The Niz smiled slyly. "There is no doubt of that," he said. "No doubt at all."
All they'd heard were rumors; of that I was sure. Their knowledge was incomplete. I got the strange impression that all these tribe leaders who'd played their part were counting on me for something. What?
I only went back to my room to sleep, the whole day having been spent with Ariaric and Elisyin. I envied their closeness. Sometimes, I forgot entirely who Ariaric had been. It was good to see him again though, the only person, apart from Zack perhaps, with whom I could reminisce about the bad old times. We had been lucky to escape with our lives. Even luckier to escape with our sanity. We had both changed since the days of the Uigenna; perhaps that was why I could forget our last meeting. It wasn't ignored though. We could say, "Oh, we were children then!" and laugh. If I could have looked into the future back then and foreseen this meeting, I would never have believed it. Panthera didn't come back to our room again that night. He obviously hadn't been there all day either; the place felt deserted. I tried not to feel anxious about it, telling myself there was no point, it was best this way, etc., etc. I drifted into a sleep crowded by neurotic dreams, in which the lovely Panthera played a very strong role.
I got out of bed early and shot to Ariaric's apartments for breakfast. I wasn't sure what time the Tigrina was expected, but I was going to make damn sure I was by the Archon's side when he arrived. Wonderful lurid fantasies paraded through my mind. The Tigrina knowing who I was immediately. A fantastic argument ensuing with me emerging triumphant, a defeated Tigrina accepting my victory and fading away to some far land. Me killing the Tigrina by poison so no-one could suspect me; him dying horribly in front of the entire court of Sykernesse. Such were the gist of my dreams. Obviously, I have never properly grown up. Ariaric had Elisyin with him; they were breaking their fast in bed together. I waited impatiently, only picking at the food Ariaric's servants set before me. By ten o'clock, the Archon and his consort emerged from the bedroom. I'd been frantically waiting for nearly an hour.
"Don't appear so eager," Ariaric said to me. "Knowing your history, I'm not sure whether it's a good idea to let you loose on the illustrious Tigrina ... I hope you won't betray my hospitality by misbehaving."
Caeru Meveny, consort to Pellaz-har-Aralis, Tigrina of Immanion arrived in time for lunch. To give the people of Oomadrah a fine spectacle, Ariaric had arranged for a lavish procession of horses, warriors and Niz to accompany this visiting dignitary from the south gate of the city to the palace. Ariaric and his court would wait upon a balcony on the outer wall of Sykernesse itself, too high up for the Tigrina to hear him say "hello," but of ample height for Ariaric and Elisyin to be shown off to their people. It would be good politics for the Tigrina to report the Maudrah's devotion to their Archon back to Immanion. Ariaric would use every opportunity to show how popular he was with them.
I couldn't see very much, having been hustled to the back of the balcony by jostling courtiers. It didn't matter. I wanted my first view of Caeru to be closer than this anyway. Hysterical cheering coming from the direction of the south wall presaged the arrival of the Gelaming party. It came closer and closer, an eery sound, almost like misery rather than joy. To me it sounded like a vast and moaning animal approaching Sykernesse from the south, getting louder and louder, until I had to fight an urge to run. Once the Tigrina was beneath the balcony, the voice of the city had become deafening. It was like a nightmare; all those repressed souls giving tongue, going mad. They weren't allowed to do that very often.
I backed away and descended the dark, stone stairs to the courtyard alone. It seemed deserted, with all noise coming from the city beyond. Only a few whispering servants around. Everyone was on the battlements and the balconies. I stood in the sunshine and watched as guards turned the wheels that opened the vast, wooden gates to the palace. Creaking, turning. They were rarely opened. Smaller doors within the gates themselves admitted daily traffic. First came the soldiers on horseback. The animals hadn't moved faster than a trot, I'm sure, yet they were sweating and snorting as if back from a gallop. This was backstage. Hara dismounting, laughing, calling to each other, lighting cigarettes, away from the public eye. Then came the Niz. They spoke together in low voices, drifting toward the main entrance in clumps. Now the courtyard was beginning to fill up with hara as the people of Syknernesse came down from the walls. I didn't want to be too prominent. I hung back.
