*
"Natalie!"
Natalie stiffened, wiping furiously at the tears before stepping again toward the mansion exit. You made an utter ass of yourself, Nat. She pressed her lips into a thin line, stumbling from the mansion as she wiped another volley of tears from her cheeks.
"Natalie, wait!"
How am I going to face him? But she had to. She couldn't walk away now that she found both him and a lab. All her life she felt something waited, just out of her reach. Now she had this chance, and the feeling no longer lurked in the shadows of her soul. She had finally found her purpose: Saving Vincent from whatever hell he fled to each time he submerged into that scarred coffin.
And now he might suspect her feelings.
She choked on a sob, frantically wiping more wetness from burning cheeks. Natalie stumbled to a stop and leaned against the base of the well.
Tifa came to stand beside her, resting a hand on her back. "Natalie?"
"What?" Natalie choked out.
"You okay?"
"Does it look like I'm okay?" Natalie shoved Tifa's hand away. "I just humiliated myself in front of the only man I ever wanted to impress, and you think I might be okay?" Natalie covered her face and shook her head. "Just kill me now and be done with it. My research is ruined, so it's unlikely I will ever be able to find a way to reverse what Hojo did. My one chance and this had to happen! It's not fair . . . ."
Tifa rubbed her shoe on the back of her leg. "Natalie--"
"What do you want?" Natalie cried, dropping her arms to her sides. "Haven't I humiliated myself enough? Must you come and see me like this? Just . . . leave me alone." She pushed from the well and stumbled away, disappearing into the inn.
Tifa stared after her, eyes dark. "Oh, Natalie . . . ." Then she slowly shook her head and made her way back to Shinra Mansion. At the doorway of the lab, she hesitated for a long moment before entering. Cloud stood in front of the two cylinders with crossed arms and a scowl. "Cloud, can I ask you something?"
"Hm."
"Does Vincent seem different to you?"
Cloud focused on her, face twisted in confusion. "Different? What do you mean?"
"I'm not really sure. I guess the fact he's out after so many months is difference enough, but there was something in his face when she left. Something I've never seen before. Did he say anything to you before going back in his box?"
"Nope. Just as tight-lipped as ever. Couldn't even get him to talk about her idea." Cloud glared down at his feet. "I didn't piss her off too bad, did I?"
"Surprisingly, no. She was upset, though."
"Damn." Cloud stretched his arms toward her. "Tif, why do I do this to people? Why do I find the quickest way to piss them off and then go that little bit extra?"
"Cloud, she wasn't angry. She was crying. All she could think about was Vincent and the research." Tifa glanced quickly over her shoulder. "Cloud, I . . . I think she's in love with him."
"What?"
Tifa nodded. "Really. I'm serious."
"How . . . when would she've had a chance? He's been in that box forever, and the only time he's been out was when he helped us."
Tifa shrugged. "I don't know the details, but I'd recognize that expression of misery anywhere. You heard what she said, didn't you? About caring about the research for him more than the planet?"
"Well, I'll be a--" Cloud broke off and strode to the computer, glaring down at it with an intensity reminiscent of the days when they desperately attempted to defeat Sephiroth and the Turks. "Okay, Tifa. This is what we're going to do. I need you to go to Rocket Town and get Cid and Shera. Tell them we need to get this computer up and running without using Mako. Who knows? Maybe this will help them come up with a new power source."
"Okay. What are you going to be doing?"
"I'm going to go around to the different towns to see if any of them have come up with any ideas. Maybe I'll run into Yuffie somewhere. Seems to me she was spouting some weird stories about power sources in Wutai and Gongaga that didn't have anything to do with Mako."
"Yuffie? Go figure."
Cloud smiled. "Yeah. No kidding."
"What about Natalie and Vincent?"
The smile faded. Cloud scrubbed at his scalp. "I don't know one way or the other, to tell you the truth. At this point, I just want to stay the hell out of the way. They'll deal with whatever's going on a whole lot better if we just butt out."
"I guess you're right."
Cloud shook his head. "Don't bet on it."
VII
WHISPERS OF HISTORY
knock-knock
Natalie blinked her focus from the genetic sciences research paper to the doorway. Vincent. All blood rushed to places unknown, and the speed with which she stood from the table did little to help her stomach and brain recover. "Hello." She set the report aside and tucked trembling fingers into the back pockets of her jeans.
Vincent motioned within, amber gaze as distant as the first time she saw him. "May I?"
"Oh! Of course. Please." She tidied the papers and periodicals, freeing up a chair in the process.
What do I do? Natalie absently pinched her lower lip, her eyes unable to focus elsewhere but the binding of one of her favorite reference books. Vincent continued into the room, but only to stand across from her position at the table. She knew, in her head, her comment about choosing him over the environment would--in all honesty--be taken as an innocent expression of fact.
She cleared her throat and wrestled her gaze to meet his. "How can I help you?" And little did he know the depth and breadth of that one, simple question. Silence settled, aggravating her previously conquered headache. "If you're concerned about the setback of the computer, don't be. We didn't always have them." She forced a smile. "I will simply dig my brain from the dust-bunnies and do the long-division myself. I'll be fine."
