As Soren sent me a smug snicker, Vienne shook her head, her eyes soft with…what was that emotion? Sympathy, perhaps? “No, sorry,” she said, letting me know it was definitely sympathy. “That wasn’t a pity loss. I actually did want to beat you. Quite desperately.”
I nodded gravely and stood. “Then I’m sorry for your loss.”
“Oh, on the contrary,” she countered happily, sighing contentedly as she stood and readjusted Anniston in her arms. “It was one of the most exceptional defeats I’ve ever experienced. You made the game entertaining. Thank you for the competition, Prince Urban.”
The words were formal and distant, even the hand she stretched my way was ceremoniously polite. But the emotions it stirred in me were anything but proper.
I looked at her hand and knew I couldn’t touch her in this moment. With a glance toward her husband, who glared at me as if he knew exactly what I really wanted to do with his wife and her hand, I turned back to Vienne and quickly took her fingers.
The moment immediately cemented itself into my head with a permanence I knew I’d never forget. The first time we voluntarily touched each other, aside from that moment I’d saved her life with a kiss. This time, it was instigated by her and she was awake and alive and cognizant of every moment of it…just as I was.
Her fingers were cool but soft, the pressure in her shake formal but friendly. It was in no way meant to be passionate, and yet my world shifted on its axis. I would’ve burned kingdoms to the ground, laid waste to her entire family, fought wars just to shake her hand again.
But she let go within moments, and I was compelled to follow suit, releasing my grip as soon as she did, to make her happy.
“Thank you,” I murmured, meaning it from the bottom of my heart. “I look forward to our next round.”
She opened her mouth to answer. The smile in her eyes told me she was about to agree to more games in the future, but Soren bit out, “Don’t count on it, Prince.”
I glared at him for interrupting, for being a dick, for simply being the obstacle in the way of my happily ever after.
Having had enough of the man for one day, I kept his gaze as I spoke to his wife. “Is he always such an overbearing ass of a tyrant with you, my lady, dictating what you may and may not do? Or is this caveman, chest-thumping act purely for my benefit?”
“You’re a fucking schmuck,” Soren sneered.
“Oh?” I said, lifting an eyebrow. “Why don’t we wait until I micromanage every move my wife makes and then threaten to rape your sister before we compare who’s the bigger schmuck, shall we?”
Soren stepped toward me, but Vienne said, “No.” She sighed and rubbed at a spot on her temple, revealing she had a headache. “That’s enough arguing this evening, if you please, gentlemen.”
I bowed to her wishes, instantly contrite. “Of course, my lady. My apologies.”
She sent me a tired, defeated glance before turning to Soren. “Escort me and Anniston to our room, would you?”
He shifted his scowl from me to nod agreeably at Vienne. Then he crooked an elbow, which she took, wrapping the very same fingers she’d used to shake with me to grip his arm. And away they went, married and bound together in ways I would never be to her.
The triumph I’d felt over spending time with her, meeting her gaze across the chess table, and touching her hand came crashing down with the bitter taste of reality. She wasn’t mine. She would never be mine. Why was I torturing myself this way?
But then…then she glanced over her shoulder at me as she and Soren reached the doorway, and my heart thudded hard in my chest when she gifted me with an apologetic smile.
Suddenly, I understood why. Table scraps were better than starving. That’s why I stayed.
Chapter 25
Urban
I might have stretched the truth a bit when I’d told Vienne my back wounds were fine. The fact was they irritated the hell out of me. The skin that had knitted back together stretched and burned every time I overextended my arms, like lifting them to remove my tunic.
Wincing, I discarded the shirt and spent another minute rotating my shoulders to get the scar tissue used to movement.
The first day I’d returned to the back bailey for training, I’d torn one cut open and it had started bleeding like a son of a bitch, so I’d mostly been yelling instructions since then. But I was getting tired of that. I needed action, combat, especially after I’d just watched my one true love depart to her room for the evening with her husband.
