Writing a note to let Karen know I would be gone the rest of the afternoon, I placed it on her desk and locked up the office. The entire time I drove to the vet clinic I kept trying to talk myself into turning around. All I really had to do was call her and tell her she dropped the key. Maybe I was tired of running from her. If she was going to be living in Oak Springs, we needed to make peace.
By the time I pulled up and parked behind Harley’s SUV, I had successfully talked myself into dropping the key off with the front desk and leaving. I wasn’t ready to face Harley after just having had sex with Mallory.
What a douche I am.
Unfortunately, there were no other cars around but Harley’s.
Shit.
I pushed the truck door open and slid out. Glancing around, I smiled at the small touches Harley had already made to Doc Harris’s place. I guess it was her place now.
My feet felt like lead as I made my way up the steps of the porch. I reached for the doorknob and turned. As I walked in, I could hear Harley talking to someone. Remembering where Doc’s office was, I headed that way.
“I know you told him to leave me alone, but he came by the clinic today. He said he was going to take it from me. I panicked and went and saw Tripp but he was…well, he was busy. I need to look into getting a lawyer. I don’t think he is going to walk away from this like you thought he would. Doc, we’re missing something if he is making this claim.”
Frowning, I stepped into her office. She was standing with her back to me, looking out the window. Doc Harris had opened his practice on a couple of acres right outside of town. It was perfect because it had room for larger animals, as well as small ones.
“I’ll go to San Antonio on Monday to try and find a lawyer. I know, Doc, I know it would be easier to have him help me, but that’s not going to work. I’ll go to San Antonio on Monday.”
My heart started beating faster. Harley was in trouble. And there was no way I was going to let her find another lawyer, no matter what this was about. Not when she came to me first.
Clenching my fists together tightly, I prepared to jump off the ledge, right into the fire.
Hell, I was fixin’ to jump into the abyss.
“No, you won’t. You already have a lawyer.”
Harley spun around and stared at me with a stunned expression. She tried to hide it, but I saw the corners of her mouth lift before she looked away from me.
“Doc, let me call you right back.”
She hung up and focused on me. I smiled wide, expecting her to return it. But this was Harley. And even though she’d been initially happy to see me, she was now far from pleased.
In fact, she was downright pissed.
The sound of his voice made me jump. When I spun around and saw Tripp standing there, for one brief moment, I was happy. He came to me. Finally.
Then I remembered what I’d just walked away from in his office, and I turned from him. A sickness rolled through my stomach.
“Doc, let me call you right back.”
“Okay, Harley.”
When I’d placed my phone on my desk I stared at him. He had the nerve to smile that damn smile of his. The one that normally would have my knees shaking and my stomach dropping. His dimple on the left cheek that you rarely saw unless he was giving you a genuine smile, yep, there it was. There he was…in all his handsome glory. After years of begging him to talk to me, now he shows up and thinks he’s going to be my knight in shining armor. Well, fuck that.
My knees were far from shaking. Right now, his smile made me feel more pain than anything. He’d given her that smile when she walked into his office. Dressed like an on-call whore, with Tripp’s dimples on full display not that long ago. When I realized I had dropped my key in Tripp’s office, I went back in.
As I walked down the hall I heard Mallory moaning as she called out Tripp’s name. They were screwing in his office. It wasn’t like I didn’t know they were having sex…but to actually hear it nearly destroyed me.
Now he wanted to help? He couldn’t wait for me to leave so he could have his little lunch date. Well, no, thank you, Mr. Parker. I don’t want your help.
“What do you want?” I bit out.
His smile faded. “Well, first off, I’m here to finish the conversation you started when you barged into my office earlier.”
My hands went to my hips. “Oh, you mean when I interrupted your lunch fuck date.”
His brows pulled together.
“Excuse me? I was having lunch with my, um, girlfriend.”
Ouch. That hurt more than I thought it would.
Rolling my eyes, I pushed out a frustrated breath of air as I dropped into my chair.
“Well, if fucking your girlfriend in your office is your version of lunch, then lucky her.” I looked away quickly. I hadn’t meant to say that last part.
“I wasn’t fu—”
“Save it, Tripp. I realized I’d dropped my key and came back to your office to get it. I heard you both going at it like rabbits. So, please, I’m not really in the mood for this.”
His eyes filled with what looked like regret. “I’m…I’m sorry about that.”
Forcing a smile, I shrugged. “Why? Like you said, it’s your girlfriend. Not really something I expected from someone who is running for mayor, but then again, I guess I don’t really know you all that well anymore.”
I couldn’t help but notice how he cringed a little when I said that. Interesting.
I wonder how many more times I can get the word girlfriend into this conversation.
Tripp broke eye contact and walked to the window. He was totally lost in thought. I didn’t have time to deal with his issues. I had bigger problems of my own.
“Did you come to bring me back my key?”
He nodded and turned to face me. “Yeah. Here ya go.”
After he dropped it on my desk, I expected him to turn and leave. He had avoided me for so many years, I couldn’t believe one lost key would bring him around. It was almost laughable. I would probably have laughed if I didn’t want to cry so desperately.
