After work that same day, Blake called Mark and arranged to meet him at a bakery-restaurant place that was convenient for both of them. When Blake arrived, Mark was standing outside enjoying the warm sun. They went inside and ordered sandwiches. Mark suggested they eat at one of the outdoor tables. As they ate, the caught up on the events in each other's lives.
After a while, there came a pause and Blake asked, “Mark, you know I have been trying hard to grow closer to the Lord. In some respects, I have been doing pretty well, I guess, but I am having some issues with some thoughts. These thoughts aren't really appropriate and they won't go away.”
“My guess is that these thoughts are sexual in nature.” said Mark.
“Well, yes. How did you know?”
Mark said, “We are guys, we are wired that way. Not that this makes it OK or anything, but it is not unusual. Every Christian's mind is a battleground. Just like the way that armies can fight over a piece of land, with one army taking control over it today, then the opposing forces taking control the next, we have a personal Armageddon in our heads. God and Satan each want control of our minds.”
Blake commented, “I can't think a few fantasies are exactly Armageddon.”
“No,” said Mark, “by themselves they aren't. James explains to us how our 'evil desires' entice us, then those same thoughts 'give birth to sin', then that sin 'gives birth to death.'40”
“I still think that is a huge exaggeration of what I am dealing with.”
“Let me ask you this, Blake, do you think that a faithful husband just wakes up one day and says, 'I think I'll have an affair'? Or that a young man decides that he wants to seek a career as a homeless drunk? Would a young girl strive to become a drug addicted prostitute? Of course not! People don't seek to have a life that is ruined by sin, but it happens all the time. It all starts with a thought, usually something small. This thought may seem totally outrageous, but when it runs around and around in a person head, it starts becoming more acceptable and more enticing. Then, that thought becomes an action. It is soon replaced by another thought. This process continues until the person finds themselves in a situation that they would never have dreamed they would be into.”
Blake said, “I knew that the thoughts I was having didn't feel 'right', but I didn't really think they would ever lead into action...well, maybe they could have...I don't know.”
“I understand,” said Mark, “I have been there. What I have learned, the hard way, it is impossible to hold a holy God and sinful thoughts in your mind at the same time. What I did when I was having these thoughts or even the actions associated with them, was to start shutting God out of times and places in my life. Over time, God got shut out of more and more as the sinful side grew. If I had never woken up, I would have eventually abandoned God completely, turning myself fully over to my sin.”
“Ouch! That's awful.” said Blake.
“The second book of Corinthians provides the solution. Paul says, 'We demolish arguments and every high-minded thing that is raised up against the knowledge of God, taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ.''41 Everybody is going to have inappropriate thoughts come into their heads, the question is, what are you going to do with those thoughts? Will we allow them to take up residence, or will we send them packing? I bet there are already many thoughts that come into your head that you just don't entertain.”
Mark continued, “Let me give you an example. Today I was trying to get a sandwich at a deli and the clerk at the counter was insisting on giving me too much change. I tried and tried to do the right thing and explain that I had given him a $10 dollar bill and not a $20, but them he started to get angry with me, like I was trying to cheat them. The thought came into my mind to grab him and shove the $10 bill in his mouth, but I didn't entertain that thought for even a moment.”
“So what happened with the $10?” asked Blake.
“I wound up with it,” said Mark. “Unless I come across a needy person that needs it, I'll just toss it in the offering plate at church. You know what's odd about this story, is the deli had a tip jar sitting there and I could have put the money in there, but I just couldn't bring myself to reward the young man for not doing his job well. His register will come up short and maybe that will be a learning experience for him.”
“But, anyway,” Mark went on, “this thought of violence was really no different than any other thought that comes into our minds, except that I didn't entertain it. When it showed up, I knew it was wrong and I just didn't go there. Some of these wrong thoughts are more appealing than others and consequently harder to get rid of. Look at it this way, if you were cleaning up at the church and you came across a copy of Playboy in the sanctuary, then you would throw that away immediately. It obviously has no place in the church. Well, the Bible says that we are to be the sanctuary for God42, so what is inappropriate for the church sanctuary is inappropriate for us.”
Blake was unconvinced and asked, “Realistically, how does that work out in your life?”
“In general,” Mark answered, “I do pretty well these days, but there was a time when my mind was a sewer. I know all about how letting sinful thoughts into your mind can gradually push God out of your life. I came to realize that where my mind goes, the rest of me will follow. When I spend my time thinking about the things of the world, then my faith gets undermined. It was a subtle process, that I didn't even notice, but then one day I looked up and realized that my walk with God was a joke.”
He went on, “Now I know that I have to keep careful control over what goes on in my head. Temptation is not just actions. Remember how Jesus said that looking at a woman with lust is the same as committing adultery with her43? What goes on in your thoughts is spiritually important.”
Blake asked, “So what do you do when some crazy thought shows up?”
“I don't know, I guess I do different things different times because the tempting thoughts come in different flavors. Sometimes I can just push it out by my own will. There are other cases when I just start to give the Lord praise, because praise and sinful thoughts can't be in the mind at the same time. There are other times when I know I am in over my head when I will pray and call on the Lord to shield me from the thought. I know that it is God's will that I be pure and righteous, so I can confidently ask Him to help that happen. Although I don't believe a person is ever totally free of these nuisances as long as they are on this side of heaven, but it does get easier with practice.”
Blake said, “I guess I expected you to say something like that, but in a way I had hoped you would say, 'thoughts don't make any difference, don't worry about them!'”