The first of the Gelaming came in through the gates. Huge, white horses, not even faintly damp, gentle eyes sparkling with humor, manes as soft as harish hair. The riders wore thick leather armor, like insect carapaces, carrying their helmets on their saddles before them. These were hara chosen for their yellow hair, which they wore loose over their shoulders; the Tigrina's elite guard. All Arahal clones, I thought peevishly. Gelaming always make me feel inadequate. They seem so big. Tall, confident, beautiful and brilliant. Still, they fascinate me too. Must be a perversion on my part. The Tigrina came in surrounded by his aides. He looked so much smaller than I'd expected. Perhaps his horse was just larger than the rest. Apart from that, all that struck me was his incredible white-gold hair, ahuge mane that Ariaric would once have envied, as light and soft as feathers. I couldn't really see anything else. Ariaric and Elisyin descended from the balcony and the gates were closed upon the city. I watched as the Archon and his consort walked slowly up the wide steps to the palace with Caeru between them. They all looked as if they were very good friends. Caeru was skinny, I decided uncharitably. Small and skinny. I followed the party at a distance.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
Caeru
"He that can love unloved again, Hath better store of love than brain. "
—Sir Robert Ayton, To an Inconstant One
A banquet had been prepared in Caeru's honor on the second floor of Sykernesse. I had been lucky to secure a seat in the main hall because all the rooms were full to capacity. High-ranking hara from every Maudrah town appeared to have converged on Oomadrah for the day. I tried to see ! if Panthera was around but that was impossible. Sykernesse being so large, I could have walked round that crowd all day and not seen someone familiar. No-one could get near Ariaric or Elisyin, so that it was with relief that I spotted their youngest son Zobinek speaking to one of Elisyin's valets at the door to the main hall.
"Will I have difficulty getting in here?" I asked. "I believe your father did reserve me a seat."
"Not if you walk in with me," Zobinek replied cheerfully.
I felt it would give him considerable prestige in the eyes of his friends to walk into that room with someone like me on his arm. I'd done my best in the grooming department for most of the morning and the results were so stunning I barely recognized myself. (Would I have to preen myself like this every day if I lived in Almagabra?) Ariaric certainly had a sense of humor; he had me sitting right on the top table. I could have easily spat at the Tigrina and scored a direct hit. Zobinek sat beside me and pointed out the various personalities of interest.
"See him," he said, pointing discretely to a venomously glamorous Har further down the table. "That's Lissilma the Kalamah. He killed my brother Ostaroth."
"What! And he dines on the high table in Sykernesse!" I was amazed.
Zobinek nodded. "Yes. He was Ostaroth's consort. It's a long story, but my father didn't think Lissilma was much to blame."
"What does Elisyin think about it?"
Zobinek shrugged. "He can't dispute Ostaroth asked for it. He treated Lissilma abominably. Kalamah are like cats, you see. You can be tickling their stomachs one moment and it's all purrs, the next . . . psshht!" He clawed the air expressively. "It's best not to upset them."
All this was effectively taking my mind off the presence of Caeru, perhaps a deliberate ploy on Zobinek's part. He clearly fancied his chances with me. A well-worn circumstance. Give me a chimaera to pursue any day. Caeru appeared to be utterly at ease with the royal family of Maudrah. I could hear him laughing. We were served the first course;
spiced shellfish. Zobinek stopped talking so he could eat. The thought of food in my mouth repulsed me. I was thinking, "That creature is Pell's. He took my place," but even as I thought it, it didn't seem real. I had been told about the state of their blood-bond; it was ridiculous to feel jealous, except perhaps because Caeru had all the prestige and status that went with being Tigrina. Thiede had said he was good at his job. Could I have carried it off so well? I admit to vanity. Maybe I'd have enjoyed being fussed round, having people think I was important. At least I was being honest with myself now. I know I was staring; I wanted him to look at me. It took me nearly all the meal to get him to do it. He resisted my will, or he ignored it, but eventually, as Ariaric leaned back to speak to one of the servants, Caeru scanned the table and caught my eye. I have hardly ever experienced such a feeling of triumph, even as I realized how grossly I was overreacting to the whole situation. He looked puzzled. Perhaps he thought he knew me from somewhere. A brief, uncertain smile wavered upon his lips. He had an innocent kind of face, high-cheek-boned pretty, but wistful. I wished he could have been razor sharp like Cobweb, suave like Elisyin or recklessly carefree like Lahela. Just not this; haunted. I looked away and realized
Ariaric had been watching me for some moments. A wary expression. The Tigrina whispered in his ear. It had to be about me. Had to.
