And, your break has got to be over. Get back to work!
Chapter 17
There were no more tears left to cry. She knew it to be true, because they had all been shed in this last week. After multiple days of trying on cloches with asymmetrical net face veils and donning four-layer tulle veils (the longest veil hanging down the back, while the other three come forward to cover the face), Sarah gave up, well, that is right after one last attempt to attach a cluster of six flowers around the right side of her tiara... unsuccessfully.
Here it was her wedding day and she still looked like something out of a nightmare. The mirror spoke its unkindness to her, and in Technicolor, no less. Her eyes were still a rich blue, which clashed terribly with the white of the left eye. Mainly because it was no longer white, it was a sickly yellow-pink combination, only to be marred further with red vein roadmaps that ran unrelentingly through it. Add to that the two black sutures of the original seven that were still in the fleshy skin beneath that eyeball.
The piece de resistance, however, was her cheek. Perched directly on the eye socket bone were the proofs of her injury, five pink suture scars. No, that was not the major flaw. It's from that point down that the real affront began. It was an abstract artist's delight, a work in ombre. From a medium purple, the bruise faded down her cheek to a sickly puce, then ultimately a jaundiced yellow.
As she gazed at a face that could not belong to her, Sarah mournfully raised her small voice to the One who designed that face.
"Lord, I can't believe that it is my wedding day, the day I have looked forward to my whole life, and this is what Dean will see walking, in a still painful and awkward gait, toward him up the aisle. He has reassured me so many times I can't count them that he thinks I'm beautiful and he is marrying me for so many reasons that have nothing to do with my face, with or without injury.
"You knew from before time that my wedding day would include this challenge. And, since that's so, I guess I have a choice to make.
"I can become bitter, blaming You for allowing this to happen. Or, I can choose to praise You, and acknowledge that Your Plan for me is so much better than anything I can even anticipate."
Sarah stopped mid-prayer. It really is my choice, isn't it? It is totally in my own heart how I choose to see this and how I will respond to it.
Lifting her eyes to heaven, she completed her prayer.
"Jesus, I've fretted over this long enough. Forgive me. I all but threatened my mother that if she didn't let me go ahead with the wedding today I'd make sure she'd be sorry. Forgive me. I've pretty much hidden myself away from almost everyone this last week, because of embarrassment about my looks. Forgive me.
"I'm choosing to give you thanks and praise instead.
"So...
"Thank you for parents who are giving me the most beautiful wedding a girl could imagine. Thank you for a man who loves You first, and me second. Thank you for this beautiful church to get married in. Thank you for family and friends who are coming today to celebrate with us, just because they love us.
"But most of all, Lord, thank you for my salvation. The injuries You sustained that day were far beyond mine. And, Your Wounds were voluntary and for selfless reasons. They were for me.
"I'm choosing, Jesus, to rejoice today. I'm going to hold my head high as I walk down that aisle. Not from a rebellious pride that dares anyone to even act as though they are shocked at my damaged appearance, but as a tribute to You. And, I ask that all the guests here today will see Christ in me.
"Let something truly amazing come from all this, Lord. In Your Name, I pray. Amen."
A peace not of this world settled over Sarah. Her shoulders relaxed, her hip hurt considerably less, and she was even smiling.
*****
Sarah had been sitting alone in the church's bridal room. The Lord had intervened, wanting this time to be between just the two of them. Once her petition to the Lord was completed, her bridal attendants began entering the room.
The day had not begun like she thought her wedding day would. The weather was chilly, there was almost no sun all day, and it had even drizzled earlier in the day. But none of that mattered, because it was now evening, smelling clean and fresh, and the stars were simply dazzling as she looked to the sky through the window.
Closing the privacy blinds, Sarah began chit-chatting with her girls. Even with the silliness of wedding night honeymoon predictions and the requests for help from all the girls to help zip-, tie-, lace-, or button up, the time they spent together in that dressing room was precious, holding memories that Sarah would long remember.
The only things that marred this time were the sympathetic looks that inevitably came from everyone present. She knew she was making the right choice not to cover the injured side of her face, but it was actually easier when she had worn the bandages. At least then no one knew how bad the damage really was, and everyone could pretend that maybe things underneath were not so bad after all.
Every single communication interaction between Sarah and any of her bridesmaids held something extra. Either, they avoided looking at her in the eyes, choosing rather to look elsewhere while laughing and chatting, accompanied by an arm- or shoulder squeeze, or they would look at her in the eyes, visibly wincing when Sarah would smile or speak, assuming that she was experiencing pain that must come with injuries that severe.
Sarah had been putting off completing her grooming until her bridesmaids started harassing her for not already having completed her hair, makeup, and donning her gown.
But time was moving on, and she realized she needed to "get to movin.'" After all, her eye makeup, foundation, powder and blush, even though only being applied to one side of her face, were not going to apply themselves. Fortunately, she just needed to refine some of her curls with a quick use of the curling iron. So, move she did.
As Sarah was applying the finishing touches of makeup to the right side of her face, plus adding a glosser to her lips, Kate walked in the door, holding a small paper or something in her hand. Sarah had noticed a change coming about in her mother. Rather than the distance between them toward the beginning of this last week, each day had softened Kate, until today she had nothing but kindness toward her daughter.
