LETTER LVI
MR. LOVELACE, TO JOHN BELFORD, ESQ.PARIS, OCT. 14.
---- ---- Timor & minae Scandunt eodum quo dominus; neque Decedit aerata triremi; & Post equitem sedet atra cura.
In a language so expressive as the English, I hate the pedantry oftagging or prefacing what I write with Latin scraps; and ever was acensurer of the motto-mongers among our weekly and daily scribblers.But these verses of Horace are so applicable to my case, that, whetheron ship-board, whether in my post-chaise, or in my inn at night, I amnot able to put them out of my head. Dryden once I thought said verywell in these bouncing lines:
Man makes his fate according to his mind. The weak, low spirit, Fortune makes her slave: But she's a drudge, when hector'd by the brave. If Fate weave common thread, I'll change the doom, And with new purple weave a nobler loom.
And in these:
Let Fortune empty her whole quiver on me, I have a soul, that, like an ample shield, Can take in all, and verge enough for more. Fate was not mine: nor am I Fate's---- Souls know no conquerors.----
But in the first quoted lines, considering them closely, there is nothingbut blustering absurdity; in the other, the poet says not truth; forCONSCIENCE is the conqueror of souls; at least it is the conqueror ofmine; and who ever thought it a narrow one?----But this is occasionedpartly by poring over the affecting will, and posthumous letter. What anarmy of texts has she drawn up in array against me in the letter!--Butyet, Jack, do they not show me, that, two or three thousand years ago,there were as wicked fellows as myself?--They do--and that's someconsolation.
But the generosity of her mind displayed in both, is what stings me most.And the more still, as it is now out of my power any way in the world tobe even with her.
I ought to have written to you sooner; but I loitered two days at Calais,for an answer to a letter I wrote to engage my former travelling valet,De la Tour; an ingenious, ready fellow, as you have heard me say. I haveengaged him, and he is now with me.
I shall make no stay here; but intend for some of the Electoral Courts.That of Bavaria, I think, will engage me longest. Perhaps I may step outof my way (if I can be out of my way any where) to those of Dresden andBerlin; and it is not impossible that you may have one letter from me atVienna. And then, perhaps, I may fall down into Italy by the Tyrol; andso, taking Turin in my way, return to Paris; where I hope to see Mowbrayand Tourville; nor do I despair of you.
This a good deal differs from the plan I gave you. But you may expect tohear from me as I move; and whether I shall pursue this route or theother.
I have my former lodgings in the Rue St. Antoine, which I shall hold,notwithstanding my tour; so they will be ready to accommodate any two ofyou, if you come hither before my return; and for this I haveconditioned.
I write to Charlotte; and that is writing to all my relations at once.
Do thou, Jack, inform me duly of every thing that passes.--Particularly,how thou proceededst in thy reformation-scheme; how Mowbray and Tourvillego on in my absence; whether thou hast any chance for a wife; [I am themore solicitous on this head, because thou seemest to think that thymortification will not be complete, nor thy reformation secure, till thouart shackled;] how the Harlowes proceed in their penitentials; if MissHowe be married, or near being so; how honest Doleman goes on with hisempiric, now he has dismissed his regulars, or they him; and if anylikelihood of his perfect recovery. Be sure be very minute; for everytrifling occurrence relating to those we value, becomes interesting, whenwe are at a distance from them. Finally, prepare thou to piece thybroken thread, if thou wouldst oblige
ThyLOVELACE.