Later, Ariaric hosted a small (fifty hara) gathering in his personal suite on the third floor. Zobinek dragged me along, although I was no longer sure I wanted to go. I felt bruised. My journey must be resumed. I must forget this. For a moment, however brief, as I looked into his eyes, I had put myself in Caeru's place. I imagined the pain of fear, of loss. Such eyes as his expected it at any time. Yes, I actually felt guilty. Strange, isn't it. I told Zobinek that I had to find Panthera. "We are leaving soon," I said. "Oh, not yet, surely!" Zobinek replied. "Anyway, Panthera may well be there. You never know. Come on; let's enjoy ourselves!"
Ariaric's suite was a riot of loud conversation, smoke and laughter. Zobinek forced a drink on me. He had drunk rather too much himself. I was grateful that, because of the crush, I couldn't see the Tigrina at all. With a bit of shuffling, I managed to squeeze Zobinek up against the door, thinking that was the safest place to stand. He obviously misconstrued myintentions, but being a sybaritic creature. I've never objected to having my backside stroked, so it didn't really matter.
"You are like him in several ways," Zobinek said, with half-controlled slurring.
"Like who?" I humoured sweetly.
"The Tigrina."
"Oh?" I tried not to sound cold. "In what way? I'm ten foot taller than him surely, and at least twice as lovely!"
Zobinek laughed. "You may be right. It's just a feeling, and the hair of course."
"Same color. That makes us blood brothers does it?"
Ariaric's son grinned mischievously. "You want to meet him?"
"No. Do you?"
"I will. Later. Why don't you want to meet him? Aren't you curious?"
"Zobinek, I'm curious about ghouls, cannibals and people who believe they are werewolves, but I can't say I'd want to meet one. Just leave it!"
"You do really though, don't you?"
"Is this irrepressible youthfulness or just crass stupidity?"
"Neither; clairvoyance."
I rolled my eyes. "Don't be loathsome, Zobinek. Just get me another drink will you." He left me standing on my own for some minutes and then pushed his way back through the crowd, beaming happily. As far as I could see, he was not bringing me a drink. I sighed as he grabbed my arm. "The wine, witless child! Have you forgotten?"
He ignored my remark. "Come on!" he said, dragging me behind him, me still clutching an empty glass.
"Come on where?" I stumbled, bumping into people as he hauled me along. A drink splashed over my leg; somebody glared at me. Zobinek was relentless. I could see Ariaric standing with a group of Niz behind a vast sofa of black and gold brocade. Sitting on one end of the sofa were Elisyin and Caeru, with a cluster of hara around them who were all grinning like imbeciles.
"Zobinek!" I hissed. "Let me go!"
"You wanted to meet him, didn't you?" Ariaric's idiot son said happily. "I'll introduce you."
"No!" I hissed again. "No, Zobinek!"
"Don't be silly! Where are your guts?"
Somewhere in the back of my throat by the feel of it. This was going to be disastrous. I tried to escape but it was too late. Here was I, the beast who had relished the public humiliation of a certain Cobweb years before, struggling like a harling to escape an embarrassment that was far less harrowing really. Hara slid aside as we drew near to the couch, recognizing the Archon's son. It seemed as if I stood in the center of an arena.
