Page 10 of My Defender


  "Now there is a sound I will never tire of hearing." Grant shifted her slightly to one side and easily held her weight with one arm while he opened the door with his opposite hand.

  She couldn't believe he had no problem carrying her about like a rag doll.

  "Does Benji's weight even register with you?" she asked.

  He shook his head. "Not really."

  He carried her inside and shut the door behind them. "Does this count for carrying you across the threshold?"

  "I would say it does."

  He carefully set her on her feet. "Trust me?"

  "You know I do."

  He grabbed her hand. "I want to show you something."

  She dropped her bag in the foyer before he led her through the house and out the back door. For a moment, she was confused. She looked around. "Are we still in Noctem Falls?"

  The moment they walked through his back door, they'd stepped into a dark forest. Overhead, the night sky was clear, and the stars twinkled like bright diamonds. Soft grasses and fallen leaves cushioned her feet as she stepped farther into this impossible forest. She could actually smell the earth, petrychor, and the crisp scent of snow. Unlike the icy weather of her home city, she was comfortable enough that she didn't need a coat, even though the scents and breezes made her think of winter.

  "Is this real?" she whispered. She spun around, looking for evidence that she was still in the caves of the vampire city.

  "Yes, in a way." He led her deeper into the woods until they came upon a clearing with a trickling brook. "This is my place of solace." He sat down and gently pulled her down beside him. "Shifters don't do well in Noctem Falls when they first arrive. Our animals feel caged and trapped, me more than most because I had lived wild for so long." He laid them back and pulled her close to his body. "Micah must have noticed how many patrols I requested topside and asked if there was anything he could do to make my house more of a home for me. I flippantly requested a forest." He shook his head. "I should have known he'd see it as a challenge."

  Sighing contently, Ellie snuggled closer. Grant's simple place of solace allowed him a safe haven where the world fell away, and he was sharing it with her.

  "How'd they do this?"

  "No idea. Micah is more of an air witch, and we didn't have the twins back then. I think Leif did most of the spells, since he's the best at earth magic. All my unit brothers contributed. They created barriers so that the only way in or out is through the back door. It's completely safe and soundproofed. After they finished, my wolf calmed down, and this really became his home."

  "The sky looks so real," Ellie held up her hand, reaching as if to touch the moon.

  "They pulled from some of my fondest memories."

  In the background, the melodic howl of a distant wolf echoed through the trees. Moments later, the wolf was answered by many voices lifting to the sky.

  She propped herself up on her hand to look at her mate. "The pack you lost?"

  He nodded then broke out in a smile. "The poor alpha female had no idea what to make of me. Human but not, alpha evidently, but also a pup. She pulled me out of more scrapes than my father ever had."

  "What about the male alpha?"

  He turned to face her. "He was older, but still very strong. He let me run wild but bit my ass more times than I could count to keep me in line. Looking back, he was very tolerant of me."

  Ellie hesitated, but wanted an answer from her mate. "Why do you think you're a monster?" She could tell him all day long he wasn't, but she knew from personal experience it was hard to change the way you perceived yourself.

  He reached out and traced her lips with his thumb. "I learned that gesture just recently watching Declan with his mate." He let his hand fall away. "Even though I grew up human for the first twenty years of my life, I saw no tenderness between mates, especially my parents. My father routinely abused both my mother and me. He used his position as Alpha to get away with it." He rolled onto his back and threaded his fingers under his head. "The first gentleness I ever experienced, except from my mother, was from a pack of wild animals, and make no mistake, as much as I loved them, they were wild animals. We'd mercilessly take down the young of other species to eat and leave our own sick behind to die to keep the pack safe. They taught me to survive, not much more." He sighed. "You deserve so much more."

  Ellie couldn't stand the sound of his pain a moment longer. Gathering her courage, she quickly straddled her mate before she lost her nerve. His eyes widened. "That makes you just about perfect."

