Nonsense, I told myself. You’ve sat in on these meetings dozens of times. You’ve almost always thought the same things Dad has said. Yes, this is your first time leading it, but this was always waiting for you. And no one is going to be hard on you today, for goodness’ sake; your mother just had a heart attack.
I pulled the door open with purpose, General Leger trailing behind me. I made sure to nod at the gentlemen as I passed. Sir Andrews, Sir Coddly, Mr. Rasmus, and a handful of other men I’d known for years sat arranging their pens and paper. Lady Brice looked proud as she watched me sweep around to my father’s spot, as did the general when he settled into the place beside her.
“Good morning.” I took my seat at the head of the table, gazing down at the thin folder in front of me. Thank goodness the agenda looked light today.
“How is your mother?” Lady Brice asked solemnly.
I should have written this answer on a sign so I could stop repeating it. “She’s asleep still. I’m not sure how serious her condition is at the moment, but Dad is staying by her side, and we’ll be sure to update everyone if there’s any change.”
Lady Brice smiled sadly. “I’m sure she’ll be fine. She always was a tough one.”
I tried to hide my surprise, but I didn’t realize Lady Brice knew my mother that well. In truth, I didn’t know that much about Lady Brice myself, but her tone was so sincere, I was happy to have her beside me at the moment.
I nodded. “Let’s get through this so I can tell her my first day on the job was at least slightly productive.”
There were gentle chuckles around the room at that, but my smile quickly faded as I read the first page presented to me.
“I hope this is a joke,” I said dryly.
“No, Your Highness.”
I turned my eyes to Sir Coddly.
“We feel this was a deliberate move to debilitate Illéa, and seeing as neither the king nor queen gave their consent, France has essentially stolen your brother. This marriage is treasonous, so we have no choice but to go to war.”
“Sir, I assure you, this was not treasonous. Camille is a sensible girl.” I rolled my eyes, hating to admit it. “It’s Ahren who’s the romantic one, and I feel certain he urged her into this, not the other way around.”
I balled up the declaration of war, unwilling to consider it for another moment.
“My lady, you cannot do that,” Sir Andrew insisted. “The relations between Illéa and France have been tense for years.”
“That is more on a personal level than a political one,” Lady Brice offered.
Sir Coddly waved his hand in the air. “Which makes this all much worse. Queen Daphne is brandishing more emotional suffering on the royal family under the assumption that we will not respond. This time we must. Tell her, general!”
Lady Brice shook her head in frustration as General Leger spoke. “All I will say, Your Highness, is that we can have troops in the sky and on the ground within twenty-four hours if you command it. Though I certainly wouldn’t advise you to make that command.”
Andrews huffed. “Leger, tell her the dangers she’s facing.”
He shrugged. “I see no danger here. Her brother got married.”
“If anything,” I questioned, “shouldn’t a wedding bring our two countries closer? Isn’t that why princesses were married off for years?”
“But those were planned,” Coddly stated in a tone that implied I was a little too naive for the conversation at hand.
“As was this,” I countered. “We all knew Ahren and Camille would wed one day. It simply happened sooner than expected.”
“She doesn’t get it,” he muttered to Andrews.
Sir Andrews shook his head at me. “Your Highness, this is treason.”
“Sir, this is love.”
Coddly slammed a fist on the table. “No one will take you seriously if you do not act decisively.”
There was a beat of silence after his voice stopped echoing around the room, and the entire table sat motionless.
“Fine,” I responded calmly. “You’re fired.”
Coddly laughed, looking at the other gentlemen at the table. “You can’t fire me, Your Highness.”
I tilted my head, staring at him. “I assure you, I can. There’s no one here who outranks me at the moment, and you are easily replaceable.”
Though she tried to be discreet, I saw Lady Brice purse her lips together, clearly determined not to laugh. Yes, I definitely had an ally in her.
“You need to fight!” he insisted.
“No,” I answered firmly. “A war would add unnecessary strain to an already stressful moment and would cause an upheaval between us and the country we are now bound to by marriage. We will not fight.”
Coddly lowered his chin and squinted. “Don’t you think you’re being too emotional about this?”
I stood, my chair screeching behind me as I moved. “I’m going to assume that you aren’t implying by that statement that I’m actually being too female about this. Because, yes, I am emotional.”
I strode around the opposite side of the table, my eyes trained on Coddly. “My mother is in a bed with tubes down her throat, my twin is now on a different continent, and my father is holding himself together by a thread.”
Stopping across from him, I continued. “I have two younger brothers to keep calm in the wake of all this, a country to run, and six boys downstairs waiting for me to offer one of them my hand.” Coddly swallowed, and I felt only the tiniest bit of guilt for the satisfaction it brought me. “So, yes, I am emotional right now. Anyone in my position with a soul would be. And you, sir, are an idiot. How dare you try to force my hand on something so monumental on the grounds of something so small? For all intents and purposes, I am queen, and you will not coerce me into anything.”
I walked back to the head of the table. “Officer Leger?”
“Yes, Your Highness?”
