She shook her head then reached up to cup his face. “Holden Carter. I am your mate,” she whimpered then looked over her shoulder at the humans who were studying them with avid curiosity. “Let me help.”
He cursed then kissed her forehead, knowing he couldn’t do more with so many prying eyes. She was just so fucking strong. She’d been thrust into this situation and was talking like a dominant Alpha. He couldn’t ask for anything more from her.
He’d hurt her with every brand, but she’d soothe his soul and he’d find a way to soothe hers. The humans had forced this on them, but he’d find a way to make his mate heal in all ways.
She’d already started with him, and he could never repay her. Despite the brevity of the situation, he wanted his mate, wanted the other half of his soul. And he’d found her.
Chapter 8
Ariel’s body ached. Not only did she still feel the remnants of the branding with Holden, but her wolf, or whatever it was, kept pushing at her. According to Holden, after most brandings, he was out of commission and in need of rest. She had no idea how he’d thought he’d be able to go on a hunt tonight after that.
But he didn’t need to think about that now. Apparently, her being mated to him and taken some of his pain and bled it into her. It might have hurt like hell, but it wasn’t as bad as the actual branding she’d faced. She’d have done anything to protect those children and Holden. For the first time since she’d woken up in this strange place, she felt as if she had a purpose.
She was Holden’s helpmate. The one he could lean on in times of strife.
And it felt damn good.
Now, though, would be another test of fate. Her first hunt. Soon she’d figure out how to shift into a wolf and know her new life was truly real and not a figment of a dream she’d never thought she’d have.
“We aren’t out in the wild, so we can’t hunt game or anything like that,” Holden said from behind her. She didn’t turn, instead inhaling his spicy scent as he wrapped his arms around her waist.
Things had changed that afternoon, and they both new it. She’d felt the connection between them and had taken as much pain from him as she could. She’d do it again in a heartbeat. They were a true mated pair even if she didn’t have the tattoo on her arm yet. That would come though, she knew. She wanted it. Her wolf wanted it. Holden wanted it.
“So we’re just going to run around in wolf form?” She never thought she’d say those words. Even though it scared her, she wanted to run, to shift. She wanted to let whatever was burning inside her to come out and be free.
Holden brushed her hair away from her shoulder and kissed the side of her neck. Shivers rocked her body. “It’s more than that. You’re letting your wolf out so she can breathe and run. You’ve felt the higher energy you have, even if you ache. You need to burn that before it turns to aggression or an anger you can’t control. Running allows that. We do it as a group because we’re not human. Running together brings forth our need to be a Pack and not be alone.”
She turned in his arms and wrapped hers around his waist. When she nuzzled into his chest and growled softly. “The nudity thing might be a problem.”
Holden didn’t laugh at her. Instead, he squeezed her once and laid a kiss on the top of her head. “We’re used to it since we’ve always had to shift. For now, you’ll strip down behind me, and only I will see you naked.” His eyes darkened and he let out another growl—this one louder, deeper. “I don’t want anyone to see you but me.”
“That kind of goes against the whole okay with nudity thing.”
“I’m a male with a mate. I don’t need to make sense.”
She rolled her eyes, feeling a bit more at ease. It was surprising how easily Holden did that to her, and she had a feeling he wasn’t aware of it. She hoped she did the same for him.
“So we’ll be at the edge or something?”
He nodded and patted her ass. Cheeky man. “Yes. Soren will be the closest to us.” He lowered his head and Ariel frowned.
“What?”
“He might catch a glimpse of you, but he’s already seen you without clothes when we first found you.”
She groaned at that. “Oh, good. Your best friend’s seen me naked.”
Holden snorted. “He couldn’t help it. And believe me. He wouldn’t do anything about it. Not only are you my mate, but…”
“What is it?”
“I don’t know everything, but I do know that Soren went through hell already when it came to a woman. I don’t think he’s going to want to mate again.”
“Again?” she asked, surprised that the broody man would have ever had a mate.”
Holden shook his head. “It’s not my story to tell. When he’s ready, he’ll talk to you about it. That is, if he’s ever ready.”
She sighed then kissed Holden’s chest. “I can understand that.” She let out a sigh. “I guess it’s time to go?”
“Yes. The moon is rising and I can feel your wolf, mate of mine. Let’s see what you look like after you shift.”
She swallowed hard. As much as she’d been thinking she could do this, fear still threatened to take over. She hadn’t actually seen anyone shift before. She’d only seen the videos the SAU had shown over the news when they wanted to scare the human population. Only she hadn’t known that was the case at the time.
Not only could she die tonight if the change didn’t take, but she’d see Holden as a wolf for the first time as well as so many others. It was a night of change, and hopefully, she’d be able to handle it all.
Holden cupped her face, his gaze serious. “It will all work out. Trust me.”
She turned and kissed his palm. “I trust you, Holden. That won’t ever be an issue.”
Something flashed over his eyes and he nodded. “Let’s go to the edge of the clearing, then. It’s time.”
He moved away and held out his hand. She placed hers in his, knowing this was another step toward a future she didn’t quite understand, but she knew was the best for her.