  He frowned in confusion. "Come again?"

  "In showing you how to be mates, I technically will be teaching you exactly what my wants and needs are," she said. He still looked confused. "Okay, look at it this way: all your factory default settings regarding relationships will be optimized to suit me perfectly."

  His expression cleared. "I never thought about it like that." He paused. "You really don't think I'm dangerous."

  She laughed. "Of course you are." He scowled fiercely, and she leaned in to gently tease his lips. "But never to me or Benji or your friends or anyone else you care about. There's a difference between being a danger to society in general and being protective of the ones you love."

  "I do, you know."

  "Do what?"

  "Love you."

  She felt her heart pick up. "I love you too." Now it was her turn to be confused. "Isn't it too soon?"

  He smiled one of his rare sexy smiles up at her. "I've heard that mothers fall in love with their babies the moment they see them, for some, the moment they know they exist. I've loved my mate from the moment I realized I might have one. When I saw you for the first time it was as if everything I had experienced and done led me to that one moment when all became right with my world. I was created just for you as you were for me. That one second in time became my own personal miracle. I'm a selfish, selfish bastard Ellie, because I am never going to let you go. I couldn't survive without my heart and soul, and you have become both and more. You have become the best of me. If I lost you, I would be a desolate shell, and I would fear for my brothers, for they would be the only ones capable of ending my life and sending me into your arms once again."

  Ellie blinked, and tears fell from her cheeks to Grant's throat. He sat up and wrapped his arms around her. "That wasn't supposed to make you cry."

  "How could that not make me cry? I'm not used to men even opening the doors for me, and you say something beautiful like that," she sniffled into his shirt.

  "Good. I'm glad they didn't open any doors."

  She pulled back. "How can you say that?"

  He growled low. "Because if they had, they would have checked out your ass, and then there would be a whole slew of men I'd have to kill."

  Ellie stared up into his face. "That kinda turned me on."

  The frown disappeared and was instantly replaced with an expression of pure lust. "Really?"

  "You make me feel wanted. To someone who has been ignored her entire life, that is intoxicating."

  "You are very, very wanted," he whispered huskily against her ear. She shivered and felt him begin to harden against her body.

  "Show me," she answered.

  He quickly rolled them until she was on her back, and he loomed over her. He quickly pulled his shirt off, and his hands went to his pants.

  "Slowly."

  He raised an eyebrow, and she blushed. "Please?"

  He stood and looked down at her. His eyes never left hers, and he ran his thumb along the waist of his pants. He unbuttoned his slacks and let them fall before stepping out of them. When Ellie saw the darkening wet spot on the front of his boxer briefs, she licked her lips, and his control snapped. He practically ripped the last piece of clothing from his body, and seconds later, he stood before her, a piece of breathing art.

  "The gods themselves must have had a hand in creating you," she whispered. His body was masculine beauty at it's finest. Smooth pale skin rippled and moved over muscle as he bent
down and crawled toward her. His eyes had turned to a light amber color, and his canines were peeking out from his upper lip. She could see his wolf was riding him hard.

  When her hands went to her shirt, he growled. "Let me." She laid back and watched him get closer.

  Very gently, he removed the first shoe, then the other, quickly followed by both socks. He ran his hands up the outside of her legs before bringing them together at her waist. He unbuttoned her jeans and slowly pulled them down her body, taking her panties along with them.

  With one fluid motion, he pulled her body closer so she could feel his hard length slide against her slick folds. She thought he would enter her at any moment, but she was wrong. He continued undressing her, torturing them both as each movement he made rubbed them against each other, teasing them mercilessly. He pushed her bra and sweatshirt up over her head. She lifted her back so that the garments could finally be thrown to one side.

  When all their clothes were finally off, he stared down at her, a reverent look on his face. "Now we begin."

  She nodded, bracing herself for his possession.

