Page 10 of Growl


  *****

  Lacey forced her heavy lids open and tried to focus her vision. The first thing she saw was Jesse asleep right beside her in the bed. It took a minute for everything that happened to come back to her and when it did, she sprung up from the bed and backed into the corner, never taking her eyes off of Jesse.

  Her movements woke him up and he looked at her. “Lacey? Are you okay?” he asked in a sleepy voice as he rubbed his eyes.

  Lacey looked around the room frantically. Her eyes landed on the door. Jesse immediately sensed that something was wrong. She looked terrified. He got out of bed and walked toward her.

  “Stop!” Lacey yelled. “Don’t come any closer, Jesse. I don’t want to have to hurt you.”

  He stopped and gave her a pleading look. “Lacey...please don’t be afraid of me. I know that you’re scared about what you saw...but I would never hurt you.”

  She stared at him. “What the hell are you?”

  Jesse frowned. “I could ask you the same thing. But to answer your question, I’m a werewolf and so was everyone you saw...including my brother.”

  Lacey’s mouth dropped open a moment before she let out a half nervous, half hysterical laugh. She was so confused and her mind was so messed up that she wasn’t even sure whether or not she was actually awake. “You’re a werewolf. Right. And I’m the wicked witch of the east. Now can we please get back to reality? If I’m dreaming, please wake me up. I don’t like this dream. This can’t be real.” Her whole body trembled as she rubbed her hands up and down her arms nervously.

  Jesse took a few steps toward her and held out his hand. Lacey cringed further into the corner. He hated seeing her so confused and scared. “You know it is, Lacey. You saw it for yourself. You saw those men shift into wolves. I know it’s a lot to take in, but I have to tell you that I’m just as shocked by you as you are of me.”

  Lacey narrowed her eyes at him and held her head up straight but didn’t say anything. She wasn’t ready to talk about her powers, not until she found out more about him first.

  “I saw what you did last night. We all did. You’re different from normal humans” Jesse said.

  Lacey let out a girlish chuckle and nodded her head. “You can say that again.”

  Jesse took a few more steps toward her and eased his hand around hers and squeezed it slightly. He gave her such a gentle smile that he succeeded in calming her nerves just a bit. She let him pull her from the corner and lead her back to the bed. She sat down then scooted away when Jesse sat down beside her.

  “Please talk to me. Tell me what’s going on with you, Lacey. Why were you in so much pain?” he asked.

  Lacey pulled her hand from his and shook her head. “No...I don’t want to talk about me. I want to know about you. I want to know how everything I saw last night is possible.” Images from the fight came back to her and she squeezed her eyes shut to force them away. She was having a hard time believing what she saw. Things like werewolves didn’t exist, but she couldn’t deny what she saw. When she opened her eyes again, she looked at Jesse, her blue eyes caught his and held them.

  Jesse tensed at the look on her face. She looked like she was about to break down from the stress and fear of everything. He wanted to pull her into his arms and make her feel safe. But he stopped himself, the last thing he needed was to get close to her.

  “How did you become a...werewolf?” Lacey asked in a small voice.

  Jesse chuckled at the way she said werewolf. “I was born this way.”

  Lacey looked away. “Do...do you hurt people? I mean...when you’re a wolf.”

  Jesse thought about her question and how he was going to answer it. He didn’t want to scare her any more than she already was but she needed to know the truth about his kind. “No, I don’t hurt people and neither do my friends downstairs. Most of us are decent people just trying to fit in and live our lives. But there are some who do kill humans. They hunt them for sport. The humans that aren’t killed during the hunt are changed.”

  “What do you mean they’re changed?” Lacey asked.

  Jesse looked away, not wanting to see the horror on her face as he answered. “They’re changed into one of us” he paused, “a bite from a werewolf while in animal form changes the human.”

  Lacey gasped and covered her mouth with her hand. “That’s horrible.”

  “Yes, it is” Jesse agreed. “My friends and I try to save as many humans as we can but there is only so much we can do.” He sounded frustrated.

  Lacey looked at him as understanding finally hit her. “Your brother...Cole. He’s one of the ones that hunt humans. That first night I met him, he was hunting me, wasn’t he? Is that why he wants me now, because I got away?”

  Jesse shook his head. “That might have something to do with it. But I think he wants you because of what you can do. He probably thinks he can use you somehow. Your talent is extremely unique. And I’m sure he’s interested in it.”

