CHAPTER 10
“This hope does not disappoint...” Romans 5:5
Hours later, Blake sat in the waiting room at the hospital. This was the same hospital that Elaine had come to. He found himself terrified. He just kept having visions of Elaine's dead body in her hospital bed with Beth's face superimposed over Elaine's. He had been told that they were just waiting to see if Beth would wake. The sooner she awakens, the better her chances for a good recovery would be.
Blake felt like he was going to explode if he had to sit there one more minute. He got up to go to the men's room, thinking he would splash some water on his face. As he approached the men's room he saw that it was closed for cleaning. He thought, “Who cleans the restrooms at three in the morning?” Then he went in search of another restroom.
He followed the sign out of the ER area and into the main hospital hall. Before he came to a restroom, he came to a glass door labeled, “chapel”. Beyond that door, he could see an area that looked like a tiny church. In spite of the many days that he had spent in this hospital, he had never noticed this chapel area before.
On a whim, he checked the door to see if it was unlocked. The door opened easily and he found himself standing in the chapel. He looked around the room and it was obvious that he was alone. He said, “Anybody home?” and got no response. He felt simultaneously like he was intruding into some place he wasn't supposed to be and that he was really supposed to be there.
His eye was drawn to a big wooden cross at the front of the room. He thought to himself, “This is a good place to pray for Beth. Without taking his eyes off of the cross, he settled into a nearby chair. As he prepared to pray, he glanced down. He saw that the chair in front of his had a flip-down step for kneeling on. This really seemed like a good idea, so he knelt.
Blake prayed, “Oh, Lord God, please. Please help Beth. Lord, I know I'm not really worthy of asking you anything, but she really needs your help right now. I know that you are the awesome, wonderful and powerful God. I know that you are able to heal her and I know that you love her. Oh, Lord, I ask that you reach down from heaven and give her your healing.”
He continued praying, both seeking the Lord for Beth and also enjoying the sensation of the presence of the Lord. In time, he noticed that his prayer had changed. He found himself praying, “I thank you so much for your healing hand. I thank you for the miracle you have done in Beth's life. You are such a good God, I give you praise. Amen.”
Blake opened his eyes and realized that he needed to see Beth and Mark. He got up with the firm knowledge that he and God had spoken together. He was also certain that Beth was going to be OK. As he left the chapel, he made half an attempt to clean the tears off of his face. He hurried back to the ER.
As he walked back into the ER waiting room, the reception clerk called out his name. She told him, “Yes, you can go back to room 17.”
He hurried back and found Beth on the gurney. She smiled when she saw him come in. Blake was so happy to see her conscious. His tears started flowing as he took her hand. From across the bed, Mark said, “It looks like she's going to be fine!”
“I was so worried and now I couldn't be happier. God does answer prayers!” said Blake.
Beth said to Blake, “So, why are you crying?”
“I am just overwhelmed.” said Blake. “I was so afraid that I was going to lose you too, but God heard my prayers. He really heard me, and there you are looking perfectly healthy. How are you feeling?”
Beth answered, “I feel great.”
Mark spoke, “The doctor was just in here and said he didn't understand why she was doing so well, but she appears to be 100%, unlike how she was when she arrived. I told him it was a miracle of God.”
“What did he say to that?” asked Blake.
“He said, 'Maybe it is'”, answered Mark. Turning to Beth, he said, “Do you want to tell him about your vision?”
Beth said, “Well, I don't really know what it was. While I was out, I...well...dreamed?...I don't know. Anyway, I was off in a dark place and I couldn't see to find my way back. It seemed like I was there a really long time. And then, a tunnel opened up in the blackness and I felt prayers being lifted up for me. I felt Jesus' presence in the tunnel and I knew this was the way to go. As I went along, I would catch glimpses of various people praying for me. I saw Mark right here by my bed. I saw Angie in her family room. Becky was praying in her bed. I also saw you,” nodding at Blake, “but this is how I know it was just a dream, because I saw you kneeling in a church, but Mark says you have been right here in the ER. Then, I woke up here, feeling fine.”
