Page 3 of Beowulf is Back

Naiman was still in attendance an hour later when the Duke’s announced visitor arrived. Cardinal Nathaniel Bull strode complacently into the Duke’s Hall and only momentarily paused to allow the Duke to acknowledge him with a nod before seating his great bulk on the visitor’s chair. He stared arrogantly up at the Duke.

  Pope Ludo’s right hand was a giant, blacksmith of a man. His great, round shoulders were further inflated by his scarlet robes and the huge, red hands that peeped from the sleeves confirmed the scale of his ham-like arms. He had a wide, crimson face with bright blue eyes that seemed out of place in the mass of red that was formed by his costume and complexion. Some people referred to him as ‘the Red Ogre’ but never to his face.

  ‘So?’ he enquired rudely, causing the Duke an invisible shudder of displeasure. The Duke hated the Pope and the Pope’s man with equal vigour and distaste. He would happily have them both tortured and killed, but, he reminded himself, that would simply not do. Not yet.

  ‘So,’ he replied calmly, ‘you come seeking the answer to two questions; two issues upon which we shall reach an accord.’

  Knowing that the Cardinal was a notoriously impatient man the Duke decided that to come to the point as obliquely as possible would be the most satisfactory manner for the conversation to proceed.

  ‘The first is an international issue of state, revenue and order that has been under regular discussion between ourselves for a number of years. In this matter, I have, up to a point, indulged your employer in return for a certain degree of courtesy or-‘

  ‘A percentage.’ Bull concluded brusquely, ‘A percentage; that is what you have. A certain percentage of the Sacred Revenues from the Holy Monasteries of Southern France in return for-‘

  ‘-My recognition of your fake claimant to the throne.’ Bull’s interruption had thwarted the Duke’s desire to spin things out. He therefore felt obliged to be offensive.

  ‘King Louis is the rightful King of France,’ Bull sat straighter and sneered at the Duke, ‘His coronation was overseen by His Holiness Himself and he is clearly the son of the late King Jacques, whom all recognised as the true and legal monarch of France.’

  ‘That is evident,’ agreed the Duke, ‘But we both know that he is not the first born son of King Jacques, or, in fact, King Louis at all.’

  They fell silent and Bull nodded suspiciously at Naiman.’

  ‘He is for the other business,’ explained the Duke, ‘his discretion is assured and already purchased. Shall we proceed?’

  Bull nodded stiffly and the Duke continued.

  ‘The late King Jacques, God rest his Royal Soul, had a long and childless marriage to a cold and inauspicious Countess from Gratz. I recall that I advised against the match, however, King Jacques and God’s Representative on Earth believed that they knew better than I, and the foolishness went ahead. This dearth of regal offspring caused some anxiety to your wise and exalted employer, particularly as the King of France controls the profits from the fine and Holy Monasteries that line the Mediterranean Coast. His Holiness has always been a gracious and appreciative beneficiary of their benevolence, or as you so vulgarly put it; ‘he took a percentage.’ In response therefore, to this inconvenient issue of the lack of issue, that prevented proper succession planning, the following occurred; on the propitious, yet sad, expiry of the aforementioned Countess (now a Queen), due to a sudden illness that tragically afflicted her after a fine, yet entirely ordinary Papal dinner; the bereaved Monarch was quickly acquainted with the fair and fecund Lady Salicia of Salerno.’

  ‘I am sure that it was only regal duty that made the late King Jacques cut through the red tape (and black millinery) of mourning in order to wed the lovely Salicia very shortly after the unhappy event of his first wife’s sad demise. That being said; a wedding took place and the air was thick with expectation of an heir. At the traditional time, following conception (which occurred almost immaculately!) there was another happy event and the Crown Prince Louis was born. Happy events did not end there! Hot on the heels of the new Dauphin, a second babe was delivered, an identical, but not first born Prince, who was to be known as Louie-Louie, or, in French; Louis Deux. This is where the happy events run out, as the lovely Salicia, having put life into the failing French monarchy, ran out of it herself and succumbed to one of those tiresome diseases that should really only affect the lower orders.’

