Though I tried to take as much of his length into my moth as possible, I knew there was no way I could deep throat him. Luckily, I didn't think he would mind. Hagen pushed up on his elbows and watched me lick his shaft and suck the head of his cock. His fingers sifted through my loose hair as I bobbed up and down on his dick.
"Come here," he said unexpectedly. He clasped me by the upper arms and hauled me up his body. I wasn't sure what he wanted until I felt him start pressing on my shoulder. Then I understood.
I spun around and planted my knees on either side of his chest. Facing his feet, I lowered my mouth to his cock again. I was too short and he was just too tall to make the traditional sixty-nine pose work but Hagen found another way to drive me crazy. Those thick, long fingers of his explored my pussy.
Sucking his cock made me so wet. His fingers encountered no resistance as they slipped through my folds and circled my swollen clit. He pushed a finger inside me, penetrating me slowly. I moaned around his dick. He groaned softly and used both hands to stimulate me. Two fingers thrust in and out of my wet passage. The fingers of his other hand rubbed my clit until I was clawing at his thighs and groaning around the cock buried in my mouth.
"Hagen!" I shouted his name as he grabbed my hips and dragged me higher up his body. He jammed his face between my thighs and lapped at my pussy. The odd position and the strange angle of his flicking tongue awakened every nerve-ending below my waist. I stroked his cock with my hand as he devoured my sex, his tongue lashing my clit until I exploded. "Hagen! Hagen! Ah!"
He moaned between my thighs and kept licking me until I thought I would pass out. Overwhelmed, I slid off him and onto the bed. He curled up to my back and grasped my thigh. Lifting my leg, he angled his body just right and thrust into my welcoming pussy with one sharp movement. I gasped at the sudden invasion of his big cock.
Lips on my neck, he kissed my skin and gently rocked in and out of me. I reached back and clutched his side. His hand snaked around my front and slid down my lower belly. His fingers found my clitoris. I sighed gently as he took me slowly, his thrusts long and deep and measured, while his fingertips circled my clit.
There was no race to climax this time. I relished his heat and strength. Cocooned in his strong arms, I closed my eyes and focused on the wondrous sensations he evoked with his fingers and thrusting cock. His lips danced down my neck and across my shoulder and cheek. "God, Cassie, you're so fucking tight."
"Hagen," I whimpered his name.
He thrust hard enough to make me gasp. "You love my cock, don't you, Cassie?"
"Yes," I said, nearly sobbing with need.
"You love the way my cock fills your snug, little cunt."
"Yes. Yes!"
He bit down on the fleshy bit where my shoulder curved into my neck and tapped my clit with his fingertip. The sharp bite and the increased pressure around my clitoris sent me reeling over the edge. I came hard as he continued to take me with deliberate, deep thrusts.
I was still quaking with aftershocks when he pressed me onto my stomach, grabbed my hips and hauled me up onto my knees. His fingers tangled in my hair as he slammed into me, burying his shaft to the hilt in my wet sheath. I cried out and clawed at the duvet.
"Too much?" he asked, his voice tight and clipped.
"No! God. No!" I pushed back to meet his thrusts, proving that I liked this rougher side of things. He growled and started to take me like some wild thing. My breasts ached. My nipples buzzed as they drew tight to hard peaks. Our bodies slapped together noisily. The force of his bigger frame slamming into mine again and again left me panting and shaking. Never had I never imagined sex could be like this. So wild. So primitive. So real.
"Hagen. Hagen!"
"That's it, Cassie. Beg me for my cock."
"More! Oh! Oh!"
"You want more, baby girl? Like this?" He jackhammered my pussy now. Every fast, shallow thrust added to my building climax.
"Yes. Oh! Harder. Please. Please." I needed to come so badly. My poor clit throbbed. I slipped a hand between my thighs and furiously rubbed the pink pearl. A short time later, I shrieked his name again and started to come. I gripped the bedcovers in one hand and strummed my clit with the other while wave after wave of pure bliss engulfed me.