He didn't respond. She doubted he blinked. He only continued to watch her with glowing amber eyes and an unreadable expression stretched across his handsome face.
Natalie cleared her throat again, fingers pressing the reference book from her reach. "I . . . I'm sorry for losing my temper. Reactionism is a pet-peeve of mine--no, I'm not certain that is a word--especially when the person reacting doesn't listen to me. I, well, I tend to believe I know what is best for everyone, even when that is furthest from the truth."
"Cloud apologizes."
Natalie rubbed at her forehead. It continued to throb. "And the trend continues, with the 'other one' apologizing first. How I came to the talent of persuading the others to believe they're really to blame is beyond me." Again, Vincent offered no comment. She released a fast breath and motioned to the door. "I need some air. Care to join me?"
Vincent followed, still silent. Still hauntingly foreboding and intense. Natalie loved it. She shrugged into her jacket and tried not to groan. You are a sick soul, Nat. They stepped out into the late morning sunshine, Natalie tucking her hands into her pockets as she sent him a sidelong glance. The muscle at his jaw clenched furiously, his golden claw balled into a fist. Natalie dragged her gaze ahead. Damn it, Nat, you big-mouthed ego-maniac.
"You said you would be buying the mansion," he said, voice as guarded as his expression when Natalie peeked at him.
"Uh, yes. I, erm . . . ." She gulped when he finally met her gaze. Nat! "Of course you wouldn't be required to vacate, nor stay in the basement. You could have your own floor. Well, if I didn't need it, that is." Vincent shifted his gaze to the mansion. "I am forever delving into some type of half-crazy research project, so I might need all the floors. But you're welcome to a room or three."
Vincent didn't respond.
Come on, Vincent, please. Natalie paused at the gate to the mansion's front walk, gripping the cool iron. "Talking with Barret and Nanaki inspired me to put all my effort into designing and researching environmentally safe solutions. The mansion would be the perfect place to setup. There are rooms enough that I could coordinate several projects at the same time."
br /> "Such as?"
Natalie lifted a shoulder. "Oh, you know. My usual research of the reaction human cells have to Mako or Jenova cells when forcefully introduced." She peeked at him. "And then there's my dig projects, which always includes cataloguing and researching the finds and how they effected our history. It's quite interesting, on paper."
"Why did you begin genetic research?"
Her heart thudded in her chest, agonizing to say the least. "At first, I simply could not fathom why Hojo--or anyone--would do that to people. Then, as I read more articles and learned more about him . . . he was capable of so much more insanity. All because he lusted after some power that existed in his mind. I don't know what he thought he proved by experimenting on all those people. Nothing good ever resulted from it." Her gaze flickered toward Vincent. "Well, almost nothing."
Vincent regarded her. "What exactly did Hojo alter?"
"Well, it's complicated." Natalie cleared her throat. "Um, each of our genes has the molecule deoxyribonucleic acid or DNA." She cleared her throat again. "When one or more genes of an organism are introduced to a second organism and is accepted, that's called recombinant DNA. In your case, the genes inserted consisted of Jenova genes. This recombinant DNA then altered the characteristics of the organism--you--by changing its protein makeup."
"Protein makeup?"
"Proteins perform vital functions in our body. Enzymes, for example, cause chemical reactions within an organism while hormones control growth, our metabolism, and reproduction."
"So, this recombinant DNA injected into my cells altered this . . . this protein, thereby altering me," Vincent said slowly.
"Essentially, yes." Natalie clutched tighter upon the gate, trying so hard not to look . . . she sighed and allowed her eyes to drift to Vincent's profile as he stood beside her. To her surprise, his amber eyes scrutinized her face with bright intensity.
"If this DNA has been accepted by my own, how could you possibly reverse the alteration? You have said the protein makeup of my DNA has been altered from what it was, so how . . . ?"
"I . . . I know." Her gaze faltered and fell. "It sounds ridiculously simple, but I planned to reintroduce your original DNA into your system."
"How?"
"Well, though the protein makeup of your DNA was altered, the DNA contained in your sperm wasn't." She pinched her lower lip. "You are the host, so you alone are affected by the alteration. I was going to use that DNA to re-introduce your original DNA and alter the protein makeup back to its original specifications." But there was a risk he wouldn't survive the procedure. After all, more than 30 years had passed since the original experiment. It was a question she still didn’t have the answer to.
"If that doesn't work, did you have another option?"
Oh god--"I don't want to talk about it." She pushed from the gate, her steps leading her down the path from Nibelheim to Mt. Nibel. No. No ‘other option’, Nat. You agreed. Remember? After several moments, she could hear his steps continue after her.
"What is it?" Vincent asked.
"Nothing. I . . . I never cared for the other option." Because it would have made her no better than the man who had done this to Vincent in the first place. No better than the man who tortured Cloud and his friend Zack. No better than a man who killed her mentor, Professor Gast.