  ‘The tragedy of the lovely Salicia’s passing was sufficient to rob the late King Jacques of the small faculty of reason that he had somehow preserved through the arid desert of his long and arduous first marriage and the ardent dessert of his shorter second. He continued to reign, as insane monarchs tend to do, without even the slightest fluctuation in the effectiveness of Royal governance; however his sons; Louis and Louie-Louie fell under the influences of the powerful men at court.’

  ‘Louis; as befits the beneficiary of primogeniture came under the authority of King Jacques’ greatest military leader; Marshall Gney. He raised Louis in line with his own beliefs; which predictably included, respect for one’s elders, respect for hierarchy and order, great reverence for military power; due, yet not excessive, regard for the church, and lastly, much to the displeasure of your employer, a strong regard for nationalism and the desire to make France the great nation and international power that the Marshall believes it should become.’

  The Duke looked up at this point and smiled pleasantly at Cardinal Bull, drawing the thin and leathery skin of his lips painfully across his canine teeth. He continued,

  ‘I have it on the best authority that, at this time, the imprudent Marshall Gney suffered a number of assassination attempts from attackers who could, perhaps, have been described as “clerically motivated?” I am always impressed by the devotion some young people bring to their religious principles! This careless, obvious and ineffectual attempt to influence the future of France predictably produced the opposite effect from the one which was intended. Marshall Gney became, within the confines of ultra-right wing, upper class thought, almost anti-clerical. It was after one of these curiously fruitless attempts that ‘Le Grand Marshall’ put a bill before the Royal Parliament suggesting that the revenues produced by Holy Gambling in the South Coast Monasteries, instead of coming to the King somewhat sequestered by the Pontiff’s predatory percentage, should in future arrive free and clear, in order to greater build the glory of France. I believe the intention was to do this armed might and military conquest. However-‘

  Bull interrupted,

  ‘However, the bill still sits before the Royal Parliament and has not moved since the late King Jacques was unable to reach any decisive conclusion before his recent and untimely death.’

  The Duke eyed his adversary carefully.

  ‘It wasn’t you who killed him?’

  Bull shrugged as if to indicate that if he had, it would not have been a matter of great account, before replying,

  ‘Old age. Insanity. The usual. He is at peace.’

  The Duke continued to stare at Bull, who flushed a slightly deeper red,

  ‘If I had, I would say, but we prefer to avoid regicide where alternatives exist. If it had proved unavoidable we would not have shirked our duty. We both accept the necessity of what needs to be done being done.’

  ‘For the good of the State.’

  ‘And the good of the Church.’

  They both smiled cagily. The Duke continued,

  ‘The Louis raised by Marshall Gney would clearly favour the adoption of this bill, much to his Holiness’ displeasure.’

  ‘But an alternative exists and a plan is in place,’ said Bull, ‘the younger son, Louie-Louie, was raised by the spiritual and virtuous Cardinal Mascarpone-’

  Bull was interrupted by the Duke’s snort of laughter. Bull persevered,

  ‘As I was saying; Louis Deux was raised by the respectable Cardinal to have a full and fair appreciation of the Church and the necessity for the state of France to, as it were, fall prostrate at the Holy Throne of God-’

  ?
??And continue to make the payments.’

  Anger was apparent on Bull’s face.

  ‘And continue to make the payments that are right and proper in a well ordered and spiritually sound Europe! Louie-Louie understood how the temporal state must pay due regard to the eternal and virtuous throne of the Pope, and soundly supported the withdrawal of the bill.’

  ‘And so you had the older brother murdered and replaced with his twin, just after the recent coronation. Now you are here to persuade me that our agreement should remain. This business hardly requires a man of your stature, Bull. Of course I agree. What is different?’

  Bull drew in a sharp breath. He was shocked. He had never considered that the Duke did not know, down to the last detail, what they had done. Quickly he tried to weigh up his options; if the Duke did not know then there was no need to explain; however if he found out…

  The thought of the Duke finding out decided things for Bull. He would need to tell the whole story.

  The Duke, who already knew the whole story, was extremely gratified by the effect of his pretence. Bull would tell him all anyway, but he would go away thinking that he was just a little smarter. That thought almost made the Duke laugh out loud. Cardinal Bull smarter than the Duke of Jutland? Perhaps on the day when Hell froze over, Fish began to fly, or the seas turned red! He watched delightedly as the Cardinal thought ferociously about how he was going to tell his story in such a way that it did not seem as positively criminal as it obviously was.