“Is there anything on this agenda that can’t wait until tomorrow?”
“No, Your Highness.”
“Good. You’re all dismissed. And I suggest you all remember who’s in charge here before we meet again.”
As soon as I finished speaking, everyone other than Lady Brice and General Leger rose and bowed—rather deeply, I noted.
“You were wonderful, Your Highness,” Lady Brice insisted once the three of us were alone.
“I was? Look at my hand.” I held it up.
“You’re trembling.”
I pulled my fingers into a fist, determined to stop shaking. “Everything I said was true, right? They can’t force me to sign a declaration of war, can they?”
“No,” General Leger assured me. “As you know, there have always been a few members of the board who have thought we should colonize in Europe. I think they saw this as an opportunity to take advantage of your limited experience, but you did everything right.”
“Dad wouldn’t want to go to war. The banner of his reign has been peace.”
“Exactly.” General Leger smiled. “He’d be proud of how you stood your ground. In fact, I think I might just go tell him.”
“Should I go, too?” I asked, suddenly desperate to hear the little monitor announcing that Mom’s heart was still there, still trying.
“You have a country to run. I’ll bring you an update as soon as I can.”
“Thank you,” I called as he exited the room.
Lady Brice crossed her arms on the table. “Feeling better?”
I shook my head. “I knew this role would be a lot of work. I’ve done my share of it and watched my dad do ten times what I did. But I was supposed to have more time to get ready. To start the job now, because my mom might die, is too much. And within five minutes of being responsible, I have to make a decision about war? I’m not prepared for this.”
“Okay, first things first. You don’t have to be perfect yet. This is temporary. Your mom will get better, your dad will come back to work, and you will go back to learning with this grea
t experience under your belt. Think of this time as an opportunity.”
I let out a long breath. Temporary. Opportunity. Okay.
“Besides, it’s not all completely up to you. This is what your advisers are for. Granted, they weren’t much help today, but we’re here so you aren’t navigating without a map.”
I bit my lip, thinking. “Okay. So, what do I do now?”
“First, follow through and fire Coddly. It will show the others you mean what you say. I do feel somewhat bad for him, but I think your father only kept him around to play devil’s advocate and help him see all sides of an issue. Trust me, he won’t be sorely missed,” she confessed dryly. “Second, consider this time a period of hands-on training for your reign. Start surrounding yourself with people you know you can trust.”
I sighed. “I feel like they’ve all just left me.”
She shook her head. “Look closer. You probably have friends in places you never expected.”
Again, I found myself seeing her in a new light. She’d stayed in her role longer than anyone; she knew what Dad would decide in most situations; and she was, at the very least, another woman in the room.
Lady Brice stared into my eyes, forcing me to focus. “Who do you know will always be honest with you? Who will be by your side, not because you’re royal, but because you’re you?”
I smiled, absolutely positive of where I was going once I left this room.
CHAPTER 3
“ME?”
“You.”
“Are you sure?”
I grabbed Neena by the shoulders. “You always tell me the truth, even if I’m not excited to hear it. You’ve put up with the worst of me, and you’re too clever to spend your days folding my laundry.”
She beamed, blinking to quell her tears. “A lady-in-waiting . . . what does that even mean?”
“Well, it’s a mix of being a companion, which you already are, and then helping with the less glamorous side of my job, like scheduling appointments and making sure I remember to eat.”
“I think I can handle that,” she said, smiling.
“Oh, oh, oh, and”—I held up my hands, preparing her for probably the most exciting part of the job—“it means you don’t have to wear that uniform anymore. So go change.”
Neena chuckled. “I don’t know that I have anything appropriate. But I’ll make sure to get something together for tomorrow.”
“Nonsense. Just go through my closet.”
She gaped at me. “I can’t.”
“Umm, you can and you must.” I pointed to the wide doors. “Get dressed, meet me in the office, and we’ll make it through whatever comes one day at a time.”
She nodded, and, as if we’d done it a thousand times, she threw her arms around me.
“Thank you.”
“Thank you,” I insisted.
“I won’t let you down.”
I pulled back, watching her. “I know. By the way, your first job is to pick a new maid for me.”
“Not a problem.”
“Excellent. I’ll see you soon.”
I swept from the room, feeling better knowing I had people on my side. General Leger would be my line to Mom and Dad, Lady Brice would be my chief adviser, and Neena would help me shoulder the workload.
It had been less than a day, and I already understood why Mom thought I’d need a partner. And I still intended to find one. I just needed a little time to figure out how.
That afternoon I paced worriedly as I waited for Kile outside the Men’s Parlor. Of all my relationships with the Selected, ours felt the most complicated and yet the easiest place to start.
“Hey,” he said, coming to embrace me. I couldn’t help smiling thinking about how if he’d tried that a month ago, I’d have called the guards on him. “How are you doing?”
I paused. “It’s funny—you’re the only one who’s asked.” We stepped apart. “I’m okay, I think. At least I am as long as I’m busy. The second things slow down, I’m a ball of nerves. Dad’s a wreck. And it’s killing me that Ahren hasn’t come back. I thought he would for Mom, but he hasn’t even called. Shouldn’t he at least have done that?”
