Emotion poured into him as if a dam had broken, shaking him, flooding his system with unexpected and unwanted . . . what? Not love. It couldn't be love. The thought, the feeling, terrified him, but he couldn't deny touching her, kissing her, feeling her body melting into his was unlike anything he'd ever come close to experiencing when he'd thought he'd known passion and great sex. Something about Emma brought out every male instinct he had--even tenderness--when he'd never known it for himself. He hadn't expected the waves of feeling that came rushing over him, the joy bursting through him, sweeping him up with every bit of the intensity and adding to the strength of his physical need of her.
The jackhammers drilling into his head increased their tempo while his leopard leapt and roared for supremacy. She gasped for breath, going boneless under the onslaught of his hands and mouth. His knee slid between her legs, grinding into her, the junction like a furnace, inciting him all the more. He dragged her thin top down, exposing her breasts, his mouth never leaving hers, still feeding ferociously while his hands found bare flesh.
He jerked at her bra, desperate to feel the soft, creamy mounds spilling into his palms. The feel of the soft weight in his bare hands nearly made him weep. He wanted to know every single inch of her, needed to find a way to slow down to savor the taste of her. His mouth left hers and he blazed a trail of fire down her throat to her breast.
Emma gasped and arched to him as he took her in his mouth, suckling strongly, his tongue flicking the hard peak, his teeth biting down, sending shock waves through her body.
Emma heard her own keening wail and knew she was in terrible trouble. The chemistry between them was explosive, her skin so sensitive she could barely stand the touch of her clothing. She couldn't stop herself from rubbing back and forth against his knee. Her mouth felt empty, just as her body did. She wanted him to fill her up, to relieve the terrible ache that was building and building until she needed to scream and plead for him to be inside her. This was Jake, the man she loved desperately, and she wanted him with every cell in her body.
He lifted her with one strong arm. "Wrap your legs around me." He needed to be closer, needed to be inside of her, sharing the same skin.
Emma did as he asked, opening herself to him. A strange purring sound came from her as he rocked against her, and she rubbed her body hard against his thick bulge. The thin material between them frustrated her and she glanced down. She could see herself, her full breasts spilling out, her body flushed and needy, her hips bucking against him while her legs wrapped around him tightly. She'd lost her mind. She was attacking him.
"Stop." It came out a whisper, a hoarse, needy whisper, her breath coming in ragged gasps. "We have to stop."
"We have to get our clothes off," he countered, his mouth greedy at her breast.
Her body nearly convulsed with pleasure. She was building to an orgasm, something she'd rarely had with Andrew, yet Jake hadn't even penetrated her. "Jake, please." She didn't know if she was begging him to take her right there in the hallway or if she was looking for freedom. She'd never in her life felt so desperate to have a man inside of her.
She felt his hands tugging at the drawstring of her pants while his mouth continued to suckle at her breast. His teeth tugged and nipped while his tongue flicked back and forth. She felt each touch deep in her womb, so that her inner muscles gripped at nothing. She was empty and needy, aching for him. She needed to push him away but she couldn't find the strength. "I wouldn't be able to live with myself," she whispered. "Or with you."
He went utterly still. He even seemed to stop breathing for a moment, and she knew he was struggling for control. He held her tight against him, so tight she could feel his heavy shaft pulsing against her mound. His mouth reluctantly left her aching breast and he buried his face between her neck and shoulder. They stayed that way a long time, neither moving, fighting for breath, for a way to pull back, for a way to defuse what had just happened between them.
Jake moved first, slowly lowering her legs back to the floor, his hands framing her face. "I'm sorry, Emma. There's no excuse and I'm not going to try to find one for you."
She couldn't blame the entire thing on him; she'd more than responded. She didn't know what had come over her. She stood there, the wall holding her up, looking at his face, her breasts spilling out of her bra, wild and wanton, with the strawberry marks from his teeth and mouth all over them. She couldn't find her voice, or her will.