  He shocked her when he pulled away. Starting at her foot, he kissed her softly. "How many miles have you walked up and down halls treating little ones?" She couldn't answer; she just stared at him confused.

  He kissed his way up her leg. "I love your legs." He winked at her. "They carried you to me."

  Skipping her mound, he stared at her belly. She felt icy embarrassment flood her body. She covered her abdomen with her hands.

  He bent down and nipped at her fingers until she moved them. "All of you belongs to me. How could you think I wouldn't love every inch of you, especially this most sacred part?" Tenderly, he ran his hands over her waist. "Right here is where our child will grow." He leaned down and kissed below her belly button.

  Ellie felt her own lips trembling from the effort not to sob. No one had ever looked at her and seen something beautiful before.

  Grant allowed his body to rest against hers, his weight pushing her into the soft grass. He laid his head on her chest and exhaled in pure bliss. "This comfort is what men die for. This comfort and warmth represent love and a place to call home." He teased her areola before squeezing her nipple gently, causing her to gasp. "Your beautiful body allows me to give you so much pleasure." He leaned over and ran a hot tongue over her hardened peak. "Our children will receive their first meal from your body; how could you hate such a miraculous thing?"

  Scooting up so that once again she could feel him throbbing at her entrance, she arched her back. When he looked down at her she had to turn her head. It was almost too painful to see the love in his eyes.

  "Look at me," he ordered.

  When she turned her head, her tears fell. "I'm not what you are describing. What will happen when you see me for what I really am?"

  "And what is that?"

  "Fat. Ugly." She looked away, almost choking on the words.

  "Look at me."

  She shook her head.

  "Ellie, my love, look at me."

  Defiantly, she looked up at him. Someday, he would leave. Someday, he would realize he was stuck with an embarrassment, and that day would destroy her. But when she looked into his eyes, she saw something she had never seen before.

  It was almost as if she could see herself through his eyes. The love she saw there promised that it would never hurt her, never leave. When she saw herself through his eyes, she saw something wondrous.

  "You are so pure and exquisite that I am afraid to touch you." When his hand reached up to cup her cheek, it trembled slightly. "Will you give me what I want most? What I crave?"

  "What?"

  "A home. Can I find my place in this world in you?" Grant placed his hand over her heart. "Will you let me live here and never leave?" She nodded; she couldn't speak.

  "Eleanor Kimball, will you do me the honor of becoming my mate? Will you give me permission to claim and defend my home?"

  "Yes, Grant Douglas, whatever I am, however you see me, I am yours. I will be your solace, your warmth, and your home," she promised.

  Though he smiled, two hot tears fell from his eyes to her cheeks. Leaning his weight to one side, he slipped his hand between them and guided his pulsing cock into her. Slowly, he slid in and out of her, never looking away. It didn't take him long to build his pace until he was thrusting as deep as he could.

  She held on to his biceps and took what he offered. He was branding her as his from the inside out. She flexed her hips downward, changing his angle, and he let out a harsh cry. He looked down at her his eyes wild. "My Ellie!"

  He lost all control and buried his face in her neck. "Never. I'm never letting you go!" With a savage howl, he thrust into her as far as her body would allow as his canines bit into her shoulder. She rode the wave of pain into an explosion of pleasure.

  "Grant!" She tilted her head back, arching her body.

  He pulled away, and she felt warmth begin to grow over her heart. They both watched as two mists lifted from their bodies and swirled together. They seemed to dance playfully before merging. They flickered once, then twice before separating to become two pieces.

  When the mist settled into her chest, she felt a sense of belonging. Never again would she face the world alone. Even if Grant wasn't at her side, he would forever be in her soul.

  He carefully pulled out of her body and collapsed to his side. He reached out his hand and rested it on her belly. She recognized the gesture for what it was, his need to constantly be touching her.

  She rolled until she could snuggle under his arm. Chuckling, he pulled her close.

  "Can we stay here forever?" she asked, knowing that eventually they would have to return to the real world.