Blake felt really odd, he said, “Whoa, that is so weird. I was praying, kneeling in a church-like place. I had wandered...well...been led, to the hospital chapel. I'd say that what you saw is exactly correct.”
There was silence for a moment while they absorbed this. Their thoughts were interrupted by a nurse coming into the room.
The nurse said, “Mrs. Harmon, I just spoke with the doctor, and as he shared with you, he has decided to release you. I will get your final paperwork and it will include a list of symptoms that you should be looking for. It is advised that you have bed rest for the next two days.”
In a softer, less business-like tone she said, “I understand that you told the doctor that this was a miracle of God. I saw the CT scan. Only by God's power could you be feeling fine now. God is still in the business of answering prayers. You have a lot to be thankful for.”
Beth answered, “I do indeed!”
The nurse promised that she would be back in a few minutes with their discharge paperwork.
Even after the incredibly long night, Blake woke early, feeling better than he had in a long time. He still had the warm glow of feeling God's Spirit being present. He decided that today he was going to make a new start in seeking the Lord. He grabbed his Bible and sat down in his easy chair. He looked at the unopened Bible in his hand and then looked around the room. This just didn't feel right.
I occurred to him that, if he was going to do this right, he needed a better place to meet with the Lord. He thought of Elaine's “prayer closet”. Elaine had a chair and tiny little table set up in a corner of their spare bedroom where she would have her “private time with Jesus”.
He went into the spare bedroom. Although he had stared at her special space many times since her death, he hadn't sat in the chair or moved anything. Right now, he wanted to be close to her Jesus. The best way to do that seemed to be to seek Him as she had sought Him. Yet, it still felt somehow wrong to invade this space that had been so special to her.
Her words from the hospital came into his mind, “Jesus says to tell you that He loves you more than you can imagine, and He will be ready to give you comfort in the coming days, all you have to do is let him. Heaven is going to be wonderful. Blake, come and join me there.” With that thought, he sat down in her chair and opened his Bible.
As he sat in the chair he felt an odd sensation. The chair felt warm, as if Elaine had just gotten up a moment before. For the first time in months, Blake felt close to Elaine. He closed his eyes to savor the sensation, whispering, “I love you, my precious Elaine. I miss you so very much.”
After a few moments the sensation faded. Blake opened his eyes and saw the Bible opened on his lap, momentarily forgotten. “How do I do this?” he wondered.
Again, he closed his eyes and spoke, “Lord, my God, I need your help. I want to be faithful. I want to be close to you. I want to know and believe you. I'm just not sure how to proceed.” He paused for a moment, waiting to see if he would hear or feel some sort of a response, then continued, “Lord, I thank you so very much for hearing my prayer and healing Beth last night. It was absolutely incredible. I had been around your miraculous healings before, but I had never been a part of it before. I realize from what Elaine told me that I didn't really do anything, but it was just You allowing me to participate i
n the process, but still I feel so...I don't know...empowered. Thank you for letting me experience that. You are so powerful.
“I don't know why you healed Beth, but didn't heal Elaine, but I'm going to do my level best to take it on faith that you had a good reason. Lord, help me to have a strong faith and to trust you. Lord, please continue to help Beth recover.
“Lord, I want to start seeking you daily, but you know I have tried it before and failed. This time, knowing that I can't succeed in my strength, I submit myself to you and ask that you would help me grow into the person that you want me to be. Even now, I am ready to start reading in your Bible and I don't know where to read. You know that I tried to read the Bible from Genesis once, but that plan didn't last very long. All I know right now is that I want to find you, but I don't know how to go about it. Lord, guide me. Help me to achieve what Elaine had! Help me to have the assurance that I will join her in heaven!”
At this point, Blake ran out of things to pray about, so after a brief pause, said, “Amen”. He looked down at his Bible. It was open to the book of Habakkuk. He didn't think he wanted to start his reading there. It occurred to him that what he did want to understand was the salvation of Jesus. At that moment, he decided that he wanted to read the New Testament.
He flipped pages to the gospel of Matthew and began reading.