She smiled in what she probably meant to be a warm way, but all it did was make me want to vomit.
"Good enough. May the road rise up to meet you, Jayne Blackthorne."
"And may the fae get your sorry ass back to the Underworld where you belong before you hurt anyone else, Moriah Hawthorne."
I could still hear her laughter as I shut the door tight behind me, making sure the entire sword was out in the hallway first.
"What was she laughing about?" asked Spike, waiting for me down the hall.
"Nothing. I just told her a joke."
"I've got one, you want to hear it?" asked Tim.
"No. You're not funny."
"I am so funny," he insisted. "So a demon, an incubus, and an elemental walk into a bar ..."
I snatched Tim out of the air when his back was to me and held him close to my face. His eyes got as big as saucers, and he tried to struggle out of my grip.
"Are you suuuuure you waaaaant to teeeeellll that jooooooke, Tim?"
He wilted like a flower out of water. "Ewwww. No. Gah. Oxygen. Someone. Anyone. Help me. Saaaave meeeee ... " He remained flopped over to the side in my hand, eyes closed. After a few seconds he said, "What'd you have for breakfast? Anchovies?"
"I haven't eaten breakfast. Or dinner. Or anything for that matter." I looked at Spike. "Do you have any inside pull at the kitchens? Do you even know where they are?"
"Come on," he said, taking me by the hand. "I'll hook us up, and then we'll get the heck outta here. You think you can get us there ... to the Underworld?"
I nodded. "Yep. Just get me fed and to the meadow, and I'll take it from there." I reached my hand back and flung it out in front of me in a bowling motion, sending Tim screaming in part fear and part glee down the hallway in front of us. Pixie bowling. Sweet.
Spike smiled. "Will it be like the last time you took me realm traveling? If so, I need to go back to my room to get my crash helmet."
I snorted. "God, I sure hope not."
"What happened last time?" asked Tim, coming back to us in a not very straight flight path. "Willy wasn't able to tell us anything about that part. All he kept saying was that you took him on a boat and he floated all over the place." Tim flew in between us, backwards and a little out in front.
"Let's just say I lacked a little finesse," I said.
"Or you could say she threw us in the middle of a hurricane that dropped us off at Maggie's door with half the forest in our hair," clarified Spike.
"Yeah, or you could say that," I said, reaching up and tweaking his ear.
He grabbed me around the waist and squeezed me to him as we walked down the corridor. "You're not bad, Sparks, you know that?"
"If you say so," I said, smiling my head off, looking straight ahead, squeezing the sword in its scabbard with my other hand. I was afraid if I looked at him right now I'd go all goo-goo on him.
"Yeah. I do say so." He got to the door that was glowing up ahead and let me go, taking the handle and pulling. "Welcome to the fae compound kitchens."
CHAPTER NINETEEN
WE LEFT THE KITCHEN WITH a bunch of wrapped food and more water, ready to conquer the world. Or at least, the Underworld. Spike took us on a circuitous route he guaranteed would avoid any fae trying to look for us, and we arrived at the Infinity Meadow to the spot under my mom's tree in good enough time that I wasn't feeling totally anxious.
I sat down and crossed my legs. "Okay, so you guys can just relax. I've learned my lesson, I'm not going to do this without protection." I called out to The Green and transmitted a message. Keep us safe. Let no fae or demon or other creature get near us until I say we're ready. I pictured vines and grasses and branches trapping unsuspecting fae as they tried to approach, and hoped my visuals were enough to do the trick.
"What's the plan?" asked Spike, sitting down beside me. Tim buzzed around our heads.
"I'm going to reach out to Garrett. The Green is watching over us, but I can only do so much trying to get the idea of protection across, so keep a lookout."
"Gotcha." He rubbed my back. "We'll be here when you get back, and hopefully not with a demon poking at us."