I thought for sure he'd come with me but he held back again. When my climax finally faded, he flipped me onto my back and climbed between my thighs. His huge body covered mine. He planted those big hands on either side of my head. When he claimed my mouth in a sensual, searching kiss, I melted. Our tongues fluttered together as he thrust into me again and again.
Captured beneath this male behemoth, I experienced the strangest thrill of belonging. My hands roamed his sides and his back, my fingertips discovering the old scars and dark tattoos marking his skin. Some of the scars were obviously from knives or other sharp objects. One or two looked puckered like bullet wounds. A few of them I couldn't even guess as to how they'd been created.
Taking hold of his muscled forearms, I held onto him. Our gazes clashed with such intensity as he made love to me. Our lips touched and separated, our breaths mingling as he started to shudder and approach the beginning of his climax. I wound my thighs around his waist and squeezed him tightly, milking his cock with my pussy as he shoved deep inside me and came. His lips ghosted across my ear. Only one word escaped them.
"Mine."
The possessive ring to his declaration should have bothered me but I couldn't imagine belonging to anyone else. I wanted him to claim me. I wanted him to call me his.
Hagen fell onto his side but pulled me close. He tucked me into the little spot created by his bent arm and thigh, snuggling me tightly to his chest. I happily placed my head on him and draped my arm across his body. Feeling sleepy and humming with post-orgasmic bliss, I let him stroke and caress me.
I told myself I wouldn't fall asleep, that I'd just doze for a few moments before getting up to go home. The reassuring thud of his big heart tempted me to stay even longer. His lips brushed my forehead in a gentle kiss. I realized in that moment that Hagen was even more dangerous than I'd ever imagined. Walking into his bar that afternoon, I'd been sure he would break me and my brother. Now, though, I understood his biggest threat to me wasn't violence.
No, it was hope. Hope that I wouldn't be alone. Hope that I wouldn't have to face life without someone to love and support me.
And hope could be a very dangerous thing.
CHAPTER FOUR
The annoying chirp of my cell phone shattered the lovely dream I was enjoying. Without opening my eyes, I slapped at what should have been my bedside table. The sensation of my hand smacking warm skin shocked me right out of my slumbering state. Sucking in a sharp breath, I bolted upright.
"Easy." Hagen's now familiar voice cut through the darkness. "It's just me."
I blinked a few times before the memory of our night flashed through my mind. "Did I fall asleep after…?"
"Yes. I didn't want to wake you. I had your purse brought in from the car and let you sleep."
My phone started to ring again. My stomach knotted. It had to be very late or very early. There was only one person who could call me at this time of night and so many times in a row. Groaning, I pushed down the sheet and moved to the edge of the bed. "Where is my purse?"
"I put it on the chair in the corner." Hagen flicked on a lamp. I shielded my eyes until they grew accustomed to the brightness.
The idea of answering the phone while naked weirded me out. Obviously, Ronnie wouldn't be able to see me but it just didn't feel right. I grabbed the first piece of clothing I could find—Hagen's shirt—and slipped into it. The phone started to chirp and vibrate again. I picked up my purse and fished around inside the bag until I found my phone. I glanced at the screen and frowned. It wasn't a number I recognized.
"Hello?"
"Cassie?"
I didn't recognize the female voice either. "Yes. Who is this?"
"Um…that doesn't matter. Look, Ronnie
is hurt."
"What? How?" My knees wobbled as terror struck my gut. "Is he okay? How badly?"
"He ran into some guys who owned some debt of his. It's pretty bad."
"Where is he?" My voice was barely a whisper now. My heart was racing so fast I could hardly breathe.
She rattled off the name of a hospital downtown and then hung up. I dropped the phone and rubbed my forehead. Sick with dread, I tried not to think about how badly Ronnie could be hurt. He was out there right now, suffering alone, and needed me.
The jangle of a belt buckle broke into my thoughts. I glanced over my shoulder to find Hagen getting dressed. Clearly he'd pieced together my side of the conversation. I didn't understand it but the sight of him infuriated me. The reality that someone in his line of business—hell, maybe even one of his goons—had put the hurt on my brother for owing some debt, hit me like a ton of bricks.
