The love, support, and excitement we all held for one another is a thing of beauty. I will never forget it. I will always appreciate each one of you.
To my boys. My beautiful, wonderful men. Thanks to your father, my life would still be complete if I never had any of you. But I will never take for granted that I do have you. You bring joy to my life every single day. I hope you never stop asking me to tuck you in at night. You make me so proud.
And to my husband, Heath Hoover. The only times I've ever seen you come close to crying are when you're proud of your family. Nothing makes me love and appreciate you more. Almost everything good in my life is because of you.
READING GROUP GUIDE
This reading group guide for All Your Perfects includes an introduction, discussion questions, and ideas for enhancing your book club. The suggested questions are intended to help your reading group find new and interesting angles and topics for your discussion. We hope that these ideas will enrich your conversation and increase your enjoyment of the book.
INTRODUCTION
Quinn and Graham's relationship had an unconventional beginning. Both reeling from having been cheated on by their significant others, they part as odd acquaintances, only to meet up again months later and start up a whirlwind romance. They fall in love quickly, their relationship so easy that it seems destined to be. But eight years into their marriage, the dreams they shared at the beginning seem impossibly out of reach, and the promises they made to one another have turned sour as they hide from each other the anguish and frustration they feel at not being able to have children. In the end, the reminder of who they were and how they felt for each other before this Category 5 struggle began might be the only way to save their marriage--or the irrefutable proof they need to end a relationship between two people who no longer recognize each other as the person they fell in love with.
TOPICS AND QUESTIONS FOR DISCUSSION
1. Sitting in the hallway outside Ethan's apartment, Quinn cracks open a fortune cookie that reads "If you only shine light on your flaws, all your perfects will dim." How does this foreshadow the present-day scenes in the novel? Discuss the stark contrast between the "Then" and "Now" chapters.
2. When we see them "Then," Quinn and Graham's relationship seems effortless. "Now," faced with the challenges of the present that have built up over eight years of marriage, their relationship could potentially fall apart in an instant. Can a relationship based on "kismet" last the test of time?
3. What began as a beautiful dream of shared parenthood with Graham becomes a single-minded and solitary obsession with conceiving for Quinn. Discuss the differences between how she was "Then" versus "Now." How has her self-esteem and self-perception been affected by her inability to conceive?
4. Quinn and Graham's marital problems stem from miscommunicatio
n, misunderstandings, and secrets. Why is it so hard for Quinn to express her true feelings to Graham? Why does Graham pour his heart out in letters, only to lock them away in the box?
5. Aside from the pressure she places on herself, society's expectations and others' constant questions of when she and Graham will have a child of their own weigh heavily on Quinn. In what ways did this affect her pursuit of motherhood and her relationship with Graham, her sister, Ava, and others? Do you think she would have reacted differently if she'd had a better relationship with her own mother? Or a support group of women who'd gone through the same experience?
6. On page 71, as she's getting over Ethan, Quinn thinks, "When you associate yourself with another person for so long, it's difficult becoming your own person again." However, think about everything Quinn has gone through to have a child with Graham. In what ways has she lost her identity to the concept of being a mother at any cost? Is she truly doing this for herself, for Graham, or for the people they imagined they would be ten years from their wedding night?
7. In Chapter Fourteen, as Graham drunkenly confesses a fraction of his frustrations with how things are between them now, Quinn retreats deeper into herself. What does this moment mean for their relationship? Discuss other ways in which this scene could have unfolded to avoid--or worsen--what followed.
8. When Graham proposes on page 213, he asks Quinn to weather the "Category 5 moments" with him. In the midst of their struggle with not being able to have children, they both seem to have forgotten that promise. What do you think led each of them to believe that it was their sole responsibility to fix things? What stopped them from having the courage to confide in and confront each other?
9. On page 11, referring to Ethan's cheating on her with Sasha, Graham says, "Do not forgive him for this, Quinn," but he insists that she listen to his side before making a decision about them after his own indiscretion. Compare the two instances of infidelity. Why did either man stray? Are either of them forgivable? What would you have done in Quinn's place?
10. On page 200, an old man in his eighties who had been married for sixty years gives Quinn very honest marital advice, saying, "Our marriage hasn't been perfect. No marriage is perfect. There were times when she gave up on us. There were even more times when I gave up on us. The secret to our longevity is that we never gave up at the same time." How does this tie into the fortune Quinn reads at the beginning? Identify the moments in which each of them gave up. Did they ever both give up at the same time? How did that affect the outcome?
11. What role did the box play in Quinn and Graham's relationship? Do you think all couples should go through a similar exercise?
12. If you've read Colleen's Hopeless trilogy (Hopeless, Losing Hope, and Finding Cinderella), you may notice a special cameo in the Epilogue. If you know Six's story, what could this connection potentially mean for Quinn and Graham?
ENHANCE YOUR BOOK CLUB
1. Take a moment to write a love letter to your partner, seal it in an envelope, and hide it away. Pull it out in times of distress to remind yourself of why you love them and the promises you once made to each other. Now, write a love letter to yourself. Keep it close at hand and re-read it every time you're being particularly hard on yourself as a reminder of all the reasons why you deserve love and happiness, even in your darkest moments.
2. Have an open and honest discussion about infertility and the societal pressures placed on women to be mothers with members of your book club and/or at home with your family and friends.
3. Visit resolve.org (run by the National Infertility Association) to learn more about infertility, find and/or give support, and keep the conversation going.
4. To learn more about Colleen Hoover, check out her other books, and find her on tour, follower her on social media and visit her at https://www.colleenhoover.com/.
Read more from #1 New York Times bestselling author Colleen Hoover
Ugly Love
* * *
Confess
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November 9
* * *
It Ends with Us
* * *
Without Merit
* * *
Slammed
* * *
Point of Retreat
* * *
This Girl
* * *
Losing Hope
* * *
Finding Cinderella
* * *
Maybe Someday
* * *
Maybe Not
* * *
ORDER YOUR COPIES TODAY!
About the Author
* * *
COLLEEN HOOVER is the New York Times bestselling author of fourteen novels, including Maybe Someday, Ugly Love, and It Ends with Us. She has won the Goodreads Choice Award for Best Romance three years in a row. In 2015, Colleen and her family founded The Bookworm Box, a bookstore and monthly subscription service offering signed novels donated by authors. All profits are distributed to various charities each month to help those in need. Colleen lives in Texas with her husband and their three boys. Visit ColleenHoover.com.
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ALSO BY COLLEEN HOOVER
Slammed
Point of Retreat
This Girl
Hopeless
Losing Hope
Finding Cinderella
Maybe Someday
Ugly Love
Maybe Not
Confess
November 9
It Ends with Us
Without Merit
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This book is a work of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people, or real places are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places, and events are products of the author's imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or places or persons living or dead is entirely coincidental.
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Interior design by Alexis Minieri
Jacket design by The Book Designers Jacket photograph (c) Shutterstock Author photograph by Chad Griffith Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Names: Hoover, Colleen, author.
Title: All your perfects : a novel / Colleen Hoover.
Description: First Atria Books hardcover edition. | New York : Atria Books, 2018.
Identifiers: LCCN 2017053852 (print) | LCCN 2017055146 (ebook) | ISBN 9781501171604 (eBook) | ISBN 9781501171598 (hardcover) Classification: LCC PS3608.O623 (ebook) | LCC PS3608.O623 A45 2018 (print) | DDC 813/.6--dc23
/>
LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2017053852
ISBN 978-1-50117159-8
ISBN 978-1-50117160-4 (ebook)
Colleen Hoover, All Your Perfects
(Series: # )
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