Jake pulled her top up, but the material rubbed against her hard nipples, sending streaks of arousal lashing from her breasts to her spasming womb. "I'm sorry too," was all she could manage.
"I need to know what Linda said to you," Jake said, "whether you want to tell me or not. It's important, Emma. It isn't just about my ego and my being a control freak. I know you think I'm paranoid about you and the children, but I have good reason."
The last thing she wanted to do was talk and make sense. She needed to take a cold shower and then hide her head under the blankets for the rest of her life. Jake seemed to be able to switch off intense arousal with little problem. His body was still hard, but she rarely saw him any other way. He still was close to her, nearly skin to skin, the heat of his body warming her and his masculine scent enveloping her. She didn't push him away because her legs were so weak she was afraid she'd fall if he stepped back.
She fought to control her breathing and tried to make sense, tried to be as nonchalant as he managed. "Linda said she needed to talk to me, that it was important. Although she never said it outright, she implied she had a message for me from you."
He frowned down at her, shaking his head as if disappointed in her. "I would have called you myself if that were the case."
"I know that. I do. I don't know what I was thinking." Which wasn't entirely true. She'd been curious to see what Jake's "girlfriend" looked like. Emma had an acute sense of smell, and all too often she scented another woman when Jake came through the door in the evening after he'd been to his downtown office. Curiosity and maybe a little jealousy had gotten the best of her and she told Jerico to have Linda escorted up to the house.
"What did Linda have to say?"
Emma tried to keep color from spreading up her neck and into her face. Linda had said a lot of things, most of which had been downright insulting. It had only taken a minute in Linda's company to realize that the message she'd come to deliver wasn't from Jake but from Linda herself. The gist of it was: Emma would never have Jake because Linda had staked her claim. Kyle had unfortunately heard Linda screaming at her that no matter how many illegitimate bastard children she had with Jake, he would never stoop to marrying someone so far beneath him.
"Emma." Jake said her name in warning.
Emma tilted her chin at him. "She was insulting. I handled it. It was unfortunate that Kyle overheard her yelling at me. He's never really heard yelling before, so I think it was disturbing and he remembered it. Don't worry, Jake. I learned my lesson. It was quite uncomfortable, and Kyle was upset afterward. I rocked him to sleep for a couple of nights before he got over it."
"You cried." His throat closed unexpectedly. He hadn't been there to comfort her when she went to sleep.
"A little. I'm not used to people yelling at me or being insulting either. She said some pretty ugly things, but I realized she thinks we're living together. Obviously she believes you're Andraya's father . . ."
"I am Andraya's father," he said in a low tone.
"Of course. I meant birth father. She feels threatened by that, and evidently so do your parents."
Every muscle in his body contracted. His head came up, eyes glittering dangerously, and he had to suppress the rumbling growl rising in his chest. "How did they get into the conversation?" He had never been able to acknowledge them as his parents, let alone refer to them as his mother and father. To him, they would always be his enemies.
Emma shrugged. "Linda is apparently good friends with them and they don't want to see you brought down by a nobody like me. They
want to make certain I know that my children will never be welcome into their circle. As I wasn't planning on joining any circles, I wasn't too upset by it."
She was lying. Jake could always smell a lie. The things Linda had said had hurt. No one wanted to be told they weren't good enough to be part of a family. Jake cupped the nape of her neck, his thumb sliding along her soft skin. "You aren't anything like those people, Emma. You're so far above them you can't even imagine. They're all cruel and vicious. I don't want you anywhere near them, unless I'm standing right beside you. And I don't want the children exposed to them--ever."
"I can take care of myself."
"They would eat you alive. You have no idea what they're capable of and I don't want you ever to find out. I protect you all for a reason. I employ bodyguards for a reason. No one comes onto the property without my permission."
"I understand, Jake. I really do, and I'm sorry. I should have protected the children better. It never occurred to me that Linda Rawlins would be involved in anything that could harm either of them. I don't know her, but I've read about her in newspapers and magazines numerous times. She seemed a little haughty maybe, and frivolous, running from one party to another, but I honestly never thought of her as dangerous."
