PROLOGUE
San Diego, California
Nine years ago
Dax Spencer peered down over the elegant reception and wondered where the time had gone. Wasn’t it just yesterday that he and his friends were attending Creighton Academy, where their biggest worry was passing calculus and sneaking out to the girls’ school down the road?
Now Zack, one of his pack, was married. In fact, Zack was the first to fall on the matrimonial sword. He was also a senator about to make a run for the White House, but somehow the idea of Scooter being a husband seemed weirder.
And the political world had come to watch the nuptials. People magazine had even sent a photographer. The wedding was the bash of the year for America’s elite and had all the pomp of a royal affair, complete with a few foreign dignitaries who had come hedging their bets that Zack and Joy Hayes would one day occupy the White House.
Dax nodded as Connor Sparks and Gabe Bond approached, drinks in hand. In the distance he could see his own parents among the crowd lining the dance floor. A simple glance proved this was the wedding of a Naval daughter, since the place was a sea of dress whites.
“I can’t believe he really tied the knot.” Connor, his best friend, put a hand on his shoulder as they watched the bride and groom begin their first dance.
Dax was sure they all felt that way. “After the year they spent planning this shindig, I think Joy’s parents would have had Zack’s head if he hadn’t gone through with it.”
“True.” Connor smirked. “I hope he’ll be happy. I like Joy but I worry she’s too . . . I don’t know, nice for Zack.”
Gabe sighed. “Yeah. I would have thought he’d want someone with a little more attitude.”
“To survive Zack’s future, she’ll definitely need backbone.” Campaigning and politics seemed like a nasty business to Dax. Zack’s senatorial campaign had been peppered with negativity about everything from his youth to his family ties. How would Joy weather the media scrutiny on a larger scale?
“Bitchiness would even be better, though that word will probably get me slapped,” Connor said with a chuckle. “But yeah, I worry she’s a bit fragile.”
“Joy is the perfect first lady—pretty, gracious, kind. She’ll be a true benefit to him politically,” Gabe said. “I guess I wanted something more for him.”
“He’s been with her for two years. He seems happy.” At least Dax hoped he was. Since the day he’d met Zack Hayes, when they’d been gangly, pimply-faced kids, Zack had been on a path, one his father had set for him long ago.
Dax couldn’t exactly complain. His own father had set a path for him as well. Spencer sons went into the Navy. There had been a Spencer in every war fought since the Revolution. Only days before, he’d been promoted. He would become captain of his own ship in the next few years and eventually follow in his father’s footsteps to become an admiral. Dax saw his path clearly—and he couldn’t wait.
Then why did he feel so restless? There were at least a hundred gorgeous women roaming the reception. The likelihood of him getting lucky tonight was supremely high.
Yet Dax only sought one woman.
“You seem anxious tonight. What’s up with you?” Connor tipped back his beer.
“You seem to know everything, Mr. Spy,” he shot back. His best friend worked for the Central Intelligence Agency as an analyst. It fit Connor actually. He’d always been good at chess and strategy.
Connor rolled his eyes. “You know it’s really more boring than you would think. And I don’t have to be a spy to know that you’re looking for one pretty blond law enforcement officer. Tell me something, has she shown you her handcuffs?”
No, she hadn’t shown him anything at all. Holland Kirk was proving damned elusive. Her father was a Naval officer stationed here in San Diego under Dax’s own dad. He’d met her shortly after Joy and Zack started dating. Zack had invited him over to meet some of Joy’s college friends and Dax hadn’t been able to take his eyes off the beauty.
The admiration was not mutual. Holland Kirk had been perfectly pleasant with him on every occasion they’d met. They had intelligent conversation, spent fun times together in groups, and enjoyed each other’s company. But she’d turned him down flat every time he asked her out. She would smile politely and murmur some excuse before she turned the conversation to something she obviously found more pleasant.
“She’s not interested.” And that hurt. Besides being gorgeous, Holland was smart and funny. He’d never been so into a woman. They had chemistry. Heat. Well, he’d thought they had.
“Oh, she’s interested. But I think your reputation has preceded you. Or maybe all of our reputations. I overheard her talking to Joy about how brave she was to be marrying into scandal central.” Connor shrugged. “But we haven’t had any scandals lately.”
“We also haven’t been choir boys.” Gabe winced. “I got caught boning one of the Swedish princesses at that UN reception. In my own defense, she swore that broom closet was locked.”
Dax remembered the episode fondly. “You looked good in those tabloid pics, bro. You’ve really kept up the ab routine. But seriously, we’ve all matured. I don’t think that Vanity Fair article chronicling our love lives was really fair.”
“Sexcapades,” Gabe corrected. “It was a massive article detailing our sexcapades, complete with a detailed relationship map that proves we’re all six sexual degrees away from Kevin Bacon. I blame Mad. He slept with the entire cast of that Little Women remake.”
“C’mon, wasn’t that fluff piece more tongue-in-cheek?” Dax argued hopefully.
