CHAPTER 4
June was worried again; Soony could always tell.
‘It’s been seven weeks,’ she said on the phone to Miss Janes, ‘since she last had a period. And she does seem to be putting on weight.’
Soony didn’t like it when June was worried. She went upstairs and used a Tampax. She flushed the cardboard tube down the loo but left the wrapper on the edge of the bath.
June found her in the garden, hot and flushed in the two o’clock sun. ‘You need a sunhat, Soony,’ she said. ‘There’s one in the shed you can wear.’ But Soony wouldn’t touch it. ‘It’s too pink,’ she said.
‘It’s blue!’
‘It’s too blue.’
‘There’s a yellow one upstairs,’ said June. ‘Will you wear that if I fetch it for you?’
‘Oh, all right then,’ Soony said.
June came downstairs again. ‘Soony,’ she said, ‘has your period come?’ She looked relieved.
Soony beamed. ‘Yes.’
‘Oh good,’ said June. ‘Good.’
Soony was pleased to see June happy. She began to sing.
‘It’s nice to hear you humming,’ said June.
Soony looked down at her knickers, ‘I’m not,’ she said. ‘I haven’t got time for humming.’
‘Ah,’ said June.
‘I’m too busy,’ Soony explained, ‘with Popcorn.’
‘Ah,’ said June, and laughed.
Soony was glad to hear her laughing. ‘We’ll go shopping if you like,’ she offered, standing up. ‘You can buy me a sunhat. A pink one.’
‘Popcorn is still around,’ June told Jim when he came home from work.
‘Of course she’s around,’ said Soony, overhearing. ‘She’s in my room.’
‘Don’t you think,’ said Jim, ‘that she might get lonely up there? Would she like to visit Springfields again? Or one of your friends could come and see you here.’
Soony looked blank.
‘Why don’t you ask Popcorn,’ June said, ‘if she’s feeling lonely at all?’
‘She’s not lonely,’ said Soony. ‘She’s got me.’
‘But she might like somebody else to talk to from time to time,’ suggested Jim.
‘She doesn’t talk!’ said Soony.
‘Is she dumb?’ asked Jim.
‘She’s not dumb!’ said Soony. ‘She just doesn’t talk!’
‘But she sings,’ June told Jim. ‘She sings beautifully, doesn’t she, Soony?’
‘Oh, yes,’ said Soony dreamily. ‘Yes.’
‘Oh, good,’ said Jim crossly. ‘What does she sing? “Me And My Shadow”?’
‘Jim,’ said June.
Soony sighed. ‘She doesn’t sing words,’ she said patiently. ‘She doesn’t talk.’
‘Soony,’ said June, meeting her on the landing. ‘You are remembering to change your Tampax, are you?’
‘Oh, no,’ said Soony. ‘I forgot.’ She went into the bathroom, pulled one out of its wrapper and used it. She left the wrapper on the edge of the bath.
At bedtime, June saw her going into the bathroom. ‘Tampax,’ she reminded her.
‘Oh, yes,’ Soony said. She removed the old one and flushed it away then unwrapped a new one, as white and clean as the last. It hardly seemed worth the effort, she thought, to go through the process all over again. She pulled the tampon out of its tube and flushed both parts down the toilet. She left the wrapper on the edge of the bath.
‘You shouldn’t encourage her,’ said Jim when they were in bed.
‘What d’you mean?’
‘This Popcorn business. You talk about her as if she was real.’
‘She is, to Soony.’
‘That’s what I mean. She’s retreating from reality.’
‘Reality isn’t always kind to her,’ said June. ‘You should see the way people look at her in the street. As if she was some kind of disease.’
‘OK,’ Jim agreed. ‘But it’s not going to help her, to live in a fantasy world.’
‘Why not, if it makes her happy?’
‘Because’, said Jim patiently, ‘we’re trying to get her to be as normal as possible, aren’t we?’
‘Are we?’ said June. ‘Why – what’s so good about normal?’
‘Goodnight,’ said Jim. ‘You’re being ridiculous.’
‘Four months,’ said Miss Janes. ‘It’s really worked out remarkably well.’
‘Don’t count your chickens,’ cautioned Mr Fisher. ‘You often find that everyone’s on “best behaviour” to begin with. Then the novelty wears off.’
‘Yes, well, June did find she was getting tired. But Soony’s weekend at Springfields went well; we could do that again if the need arose.’
‘Any worries, on the part of the foster parents?’
‘Not really, no; they seem to be genuinely fond of her. June was worried at one stage that Soony might be pregnant, but it turned out to be unfounded.’