Convincing myself they were only tucking Anniston into her crib together before Soren went off to his own room far, far away from Vienne’s, I collapsed onto my back on my bed and stared up at the ceiling, feeling empty, only to wince when the mattress’s contact with my scars started to smart.
What had started as a restless evening had turned into revitalization in so many ways, only to switch to defeat by the end of the night.
Was this honestly how I was going to spend the rest of my life, aching for innocent games of chess in the evenings and yelling the same instructions over and over again to a group of sweaty soldiers during the day?
I wanted more than that. Yet I couldn’t break this hold I felt to stay close to her.
I’d already forgotten about my original goals to protect Allera. She’d settled in quite nicely with Brentley; she could take care of herself. And of course, I knew Vienne could see to herself as well; she was more competent than many gave her credit for. But I still wanted to remain close, witness her life, share her joys, grieve in her sorrows; I ached to be a part of all of that. With her.
So any ideas I might’ve had to leave this place and start fresh somewhere else drifted away as sleep claimed me.
I didn’t dream about the sand-heaped mounts of Donnelly or its darling little oasis in Mandalay, though. I transported myself to High Cliff, at the edge of the sea. Sitting on a lush green carpet of grass with my elbows resting on my bent knees, I watched the water froth and foam with a fascination that enthralled me. It was so savage and wild, yet majestic and poetically peaceful.
When I felt her presence nearing me from behind, a ripple of pleasure raced across my flesh. She sat beside me, close enough for our elbows to brush, her skin warm and dry. Inviting.
“Where is this?” she asked, wiping her windblown, blonde hair out of her eyes as she gazed at the sea as well.
I glanced at her, smiling softly as I watched the appreciation in her gaze. “It’s my childhood,” I said. “The Bjorn Cliffs.”
She looked up at me before returning her attention to the water. “So, that’s the Great Sea? I’ve never seen it before. It’s quite angry, isn’t it?”
I laughed and shook my head, amused by the description. “Angry?”
With a shrug, she grinned up at me. “Well, what would you call it?”
Biting my lip, I looked upon the sea as well. “Powerful,” I finally decided, flicking out a finger to point. “That there is just a little show of intimidation, flexing its muscles so you know who the alpha is.”
“Arrogant, then?”
“Definitely,” I agreed. “But it can afford to be. It has the clout to back up its roar.”
“Hmm. You really can’t see to the other side of it,” she mused. “I could never envision it whenever I’d heard the tales; I’m so used to sand, but now that I’m seeing it…” She shook her head. “It’s breathtaking. Do you really think there are other lands out there beyond it?”
I glanced at her curiously. “What? Didn’t you believe the explorers from Near Shore who claimed to have been to the Great Beyond?”
She only shrugged. “I’m not sure. I know they returned with artifacts, proving they’d been elsewhere, but the artifacts could’ve come from Corandra for all we know. The explorers were so sick and delirious, and they died soon after arriving home. It makes me wonder if one can truly believe the ramblings of crazy men.”
I smiled. “I don’t know. Sometimes the insane speak with more clarity t
han those lost in reality.”
She bumped her shoulder into mine. “Oh, so you’re a philosopher now, are you?”
I winked at her. “Just trying to impress you.”
She rolled her eyes but kept grinning as she sighed and returned her attention to the sea. “I wonder why we named ourselves the Outer Realms. Maybe whoever it is over there is the outer parts of us and not the other way around.”
I nodded. “Possibly. I mean, none of their explorers have ever made it over here to gather artifacts from us, now have they? It only makes sense that we’re more advanced and capable than them.” With a nod, I added, “Yes, I think you’re right. We should petition to rename ourselves to the…the…”
When I couldn’t come up with a suitable name, Vienne threw out a suggestion. “The Inner Realms?”
I laughed. “Yes. Exactly. I hereby rename us the Inner Realms.”