Hagen frowned at me. "Cassie, snap out of it and get dressed."
I stiffened at his instruction. "Don't tell me what to do."
He didn't even flinch at my snarled reply. "I know you're upset."
My jaw tightened. "You don't know anything about me."
"Are we back to this again?" He leveled a maddeningly calm stare my way. "I thought we talked about this in my office. I know more about you than you think."
The reminder of our discussion in his office left me feeling unsettled. God, how stupid could I be? What the hell was I thinking getting involved with this man? I knew better than to trust someone so dangerous. What the hell was wrong with me?
I'd let my guard down with Hagen. I'd let him seduce me. I'd let the man who had made it possible for Ronnie to get himself into this kind of trouble wine and dine me. Now my brother was in the hospital—and I'd been sleeping with the enemy.
Hagen strode toward me. "Talk to me, Cassie."
"I can't do this, Hagen." I pulled off his shirt, threw it at him and reached for my dress. "I can't be with the person responsible for my brother's downfall. You're the reason he's in the hospital now."
His eyebrow arched. "Am I?"
I glared at him before tugging my dress down over my head. "Don't play stupid, Hagen. You knew he was a gambling addict. You gave him the money. You kept increasing his credit at those stupid poker games. It's like giving a suicidal person a loaded gun!"
"Guns aren't my line of business. That's Jackie Boy's action."
I gritted my teeth. "I'm trying to be serious. People like you prey on the weak. You destroy them. You've destroyed my brother. Someday you'll do the same to me."
My accusation hung in the air between us. Finally, he spoke. "Do you really believe that?"
"I—" The answer didn't come. It died on my lips. Everything Hagen had shown me had been nothing but sweetness and kindness. He'd gone out of his way to show me that he would never harm me. "No," I admitted grudgingly. "I don't."
"You know what I think?" He crossed the distance between us with a few powerful strides.
"No." I shook my head and kept my gaze glued to my bare feet.
Hagen tipped my chin and forced me to meet his warm, affectionate gaze. "I think you're pissed off at your brother. I think you're terrified that you're going to lose him like you lost your parents. I think it's easier to shout at me than it is to think about how afraid you are right now."
He was right, of course. I was beginning to wonder if he was always right.
He opened his arms and I stepped into his embrace. Hot tears burned my eyes. Hagen didn't say anything else. He just held me and rubbed my back until I was ready to pull away and finished getting dressed.
After asking me which hospital, he took my hand and led me down to the garage. We climbed into one of his cars. As he pulled out of his gated community, he said, "About your brother's debt with me…"
Dread settled in the pit of my stomach. "Yes?"
"I wrote it off the second you walked through my office door."
"What? But you said—"
"I know what I said. I just—I wanted you. I knew a girl like you would never—not with someone like me."
"So you bluffed me."
"Yes."
"I should kick your ass, you know that?"
He laughed and smiled over at me. "You could try, Tiny."
"God," I said and wiped a hand down my face. "You know what's even crazier than this hot mess with my brother and the money and your blackmail?"
"No. What?"
"I'm not even that pissed off at you." I couldn't believe it but it was true. "I should be. I should be furious with you—but I'm not. How screwed up are we?"
"We're not anymore screwed up than most couples, I'd guess."
My eyes widened. "Are we a couple?"
He rubbed his thumb across my palm. "I don't know. Are we?"
I considered all that had happened in the short hours Id' known him. There was no denying the connection I'd made to Hagen. Our relationship might not have started in the most noble of ways but it was real. It was true. We were creating some sort of foundation. This could go somewhere.
I bit my lower lip. "I think we play this one day at a time."
"I can do slow and easy."
Our peace made, we drove in silence through the ridiculously early Houston morning. The windshield wiper blades thwacked softly as they cleared away the heavy dew that accumulated on the glass. The warm, muggy morning promised an even hotter, more miserable day.
When we reached the hospital's parking lot, Hagen found a spot and killed his engine. He shot me an apologetic look. "I can't go in with you. Not now."
