Chapter 4
It is December third, that means today is my birth day and of course none of my friends remember. I don’t expect much from them I have only known them for about three years. I always laugh because it is always about them and if I ever mention a problem about me they always say gosh is everything about you crystal. I know what your thinking what kind of friends are those.
But the thing is when I first moved to Montana I was desperate to not sit alone at a table. So yes you are about to most likely ridicule me for picking the mean girls club, maybe they should me classified as the bad girls club. I know you are chopping at the bit to find out who these mongrels are. The head of the group is Angie she comes from a rich family and she is like the princess of the school so she thinks she is all that. I always ask why she lives in Montana is she is like rich. Well the next girls is Amanda she is as dumb as they come she can not even tell when you are insulting her, and the only reason she is friends with Angie is because she is pretty I guess. Then there is Ruby I always laugh when I say her name because her mother had to be high or drunk when she thought of that name. well I guess I am not much better considering I am named Crystal sometimes people at school call me Crystal meth for fun. Anyways back to Ruby she is really so far up Angie’s butt that sometimes I think I see Ruby’s face when head when Angie talks, you know I really do not know why they are friends. The only reason they like me is they feel bad for me and I help do most of their homework. So you can basically see why they really do not care to remember the poor, sad, ugly, fat girl’s birthday. I guess it doesn’t matter any way it’s just my fifteenth birthday. To my amazement my brother put my name on the announcements because it was my birthday. I really am so glad I have a brother like Grant. I honestly do not know where I would be with out my brother I don’t think I could ever, survive my parents and the kids at my school without my brother. Once my so called friends found out that today was my birthday they decided to throw a party for me this weekend at Angie’s house. Let me tell you this I am not excited for this what so ever.
Its Saturday night and it is time to go to the party, don’t worry this is not going to me some cliché were I sneak out of the house, get really drunk, and end up doing some things that I wish I would not have. See the thing is my parents are out drinking some were, and my brother is not coming to watch me or spy on me I hope. I finally arrive to the party and it is out of control not in a good way either. I am not a fan of really drunk people, actually I am really sensitive to it. Angie comes up to me and says this is your party and you are going to love it and enjoy it. She starts pointing out a lot of cute popular guys and she starts telling me that secretly they want me. I laugh and go with it. But by the second hour I get so uninterested and end up leaving. Then Angie calls me and start yelling at me for leaving clearly she is hammered.
“Hey were the heck did you go.”
“Um I left because I don’t feel very well.”
“You suck at lying and you know it.”
“Look I am really sorry I do not like to be around people that drink ok.”
“Whatever ok you better not do that again ok I don’t car if you like people that drink or not alright.”
“Alright ok I will not do that again.”
“Well whatever next time you leave when I tell you to.”
“Alright bye.”
“Bye Crystal I love you.”
“Ok?’
Things have been really weird since the party. My parents had to apologize because they forgot my birthday. They also did not manage to by a gift or at least a card with is just really sad at least I think so. Hen Angie has been spending a lot of time with me and she wants to get friendlier with me what ever that means. But at least Christmas break will be coming soon and I will not have to hang out with my really strange friends, I can just stay home and work on my poem and try to improve it. I am just really glad that I can control myself when it comes to interesting behavior with other people.
Today my mother and I are decorating the house for Christmas and we are going to bake chex mix and ginger bread cookies. I am so excited I really love spending time with my mother it really is good for me. Sometimes I just feel so left out when I am around my mother. I feel like she does not want to be seen with me. But I guess it really is true when they say the holidays bring family together. I love my mom so much and I wish she could see that. And I wish she would see how much this really means to me. My mother has always loved Christmas time. She loves it so much that she forgets about November being dedicated to thanksgiving time she thinks Christmas is so important that it gets two months and I agree with her I love Christmas so much I really enjoy it. My mother has always been a little happier when Christmas time rolls around. She gets the music out she buys a tree and she puts lights up and helps me decorate my fake tree in my bedroom. She always has Christmas music playing in the car. Oh and I love when she has the cinnamon candles in the house. I feel so much safer when Christmas time is around because that means my mother is around.
My parents are not home and it is five in the morning and my parents like I said are no where to be found. So I call my dad and turns out he is at a bar still trying to clean his friends bar oh and my dad is also drunk out of his mind. I call him and yell so loud that I wake Grant up. And he was not a happy camper. I started yelling at my dad so much that I got a head ache.
“Dad you better be home in time to take me to school and you better be sober.”
“Wow Crystal”
Then I hung up on my dad I was just so upset, angry, and frustrated. My parents only ever care about them selves. You know it really breaks my heart.
It is Six o’clock this is usually when I wake up to get ready for school. But my mom comes in my room and tells me I do not have to go to school if I don’t want to but I tell her I want to so I do not have to stay home with her and my idiot dad. But she goes and tells grant that he does not have to go so he doesn’t. so I continue my morning like any normal morning. The only thing I did differently was I did not wake Grant up to get ready for school. I am finally ready so I go to wake my mom up but she is so, so, so drunk that I can not get her up and out of bed. So I wake my dad up and he yells at me for disrupting his sleep. We get outside and he starts asking me were grant is.
“Um dad mom said he did not have to go to school if he did not want to”
“Oh well I am so freaking glad your mother thinks she can make all the decisions in the house.
“I am really sorry dad.”
“No you’re not Crystal you just don’t understand.”
“I am so tired of you thinking that you and your mother can make all the decisions.”
“Dad please stop.”
“Stop what Crystal, stop what.”
“Doing that attacking me with your words and getting under my skin.”
“Crystal you always think someone is out to you, you think you have it so hard you know what my parents were never there for me”
“Well dad I know how it feels”
“Oh that is a bunch of bull you don’t have it as hard as I did.”
“Why is it always a contest with you, it is like you want me to feel the pain you felt as a kid”
“You know what I am still mad that you did not wake Grant up for school”
“Look dad I am actually sorry and its not like it is going to ruin Grant for the rest of his life”
“You know you brother does not do well in school ok so you know what this is my decision not yours”
“Dad you have never cared about Grant‘s school work why do you care now”
“Crystal you know that is not true”
“Come on dad you didn’t even know what grade we were in”
“I am sorry you now I am not good at that kind of stuff”
“What you aren’t good at caring”
“That is not true”
“Bye dad I have to get out of the care I don’t want to be late.”
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That was the end of our conversation and I just wanted to cry and never stop, I hate when my father and I argue with each other it just breaks my heat into a million little bits.
I hate when Grant doesn’t come to school with me I just don’t feel safe. I mean so of these kids are just plane evil! I am walking down the hall and some stupid idiot girls come up to me ask me were my body guard is and in case you really don’t know who they are referring to they are referring to Grant. I really miss Grant these hours of school really drug on and on. By the time lunch hit I ran into the bathroom and hid in a stall and silently cried for the whole lunch period. My favorite part was when my so called friends walked in the bathroom. Then I hear Angie’s voice and she starts talking crap about me to the others.
“I’m so tired of Crystal she is so fat and ugly I am really tired of her being part of our group”
“You are so right Angie Crystal is poor to she is really bad for our reputation”
“You are so right Amanda Crystal is also way to smart for our group.”
“No stupid we have to keep that ugly weird thing so she can do our homework.”
“That makes more sense Angie.” Ruby says.
I burst out of the bathroom stall and start screaming at them.
“You are such hypocrites you are the ugly fat poor ones and you better not talk to me ever ageing and by the way do not ask me for any help on your homework who nasty, ugly, freaks”.
Gosh that felt good to yell and slam the door in there faces.