Vincent regarded her a moment. “Cloning?”
Natalie twitched without meaning to. Then she simply gave a brief nod, her hands fisted at her sides as she continued forward. At least he would be ali– No!
"There is something else."
Natalie shook her head almost too quickly. "Don't worry about it."
Vincent's golden clawed fingers enfolded her arm, halting her progress. She faced him before she could stop herself. "Why do you believe I may die if you reintroduce my original DNA?"
Her insides lurched. How did he read her so well? Natalie wrestled her focus from those eyes and sighed deep. "The Jenova cells influenced your DNA in a way I can't categorize. You don't age--" She peeked at him. "Did you know you're almost 60 years old?--your eye pigment altered to red, which caused your visibility to become enhanced, and you now have the ability of flight. Well, more a manipulation of gravity I suspect, but the details aren't important. Then there are the alter-egos which emerge when you reach certain levels of . . . rage."
Natalie rubbed her forehead with a single finger, the hand digging fingers into the hip of her jeans. "I don't know how the Jenova will react to the re-introduction process. It may accept the procedure. It may ignore it altogether. Or it could completely shut down your system because of some type of unknown incompatibility."
"In other words, Jenova may prove to be stronger than my original DNA."
"To put it simply, yes." Natalie sighed and met his gaze. "I want to believe it's possible. Then again . . ." She turned away, walking again toward Mt. Nibel. Her misery settled in the pit of her stomach with a wave of nausea. "I just don't know what to do," she murmured.
"Do you perform the procedure and risk my death? Or leave me to my misery?"
Natalie cringed.
"You doubt my current existence is misery?"
"Yes," she said, matter-of-fact. She faced him. "All your friends have said they like you just the way you are. They say you are fun to be around, though you will never admit that fact. Which leads me to wonder, is your life really that miserable?"
Vincent's eyes flickered before he looked away. "Perhaps."
"Perhaps?" Natalie repeated. She shoved her hands into her pockets to keep from reaching out. "What type of answer is that?"
"The only one I can give at the moment. Many things are changing, and I haven't had a chance to . . . ." His voice drifted.
Natalie examined his expression. "Vincent, do you mind if I ask you a question?"
"No." Though his answer seemed guarded.
"Why do you want me to change you back?"
Vincent stared ahead of them so long Natalie didn't think he would answer. Then, finally, in a somewhat cool voice he admitted, "In this form I am . . . Hojo's creation. His slave and puppet. If I don't attempt to free myself of his influence, then he has won the final battle. I refuse to give him this power when there may yet be an avenue of release." He faced her. "He took my life without permission. He acted as a god and chose this existence with no thought of what my future would be. That control wasn't his to take, and I have chosen to take it back. You are my only hope of that."
Natalie swallowed hard, his amber gaze easily holding hers captive. There it is, Nat. She had asked a question that rang with all his burdens, and yet he opened his heart and presented his answer without a blink. What would she do now? Steal away even this last hope? No. No, she couldn't do that.
"I have never admitted to hope before," Vincent continued. "I suppose it comes from the life I experienced with Cloud and the others. I am more able to accept the impossible as a reasonable truth. After all, isn't that what we accomplished in the rescuing of this planet?" He motioned toward her, his claw reflecting the light of the morning sun. "Now you take on the implausible goal of crafting a cure for a monster. You accept it as your life's quest and move on, even in the face of the current set-back. I find my hope becoming . . . more than what it was."
Vincent shifted his amber scrutiny to Shinra Mansion. Natalie watched his profile in wide-eyed wonder.
"For what seemed ages I enclosed myself in that box, believing it a suitable punishment for whatever great sin I had committed. In reality, it became my way of hiding from life. I did not want to face alone what we had once shared together."
Vincent examined her face for a long and silent moment before shifting his focus once again to the mansion. "I have acted the part of a coward for many years, yet another way Hojo shamed me. I was a Turk, but I allowed them to tuck me away and forget. Taking my life back when the others found my resting place . . . felt exhilarating. Duty. Purpose. These had been facets of my life as a Turk that became nothing but shadow, pushed as
ide by guilt and shame. Now I have yet another chance to find them. To find my place in this new existence. Why should I . . . ?"
Natalie took a step forward without realizing it. "Why should you . . . ?" She rested a hand on the coolness of his golden claw. "Vincent? Why should you what?"
Vincent moved his gaze to her again, and the expression in his normally guarded amber eyes shocked her: confusion and helplessness. She stifled a gasp, her other hand retreating from his arm.
His eyes hardened and he turned away. "Why should I fight against attaining that which I desire?"
Natalie stared up at him, watching the breeze tease the long, ebony locks from his face. "I don't know. Why should you?"
The intensity of the ensuing silence hit her like a wave. Then he was saying "I must go," in a taut voice and propelling himself into the air with a great leap, vaulting toward Mt. Nibel.
Natalie took a step after him before she could stop herself. But then he was gone and she was left to stare at the horizon.