"Good," I said, trying to block out the memories of being here not that long ago and stuck through with the sword that lay by my side right now. I closed my eyes, reaching into my mind, trying to find that dark place I had compelled Beau and Ben into. I could hear echoes of sounds - voices maybe - but no faces appeared. I called out to Garrett, telling him I needed him and that his sister said hello. That got me nothing but spooky sounds, so I quit doing it pretty quickly.
I peeked an eye open and saw Tim practicing his barrel rolls and Spike strumming an air guitar. I went back to my not-so-happy place and gave up with the calm and mature approach, yelling as loud as I could in my head. "Gaaarrrrett! Where in the hell are you?! Get in here now! I need passage to the Underworld!"
"Why hello, young Jayne. So very nice to see you again," said the smooth, cultured voice of the vampire I knew to be Garrett.
I spun around in the dark place of my mind, trying to figure out where his voice was coming from. "Lights on," I said out into the space, illuminating it enough that I could see the vague outline of my passage-maker on the outskirts.
"You know, it is not necessary to compel me; I would come willingly if you would only summon me."
I sighed heavily. "I've been trying that, but it wasn't working. I'm not even sure how I did this other than to lose my cool."
"In any case ... what may I do for you this good night?"
"You can take me and my friends to the Underworld. Oh, and your sister Moriah sends her hellos."
Garrett stepped closer to me, his face pinched up in a definite scowl.
"Did I say something wrong?" I asked, gauging his reaction closely.
"Merely that you have had contact with my sister. I find the concept disturbing, to be honest."
"Yeah, well, I found her sword in my chest to be pretty disturbing too, if you want to know the truth. But now that she doesn't have it anymore, I guess I don't have to worry about that little problem."
Garrett reached out as if to touch my arm. "You have ... you have her weapon? How can that be? It only goes to the one who defeats her." He frowned. "Is she ... gone?"
"Pfft. Please. As if I could kill a demon. No, I just took her sword away from her and made it so she couldn't get it back, that's all. Apparently, that's enough to earn the sword or whatever. I don't really want it, so if you want to take it you're welcome to it."
He shook his head. "I would not bring that bad energy onto my person for all the quid in the world."
"Squid? Is that some sort of weird trading thing in the Underworld? Seems like it'd make everyone kind of smelly."
"Not squid. Quid. It is money."
"Ohhhh, quid ... of course. Yeah. Me neither. I don't want it."
"No, you do want it," he argued. "Trust me, this you do want for yourself."
"Why?"
"Just ... trust me. In the Underworld, you will want this weapon, if the Underworld is indeed where you wish to go."
I nodded. "I do. And I want my friends to go with me. Can you guide us? Be our passage-maker or whatever?"
He nodded back at me. "Yes, I can. I believe I owe you at least that much."
I smiled, liking the idea of a vampire owing me a favor a lot. "Oh, yeah? How so? The yummy fresh blood I anteed up before?"
"That and giving me the opportunity to explain myself to Shayla. For that I will be eternally grateful, and I do not say this lightly. I have spent what felt like a large piece of eternity in a very dark place, and I never wish to return."
"I don't think your sister feels the same."
He scowled. "My sister has found her home, like many before her. You must be very careful when you enter, until the moment you are returned, and take heed of those truly deserving of the Underworld's gifts."
"She pretty much said the same thing about you. She said you're a liar. At least, I th
ink that's what she was saying. She's not much of a talker."
He shook his head. "Demons. I never could abide them."
"But you're one."
"I never made a vocation of it. She has. And believe me ... she is quite good at it. Nevertheless, I shall help you, and even then will not consider my debt to you as yet paid."
"Good to know. I've got bank with a vampire."
He gave me a half bow.
"So, do you mind if I ask you one more question before we go?"
"As you wish."
"What exactly did you do all those years ago that pissed Shayla off? And what do you have to do with Ben Hawthorne?"
"You said one question."
"So shoot me. I'm asking two."
"Do you want the long version or the short one?"
"How long will the long version take?"
Garrett looked up for a few seconds and then back at me, saying, "Approximately four days. Give or take."