“They managed to keep me out of it but, you guys . . . that was a double foldout.” Connor sighed. “Which is probably enough to make any woman think twice. Well, any sane one. Especially someone like Holland. She’s being recruited for NCIS. Another thing I heard her talking to Joy about.”
Connor apparently listened in a lot. Dax looked over the dance floor again. He’d caught glimpses of Holland during the ceremony, but he hadn’t seen her since. Instead, he’d been playing the good groomsman, ensuring all the parents were happy and comfortable. They’d all come except Connor’s mother. In that respect, not much had changed since their Creighton days.
He needed to show Holland that he’d matured. Yes, he’d had a somewhat salacious youth, but he was older now. Even his friends were starting to settle down. Except Gabe, who was still screwing every princess, model, or Hollywood starlet he could. And Mad, who would apparently do any woman with a skirt and a pulse.
But he, Connor, and Roman were discerning and mature. Mostly.
Damn, he wanted to dance with Holland, see if he could talk to her. “Even if she takes an NCIS job, she wouldn’t be under my command. She’s not enlisted so there’s no problem. You really think she’s turned off by the fact that I’ve dated a lot?”
“I think she’s turned off by your status as a major manwhore,” Gabe offered helpfully.
“Oooo, are we talking about who I think we are?” Maddox Crawford sauntered over with a smile. He’d already ditched his bow tie and looked as if he’d found the Scotch. He was carrying a crystal decanter of booze and several glasses. Mad was the very picture of decadence. “Because that girl is hot. That fine ass of hers nearly made the front seat of the Bentley smoke when I picked her up earlier.”
Dax froze. “You picked her up?”
Mad flashed him a grin full of teeth. “She’s my date.”
Connor shook his head. “Yeah, we weren’t going to tell him that.”
Dax had never actually seen red before, but a dark swath of crimson coated his vision now.
“Uh, Dax, I was joking.” Mad stepped back, his eyes wide. “She needed a
ride. That’s all. Joy wanted her here early, so Zack called me. Dude, you look like you’re about to kill someone and I’m a little afraid it’s me.”
Dax took a deep breath. For a moment, he’d actually seen himself murdering one of his best friends over a woman, so maybe he had to accept that, to him, she was more. “If you touch her . . .”
Mad nodded. “I’ll die a really horrible death. Got it. You called dibs. I respect the dibs, man. I also did you a solid. She’s waiting downstairs in the lounge. I told her I had to talk to her about something important.”
The red haze was threatening to come back. “Why were you trying to get her alone?”
“For you, buddy. All for you. Why do you think I’m up here while she’s slipping into the library down there?” He pointed vaguely over the landing, to the first level below.
But Holland had agreed to meet Mad alone. That sat bitter in his gut. “She wants you.”
Gabe snorted. “Dax, I heard her call Mad a festering disease pit on two legs.”
“Walking syphilis is how I heard it,” Connor added.
Mad nodded. “Actually, she called me stuff even worse. So go down there and talk to her. I made you look good earlier today. Mostly by making myself look like a complete shit. It’s easy. I’ve got a lot of ammo in that gun, if you know what I mean. Gabe, my man, I’ve lined up twins for us. I’m going to warn you. They’re very open minded and free spirited, and their father might have access to nuclear weapons so if we have to run, we’re going to have to be fast.”
“I’m totally in.” Gabe grinned as he took a glass and looked down at the wedding. “God, I’m never getting married.”
“For the right woman, I might consider it.” Dax smiled in anticipation, then headed down the stairs before the elusive Holland could slip away again.
One shot. That’s all he really had. If he couldn’t convince her that he wasn’t the same sort of skirt chaser as Mad or Gabe, she might cut him cold for good.
He headed for the library and eased the door open, stepping inside. Clearly, the room belonged to Joy’s father. It was a masculine space and filled from floor to ceiling with books. The room was stunning, but nothing made his breath catch like the woman standing in the center.
The late afternoon light streamed through the windows, catching her honey-blond hair until it glowed. Her very tasteful bridesmaid dress showed off the curve of her breasts and her slender waist. Holland was fit and graceful and steely on the outside. But something about her seemed delicate under the surface. That vulnerability called to the protector in him.
At the sound of his footsteps, she turned. Her lips curled up in a wry grin. “So Mad betrayed me. Big shock. I should have known he didn’t have a huge surprise planned for Zack and Joy that he needed my help with.”
Dax closed the door behind him. Even though nerves attacked him like a swarm of buzzing bees, simply being alone with her calmed something inside him. He’d never realized how restless he felt until he’d met this woman.
He sent her a smile. “I wouldn’t say that. I’m almost certain he changed out the cans we tied to the limo for good luck with neon butt plugs. Luckily, Roman usually manages to clean up everything Mad defiles. Seriously, Roman even hired a man to seek and destroy all of the ‘adult’ presents Mad snuck into the gifts.”
An actual smile crossed her face and she lit up the room. “He’s an interesting friend. I think the press is going to love him on the campaign trail.”
