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“I’m doing fine,” I said repressively.
Sharon, thank God, saved me. “I think it’s wonderful that you’re out there, pursuing your dream. ”
“Thanks. ”
“And you?” Abe’s dad said to his son. “You’re being good? Showing her the sights?”
I almost choked on my cube of squash. Oh, yes. All the sights.
Abe smiled brightly. “Giving her all the best tours. ”
Oh my God, this was so awkward and they didn’t even know it.
The rest of dinner went as well as could be expected when you’re engaged in a clandestine relationship that you’re attempting to keep from two sets of parents, and I gave a sigh of relief when it was over. I didn’t like separating from Abe, bidding him good night like I didn’t wish I could climb into bed beside him, but we pulled it off. He squeezed my hand quickly, and then we were in different cars headed back to the same town.
* * *
The next morning, I walked down to the high school track for the Turkey Day 5K. We weren’t scheduled to show up to the Krasners’ until one, and this way I had time to meet with Gabi and Cindy.
Gabi actually ran, while Cindy and I leisurely walked arm in arm. “So how is it? New York. ”
We were the kind of friends that had grown up together, who had been each other’s sounding boards during the terrors of adolescence, who had suffered acnes and embarrassments. We’d been together through the moments when the world opens up and each sunset is a marvel and life could be wonderful and horrible in the same minute.
I still didn’t know exactly how to broach the topic of Abe to her. “It’s. . . interesting. ”
“Cold. ”
I let out a huff of breath. “Yes, that. ”
We took another few steps. “Interesting how?”
“Um. . . You know that Abe lives there. ”
She groaned. “Oh, please no. ”
I stopped and twisted toward her in surprise. Cindy had always displayed more patience with my crush than Gabi had, though I’d known she wasn’t always convinced it was my healthiest move. “What?”
She looked a tiny bit uncomfortable as she shrugged. “You know. I don’t want you going down that path again. ”
“I didn’t,” I said automatically. “I mean—not the, um, unrequited infatuation. ”
She tilted her head warily. “What does that mean?”
I swallowed. “We’re sort of. . . dating. ”
She stared at me, eyes wide and dark behind her glasses. Then she turned and bellowed across the track. “Gabi!”
I winced. Most of the other runners and walkers glanced our way. Gabi, a third of the track behind us, immediately cut across the grass and was at our side in seconds, barely breathing hard. “What?”
Cindy pointed at me.
I raised my hands in defense. “Nothing. ”
Cindy scowled. “Tamar. ”
Oh, fine. “I just mentioned that it’s possible that I may be kind of dating Abe. ”
Gabi stared, and then leaned her head back and groaned. “Are you fucking kidding me?”
“What?” I swiveled between the two of them. Guilt and irritation and a roiling uncomfortableness bubbled up inside me. “Why is this bad? Why not good?”
“Abe?” Cindy said. “Kind of dating?”
Gabi nodded. “He comes to you with a ring, then we’ll be happy. ”
“Wait. ” I held up my hands. “Isn’t a ring getting ahead of ourselves?”
“You’ve spent ten years hung up him. I don’t think so. ”
Cindy frowned. “Maybe she’ll get him out of her system?”
Gabi sighed. “Impossible. ” Then her eyes widened. “Wait, are you two actually sleeping together?”
Why were my cheeks so hot? “Yes. ”
“Oh my God. Wait, so are you actually dating or just hooking up?”
“We’re dating. ”
Gabi let out a frustrated sigh. “Look, I love you, and I like Abe. He’s a great guy. But do you really want to do this to yourself again? Honestly?”
I stared at them. “Yes. ”
“Well, what about you reporting on the Leopards and him playing for them?” Cindy’s tone was the vocal equivalent of wringing her hands. “That has to be messy. ”
“It hasn’t been that bad. His teammates seem pretty good at keeping their private lives private, and at work. . . it’s been okay. ” Tanya’s face rose in my memory, crafty and considering. I’m not going to fire you. I’m going to use you.
I pushed that aside. She hadn’t done anything.
She wouldn’t do anything.
I was sure everything would be fine.
* * *
My parents and I showed up at the Krasners’ at quarter of one, bearing fresh fruit and pumpkin pie. Their kitchen, dining and living rooms overflowed with cousins and neighbors. Charlie, old and white but still moving, wagged his way through the chaos and made sure to come greet everyone with a sniff of his wet snout and hope in his large eyes that we bore gifts of food. I bent down to ruffle his soft head as I stood beside my parents, scanning the rooms—as I had so many Thanksgivings in the past—for Abraham.
There. He stood talking to two cousins, a high school senior and a college sophomore.
He looked up, and his eyes caught on mine. With a quick word to his cousins, he excused himself and wended through the gaggle of people. He said hello to my parents and then knelt down on Charlie’s other side, his hand going immediately to scratch his ruff. Charlie’s tongue lolled out in appreciation. “Hey. ”
I smiled at him, still thrown off-kilter by my conversation with my friends. “Charlie’s getting up there. ”
He grabbed the lab’s floppy ears and gently blew in his face, which made Charlie poke his snout forward inquisitively. “He’s an old boy. ”
But we had no time to exchange any other words, because his dad hollered for Abe to come help with the turkey, and as soon as I’d worked my way past a few relatives who wanted to say hello and managed to wash my hands, Sharon caught my arm. “Go get the veggie platter from the fridge?”
“On it. ” I slipped away, through the kitchen and down the door into the garage, where dark and coolness dominated. Bikes and skis lined the walls, and I skated by one of the cars until I reached the two extra fridges in the back. Light radiated as I opened one, and slowly tugged the veggie platter from its place on top of several pies. Balancing it on one hand, I gave the door a nudge closed.
“So. ”
I jumped slightly as the door closed to reveal Abe. The extinguished fridge bulb meant the only illumination came from the windows at the top of the garage door, which let in a pale, dispersed sunlight. “Oh, hi. ”
An uneasy air had settled on him. “You sounded funny earlier. What’s wrong?”
How odd, that I used to think only I could decipher facial nuances in an instant. I held the veggie plate in front of me like a shield and strove to answer in a balanced tone. “I went down to the track today. For the Turkey race. ”
He waited.
I fixated on the drifting clouds seen through the small windows. “I saw Gabi and Cindy. ”
“The three musketeers reunited. ” He sounded warily amused. “And I take it they had opinions about us. ”