  "We can stay here for as long as you like," he vowed.

  She knew that if they didn't have the children to tend to, he would keep that promise. He would let everything else in the world descend into chaos as long as he could be with her like this.

  Soon, they would have to get ready to return to their reality, but for now, she was content to lie in the grass, in her love's arms, and stare up at the stars.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  Ellie looked in the mirror and realized where the term afterglow came from. She looked amazing. Her skin was flushed and held a healthy sheen. For the first time in her life, her hair cooperated without her breaking down or offering up sacrifices to the gods. After discovering how Grant saw her, she felt comfortable in her skin for the first time in her life.

  When she looked in the mirror, his words echoed in her mind instead of the hateful words of her own self-doubt. She turned a bit, almost as if daring her subconscious to find something wrong, but she couldn't. Every time her mind started to focus on her curves, all she could remember was the way Grant's hands had trembled as he touched her. He made her feel like a siren. She took a deep breath and nodded at her own reflection.

  Grinning, she added a bit of lipstick and opened the bathroom door. Grant looked more relaxed than she had ever seen him, which wasn't long, but after their claiming the tightness around his eyes was gone. He sat in the chair and a half, his feet propped up on the ottoman, eyes closed.

  She cleared her throat, and he opened his eyes. "Damn baby, you look amazing." He frowned. "Do the others need to see you looking like that?"

  Ellie laughed. She was slowly beginning to see herself through his eyes. "This old thing?" She twirled in her black wrap dress. She knew it hugged her curves, and the plunging neckline played up one of her best features: her cleavage.

  "Maybe you could change into a burlap sack." He nodded. "Yes, a shapeless sack so that no one else can see your perfection but me."

  "I'd be worried if I thought you were serious." She held out a necklace. "Can you put this on me?"

  He popped up out of his chair and took the necklace from her. He carefully wrapped the chain around her neck and fastened it. Once he was done, he kissed the back of her neck. "I might be half serious."

/>   Ellie walked over to the nightstand and dropped her stone into the small clutch she had. "Do you have your stone?"

  Grant looked around the room. "I left it in my pocket."

  Ellie walked over to the closet. "Is it in here?" She reached for the knob. As she turned it, she heard Grant shout, "No!"

  Seconds later, an avalanche of blankets landed on her. She covered her face as the tsunami of yarn kept falling. When it was over, she looked at her feet. "Grant?"

  "Yes?"

  "What is this?"

  "You know how I knit to help with my anxiety?"

  "Yeah."

  He pointed to the pile of beautifully knit afghans. "Well, once the nightmares started, I was very anxious."

  "Oh baby," Ellie cooed then began to giggle. She could hardly turn around as she was completely surrounded by yarn.

  Grant carefully stepped between the mounds and lifted her out of the way. "That's the linen closet by the way. The actual closet is that one, across the room." Grant pointed to another door.

  "Grant, have you thought about donating these?"

  He shrugged. "I sell some of the more elaborate pieces through the commissary, but no one needs this many blankets."

  "I bet hospitals would, or maybe the children."

  He smiled. "Come here." He left the room and headed down the hall. When he reached for a doorknob, she hesitated.

  He laughed at her reluctance. "It's a room, not a closet." He opened the door and walked inside. She followed.

  When he turned on the lights, she was amazed. Each wall, from floor to ceiling, held nothing but knit and crocheted little animals arranged on white shelves. "Grant! They're adorable!" Her eyes immediately went to a small grey elephant. "Can I have this one?"

  He shrugged, smiling shyly. "You can have whatever you want."

  "Can we give these to the children?"

  He nodded. "That's what I was thinking; plus, they should carry my scent. It could help keep them calm without the Bolivars and I having to race around all the time."

  Ellie looked around excitedly. "We have time before dinner, let's pack some for later." He grabbed an empty canvas bag, and they crammed the thing full of stuffed animals and left it by the front door.