I opened the file on my desk and started to read it.
“Why did you come to my office earlier?”
Lifting my gaze, our eyes met. He had aged into an even more handsome man. His dark hair, unshaven face, and finely sculpted body were enough to make my stomach pool with warmth. When my eyes went back to his hair, the feeling vanished. He had that just-fucked hair. Her hands had probably been pulling at it as he screwed her. I quickly dropped my head.
Damn it. He still has such a strong effect on my body. Both bad and good.
“It doesn’t matter anymore. It was a mistake and I should have known better.”
He sat down in the chair that faced my desk.
Shit.
“What does that mean?”
Staring at him, the anger grew quickly. I wanted to tell him what an asshole he was. How much I hated hearing him having sex with Mallory. How it had killed another part of my heart. How I wished it was me having sex with him behind that door. I wanted to say it all now that I had a captive audience.
So. I did. In Spanish. I blurted out how much it had hurt to hear him with his girlfriend. And how I didn’t think my heart could possibly hurt anymore, but walking back into his office had nearly destroyed me. How I wanted to scream his name out as he made me come over and over again. Damn him.
He sat there, watching me as I yelled in a language he didn’t know. A few times his body jerked, as if he knew the words I was screaming out to him. For a brief moment I pondered if he might have learned Spanish. My voice raised a few times…catching him off guard. When I had mentioned him making me come, I thought his eyes turned dark. But I knew I was only dreaming it.
I finished and dropped my face into my hands. I was emotionally exhausted.
With a knowing look, he simply said, “Please, Harley. I want to help you.”
I scoffed. I felt like I was defeated in more ways than one. “Tr
ipp, please. You’ve avoided me for years, no matter how many times I begged you to talk to me. Why I thought you would help me with a legal problem is beyond me. I panicked and you were the first person I thought to go to.”
He smiled.
Ugh. He actually had the nerve to smile.
“That’s because I’m the best lawyer in Oak Springs.”
Sitting back in my chair, I lifted a brow in contempt. “You’re the only lawyer in Oak Springs, Tripp. Sort of like me saying I’m the best vet in Oak Springs. It’s an esteemed honor, to say the least.”
His head tossed back as he let out sexy-as-hell laugh.
“I wish that were true, Harley. There are three other lawyers in town.”
Well…that was an interesting bit of information.
“That’s good to know,” I said. Crossing my arms over my chest, I watched as his gaze fell to my chest, then rose back up to my eyes. “I’ll be sure to look them up and reach out to them.”
The small chuckle that came out of his mouth was clearly a sign that he was not happy.
“That’s how you want to do this, then?”
Swallowing hard, I started wringing my hands. I wanted to cry out that, no, this wasn’t how I wanted to do this. I wanted to beg him to forgive me for walking away all those years ago. Tell him the truth about how I’ve been miserable ever since.
But I didn’t. I simply nodded.
Tripp nodded and stood. “Fine. Then I would contact Pete London. He’s a good lawyer.”
My heart dropped to the ground. He was giving up just like that. My chin trembled, and I felt the tears threatening to spill out. I wasn’t sure if he noticed my reaction; he didn’t falter at all.
“Good luck, Harley.”
I tried to respond, but I couldn’t. He started for the door, and I jumped up. Ready to spill the truth from my lips.
He opened the door and walked out, softly closing it behind him.
He left.
Sinking back into the chair, I covered my mouth to keep the sob in that wanted to bust free.
He left.
He truly doesn’t have any feelings for me at all.
With a spin of my chair, I turned and stared out the window.
I should never have come back to Oak Springs. It didn’t take very long for the tears to slip out and trail down my cheeks. Closing my eyes, I dropped my head against my chair and cried.
I cried so hard, the only thing I could hear was my heart pounding in my ears.
“Harley?”
Jumping up, I tripped over the chair and fell flat on my ass.
The pain in my lower back nearly made me sick to my stomach as I attempted to get up off the floor.
“Christ! Are you okay?”
Tripp lifted me up, and my head started to spin. My sadness mixed with the pain—and the excitement that came with him touching me. My world felt like it was tilting over, and there was nothing I could do to stop it. All the strength I’d used over the years to keep moving on was quickly fading away.
“I’m…fine. I’m f-fine,” I said between sobs.
“You’re not fine. Please tell me why you’re crying, Lee.”
His pet name for me nearly had me falling back to the floor. I hadn’t heard it in years and all the memories of us came flooding in.
My eyes lifted to his beautiful baby blues. I’d forgotten how blue they were. They reminded me of a summer sky after a heavy rain when everything gets washed away and you’re left with nothing but a crystal clear day.
“I never cheated on you. There was never another guy,” I blurted out. The moment the words left my lips, I wished I could take them back.
His grip on my arms got tighter.
“What?”
I closed my eyes for a brief second. “I didn’t want to tell you like this, Tripp. I’ve tried so many times to tell you the truth, but you’ve been pushing me away.”
Confusion washed over his face while his gaze searched mine for answers.
“What are you talking about?”
I tried to step out of his hold, but he held onto me.
“Let me go, Tripp.”