By the time they made it to the edge of the clearing where she’d shift, most of the Pack who would hunt that night had already gathered.
“We don’t shift as a group or hunt every week or even every month. But when we have a new member, a child who is now grown, we like to welcome them. You’ll need the strength of the Pack tonight, and we are here for you.”
She leaned into Holden’s embrace, her mind going in a thousand different directions. Men, women, and older teens stood in groups, laughing and talking to one another. She hadn’t seen much laughter within the den, and she liked seeing it now. They might have been forced into their roles in life, but they weren’t letting it take everything from their spirit. There was something to learn from that, and Ariel would do her best to take in the lesson.
Mandy came up to them with a smile on her face, though Ariel could sense the worry in her gaze. After all, Ariel could die tonight. It had been so long since anyone had changed a human that they weren’t sure if she’d survive. Not everyone did, and sometimes, the change just didn’t take.
Her hands shook as Mandy held open her arms. Ariel pulled away from Holden to hug the woman who had become her friend.
“You’re going to do great tonight,” Mandy declared, and Ariel snorted.
“Thanks for trying to keep me positive.”
Theo came up from behind Mandy and slid an arm around the submissive’s shoulders. Mandy relaxed in Theo’s hold, but Ariel wasn’t sure if it was a sexual and romantic gesture or one between friends. She had so much to learn about the Pack’s dynamics.
Her Pack’s dynamics.
Soren moved slowly toward them, his gaze on the perimeter rather than the wolves. “We need to get started. I don’t think the guards are going to venture in any time soon, but I don’t want to risk it.”
Holden nodded and gripped her hand. “I agree.” He let out a breath and she licked her lips, knowing it was time.
Holden threw back his head and howled. T
he sweet timbre echoed through her bones, sending waves of need of a different sort through her body. The others howled back, their voices a perfect harmony that brought tears to her eyes.
“To the hunt!” Holden yelled and the others howled once more. Before she could figure out how to join in, the others started stripping off their clothes. Ariel might not be a prude, but this was still a first for her.
Holden moved so his body shielded hers. “Mandy, Theo, turn your backs but shift near us.”
“You’ve got it, Alpha,” Theo said, his voice deeper than usual. The two of them quickly stripped off their clothes and went to all fours.
Holden tugged at the bottom of her shirt and she took a deep breath. “You’re going to strip down like them and then get on your hands and knees.” She blushed and he let out a rough chuckle. “We can do that soon, siren. First, though, I want to see your pretty wolf.”
She quickly took off her clothes and did her best not to look at Holden as he did the same. He’d told her wolves could smell arousal, and she didn’t want to swoon or something in front of the rest of the Pack.
When she got to her hands and knees, Holden kneeled beside her, his hand on her back. Again, she refused to look at him since one of her favorite parts of him was dangerously close to her face.
And enough about sex. This wasn’t the time for that.
“Close your eyes and think about the part of you that feels different than before. That edge that you haven’t been able to grasp in the past couple of weeks.”
She let out a breath and did as she was told. Deep inside, she had a new darkness, a new part of her she hadn’t been able to name.
“I want you to picture it as a rope or a thread. Once you do that, tug on it. It’s going to hurt, but keep tugging and let the newness wash over you.”
He kept his hand on her back and whispered words of encouragement to her, the deep timbre of his voice soothing her in a way she never thought possible. She pictured a rope she could grasp while the other end wrapped around the darkness. When she tugged, she groaned. It felt as if there were a hundred tiny needles dragging over her skin. She tugged again, wanting to see her wolf, wanting to be part of something far greater than herself. This time, the pain lashed at her, breaking bones, tearing at tendons. It reminded her of the torture at the hands of the doctors who had once sworn to care for her.
She screamed, her voice high and panicked.
In the distance, she could hear Holden shouting at her to keep going, to find him. She couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think. Her body broke out into a sweat and she screamed again.
Only this time, it wasn’t a scream.
It was a howl.
“Oh fuck, baby, you’re beautiful.” Holden ran his hands through her fur and she blinked up at him, her eyes finally not hazy.
She tried to speak, but a yip came out instead. Oh yeah, she was a wolf. A freaking shifter.
It had worked.
Holden lifted her muzzle, pride in his gaze. “You’re pure white wolf, siren. So gorgeous. It’s going to take you a minute to get your bearings, so I want you to stay where you are and try to get used to your new senses. I’m going to shift while you do, and then, we can run. Do you want that? Do you want to run?”
She rolled her eyes at him. Did he have to sound like he spoke to a dog?
He snorted then kissed her nose. “That came out wrong, but you know what I mean. You made it, baby. You’re a wolf.”
She didn’t cry, but her heart ached at the thought of what would have happened to Holden if she hadn’t made it through the shift. The pain had been horrible, but there had been a chance she wouldn’t have made it. Claire had said as much and has spoken of what would have happened to Holden. They wouldn’t have to deal with that now, thank God. He wouldn’t lose it now—wouldn’t lose her.