  “My talent? Don’t you mean my curse?” Lacey said with disgust and rolled her eyes. “A talent is something you should be proud of and I can assure you, I’m not proud of what I can do. My talent as you call it has brought me nothing but pain and anguish. Not even my own parents could stand to be around me. My father left when I was four. And my mother has been afraid of me my whole life. I was born with the ability to move things with my mind, do you know how weird that is?” She sighed. “I’ve been an outcast since the day I was born. The only people who aren’t afraid of me are the ones that want to study me like I’m some kind of lab rat. And all I want is to be normal.”

  “What about the nose bleeds and the headaches? Are you sick?”

  Lacey shook her head. “I don’t know. The nose bleeds started about six months ago. And the headaches only started a few weeks ago, but they’re getting worse every time I have one. The only time I have either is when I use my powers. I guess they’re getting worse now because I’m using my powers a lot more than usual.”

  “Have you been to a doctor to see what’s wrong?”

  Lacey jumped up from the bed. “No! I hate doctors and hospitals. Whatever is wrong with me will go away on its own. It’s probably just stress.” Even as she said the words, she didn’t believe them. She knew that something was wrong with her and she was starting to get really scared. She was getting weaker and more fatigued every day. But there was no way she was ever going to go back to a hospital.

  “Why are you so afraid of hospitals?” Jesse pressed.

  Lacey gave him a hard stare before answering. “Let’s just say I haven’t had good experiences with them. But enough about me. It’s your turn to answer some questions. Assuming that I haven’t completely lost my mind and everything that I saw was real...werewolves apparently exist. How was everyone able to change into wolves? It was the middle of the day when they showed up here. I thought you’d need a full moon or something.”

  Jesse smiled. “We’re not really werewolves. That’s just a name we’ve kinda adopted because of all the Hollywood hype. We’re shapeshifters. We can change at will. The moon has no control over us whatsoever.”

  Lacey plopped down in the chair by the bed and pouted her lips. “That sucks. So basically, Cole can hunt people whenever he wants. He’s not limited to certain times that he can do it.”

  Jesse lowered his head and said in a sad tone, “Unfortunately no, he’s not.”

  Lacey was quiet for a while after that. She didn’t know else what to say. Knowing that people were being murdered by a psycho who could change into a wolf, put her at a loss for words. It made her feel like she was trapped in a horror movie.

  “Can I ask you a personal question?” Jesse asked.

  Lacey let out a small chuckle. “Why not, you’ve answered all my questions.”

  “Who is Cindy? A few times in your sleep, you started crying and saying her name.”

  Lacey immediately froze up and gave him a hard stare. A small pain hit her in the chest at the mention of Cindy’s name. “
She...she was my friend. I met her when I first got here and she let me stay with her.” Lacey looked away and wiped a tear from her eye before it could roll down her cheek. “She’s dead. Someone killed her two days ago.”

  “I’m so sorry” Jesse said as he brushed Lacey’s hair behind her ear, rubbing the side of her face with his hand in the process. She looked in his eyes and saw the compassion in them and before she could stop herself, she flung her arms around his neck and buried her face in his shoulder. She had been trying so hard to be brave and handle everything: being a runaway, Cindy’s death, the fact that people could change into animals, and knowing that there was something seriously wrong with her, but she wasn’t strong enough to deal with everything on her own anymore. She wanted someone to hold her and tell her that everything was going to be okay. She held onto Jesse as tightly as she could while her tears flowed.

  Jesse rubbed her back and tried to comfort her. “It’s alright, Lacey. You’re safe and everything is going to be okay.”

  She pulled back and looked at him with red tear filled eyes. She tried to speak though the sob building in her throat. “I’m sorry. I don’t normally cry. I’m more of the keep everything to myself type, at least I used to be. But I’m not strong enough to deal with all of this. People are dying, others are turning into big dogs and I’m being pursued by a man that probably wants to chain me in his basement and make me use my powers to hurt people. I can’t go to the police for help because then I’ll be sent back to my parents and my stepdad will have me committed to the mental hospital again, I feel like I’m dying and I think I’m falling for a guy who isn’t even human. I am so messed up” she babbled and dropped her head back to his shoulder.

  Jesse continued rubbing her back. He’d heard everything she said but his mind was stuck on the part about her falling for some guy. He couldn’t help but hope she was talking about him even though he knew they couldn’t be together. There was a war going on inside him. The rational part of him knew that he should keep his distance. It was safer for Lacey that way. But another part of him wanted to wrap her up in his arms and keep her like that forever.