Chuckling as well, Vienne hooked her elbow through mine and scooted close enough that our sides pressed together. Then she rested her chin on my shoulder as she let out a delighted sigh. “You can be the one to petition that suggestion to Caulder.”
“Oh no,” I murmured, bumping against her playfully. “I believe that should fall to you. You’re the unassumingly persuasive one, after all.”
She started to roll her eyes before she looked up at me with a slight frown. “Wait. How did you know Nicolette had called me that?”
“Because I was hiding behind the curtains in the East Salon when she did.” The confession came easily, probably because this was a dream, I was sleeping, and my thoughts were utterly unfiltered. “I was watching you nap that day when she barged in.”
Her eyes widened. “Were you? Is this a habit of yours I should be concerned about?”
Shaking my head, I reached out to softly trace the outline of her face with my fingers. “Not at all, my lady. I’ve already decided not to spy on you like that again. It felt…invasive and wrong.” My gaze slid to hers. “And I don’t wish to wrong you. Ever.”
She had such dark brown eyes. They seemed to peer straight inside me as if reading every intimate facet of my soul. Then, with a small smile, she reached up and touched my mark. “Why do your people do this? Really?”
My eyes closed at the feel of her touch before I reopened them. Watching her study me, I said, “I’ve always teased that I have no idea why. But actually, I think I do know. A part of me understands, anyway. There’s just something about pairs that make things run more efficiently. Whoever started the custom wanted our kingdom to last as long as it could. I mean, don’t we move better on two legs? See better with two eyes. Hear better with two ears?”
Grinning, she slid her finger down from the corner of my eye to tap at the end of my nose. “Then why don’t we have two noses?”
“Ah, because we have two nostrils in each nose,” I answered before I nuzzled my nose into her neck.
She laughed and gripped my hair, controlling the tickle.
Not able to tease long before desire swelled, I moved my mouth to the flesh under her ear and gripped her hips in my hands. “Two hearts beat stronger than one,” I murmured. “We’re supposed to complement each other. Like night and day doling out the measurement of time, fire and ice to tell us the difference in temperature, black and white to give each color variety, salt and pepper to season our food, thunder and lightning to warn us of a storm—”
“Hugs and kisses to show the best affection,” she added, wrapping her arms around me and resting her cheek against my heartbeat.
“Exactly.” I hugged her back and kissed her cheek. “Being matched to you doesn’t take away what you already are. It can only add to it. You are still you, and I am still me. This will always be. We can take care of ourselves, live our own lives, go on our own journeys, but together…together, we make us, and traveling as an us down one road on our separate journeys... Well, we can help the other along the way, share our unique perspectives, encourage and entertain one another, combat the loneliness, love unceasingly.”
She lifted her face, her brown eyes solemn. “Except we can’t be together.”
I only smiled. “We’re together now.”
“Yes.” She rolled her eyes. “But this isn’t real.” Then she had to wrinkle her nose as if unsure whether she supported her own claim or not. “Right?”
Leaning in, I let my breath whisper against her ear. “It certainly feels real.”
She shuddered from the sensation, and goose bumps appeared on her arms. Looking up, she shook her head. “No. I would never feel this comfortable with you in real life. I certainly wouldn’t be so familiar with your person or act as if I knew you so well. It’s a dream,” she insisted with certainty.
“Then let’s never wake up,” I encouraged, kissing her jaw once, twice, then working my way to the side of her throat and moving down.
“Urban,” she said in a halfhearted protest even as she tipped her head to the side, allowing me more access. “We shouldn’t.”
“But it’s a dream,” I cajoled. “We can’t control what we do in our dreams. You certainly couldn’t seem to control yourself in that dream you had about me taking you against the wall, now could you?”
“No, but…” Her eyes flared open and she straightened to look at me with a slight frown. “Wait, you’re right. I didn’t seem to have any control in that dream? Why is this one so different? Why do I feel the sense of rationality to even protest this?”