"Anyone who runs in the same crowd, anyone connected at all to the people who gave birth to me, is extremely dangerous. Given the chance, they would harm either of the children, and certainly you."
"I understand. It won't happen again. I'm sorry it happened this time. I really am."
Jake bent his head and brushed his mouth across her temple. "I should have made the situation much clearer to you. Joshua should have stayed in that room with you every moment and Jerico should never have allowed her onto the property in the first place."
"Wait." Emma caught at his arm as he turned away. "I told Jerico to send her up and Joshua was protecting the children. You told me I ran this household when you were away. If either of them gets in trouble for doing what I asked, I'll have no authority at all. It's my fault, not theirs."
He kept his expression blank. Yes, the men were to do what she said, unless it involved her safety. Joshua acted as Emma's bodyguard, not the children's, although she had no idea. Drake looked after the children. Both men should have been present. He had a lot to say to both Jerico and Joshua, whether Emma liked it or not. But she had that anxious look that made him want to kiss her until the look disappeared.
"Don't worry. I won't do anything to undermine your authority." He was just going to make it very plain that if anyone ever got through security again, he was going to beat both of them within an inch of their lives. And he would make them very aware that Emma was to be protected at all times. He forced a smile. "I won't be home for dinner. I have an important meeting tonight. A few investors are very interested in acquiring one of my companies. The company hasn't made any money, and they're offering way more money than the company is worth, so they have something up their sleeves. I need to meet with them face-to-face to figure out what it is. Don't expect me until late." He also suspected that the company manager was on his enemies' payroll, and he intended to find out for certain.
Emma nodded. She had planned to call Greg Patterson and cancel her date with him, but after what had happened between her and Jake, she wanted to see if she reacted to Greg. If she did, then her problem was simply that she'd gone too long without a man. Let that be it.
Jake turned back to her, a slight frown on his face. "What did you say?"
She blinked in surprise. "I didn't say anything."
He stood there in the hall, tall, as sexy as sin, remote, his golden eyes drifting over her body with a little too much possession in his gaze, until Emma pressed herself back against the wall to keep from sliding down it. His stare came back up to her face, to her mouth, and his hand moved to the front of his jeans, his palm sliding over the hard bulge.
"Sometimes you make me wish I was a decent man, Emma."
Emma's breath caught in her throat as he turned away from her, an oath slipping out from between his clenched teeth as he strode away. She held on to the wall, trembling, shocked at the way she reacted to him, to his crudeness and his blatant sensuality, when she'd always been attracted to gentle, kind souls. There was little gentle or kind about Jake.
She retreated to her room to pull herself back together before facing Susan and the children. She could hear them in the distance, laughing, and the sound allowed her to breathe again. She just needed to go back to what she did best. The children were her first priority. She loved them and she provided a home for them.
Jake needed someone, whether he knew it or not. Not sexually--not in the usual way he related to women--but on a more emotional, intimate level. He needed someone to make a difference in his life and make his house a home. Emma had been happy in her role as his housekeeper, but she had to begin slowly separating herself from the close and very strange relationship she'd formed with him over the past two years.
In her room, Emma pulled a thick sweater over her thin T-shirt and tried to put Jake out of her mind. Tonight she was going on a date with Greg Patterson, a nice, uncomplicated man, and she intended to enjoy herself. She needed to get out and breathe. She'd allowed the ranch to consume her and she had to think about making a life for herself outside of it.
For now, however, she was going to be the mommy and make certain her children and her houseguest were happy.
She hurried down the wide, curving staircase and paused halfway down to look at the bronze statue of a crouched leopard. It was snarling, lips drawn back to expose sharp teeth, eyes fierce with ropes of muscle rippling beneath the rosette-dotted fur. The bronze leopard stood in the midst of several plants and appeared lifelike, a fierce wild predator, still and focused, hunting prey and all too reminiscent of Jake when he looked at her.