“Oh, Roman has protocols in place for that, too,” Dax admitted. “Mad is not allowed in the same state where Zack is campaigning. If he comes too close, Gabe will kidnap Mad and they’ll hunt up a pair of supermodels. Win-win. Do you think Zack and Joy will really do it?”
This was a safe topic. Politics normally wasn’t, but he wasn’t discussing political opinions, just their friends.
Holland glanced toward the window. “You mean run for the White House? Oh, I think that’s a given. I wish they wouldn’t. I don’t know how that particular scrutiny makes anyone happy. I love Joy. Hell, I love Zack. He’s an amazing man, which is why I worry about both of them in that den of snakes slithering around D.C.”
“Zack is more ruthless than you know. He was bred for this and he’ll protect Joy. Roman will, too. He seems to really like her, which is a feat since Roman doesn’t like many people. I swear, we’ll all do our best to watch out for her.”
“I’m sure she’ll appreciate it.” Holland sighed. “Well, I should get back to the reception.”
God, his one chance was slipping through his fingers. “Why are you afraid to be alone with me?”
She arched an elegant brow over her blue eyes. “Commander, I could take you in a fight. I’m not afraid of you.”
There it was, that crackling energy he felt every time she challenged him. It made his heart speed up, his head buzz, his dick get hard. He always felt this heady desire around her. “I don’t want to fight with you, Holland. I just want to talk. I want to understand why you won’t go out with me. I’m going to lay it on the line here and now. I’m crazy about you.”
She hesitated. “I like you, too, Dax. I won’t lie and say I’m not attracted to you, but we can’t work.”
“What do you mean? I’m not asking for a commitment, just dinner. Maybe a movie. I want to spend time with you.”
Holland shook her head and brushed past him to open the door. Dax scrambled back and blocked her.
She sighed at him. “Look, your lifestyle is not one I would choose.”
“What lifestyle? I’m a sailor. I know you’ve heard some crazy stories about me, but they’re not true.”
That judgmental brow rose again. “Really? So you didn’t nearly cause an international incident because you slept with the daughter of a South American dictator.”
The things he did in Vegas. “I didn’t know who she was, but I was also twenty-three at the time and I didn’t really care. Besides, that whole thing was really exaggerated by the press.”
“Sure it was. Spencer, I’m the daughter of an enlisted man. The rest of my family are cops. I’m blue collar. You’re American royalty.”
“Do you know what I like about the Navy? I’m not royalty there. No one gives a crap that my family has money. No one cares what my last name is. I work hard and I’ll continue to do so.”
“You’re naive if you think your last name doesn’t open doors,” she said almost sadly. “I admit I’m attracted. Absolutely one hundred percent drawn to you. I also really crave chocolate. That doesn’t mean I’m going to indulge.”
She didn’t wait for his reply, just shouldered her way past him. If he let her leave now, Dax feared he wouldn’t get another chance. He couldn’t let her walk out the door without a fight.
Dax wrapped gentle but firm fingers around her wrist. “So you’ll never even try a taste?”
She looked down at her wrist until he released her, holding up his hands. “I’m fairly sure that a taste will only make me want more. Besides, I’m leaving San Diego in a few weeks. NCIS made me an offer, so I’ll be working in New Orleans. I still have family there. Since my father passed, I’ve decided I’d like to be with them.”
New Orleans. His family lived in New Orleans. “Give me a chance. Kiss me once and see if you can walk away, because I don’t think I’ll be able to. Distance doesn’t mean anything if two people want to be together. Give me a shot to prove I’m not the man you think I am.”
They stood so close and yet weren’t touching at all. Still, he could practically feel her skin against his.
Holland looked torn. “I don’t want to be another conquest for you.”
That was easy. Honesty, in this case, was definitely his friend. “I haven’t slept with anyone in almost a year. I’ve been on assignment. Then I met you. I had a colorful youth; I won’t deny that. But now I want something more, something deeper. The man you’ve read about, he isn’t real. I am. Kiss me and let me show you.”
>
God, he wanted to. Ached to. He wished like hell he could wrap his arms around her and show her everything he had to offer, but rushing her would be a mistake. He had to wait for Holland. Whatever happened between them needed be her choice.
She hesitated and for a moment, Dax thought she would leave for good. She met his stare as though taking his measure. After a moment’s silent perusal, she stepped closer, her skirt gently swishing against her graceful legs, bringing her so near. His heart revved.
She skimmed her fingertips along his jawline. “You want me to kiss you, Commander? That might be dangerous.”
He knew it was, because there was no way they’d end up in bed tonight. Dax would be in a world of hurt no matter which way this went. He was startled to realize he didn’t want to be just another conquest for her, either.
“It could be,” he admitted. “I’m willing to take the chance. I know you won’t believe me, but I like you. Really like you. I enjoy talking to you, being around you, hearing you laugh. I’m not looking for a one-night stand or some easy hookup. I’m pretty sure I’m looking for something more.”
She stared at him as if she tried to memorize his face. An