"My lord Tigrina," Zobinek began. Caeru turned his startling, blue eyes upon us, smiling mildly. "May I present a good friend of my father's to you. He's been waiting to meet you." (Cringe). "This is Calanthe, formerly of Megalithica, currently of Jael in Ferike, I believe."
Credit where credit's due; the smile never dropped from the Tigrina's mouth, but his eyes told me he knew exactly who I was. He must have heard my name a thousand times. This was worse than the sick surprise I'd hoped to spring on Ariaric. I should imagine I must be about the last person that Caeru would want to bump into at a party. Whoever else in Immanion knew my every move, Caeru was not one of them.
He said icily, "How nice." A flush was creeping up his neck; the atmosphere was electric. Elisyin was looking daggers at his son.
"It is a privilege to meet you," I said, bowing slightly.
"For me too," the Tigrina replied, frost still hanging off his words. Elisyin decided
enough was enough.
"Cal's glass is empty Zobinek," he said, "Take him to get a refill."
Gratefully, I let an abashed Zobinek lead me away again. I drank two glasses of wine in quick succession before sneaking out of the room while Zobinek went to the toilet. My heart was pounding. I could have smoked a hundred cigarettes at once, but one would have to do. Shaking, I paused in the corridor to light up. I was shaking too much. Then a considerate hand offered me a flame, which I made use of before looking up. The fact that the flame was offered without the use of match or mechanical means of any kind should have warned me. It didn't. I was in too much of a state. A golden-haired har with silver eyes blew on his fingers and smiled. "My lord requests you attend an audience with him," he said. Caeru must have reacted the minute I turned my back on him. I shook my head. "No, I don't think so. Convey my apologies, but it would serve no purpose."
"My lord thinks otherwise," the Gelaming insisted. I avoided the penetrating gaze. "Now. If you would be so kind." He directed the way with his hand.
"I have no choice, do I?" "No. Sorry, but I have my orders."
Caeru's suite was the most splendid Sykernesse had to offer. Gifts from the Maudrah hierarchy were heaped on every available surface. I was left in the reception room to take all this in, while my escort went to tell the Tigrina I was there. He kept me waiting. I probably would have done the same. When he walked in, I wondered whether I'd been mistaken about his innocence. This was no melancholy victim. This was a har of stature who was plainly angry. He stood some distance away from me, hands on hip and demanded. "Well, was this planned?" "What do you mean?"
The Tigrina snorted and flung himself into a chair. "Sit down!" he ordered. "Omiel, leave us!" His aide left the room quickly. "What are you trying to do? You think it's clever, throwing yourself at me like that? Youthink the Archon's cronies haven't heard the rumors flying about this godforsaken country? I don't like being embarrassed ..."
What rumors?
"It wasn't planned," I interrupted him. "Just coincidence. At least on my part and your part." The implications in that only fueled his anger. He looked ready to explode. "I'm on my way east. Oomadrah was just a pause in the journey. I had no idea you'd be coming."
"Of course you didn't! Ariaric has some explaining to do, I can tell you!"
I couldn't r
eply, sure that whatever I said would only make things worse. Such restraint was doomed to be short-lived, I'm afraid. Caeru saw to that with his next remark. "Don't think whatever plans you and Thiede have hatched together can ever be successful," he said.
"Excuse me! There aren't any!"
The Tigrina sneered. "Oh yes. I've heard all about your lies! I'm not stupid. Recently, yours is the name I'm constantly hearing on everybody's tongue just as I walk into any room. The name I hear before whoever's talking sees me and changes the subject, I might add."
"That's just as much a surprise to me as it is to you, I assure you."
"Is it? Well, as a matter of fact, it isn't a surprise to me. What is it you want? Wealth?"
I had to laugh at that. "That's the most pathetic thing anyone could ever say to me! Do I want wealth. Are you mad? I think we both know what I want." I regretted that even as I was half-way through saying it. The Tigrina's face had bleached from red to white. "I could have you killed," he said.