"Hey, Sweetie. I just ran into that adorable husband-to-be of yours in the sanctuary. He and his groomsmen were doing one final walk-through, reminding each other of the correct walking speed, who would accompany which bridesmaid, and practicing standing in their correct locations up front.
"Dean came up to me and thanked me for all the years I'd invested in you. He said that you wouldn't be the woman you are today without my contribution.
"Was that a precious thing to say? I can see why you love him so much. He is an amazing man!"
"He is, isn't he?!"
Sarah pulled Kate by the hand into the restroom. After closing the door, she spoke.
"Mom, first I want to tell you how sorry I am for some of the things I said this week after the accident. They were unkind and I can't believe I spoke to you that way, when you have done so much for me. I knew even at the time I was breaking the Lord's Heart being so disrespectful, but didn't stop myself. Will you forgive me?"
"Already forgiven and forgotten."
"Thank you. And secondly, I want to thank you for this beautiful, beautiful wedding you and Daddy are giving Dean and me. I know you have worked so hard. And, even though I know you love to decorate anyway, I know that all you've done in the planning has been through a selfless gift of love.
"I am so grateful!"
"You are so welcome, Honey.
"You are such a joy to us. We are so proud of the woman you choose to be, and we are so completely convinced that Dean is exactly who the Lord has given you.
"Now, before you and I completely have a melt down and get all puffy-eyed crying, we better get you back in there and get you into your wedding gown. I can hardly wait to see Dean's face when he sees you coming down the aisle."
Kate tipp
ed her head sideways, as she looked thoughtfully at Sarah.
"Your hair looks just beautiful. I think the tiara will look fantastic among all those long curls of yours. Your Grandma would be so proud that you're using it."
"Thank you, Mom."
Sarah and Kate opened the restroom door to re-enter the bridesmaid's realm, but Kate pulled Sarah back in and said, "Oh, I almost forgot what I was going to give you.
"I wanted you to see the insert that is in each wedding program.
"I so hope you're pleased."
Handing her daughter a small piece of elegant stationery, Kate stood there quietly while Sarah perused its presentation and contents.
First, she noticed that the shadowy ichthus in the background with the superimposed and overlapping wedding rings was identical to the pattern on the wedding invitations and the cover of the programs. Her mom had kept the theme running throughout. Then, her eyes swept down to the wording, which immediately caused unshed tears to pool in her eyes.
"Many daughters have done virtuously,
But thou excellest them all.
Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain:
But a woman that feareth the Lord,
She shall be praised." ~ Proverbs 31:29, 30.
Last week Sarah was brutally attacked by a kitchen cabinet.
Although she persevered to win the battle,
She still bares the wounds of that skirmish.
Many of you know of this incident, but for those of you
Who do not, we want to express our whole-hearted
Approval in the couple's decision to move ahead at this time
In marrying one another, despite this challenge.
Our heartfelt blessings to Sarah and Dean.
Kate and JB Dayton
Although she had finished reading the insert, Sarah stared at it further, unblinking. If her eyes closed even just to blink, she felt like the floodgates would spring open and any tears that had not yet sprung forth, would surely fight and claw amongst themselves to be the first to be released.
"Sarah, this is good, right?"
"Mom, it's more than good. I was so afraid that you'd always be angry with me for insisting on going ahead with the wedding, even though I know how bad I look.
"The good thing is that my hip doesn't hurt this evening. I don't know that the limp is gone yet, but I am so thankful that the pain is gone.
"I wish my face were healed, but at least now I don't think any of the guests will faint dead away from the shock of my appearance. Giving them this warning was a super idea. Thank you for the little bit of comic relief in it, '... Sarah was brutally attacked by a kitchen cabinet...'. And I hope you really meant the verses above. I want the Lord's approval first, but it really feels good to hear it from you and Daddy."
"You beautiful child! We are beyond proud. You trust the Lord for all the happenings in your life. And, you've chosen well the mate for your life. I have done a lot of thinking and praying this week about my own behavior.
"You know, I saw you the day you visited Caitlin. That was the day I really began re-thinking my attitude about things in general, and in particular whether you should or should not continue with today's wedding.
"I was standing in the living room close to the front window and saw you approaching their house. Jennifer and I went out in the backyard. I asked her for her take on the whole situation. I knew Caitlin would keep you occupied until Jennifer and I were finished talking.
"Jennifer sided with you. She told me that you were an extraordinary young woman who loves Jesus and simply needs to move on in your life with Dean."
"You knew that I was there the whole time? Well, thank you for letting me have that time with Caitlin. She is amazing!
"Mom, how bad is her cancer? Will this chemo take care of it? She looked so weak and pale."
"I would love to stand here on your wedding day and relieve your mind by telling you that she's going to be just fine. But, the truth is that while the Lord is the only One who knows the number of our days, unless He chooses to intervene, no... Caitlin is not going to be ok. Well, to put it the way Jennifer does, 'It may be that the Lord is going to grant her the ultimate healing and take her home.'"