"Give me the reeeaal short version. Nutshell of a nutshell kind."
"Good enough. An eon or so ago, I loved a girl. A fae girl by the name of Shayla Blackthorne. She was a bright and shining star, pulling everyone to her with her energy and enthusiasm for life. I never thought she would notice me, but she did. We had a whirlwind affair and pledged ourselves to one another.
And then one day the demons came. We repelled them, but more came in their place. Eventually our world was being threatened in such a way that the councils had to make a very difficult decision. And so they did, choosing to close the portal from which the demons were escaping. And in so doing, they also had to close the other portal, to keep the balance in the universe from shifting.
I was drawn to dispatch the guardian at the portal to the Underworld and Shayla to the other. We did our jobs and ended up following the path we sent those guardians on ourselves. It was a just and fair end, meted out for an unjust and unfair condemnation of creatures who merely did what they had always been asked to do."
"Yeah, but what about that whole, you're-a-big-fat-liar-and-I'll-never-trust-you stuff that Shayla was all pissed about?"
"Oh, that."
I crossed my arms over my chest. "Yeah. That."
"A misunderstanding we have cleared the air about."
"Clear it for me, then, if it's all so all's-cool-that-ends-cool for you guys."
He sighed. "I do not want you to get the wrong impression."
"I already am," I nearly growled in frustration. "Time's a-wastin', Garrett. Tell me what you did."
"I may have allowed a certain fae, or demon, to possess me for a short period of time."
My eyes bugged out. "No! Who?"
Garrett acted all casual, flicking off some lint from his jacket sleeve. "No one of consequence."
"You need to tell me right now before I get that sword out and do something bad with it."
"You can keep it or not, it is not my concern."
"I mean to you, dummy."
"Oh. In that case, perhaps I shall tell you the name of my possessor."
"What a fabulous idea," I said sarcastically. "And sometime in the next few minutes if you can manage it."
"He is a fae you know. Or a demon. I do not even know what he is at this point."
"Do you have a name by any chance? Is it Leck?"
"Leck? No. His name is Torrence Silverthorne."
My head reeled with the implications. "Are you serious?! You let that snake into your head and body?! What are you, nuts?"
"No, merely willing to do whatever it took to gain entry into the Underworld to do what must be done. That is all. I did what I did because I had no choice, and as much harm as it caused my beloved, I would have to do it all over again if I were back there once more. It was the only way. Shayla knows that now."
"So what ... ? You let him get into your body, he let you into the Underworld ... what did he do while he was in your body? Why did it piss Shayla off so much?"
He swallowed with some effort. "Well, it appears that while Torrie was out and about in my form, he came upon a very amorous Shayla and ... well ... took advantage of the situation in a way I had not yet done."
My mouth dropped open and stayed that way.
"Now, do not look at me like that, young Jayne. I told you, I had no choice!"
"You let that demon ... be with Shayla?"
"I did not let him do anything of the sort!" Garrett yelled, now clearly distraught. "He took advantage of his situation and used his guile to get her to lay with him! And she became impregnated with his seed and gave birth to his child! I will forever regret my decision to trust and believe that fae, but what is done is done, and I cannot go back. Believe me, I have paid and paid dearly for my error in judgment."
He was fuming, but not at me. Clearly his past was torturing him right now, and I decided that I wasn't going to make it any worse. Not on purpose, at least. But I still had questions.
"So where's the kid now? The baby that Shayla had."
One of Garrett's arms was folded against his chest now, and he was resting his chin in the other hand that was bent up, staring at the ground. His hand left his face after a few seconds to wave around distractedly. "He is running amok in the Here and Now. Raising the dead. Following in his father's footsteps." Garrett blew out a disgusted breath.
My face went white, I knew it did. I could feel the blood draining out in a hurry. My heart slowed almost to a stop and then thumped super hard to catch up, rushing its beats to push the adrenaline through my system. "What's his name?" I asked in a strangled voice, almost afraid to hear the answer.
