Chapter Six
The Dragon's Tooth was full, yet around me was an ominously empty space. I snarled at any who came close, letting only the barmaid near when she took me more wine. Still in my hand was the crumpled letter, wanting to throw it away, but unable to. Ajator had married Veinara. I was getting drunk.
I was happy for him and at the same time cast into a black mood brought on by the loss of a woman I had once dared to dream of a life with. It was only on reading the letter that I realised that the hope still lingered. The letter told of how Ajator could not bear the thought of leaving her for the seas again without knowing she would be waiting for him. I could not rid myself of the image of Veinara’s face when she had smiled at me over dinner, and the kiss she had left me with. I wanted Ajator to have his fling, and then move on, opening up the possibility that Veinara might turn to me. It was pathetic, I knew, but I could not help it; I was young and foolish. She was Ajator's now. She was just a fantasy, and I had to let it go and wine was good for that, at least, that is what I was telling myself.
I had originally gone to the Naval Office to see if there were any orders, and there was one, a standing order. The message was from High Admiral Lord Villor and it commanded all captains and commanders to attempt the capture of a rebel code book without the enemy's knowledge. Rumour was that a rebel fleet were finally amassing for an attack on Umuron, and should the Empire get hold of such a book we would be able to confirm this and counter it. It was funny that this news came from the men at the Dragon's Tooth and not the Naval Office. Although a captain now, I still needed to prove myself worthy of any sensitive intelligence. The rumour further went that calls for reinforcements from the city where going unheard. These were troubling times and the sooner we could get to sea, the better. As for the book, "The enemy must not suspect that we have captured one!" read the order. The letter was handed to me by the clerk together with the standing order.
I filled my cup again with the new bottle of wine. They had married in secret. Father was angry. Of course the old duke would forgive Ajator in time but he will be disappointed at the poor match. In the old days such a marriage would never have been allowed, but in these enlightened times, the blood of the aristocracy was being watered down by ideas of love. Probably a good thing, I thought morosely. It needs a good cleaning. Draining the cup in one go, I looked at the dregs of dark wine at the bottom of my cup. Blood. Those born high fought so hard to hold onto it, even at the expense of the blood of those born low. I was stuck somewhere in between. Born high, yet only one look at me would tell you that I was blood of the low. Father did not understand it. Nobody did. A freak, a prank of the gods, touched and cursed.
A flute was playing on the other side of the room, a young seaman with a good voice singing along. My crew warily eyed me but I did not care. I should have stayed in my cabin, but could not face being alone, yet I did not want to talk to anyone. Then, just as I was filling my cup again, resigned to losing myself completely in the drink, the crowd parted to let Harl and Jodlin through, both carrying sea sacks, Jodlin grinning for ear to ear.
"Feasler couldn't get rid of us fast enough!" said Harl throwing down his sack.
The choice was to growl and grumble, drink and brood, or, pull myself up and be a man. At first the former option held sway and I just wanted to forget the men, the ship and my duties, but where would that lead? Drink more, drink and drown. Who cares? Not the world, nor its people. When I thought this, inwardly I screamed at myself, pathetic worm. I scolded and chastised myself for the weakling that I was and a sober hand reached down to the depths where I dwelt and pulled me up. Move on, said I. Move up. Be a man.
I looked at the two. "Take a chair. Tell me what happened." I forced back my misery, and tried to clear my head.
"Captain Crosp saw the notes, and asked the doctor to have a look," said Jodlin. "I coughed a lot." They both sat down.
I could not help but smile a little. The plan had worked. "Tell me, what did Feasler say?"
"The doctor went as white as a ghost and covered his mouth with a cloth, then shouted at us to be gone," said Harl. "Shrieking, he was, like a little girl. Grotting Worms! He wailed. Off the ship! He shouted, and tripped over his own feet to get away from us!" Harl had obviously found it amusing. "They set sail at once, sir, fearing plague. We're yours to command."
"Excellent!" I said, rising. "Stow your kit and report to Mister Olvan, the greenest officer you ever met. He's trying though, so no tricks, but don't tell him I said so. He's aboard the girl now, eager as a puppy."
With that I returned to the ship, the fresh air clearing my head. Veinara was gone. My brother had found a wife. At least I now had Harl and Jodlin as well as some marines. There was a bit of good fortune in that a Sergeant Lamtak and ten marines were assigned to the Lady Ocean that morning. They were newly arrived and had spent the last couple of years in the cold north, protecting the river ways until their ship was decommissioned with a damaged hull after running aground. A new one was not expected for the foreseeable future. This was the Empire's problem. The larger it got, the more it cost to maintain, and the Navy was not cheap. In places it gave, and in such places the enemies of the Empire moved in. Now though, I counted myself lucky. I had a small crew, an officer, a doctor, an engineer and some marines all sworn in to the Ardalrion Fleet as was the tradition. Now I could get to work. Of course I needed more officers including a navigator, but could make do without them, whereas I couldn't without sailors. Now was not the time to dwell on my loss, now was the chance to take action. I threw the letter into the waters, consigning it to the depths. The choice was made; I would be a man.