Holden kneeled in front of her and shifted, his process much more graceful than hers. In fact, every other wolf had shifted quicker and with less screaming—practically none. She knew that born shifters didn’t have as much of a problem with the change as those who had been bitten. The first change was also the hardest. Hopefully, soon it wouldn’t be as bad, and she wouldn’t want to vomit during it.
Holden finished changing and soon stood tall as a larger than normal, black wolf with an adorable white stripe down his nose. She’d have to tell him that once they were back in their human form. The big, bad Alpha was so stinking cute.
He nipped at her ear, and she had a feeling he’d read her thoughts in her gaze. Whatever. He was hers. He licked at her muzzle, cuddling her close before biting down on her neck. Her legs shook and she bowed her head, giving in to his dominance. They were wolves, pure and free in this form. It didn’t matter they still wore their collars, and they had walls around them. In this moment, they were free in their hearts and souls.
This was why they ran, why they hunted as they did.
Holden walked backwards in front of her and nodded his head. She took a step and fell on her face. Well then. Graceful she was not.
He huffed, but it didn’t sound like a laugh. Good for him. She stood up again, aware others were watching her. She was the Alpha’s mate, after all; they needed to see that she was strong and capable. Walking on her own four paws would probably go a long way in helping that.
This time she let her wolf forward, a gentle presence she’d known had been there but now could feel fully. Her wolf held a strength she hadn’t possessed before and the need to care for those under her charge.
Ariel would be able to do this with her wolf at her side. She knew it.
With her wolf’s help, she took a step then another. Holden let out a yip and licked her muzzle before turning on his heel. She followed him, gaining speed and confidence with each step. Soon the two of them were running in the forest, their paws digging into the soil. The others joined them, matching their pace but still giving them space.
She let her wolf roam, her soul feeling as though it had found another half she hadn’t known was missing. This was her new life, her new presence, her new destiny.
This was her.
She followed Holden, staying close so she could find her way. When they reached the top of the rise, Holden slowed and waited for the other wolves to join them. With the way the compound was situated, there wasn’t a lot of room to roam, but they at least had a place to gather. Holden stood the tallest with Ariel by his side. Soren stood on Holden’s other side while the rest of the wolves moved so they were in order of dominance circling them.
She’d been so afraid they’d push her away and reject her, but right then, those who had hunted that night did not shun her. Instead, they lowered their gazes—even Soren—conceding that she was the dominant female, the Alpha’s mate.
Pride and awe swelled deep inside, and she let out a howl. She hadn’t known she could make that sound, but it was instinct. The others joined her, Holden’s deep growl providing a perfect harmony to her melody. When they were through, the others slowly started to go their own way, either to go home or continue the run. Holden nipped at her flank then shot off toward the trees. She followed him without question, wanting her mate.
When they were finally alone, he turned to her and shifted back. He stood naked, sweaty, and erect, his heated gaze on hers.
“Shift back, siren.”
His voice sent shivers down her body and she closed her eyes to try and tug on that rope again. This time, when she did so, it didn’t hurt as much. Instead, it was a quick burst of pain before a blessed newness.
Before she could catch her breath, Holden crushed his mouth to hers, his taste heady. She raked her nails down his back, pressing her breasts against his chest.
She ripped her mouth from his, needing air. “I need you,” she panted.
“Fuck. You’re mine, Ariel. Anything you need. Anything you want. You got it. Let me fuck you hard tonight then we can make love in the moonlight. How does that sound?”
She reached between them and gripped his c
ock. “I think I like that idea. Anything I want, you say?” She pumped him once, twice and he groaned.
“Anything,” he bit out, his jaw tight.
She grinned then bent forward, taking him in her mouth. He growled, fisting his hand in her hair. When he tried to pull her back, she dug her nails into his hips and sucked hard.
“Fuck, Ariel. You don’t have to do this.”
She pulled back, releasing him with an audible pop. “You said I could do anything I want. I want this. I want you to come down my throat as I swallow you whole. Let me have this control, this part of you.”
He brushed her cheek with his thumb then pushed gently at her head. “Go for it. I love the sight of your lips wrapped around my cock.”
She hummed against him, licking up his shaft before squeezing the base. She rolled his balls in her hand while hollowing her cheeks, bobbing her head up and down. She loved the salty taste of him. When he groaned once more and his hand tightened in her hair, she relaxed her throat even as she kept her the motions going.
The first spurt of come splashed on her tongue and she swallowed. He threw his head back and howled, coming full-on down her throat, hot and heady. As soon as she swallowed the last drop, Holden had her pressed against his body, his tongue sliding across her lips.
She wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer. His cock hadn’t softened in the slightest and pressed hard into her belly.
“Want you,” he growled. “Inside. Now.”
He sounded more animal than man. All Alpha, and all hers. She tightened her arms around his neck and let out a gasp as he gripped her ass in both his hands, lifted her up then slammed her down on his cock.
They both froze a moment, his length filling her up so full she could barely breathe. He was still on his knees holding her up with his strength. Damn, he was so fucking sexy.
Before she could say a word, he slid her off his cock slowly so only the tip remained inside, teasing her.