I started to ask why but then noticed the police cruisers parked near the emergency room entrance. "Oh."
"I didn't have anything to do with your brother's injuries, Cassie. If the cops see me strolling in there with you, it's just—it's going to cause more problems for you and your brother than you need."
"I understand." I figured this wouldn't be the first time we had to navigate a tricky situation because of Hagen's history and occupation. I wondered if this was why he was so keen on the idea of shedding his past as a loan shark and moving into the world of legal lending.
"While you're in there, I'm going to make some calls. This thing with your brother? It ends today. Right now. Whatever he owes around town, I'll make it right."
"No! Hagen, you can't. I mean, it's too much."
He shook his head. "This is my gift to you."
"Why?" I asked in a whisper.
He cupped my face in his big hand and caressed my cheek. "I told you I'd take care of you. Now let me do that, Cassie."
I leaned over and kissed him gently. Our lips lingered for a long moment before I finally pulled away and grabbed my purse. "I'll text you when I find him."
He nodded. "I'll be waiting. Take your time."
Purse in hand, I left his car and walked across the mostly empty parking lot. There were a handful of hospital employees and firefighters enjoying an early morning smoke under a small awning away from all the entrances. I smiled at them as I walked by and couldn't help but wonder how crazy I must have looked all decked out in my little black dress at four-thirty in the morning.
A packed emergency room greeted me. Over a dull roar of coughing, moaning and rustling food wrappers, a weather man rattled off the day's lows and highs for the Gulf Coast region from the television mounted on the far wall. I made my way to the information desk and waited in line for my turn.
An exhausted woman in scrubs greeted me with a lackluster hello. She took my information and told me to have a seat. I picked a spot as far away from the coughing, sputtering patient as possible. Catching a cold or something worse wasn't high on my list of to-do's.
It was a quarter of an hour before a nurse came to fetch me. I hesitated outside the curtain closing off Ronnie's exam room. Gathering my courage, I pushed aside the striped curtain and stepped into his room. At first, he didn't see me. I was glad for the few seconds to compose myself. Rolled on his side and draped in one o
f those thin, ugly hospital gowns, he stared at the wall.
Well—out of one eye, at least.
His battered face was so swollen. One eyelid was closed. His taped, bloodied nose was clearly broken. The reddish purple mottling on his cheeks and chin looked awful and painful. One arm was in a sling and obviously broken. His careful breaths reminded me of the way I'd taken to breathing after the car accident. With multiple broken ribs, each breath had been excruciating. No doubt Ronnie now experienced the same thing.
"Hey," he rasped upon seeing me.
"Hey," I said and closed the curtain behind me. I made my way to the chair at his bedside and sat on the edge. Carefully, I took his good hand, the one with IV's attached, and raised it to my lips for a quick kiss. The heat of tears prickled my eyes. "Jesus, Ronnie."
"Yeah." His forlorn and ashamed expression tore at me. "I really fucked it up this time, Cass."
"What happened?"
He swallowed hard and lowered his gaze. "I went to see a guy about getting in on a game. I just—I thought if I could get a hot streak going, I could earn the money I needed to make things right. I was counting cards and it was going really well. I was up thousands—and then they caught me."
"Ronnie," I groaned his name. "Things were already being made right."
"With Hagen, maybe," he conceded, "but the others?" He shook his head. "Hell, Cassie, I owe money all over town."
"How much?" I didn't know if I could even stomach hearing the number but I needed to know.
"A lot, Cass. So much," he added remorsefully.
Even though I really wanted to smack the shit out of him for being so stupid, I rubbed his arm and reassured him. "It's okay, Ronnie."
"It's not." He gulped and shook his head. "It's not okay, Cass. What the hell am I doing? Look what I've done to us. To you. To me. I could have died tonight. And for what? For some stupid, fucking poker game or a football bet or a horse race?"
I was afraid to speak, afraid to shatter the moment. Was he finally understanding? Had it really taken something so violent and so drastic to make him see what his gambling addiction had done to him?