I swallowed, knowing I was getting too worked up.
Kile took my hand. “Okay, let’s think about this. He flew to France and got married in one day. There has to be a ton of official paperwork and other stuff to sort through. And there’s a chance he hasn’t even heard what happened.”
I nodded. “You’re right. And I know he cares. He left me a letter, and it was too honest for me to question that.”
“See, there you go. And last night your dad looked like he was two seconds away from needing to be checked into the hospital wing himself. Being with your mom and monitoring her probably gives him a feeling of control when there’s absolutely none. She’s made it through the worst, and she’s always been a fighter. Remember when that one ambassador came?”
I smirked. “You mean the one from the Paraguay-Argentina Union?”
“Yes!” he exclaimed. “I can still picture it perfectly. He was so rude to everyone, falling down drunk by noon two days in a row, and your mom finally grabbed him by the ear and dragged him out the front door.”
I shook my head. “I do. I also remember the endless phone calls afterward trying to smooth things over with their president.”
Kile brushed that detail away. “Forget that. Just remember, your mother doesn’t let things happen to her. When something tries to ruin her life, she drags it into the street.”
I smiled. “True.”
We stood there, quiet for a moment, and it was pleasant and still. I’d never been so grateful. “I’m busy the rest of today, but maybe we could spend some time together tomorrow night?”
He nodded. “Of course.”
“There’s a lot to talk about.”
His eyebrows knit together. “Like what?”
We both turned at the same time, noting the figure in our periphery.
“Excuse me, Your Highness,” the guard said with a bow, “but you have a visitor.”
“A visitor?”
He nodded, giving me no information as to who it might be.
I sighed. “Fine. I’ll get in touch later, okay?”
Kile gave my hand a quick squeeze. “Sure. Let me know if you need anything.”
I smiled as I left him, knowing that he meant that. In the back of my mind, I felt certain all the young men in that room would rush to my side if I needed them to, and that was a small silver lining on an otherwise dreary day.
I rounded the stairs, trying to guess at who was here. If it had been family, they’d have been brought to a room; and if it was a governor or some other official visitor, they’d have sent up a card. Who was so important that they couldn’t even be announced?
As I descended to the first floor, the answer to my question stood there, his bright smile making my breath catch.
Marid Illéa hadn’t set foot in the palace in years. The last time I’d laid eyes on him, he was a gangly preteen who hadn’t quite mastered conventional conversation. But his round cheeks had turned into a jaw line sharp enough to cut, and his stringy limbs had filled out, hitting the seams of his suit with perfect precision. He held my gaze as I approached, and even though his hands were full with an overflowing basket, he bowed and smiled as if he was completely unencumbered.
“Your Highness,” he said. “I’m sorry to come unannounced, but as soon as we heard about your mother, we felt we had to do something. So . . .”
He held out the basket toward me. It was full of gifts. Flowers, thin books, jars of soup with ribbons around the lids, and even a few bakery items that looked so good it was hard not to take one for myself.
“Marid,” I said, a greeting, a question, and an admonition all at once. “This is above and beyond, all things considered.”
He shrugged. “Disagreements don’t mean a loss of compassion. Our queen is sick, and this was the least we could do.”
I smiled, mo
ved by his sudden appearance. I motioned to a guard.
“Take this to the hospital wing, please.”
He took the gift basket, and I turned my focus back to Marid.
“Your parents didn’t want to come?”
He shoved his hands into his pockets and grimaced. “They were afraid the visit would seem more political than personal.”
I nodded. “Understandable. But please tell them not to worry about that in the future. They’re still welcome here.”
Marid sighed. “They didn’t think so, not after their . . . exit.”
I pressed my lips together, remembering it all so clearly.
August Illéa and my father had worked together closely after my grandparents died, trying to dissolve the castes as quickly as they could. When August complained that change wasn’t happening fast enough, Dad pulled rank and told him to respect his plan. When Dad couldn’t quite erase the stigma of being in the lower castes, August said he needed to get his “spoiled ass” out of the palace and into the streets. Dad had always been a patient man, and, from what I remembered of August, he was always on edge. In the end there was a big fight, and August and Georgia packed their things, including their bashful son, and left in a hurricane of hurt and anger.
I’d heard Marid’s voice once or twice on the radio since then, giving political commentary or business advice, but it was strange now, having that voice sync up to the movements of his lips and seeing him smile so easily when I mostly remembered him slouched over himself when he was younger.
“Honestly, I don’t understand why our fathers haven’t spoken recently. You’ve certainly seen the issues with the post-caste discrimination we’ve been trying to quell. I thought one of them might break and seek out the other. It’s past being a point of pride anymore.”
Marid extended an arm. “Perhaps we could walk and talk?”
I linked my arm through his, and we began moving down the hall.
“How is it going so far?”
I shrugged. “As best it can under the circumstances.”
“I’d like to tell you to look on the bright side, but it might be hard to find one.”
“So far, all I can think of is that I’m helping my parents.”