  ‘I’m waiting.’

  The Cardinal released a sharp breath with a perceptible sigh. He concentrated and then briskly slapping his thighs, he continued in what the Duke thought of as his ‘pulpit voice.’

  ‘The ways of men are Wicked and Ungodly!’ Having realised what he had done, the Cardinal almost ground to a halt, but then he decided to press on.

  ‘And the only succour for the Righteous is to be found in the Bosom of the Holy Church. The vine either groweth or withereth; this has been known since ancient time. When the Ungodly threaten the Temple of Solomon, then the Wise must act to see that the Lamb is not laid upon the Wrong Altar. It is a duty given to the Godly that they should inhibit the Sinner on the Error Strewn Road to his own Damnation and, where he would headlong hurl himself into the Abyss, the Good Servant must place obstacles in his way, lest he should fall into the Fire and be consumed.’

  The Duke yawned, rudely, ‘A poor mixture of pedantry and devotion; please come to the point.’

  ‘Of course, of course, I was speaking of France, the nation. It is a young nation, a new nation and it is at risk, extreme risk, of falling from the Path of Righteousness into the furnace of dissolution and immorality. The new King, Louis, would cut off the Papal Revenues and instead seek to gain military dominion over Europe! He would turn away the Hand of Faith and repudiate his filial duty to the Pope. He would deny us our rights and monies. We could not sit idly by as this young and foolish man failed in his duty and bought his kingdom under the dominion of the Lord of Darkness. We were forced to act!’

  The Duke appeared sceptical,

  ‘I have never quite seen Marshall Gney as the Prince of Darkness, however we were speaking of a great deal of money, and the young King seems to have scant regard for its rightful ownership. Please, carry on.’

  ‘As you wish. In the face of such an insubordinate challenge to the legitimate rights of the Office of the Papacy, we were obliged to consult with our southern friends about a suitable scheme to ensure the succession of the tariff.’

  The Cardinal’s face darkened at the mention of ‘our southern friends’ and the Duke was delighted that the Cardinal was clearly uncomfortable in discussing them.

  ‘The Templar’s of the Cursed Rock!’ he exclaimed happily, ‘a fine choice, there is no better-‘

  ‘Band of thieving, scheming, unholy, godless brigands upon the face of the Earth!’ Bull thundered out his interruption, and his face became an even more livid scarlet than it had been before.

  ‘I see they charged their usual rate,’ said the Duke, ‘But I assume the scheme was effective?’

  They both waited while the Cardinal’s rage subsided. Naiman wondered if they would ever come to the point where he was needed. The Cardinal steadily clenched and unclenched his huge fists.

  ‘Yes, to both counts,’ he continued more calmly, ‘they charged an enormous sum, but what they did was effective.’

  ‘You remember, of course, that Louis has an identical brother Louie-Louie (also known as Louie Deux) who, having been raised by the impeccably virtuous Cardinal Mascarpone is favourably disposed to the Church? A lad much better suited for high office than the greedy, stubborn warmongering brother. It was arranged that, shortly after the coronation, while the bellicose Prince was engaged in one of his infernal ‘military exercises’ that he should be taken by our templar friends and replaced with the good and reliable Louis Deux, who is now recognised as the legitimate King. He can now be in a position to happily dismiss the whole foolish issue of the bill at the next meeting of the Royal Parliament.’

  See,’ interrupted the Duke, ‘it is as I said. You have killed the first and replaced him with the second. Congratulations! I approve. Again I cannot see why we need to have this conference, let us press on to the second matter!’

  ‘But that is not the case,’ disagreed the Cardinal, ‘and because of what has actually been done, and what may now happen; the first matter now connects with the second.’

  Although the Duke was delighted by this news, a lifetime of training (and a naturally unpleasing countenance) meant that he looked both shocked and angry.

  ‘You had better continue.’

  The Cardinal did as he was told.