Her head went up when she heard Andraya shriek and Kyle laugh. Susan shouted something and Andraya and Kyle let out another round of high-pitched glee. She ran to the kitchen, only to stop in the doorway and see cake all over the floor and the table. Kyle and Andraya sat in their high chairs covered in frosting, and what remained of the birthday cake was a mass of crumbs and frosting between them. She could see the marks of fingers in the cake where the children had scooped out handfuls and eaten them, thrown them and dumped them on their heads.
"Susan?" she asked, raising an eyebrow at the teenager.
Susan opened and closed her mouth several times. "They said you fed them cake for breakfast. I have no idea how to cook, or what babies eat."
Kyle glared at her. "I'm not a baby. 'Draya is."
"Kyle, don't talk like that to Susan," Emma said gently. She removed what was left of the cake from the table and tugged Susan over to the sink. "Children are not fed cake for breakfast."
"They both threw it at me and then at each other." Emma fixed a stern eye on the children. "They both will have a time-out and then apologize," she said.
Andraya's lower lip came out in a pout, but Emma ignored her while she removed as much cake as possible from Susan's hair and clothes. "I think you'd better go take a shower while I clean up the little munchkins."
"I want to hear all about Jake," Susan protested. "What did he say about me staying here for a couple of weeks? Do you think he likes my hair?" She patted the sophisticated weave she'd gotten just before coming to stay at the Bannaconni estate.
"Jake doesn't comment on appearances as a rule," Emma said, trying to let Susan down easy. The teen had a major crush on the man, and it wasn't as if Emma could blame her. She turned to Kyle and began cleaning him up. He was going to need a bath to get his hair clean, but judging from the bright eyes, huge dimples and baby grin stretching from ear to ear, he looked as if he'd thoroughly enjoyed the morning.
Susan raced upstairs to shower while Emma cleaned the kitchen and children and then took them upstairs for a bath. By the time she was back down with them, Jake was pacing in the kitchen again like a caged cat, and Susan looked pale and
wide-eyed, as if she might faint--or cry--any moment.
The children ran to Jake, who bent immediately to pick them up. "Susan made the coffee," he announced grimly.
Emma turned her back, hiding a smile. Susan's hero had feet of clay. He was a coffee drinker and he tended to be grumpy in the morning without it. Most of the men who worked close to the house were in the habit of dropping in to fill their travel mugs with coffee as well.
"I'm on it," she said, biting down hard on her amusement. Susan sniffed and Emma put her arm around the girl. "Would you take the kids to the play yard? I think Evan's here this morning to watch over them. He can help you."
Susan perked up immediately. Evan was fairly young, looked like a "hot" cowboy in his jeans and boots and hat, and didn't mind flirting with her even though she was a teenager. Although he rarely spoke, he gave off the impression of being the strong, silent type, which made him mysterious to Susan. "Of course, Emma," she agreed, to show Jake she wasn't as useless as he thought she was.
"Speak French to them. Only French," Emma added deliberately, shooting Jake a clear reprimand over her shoulder. "Today is French day."
Susan stuck her chin in the air as she reached for the two children, giving Jake her haughtiest look.
When Andraya protested, holding on to Jake's neck tightly, he gently pried her loose, speaking in fluent French, telling her to go with Susan and play. Andraya sulked, but she always minded Jake and she went outside where Evan waited to escort them to the play yard.
"That girl can't even make coffee," Jake said.
"That girl has a name. It's Susan. She has a housekeeper, three maids, a cook and no mother, Jake. Her governess, that horrible Dana Anderson woman, couldn't care less about her and belittles her at every opportunity. Susan speaks three languages and happens to be studying at college level already. And you can't make coffee either."
Jake came up behind her, bending over her shoulder as she ground the fresh coffee beans. "What makes you think I can't make coffee?"
"Because without coffee you're a total grump and if you're up before me, you still don't make it."