‘Pregnant?’ Mr Fisher looked over his spectacles. ‘Is she on the pill?’
‘No. She’s only sixteen this week and there’s been no sign of any sexual activity. Except self-administered, of course.’
‘Even so,’ said Mr Fisher. ‘You can’t be too careful, you know. It only needs to happen once.’
‘She’s very carefully looked after,’ Miss Janes protested. ‘She doesn’t go out on her own. And I thought you believed in minimum interference?’
‘I do,’ said Mr Fisher. ‘But if you ended up with a learning-disabled teenage girl who got pregnant then that would create a need for maximum interference, wouldn’t it? I think you should have a word with the foster parents. Suggest they talk to the family doctor about giving her the pill.’
‘Oh, all right then,’ said Miss Janes.
Soony was sitting in the garden.
‘It’s cold,’ said June. ‘Are you warm enough?’
Soony didn’t answer. She had a rapt expression on her face. Her eyes were closed.
‘Soony,’ June whispered. ‘Is Popcorn singing?’
Soony opened her eyes. ‘Yes,’ she said.
‘Is it good?’
‘She’s wonderful,’ said Soony fervently. She pointed to the blackbird on the TV aerial on the roof. ‘As wonderful as that. Wonderfuller.’
‘She sings a lot these days,’ said June.
‘Yes,’ said Soony reverently. ‘She goes on and on and on.’ She closed her eyes again.
Miss Janes came round to the back gate when June didn’t answer the doorbell. ‘Hello!’ she called.
June hurried down to meet her.
‘I thought I’d call in...’ said Miss Janes.
‘Ssh!’ whispered June. ‘Come inside. Soony is listening to Popcorn sing.’
Miss Janes looked at her. They tiptoed indoors.
‘Where’s Soony?’ asked Jim. ‘No reception committee today?’
‘She’s listening ... She’s in the garden,’ June said. ‘Don’t go out for a minute. Miss Janes came today. She thinks we should have Soony put on the pill.’
‘Whatever for?’
‘Just in case of accidents. You never know. It would only need to happen once.’
‘Oh, come on! She isn’t even interested in boys. No normal boy would look at her anyway, and when does she meet any of her own kind?’
‘At Springfields?’
‘She’s been there for one weekend so far. And I’m sure they’re carefully supervised.’
‘You can’t be certain, Jim. It would be terrible if anything happened, wouldn’t it? It’s a big responsibility. I’ve already had a couple of scares with her...’
‘Both times false alarms,’ Jim pointed out. ‘No, really darling, I see your point but it’s a very small risk. Not worth messing her about for.’
‘A small risk, but if it happened...’
‘Well – how about if we only let her go to Springfields when her period’s on? That would be safe enough, wouldn’t it?’
‘Mm,’ said June, unconvinced. ‘Not necessarily. And
it doesn’t seem to happen that often, anyway. She’s very irregular.’
‘There you are,’ said Jim. ‘She’s probably infertile. That book said girls with her condition often are.’
‘Thanks a lot,’ said June bitterly. ‘That makes two of us.’
Jim put his arm around her. ‘Come on,’ he said softly. ‘I didn’t mean it like that. We’ll talk about it later, OK? Have you made her cake for tomorrow?’
Soony had sixteen candles on her cake. She wore a cardboard policeman’s helmet and blew out all the candles while everyone sang Happy Birthday.
‘Happy Birthday, dear Soony,’ sang June and Jim and Miss Janes and Keith and Doris and Alice and Sue.
After tea, they played Sardines and Pass the Parcel and Musical Bumps. Soony was always the last to sit down when the music stopped, but she refused to be out on her birthday. When Jim declared that Soony and Alice and Doris were the joint winners, Soony danced ecstatically round the room.
‘June dear,’ whispered Miss Janes. ‘I don’t like to criticize. But don’t you think Soony has put on a lot of weight?’
‘Yes,’ said June. ‘That’s just what I’ve been thinking.’
After the party, June didn’t feel very well.
‘Go and soak in a nice warm bath,’ said Jim, ‘and Soony and I will see to the clearing up.’
‘You’re lovely,’ said June. ‘Both of you.’
‘I know,’ Soony said. She smiled.
When June was in the bath, Soony stood outside the door. ‘I need to go!’ she shouted.
‘Come in; it’s not locked.’
Soony came in and sat on the toilet.
‘Did you enjoy your party, Soony?’ June asked.
‘Yes,’ said Soony absently. She stood up and flushed the toilet.