Mark laughed, “Sorry, buddy. If I can help you avoid some of the mistakes I have made, then that would make me very happy. So how do you feel about your spiritual position?”
“Gee, I don't know...” said Blake as his cell phone started ringing. He glanced at the caller ID and saw that it was Nikki. He thought this was odd since he usually called her. He said to Mark, “Excuse me a sec, it's Nikki.”
Speaking into the phone, Blake said, “Hi, Nikki”
Nikki said, “Hey Blake, how are you doing? Did I catch you at a bad time?”
“I am doing great, I was just having after-dinner cup of coffee with Mark.”
“The same Mark that brought you to my house?” said Nikki.
“The very one.”
Nikki said, “Well, tell Mark that I said 'Hello'. I won't keep you, but I wanted to pass on an invitation. The situation with my sister and her baby is getting more and more critical. I wanted to have a few people gather at my house tomorrow evening for some serious prayer intervention. Would you be available tomorrow evening for a couple of hours?”
Blake was surprised and said, “Are you sure you want me there? I'm not exactly the mature prayer warrior.”
She laughed as she said, “I was told to have you there. If you have any questions, you can direct them upward.
”
Blake was startled again, “Oh. Then, I guess I better be there. What time? Do I need to bring anything?”
“Be here at seven and just bring a servant's heart.” she said.
“OK, I'll be there.”
“I'm glad. See you tomorrow. Bye-Bye.”
With that, the connection ended. Blake was a bit dazed by the whole thing. He told Mark, “She said to tell you 'Hello'. She was calling to invite me to some sort of a prayer intervention. I think I told you about how her sister was doing drugs and it made a really bad environment for Nikki's neice. Social services had been called by somebody in the family and it was creating a huge rift. But through it all, the sister is in total denial that there is any problem. Apparently the whole thing is coming to a head, and Nikki wants to bring out the big prayer guns. Perhaps she was hallucinating, but she is convinced that I am supposed to be there. I really can't imagine that I could be of any use.”
Mark said, “God doesn't operate the way we expect. Furthermore, while we look at ourselves and see our shortcomings, He looks at us and sees our potential. If God wants you there, then you shouldn't miss it for the world.”
“I suppose you are right.” Blake said. “Well, maybe we should call it a night...”
“Oh, no you don't.” said Mark. “Just before Nikki's well-timed call, you were going to tell me about your walk with the Lord.”
“I guess I was.” Blake said sheepishly, “In many ways, the Lord is becoming more real to me, but I don't feel like I have the faith I should. It is like I am just going through the motions sometimes, as if the Lord was there, but I can't really tell He is there or not.”
Mark said, “That is almost a definition of faith. The book of Hebrews says, 'Faith is the reality of what is hoped for, the proof of what is not seen44. Going on as if He is there when He isn't being obvious really requires exercising more faith than working where you see His hand and feel His Spirit.”
“I guess I know that,” said Blake, “but it feels like I'm not doing something right when I can't feel His presence or see any answers to my prayers.”
Mark said, “There will be times like that, you just can't let that discourage you. Keep looking for His hand. Keep praising and thanking Him. So, how are things at work, are you able to walk with the Lord there?”
“That's sometimes hard, because my work is complicated and requires all my concentration. I do a little prayer before an important meeting sometimes...well, now that I think about it, I guess I mostly leave the Lord at home when I go to work.”
Mark replied, “That is easy to do. You know that God can help you a lot at work? There was a time when I got in my head that God couldn't help with technical matters, then it dawned on me that every bit of technology is His. There isn't anything that He can't do, because He is God. But, more than that, He wants to be God over your entire life, without exception.”
“I hear what you say,” Blake said, “but my work is so high-paced. It’s not like I can just stop and take a few minutes to pray when things get intense.”
“Prayer doesn't always have to be like that. Do you know the story of Nehemiah?”
“I'm not sure, I get a lot of those guys mixed up.” said Blake.
“His big story is that God had him rebuild Jerusalem out of ruins, but one of the most interesting things happens very early in the story. He is working as the cupbearer to the king. The king asked him an important question and right there in between question and answer, Nehemiah prayed to God. Prayer doesn't always have to be eyes-closed, cloistered away in your private place, often we just shoot the Lord an arrow-prayer right in the middle of the action. If we are going to walk with the Lord, we can't just be with Him from time-to-time, we need to walk with Him all the time.”
Blake responded, “I know that Elaine used to talk about praying while driving or praying while giving a presentation at work, but I never really understood. I guess where I came from, unless your prayer was...well...more formalized 'prayer time' then it wasn't prayer. On the other hand, a lot of the ideas I had about prayer have been garbage.”
“Prayer is just spending time with God.” said Mark. “It is making that connection between you and your God intentional. It is pushing open that door that faces God so He can touch you, help you or guide you. That door tends to swing shut unless we keep opening it. That can be done in a fraction of a second when there are other things going on. Right in the middle of the action, we can reach out and touch Almighty God and know that He is with us. That can be huge when the going gets tough.”
“That's an interesting image.” said Blake.
Mark continued, “As for praying while driving, it is a lot like having a conversation with a passenger, you sure don't close your eyes, nor does the prayer have your total concentration. But, it can be a wonderful time with the Lord anyway. I remember it taking a little getting used to, when I first started praying while driving, but now I consider it to be a valuable time with the Lord. I did notice people looking at me like I was crazy, because I was talking in my car with nobody else in there. But if you are worried about that, then all you have to do is wear a bluetooth and everybody thinks you are talking on the phone.”
Mark and Blake laughed together.
CHAPTER 14
“Don't be afraid. Only believe.” Mark 5:36