I shrugged easily before saying, “Probably because this one is my dream and for some reason, I wish you to have your wits about you.” Then I frowned at myself and scratched my temple. “Though, for the life of me, I can’t imagine why I’d want that. I’d much rather you be stretched out naked and under me on this grass right now. Damn.” I snapped my fingers and waved my hand around the air over her head. “Okay, new dream. Lose your mind to lust for me, starting…now.”
She blinked at me before wrinkling her nose. “I don’t think it worked.”
“I don’t think it did either,” I grumbled. “Fuck. I was really looking forward to commanding a sex dream with you, too. Because oh, my sweet Vienne,” I told her with promise glittering in my eyes. “The things I would do to you…” Letting out a low whistle, I shook my head sadly. “You wouldn’t have been able to walk right the next day.”
Interest glittered in her eyes. “Really? Like…” Licking her lips, she glanced down demurely. “Like what would you have done?”
“A little bit of everything, I expect.” Reaching out, I cupped her jaw in my hand before sliding my fingers down her throat to the top button of her dress. “But I probably would’ve started slow. Soft.” Popping the top button at the base of her throat, I slid my fingers under the cloth so I could caress her collarbone. “Explore the terrain first, appreciate every dip and groove. Discover and learn.”
When another button released on its own, opening the cloth at her throat wider, I leaned in to press my mouth against the center of her breastbone. “The first journey to a new place should never be rushed, don’t you think?” I opened more buttons to reveal the top swell of her breasts. “It should be savored. Treasured.”
When her nipple came into view, I clasped it greedily between my teeth. She groaned and sank all ten fingers in my hair before gripping and shifting closer, climbing into my lap until she was riding me, the thick ridge of my erection fitting right up against the notch between her legs.
“Oh God,” she moaned, tossing her head back and clutching me harder as I shifted my attention from one breast to the other. “Oh God.”
She ground down until I let out a strangled grunt. “Or you could call me Urban,” I teased, lifting my face to trail kisses up the side of her throat.
“Urban,” she gasped, clutching at me with hard fingers as she clamped her thighs around my hips and rode me with a rhythm that was growing increasingly too hot way too fast.
“Easy, my love,” I murmured, clutching her waist and easing her onto the grass before I urged h
er to lie back and relax.
“But I want—”
I placed a finger against her lips and smiled into her brown eyes. “I know,” I said. “And I’ll give it. I’ll give you everything.”
“But—”
“Starting here,” I went on, reaching just under the skirt of her dress to catch her ankle in my hand.
Vienne fell silent and went still as she watched me caress the underside of her foot before I placed a kiss to the arch and then the heel, then the ends of her toes.
“You’re very good at that,” she said.
I smiled, meeting her gaze as my mouth moved up, over the notch at her ankle and toward her knees. Her breath caught, chest heaved, and eyes glazed with interest the further I moved, one kiss at a time. I liked watching her watch me, her awe and delight was palatable. I could almost taste her pleasure, which was actually the ultimate goal here. Tasting her one lick at a time.
“Urban,” she said with much hesitation, her eyes widening as my attention moved above her knee to the tender inside of her thigh.
“It’s okay,” I assured her, my smile soft before my tongue came out to slide along warm flesh. “It’s just a dream, remember?”
“Oh my God!” With a yelp of shock, she tried to sit up, which dislodged me from my path. Her breaths were unsteady, chest heaving, and expression dazed. “What were you doing?”
No one had ever tasted her there before. The realization gave me a jolt of power; I was more than eager to give her her first experience.
“Hey, it’s okay,” I murmured, sitting up myself so I could take her hands and press my brows to hers. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”
But I was determined to continue.
She sucked in a breath and shook her head. “You didn’t. I just… It’s just that… It felt like more than I could handle.”
With a nod of understanding, I kissed the tip of her nose. “Do you trust me?”
Looking up into my eyes, she stared at me solemnly before whispering, “Yes.”