‘Soony, have you still got your period?’
‘Yes,’ said Soony. She beamed.
‘Have you remembered to change your Tampax since lunchtime?’
‘Yes,’ Soony agreed.
‘Are you sure? Had you better do it again?’
‘Oh all right then,’ Soony said. She took a Tampax out of the box, unwrapped it and flushed it down the toilet. She laid the wrapper on the edge of the bath.
‘No Soony,’ said June. ‘You have to put it in. Remember? Take the old one out and put the new one in?’
‘No,’ Soony said.
‘Yes,’ said June. ‘Like you always do. You know how to...’
‘I always do it like this,’ Soony said. She unwrapped another one pulled it apart and dropped it into the toilet. The paper wrapper she handed to June.
June sat up, causing waves. ‘Oh my God!’ she said.
‘Soony,’ said June. ‘That weekend you stayed at Springfields...’
‘It must have been before that,’ said Jim.
‘Oh yes, of course it must have been,’ said June distractedly. ‘Oh God, I can’t think.’
‘Soony,’ Jim said. ‘Who’s your best friend?’
‘Popcorn,’ said Soony promptly.
‘Yes, but at Springfields?’
Soony thought. ‘Doris.’
‘Doris, yes, and who else?’
Soony thought. ‘Don’t know.’
‘Alice, isn’t there? And Sue?’
‘Yes. Sue,’ agreed Soony. ‘And Alice.’
‘And which of the boys? Jim asked, ‘Who’s your boyfriend then?’
Soony began to laugh. ‘Dirty bugger!’ she crowed.
‘Yes, but who...’
Soony stood up. ‘Bye,’ she said. ‘I’m going to bed.’
‘Just a minute, Soony,’ said Jim, raising his voice.
‘Let her go,’ said June. ‘Goodnight, Soony darling. I’ll come up in a minute to tuck you in. You can’t ask her too many questions at once,’ she explained, when Soony had gone. ‘She gets confused.’
‘What about her confusing us!’ shouted Jim. ‘All that rigmarole, pretending to have periods! She’s led us a right dance, hasn’t she?’
‘There’s no point in getting angry,’ June said wearily. ‘There could be some other explanation. Let’s not jump to conclusions till I’ve taken her to the doctor’s.’
‘What other explanation could there be?’ Jim exclaimed. ‘She’s a bit young for the menopause, at sixteen, don’t you think?’
‘It could be a simple hormone problem or something,’ said June. ‘God, I’m tired. Shall we go to bed?’
‘Yes, come on,’ he said. ‘I just hope you’re right, that’s all.’
‘Jim,’ she said. ‘Are you asleep?’
‘No. What?’
‘You remember when Soony first came here she used to talk about Keith?’
‘No’
‘She did. She used to roar with laughter every time she mentioned his name. She called him a dirty bugger.’
Jim sat up and switched on the light. ‘Did she? Did you ask why?’
‘No, not really. I never thought to ask. Oh, I wish I had! Jim, she really has got quite a tummy now.’
‘Hormones?’
They were both silent. Then he said, ‘Which one is Keith?’
‘You know. He was at the party. He drives the van.’
‘What, that Keith? Don’t be ridiculous, June; he’s normal.’
‘So?’ she said, offended. ‘Look, why else would she call him that?’
‘For God’s sake, June do you think any man in his right mind...’
‘What makes you think he’s in his right mind?’
‘What?’
‘You don’t know. Just because someone works at Springfields it doesn’t mean they haven’t got problems of their own.’
‘It should do! They’re vetted, interviewed.’
‘It's not infallible, is it? Just because somebody has no previous convictions ….'
‘Yes, but... Come off it, June! I mean, I love Soony, you know that, but anyone would have to be desperate...’
‘Exactly,’ said June.
‘But we know him! He’s all right. It couldn’t be him.’
‘Maybe not,’ said June. ‘But she’s never talked to me about anyone else. Has she to you?’
‘No.’
There was another silence.
‘I’ll talk to Miss Janes,’ June said.
‘Not yet,’ said Jim quickly. ‘Not till we’ve got the result of the test. We’d look so ... I don’t know.’
‘Is that all you’re worried about?’ said June furiously.
‘Of course it’s not, for God’s sake. I’m just saying wait till we’re sure.’
‘Yes,’ said June. ‘I’m sorry. In any case,’ she added, ‘I suppose if she is pregnant then it doesn’t make much difference who the culprit was.’
‘Yes it does,’ said Jim. ‘Because I’m going to kill him.’