  ‘The Templars did not kill the boy because; as have I said; we avoid regicide wherever possible. It brings the Church into disrepute. Go around slaughtering the Monarchs of the Earth and soon the commons will find the Clergy fair game. We have no wish to raise those expectations! Also; the Louis’ are young, one might die, and so we might need the other to replace him. It is better to have two Kings in the bank than none at all. It is also useful for the saintly Cardinal Mascarpone to be able to threaten to replace the boy, if he should try to stray too far from the Holy Path; independence in created Kings is hardly a virtue. We ordered Louis to be kept alive and imprisoned in an iron mask beneath the monastery of Monte San Carlos. Our puppet is in place, we have secured his obedience and arranged a form of insurance should anything go wrong.’

  The Duke pretended to think deeply about this new stratagem. He then quietly applauded.

  ‘A fine scheme, a fine scheme; But what I don’t yet understand is how this relates to the second matter, which is, as you are well aware, arranging the timely death of the pestilential Beowulf. How are these things connected?’

  ‘Would that the only motives for destroying the fell Beowulf were how despicable he is! He has murdered your daughter, destroyed the Greatest Beer Hall Ever Built, removed your vassal, King Lars and has probably done much more besides; but it is not his past deeds that concern us – it is what he may do next. We have men searching from the Rhine to the Tiber, but we are unable to locate him as yet. We understand you have had him pursued out of Germany, but he has not been caught.’

  ‘My motive,’ intoned the Duke, ‘is merely his destruction and I have now acquired the instrument of his extinction.’ He gestured to Naiman, who bowed discreetly.

  ‘However you seem to have an agenda of some urgency. What threat does Beowulf pose to the Papacy? I’m aware of his atheistic views and general contempt for civilised religion and his attachment to what he calls ‘nihilistic philosophy’ but I fail to see what danger, he alone, can pose to the might of Rome.’

  ‘Are you aware that he was once in the mercenary army of Marshall Gney?’ asked the Cardinal, ‘They fought together at the battle of Linz. Beowulf orchestrated a trap where the commanders of the Batavian Army were murdered and so Gney was able to defeat a far greater force
.’

  ‘Of course I was aware of this! But did they not quarrel afterwards? I believe that he called the Marshall “a whey-faced, flatulent, posturing fool who could no more command an army than he could expound the ideas of Plato.” They parted on bad terms, Beowulf was angry that the Marshall took the credit for the victory.’

  ‘A ruse,’ claimed the Cardinal, who then readied himself for a barrage of the Duke’s anger. The Duke, however, grew more composed. He accepted the possibility. He knew how clever Beowulf could be; almost as clever as his probable (yet unproven) father.

  ‘How do you know this?’

  ‘One of the Templars was foolish enough to be caught by the Marshall’s men. He did not divulge the plan, but the Marshall is well aware that the Louis he has is not the Louis he wants. He cannot do anything about this as both Louis’, having not yet made the mistake of ruling long, are popular with both the commons and the nobility; besides, he has no proof. He sent a number of messengers to summon Beowulf to help him. We intercepted some, but I imagine that others may have succeeded. We anticipate that Beowulf will try to join the Marshall at the Monastery of Monte San Carlos and there they will try to expose our King Louis in order to gain the revenues from the monasteries for the Marshall’s army of conquest. We believe that he will try to gain ascendancy in Europe and this can only come at the expense of the two great powers-‘

  ‘Jutland and the Papacy. We must make short work of Beowulf. This is my man.’

  He gestured to Naiman, who stepped forward.

  ‘He is not one of the mystical assassins from the East; however he is the best that the civilised world can offer. He will track down and destroy Beowulf. Your information as to his destination is particularly helpful.’

  The Cardinal looked doubtful, ‘He is but one man. How can we be sure he will succeed?’

  ‘Do you remember the improbable murder of Duke Lorenzo de Tibili?’

  ‘Who was killed in a locked room, inside his own special tower that was surrounded day and night by a hundred guards? There were no marks on his body, no sign of the assassin’s entry and the only way that his men were sure he had been murdered was that an embroidered glove was left at the scene.’

  ‘That Lorenzo Tibili,’ confirmed the Duke.

  Naiman smiled and handed the Cardinal a white embroidered glove. The Cardinal noticed a small character on the glove. He looked at Naiman who ferociously bared his teeth as he returned his stare.

  ‘Oh,’ said the Cardinal.