Garrett dropped his arms and looked up at me sharply. "Certainly you do not need me to tell you that. Have you not twisted the dagger enough for one night?"
"No! I'm not twisting any daggers ... I just want to be sure I know who is who. I'm not hip to all the family tree stuff around here."
Garrett sighed, running his hands through his hair and causing his bangs to fall back down in his face. "I apologize. I forget you are but a babe in the woods here."
"Yeah. So tell me."
"Ben Hawthorne is his name. Ben Hawthorne."
I fell back onto the ground, my head hitting something not very hard, but enough to make my ears ring anyway. I looked up and saw Garrett above me, a worried expression on his face.
"Jayne! Are you okay? You appear to have fainted dead away. Are you ill?"
"Yeah, I'm ill," I grunted out as I sat up, my head still spinning. "You just told me I made out with my fucking half-brother. Wouldn't you be a little ill?"
Garrett pursed his lips together. "Oh. I see how that might be a bit upsetting; although, technically speaking, he would be more like a very, very distant cousin. It's not uncommon for people to be bound or intimate with ancestors that distant and not even know it."
"Whatever. It's gross." I shook my head, trying to put everything together. There were too many pieces, and I couldn't get them all to connect. "So let me get this straight ... you traded bodies with Torrie. He came out, probably searching for Maléna, since I heard he got sent to the Underworld by the Fates but he wasn't really supposed to be there. He shagged your girl, got her pregnant ... then what? You got your body back?"
"Yes. I slayed the dragon, ended up in the Underworld permanently, and got my body back."
"So how is it that Ben carries the Hawthorne dragon fang?"
"I suppose it's because I was still in Torrie's form when I killed the dragon. It surrendered the fang to me, as a Silverthorne, though I was and still am a Hawthorne. The possession blurs the lines of who is who or what."
"So Ben isn't a Hawthorne."
"He is. Part Hawthorne, part Silverthorne. In theory, he could carry the weapon as either heir, but he is not of pure blood."
"Well, this explains a lot. Like why Ben is such an ass all the time. He's part Torrie-demon."
"Torrie is not all bad, Jayne. You need to understand that. He is just very ambitious and determined."
I raised my eye
brows. "Wow. That's pretty generous considering what he did to you and your girl."
"Believe me ... I have had a thousand years to come to terms with what happened. It has lent me no small measure of perspective. Torrie was treated unfairly, and all because he was a passionate fae, deeply in love with someone who hurt him. Shayla was a force to be reckoned with. It was only natural that he would be drawn to her, in my body, in my mind, privy to all my thoughts. And it was only natural that she be drawn to him, thinking it was me."
I thought about Spike being possessed, and I could see where he was going with this. "But Torrie should have known better."
Garrett shrugged. "We are all imperfect beings, and we make mistakes we later regret. I believe he regrets this decision."
I snorted. "He seems to enjoy the whole demon thing."
"The lure is certainly there ... surrounded by violence every moment of every day, passing eons of time in the company of those who have made bad decisions the highlight of their lives as fae. For many, it is just easier to make the simple choice. The downhill slide rather than the uphill climb."
"And you say Shayla has forgiven you?"
"Yes. I know that she has."
"That's pretty big of her."
"Yes, well, there is the small matter of her having stabbed me in the heart with her dragon fang and ending my life in the Here and Now that makes her perhaps more forgiving than she might normally be."
"Whaaaat?" I asked, partially laughing. "She stabbed your sorry ass?"
"Yes. Quite so. It was not pleasant."
I laughed until my stomach hurt. "Well, good for her," I finally got out. "You totally deserved it."
"Yes. I agree."
I sighed. "So, what else do I need to know from you?"
"I do not know. But if my guess is right, I would say that you should be moving on soon."
"Why?" I asked, still smiling, picturing Shayla kicking his cheating ass to the curb with a nice stab to the heart. How poetic.
"Because your friends are in trouble in the Underworld and are in need of your assistance."