“Tell me what in the fuck you mean, Harley…now.”
Standing straighter, I pulled in a deep breath and attempted to steady my voice.
“Let. Go. Of. Me.”
His hands instantly dropped to his sides, but his voice stayed hard. “Talk. Now.”
I turned away and stared out the large window. All those years I had practiced how I wanted to tell him, and now I had nothing. My mind was completely blank.
“That day I told you I met someone? I lied.”
“Why?” his voice was laced with hurt and anger.
I faced him. “You were about to give up your dreams to help me chase mine, and I wasn’t going to let that happen.”
He stared at me like I’d lost my damn mind. “You fucking asked me to come with you! You asked me to leave Oak Springs. I told you I would.”
“I heard you talking to your father at the hospital! I heard what you said. You wouldn’t have been happy if you had left. It took me a while to realize I couldn’t allow you to follow me. For a few minutes I was going to let you. I had every intention of letting you leave Oak Springs because in my mind I thought we could have a few years of seeing the world together and then we’d moved back here. Start the life you wanted after we lived the life I wanted.”
He let out a confused chuckle. “And what the fuck happened? Your mind just switched like that and you decided you didn’t want me with you?”
“No!” I cried out. “I heard you tell your father you didn’t want to leave, that you were only doing it for me. When I heard him say you would resent me…I couldn’t bear the thought. I knew if I asked you about that conversation, you’d deny the possibility of ever resenting me.”
He started pacing before walking right up to me. He was so close I could practically hear his heart racing.
“So you decided to end us right then and there. You made that choice for both of us?”
Tears streamed down my face.
“I panicked, Tripp! Once I realized what I’d done, I wanted to take it back but it was too late. I tried calling you and came to town to talk to you…I planned on telling you the truth. I was going to move back to Oak Springs after vet school. I wanted to tell you how stupid I had been and beg you to forgive me, but you refused to even talk to me. For years I begged you and you constantly ignored me! It wasn’t something I wanted to leave on your goddamn voicemail.”
He shook his head. “I would think not. You fucking destroyed us, made my life a living hell for years! All because you panicked.”
“Your life? How do you think I’ve felt? I’ve had to live with the regret of walking away. At the time, I did what I thought was right. I knew the only way to keep you from following me was to lie about a guy. I stupidly thought I could explain it away later. That didn’t happen because you never gave me the chance. For Christ’s sake, Tripp, you were leaving town whenever you heard I was here! Did you even read the letter I sent you?”
He gave me a look of pure hate. I gasped at his expression and took a few steps back. He was beyond angry, and I didn’t blame him, but damn it, so was I.
“Who’s Al?”
My brows pinched together. “What?”
He pointed at me. “Don’t fucking lie to me anymore, Harley! Who the fuck is this guy Al you moved to Dallas with.”
It took me a few seconds before it hit me.
“Alison? I moved to Dallas with a girl named Alison. Her nickname was Al. We rented a two-bedroom loft apartment downtown until she started partying and getting into drugs. I kicked her out not long after we moved.”
Tripp stared at me as he processed what I was saying. All those years he had thought I moved to Dallas with a man? That explained the ignoring me, to some degree.
“Who told you I moved to Dallas with a guy?” I asked.
He raked his hand through his hair and paced aga
in. “It doesn’t matter. How could you have done this to us, Harley? I wouldn’t have regretted going with you.”
“Really? Can you honestly tell me that putting off starting your life and your career wouldn’t have made you a little resentful? I heard you telling your father you were only doing it for me. I couldn’t risk you hating me…or your family hating me for taking you away. I was young and caught up in stupid stories my aunt filled my head with. I did what I thought was right at the time. Can you honestly tell me you wouldn’t have regretted leaving in some way?”
“I don’t know! I never got the fucking chance to find out. So what if I had been? A few fights about it and we would have been good. You took that chance away from us and destroyed everything we ever had. What hurts more than anything is that you didn’t trust that my love for you—that our love—would’ve been enough.”
My gaze dropped to the floor. I couldn’t argue with him on that.
“I’ve lived with that knowledge since that day. From the moment I walked away from you, Tripp. It has torn my heart in two, and I don’t know what I can do to make it up to you.”
Something in him snapped and he punched the wall, causing his hand to go right through the drywall.
“Tripp!” I screamed.
I started to make my way to him, but he held up his hand.
“You can’t make it up to me. You can’t fix what you did. You lied to me, Harley. That’s almost worse than me thinking you cheated.”
I stood there, my entire body shaking.
He mumbled under his breath and started to the door.
“Tripp, wait.”
“I don’t have anything else to say to you, Harley.”
His words hit me like a brick wall and I stumbled back, wincing while the ache in my chest grew ten times stronger.
My body felt cold as I cried out.
“Tripp! Tripp, please don’t do this!”
The bell on the front chimed, sounding his departure.
My legs gave out, and I fell to the floor. Everything Tripp must have gone through when I left him coursed through my mind as my heart broke into a million more pieces. I never thought this situation could get any worse, but I was wrong.
Now I knew for a fact that the love of my life was gone forever.