"Are Jennifer and Caitlin coming this evening?"
"I don't know, Honey. When I arrived, the only people in the sanctuary were Dean and his groomsmen. It was too early for any guests to arrive. I spoke with Dean a few moments and then came straight back here. But, I truly believe that Caitlin would be the first to tell you to truly cherish this day and rejoice that you have found 'the one whom your soul loveth'."
Sarah gave her one of those looks that said, Wait... Seriously?! You're telling me that a kid would say, 'the one whom your soul loveth'?
"Well... maybe she'd say it differently, but that would be the sentiment.
"Now, let's get you back in the room and get you dressed for this beautiful wedding."
Sarah nodded her assent and walked from the restroom back into the bridal room. Because Kate was already in her dress, she was able to give Sarah her complete attention.
While Kate buttoned up all of the five hundred buttons down the back of Sarah's gown... ok, maybe only fifty buttons... they were quiet. Talking seemed unnecessary. She was grateful for a silent moment. It was during this time that Sarah lifted up two requests before the Lord. One, a prayer for Caitlin's health and the other, praise for her mother's softness and change of heart.
As she prayed, Sarah realized that two really good things had come from this accident, meeting Caitlin and having her mother confirm that Sarah was right to go ahead with her wedding, despite her wounds.
*****
Sarah could hear the soft romantic strains of classical music coming from the organ in the sanctuary. Even though the doors were shut, the melodies floated into the foyer, where she and her father were the only two left to enter the ceremony.
Although the wedding coordinator was not with them, she had given instructions to the organist that Canon in D was not to be started until after the two doors swung open.
Sarah was to have total control over the very moment she would enter. When Sarah had asked how the doors would open if no one was in the foyer with them, the woman had explained that several years prior to this, the church had installed an automatic door opener for this very reason, and pointed to the wall button that should be pushed when the bride and her father were ready to enter. She told Sarah that there was a five-second delay, then the doors would swing open. She made sure they knew to clear the door swing range by standing behind a certain stripe in the carpeting.
In the moments left before her entry on her father's arm, she visually scanned the foyer. Her mother had even included this area in the extensive decorating. There were white sparkle lights draped on every wall and wrapped down the guestbook stand. Large clusters of magnificent flowers were attached to four Greek columns Kate had brought in, each flanking a set of double entry doors.
Just a minute or two and she would hit that button and begin her entrance.
Somehow during this last moment before the pomp and circumstance of her entry, her hand involuntarily loosened grip on her bouquet and it plunged to the floor. It must be nerves! Bending and reaching down to retrieve it, an intense pain shot through her left eye and down the left cheek. Her hand immediately flew to her eye, rather than to the lavish and fragrant bouquet on the floor.
The flash of pain disappeared as quickly as it appeared, but that was all that it took to remind Sarah of her disfigured face.
"Oh, that hurt so much."
"Sweetheart, let me take a look. This may be one of the biggest advantages to having a father who's a doctor."
"No, Daddy, the pain is gone. Could you just pick up my bouquet? Really, there's no pain at all left."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes," she responded, turning to face him and straighten his bow tie.
"By the way, you sure look handsome tonight. I knew you would, but...
"
Sarah felt a tap on her left arm, to which she turned. There stood little Caitlin with a little white tissue wrapped package, which she extended to Sarah.
"I was so afraid I'd miss you before you went in. This is for you. You don't have to use it, but I wanted to give it to you as a special gift for your wedding. Mom and I are going to go in and sit down now. I can hardly wait to see you come in."
And with that brief encounter with Sarah, Caitlin and her mother entered a side door to be seated for the wedding ceremony.
Thinking that maybe Caitlin had made her another sparkly ribbon to wear during her honeymoon, or a bedazzled pouch purse to carry during the time she and Dean were away in Tahiti, she came very close to asking her dad to put it in a pocket until during the reception, when she would open it in front of Caitlin and the others in attendance.
However, something within her needled her to open it now, so open it she did. When some ribbon began sliding out the opening, she confirmed within herself that she was right, it was a ribbon for her hair. But, it kept sliding out, longer and longer and longer. It actually puddled on the floor now, and frankly Sarah was puzzled beyond words what Caitlin could possibly have been thinking by making it so long.
Continuing to unwrap it, another ribbon slithered through Sarah's fingers and joined in a second puddle on the floor. Sarah's father bent to pick them up and held them in his hands, as curious as Sarah as to what in the world this was. The two ribbons, each at least six feet long, gave no clue as to what the remainder of the package's contents would be. But, since the two extensions of ribbon didn't fall completely out, they must be attached to something.
When the last flap of white tissue was released, Sarah and her father gasped.
"Sarah, that is the most amazing thing I've ever seen!"
"Daddy, do you know what this is?"
"I've never seen one like this before, but yes, I do."
There in Sarah's own hands lay the most extraordinary eye patch ever seen! It was over-sized. It would certainly cover Sarah's left eye, but almost half her cheek as well. It was made from white satin, lined with more satin on the back.
"That's the shape of an amoeba. I really like the way it curls up and around. I guess that side would be on the outside of your eye. What are those gems?"