  Jesse had never felt any kind of connection with a woman before. He’d had plenty of women in his lifetime, but he never felt anything for them. His reasons for being with them were the same as theirs for being with him...primal need. They’d both get what they wanted and move on. It was the way he preferred things, no emotional attachment. But now he was breaking his own rule. He rested his head on top of Lacey’s. Just holding her in his arms felt like heaven to him and it was hard to let go, but for both their sakes, he did.

  After a few minutes, he gently pushed Lacey back and stepped away from her. She looked at him, her eyes met his and without thinking, she closed the distance between them and kissed him on the cheek. “Thank you...for everything: saving me, bringing me here and for just being nice to me” she whispered then looked away shyly.

  Jesse was caught off guard by her actions. His heart raced in his chest. He knew he should say something but he didn’t know what to say. He couldn’t get past the fact that Lacey had kissed him. You’d think it was his first time ever being kissed by a girl the way he was standing there, staring at her all tongue-tied. Heat flushed to his cheek where Lacey’s lips had touched him, making the spot seem extra sensitive. His eyes dropped to her mouth, the urge to kiss her almost made him quiver in his resolve to stay away from her. He raised his hand and rested it on the side of her face. “You don’t have to thank me for anything.” The desire in his voice was hard to hide.

  Lacey smiled at him and before she could talk herself out of it, she leaned in and kissed him again. This time, more passionately. Her lips brushed gently over his, making his body tense up so badly that he felt like a statue. Jesse fought hard not to give in to her kiss, but his restraint was at its breaking point. She touched her soft lips to his once more and that was all it took. Ignoring the tiny voice in his head that told him to run out of the room, he grabbed her around the waist and pulled her closer.

  Lacey wrapped her arms around Jesse’s neck as their kiss deepened. She never expected her first kiss to be so rough, but she liked it. Or maybe it was just that she liked Jesse so much that she didn’t care about how rough he was. As they kissed, he pushed her back toward the bed. She fell, pulling him down on top of her.

  Jesse growled low in the back of his throat. The passion and desire building in him was too strong to push away. No one, human or werewolf had ever made him feel the way Lacey did. What was it about her that ignited so much emotion within him? He looked down at her hoping to find the answer. Her lips were swollen and red from their kiss, her eyes still glassy from crying, she looked so human. The thought froze him in place. Human. She’s human. Those words repeated over and over in his mind, causing his body to stiffen. Lacey tried to kiss him again and he shook his head. With a heavy heart, Jesse pushed himself up from the bed.

  Lacey looked hurt. “What’s wrong?” she asked and reached for him again but he moved farther away from her.

  Jesse ran his hand through his jet black hair and let out a deep breath. “We can’t do this, Lacey. It’s not right. You don’t know what you’re getting yourself into. I’m not like you, I’m not human” he said the words like they caused him pain.

  “I know what you are, Jesse. And I still like you.”

  “You don’t even know me. How can you say that you like me?”

  “True, I don’t know as much as I’d like to know about you, but I do know that you’ve saved my life twice. You brought me into your home and have treated me with nothing but respect. You didn’t run away from me when you saw me use my powers and you haven’t made me feel like I’m a freak for having them in the first place. Already you’ve treated me better than anyone else ever has in my life.”

  Hearing Lacey talk like that made Jesse angry. Just the idea of anyone mistreating her made him want to go out and beat the hell out of everyone who had ever been mean to her. But it was just that kind of thinking that made him understand he was getting too close to her. And he couldn’t let that happen.

  “Lacey, I’m sorry that you’ve had a hard life. But you can’t go around trusting every person who shows you a little kindness. The world is full of people who lead misleading lives. People are very rarely who and what they say they are. I was doing my job when I saved you. I save humans from my brother’s pack and other’s like his all the time. But I never get involved with the humans that I save. You’re a nice girl but I’m not interested in you like that.”

  Lacey looked like she was about to cry again but she sucked it up, not wanting Jesse to see how much his rejection hurt her. “Then why did you kiss me?”

  Jesse walked over to the door. He hesitated before opening it. “That was a mistake and it won’t happen again.”

  Lacey wanted to scream. She didn’t think their kiss was a mistake. It was the first time anyone had ever kissed her and it obviously meant more to her than it did to him but she wasn’t going to let him know that. Instead she held her head high and acted like it was nothing. “Fine then...Do all werewolves feel the same way about human girls as you do?” she asked.

  Jesse paused in the doorway, not really wanting to answer her question. “No. It’s just my personal preference. Most of my kind don’t have a problem with dating and sometimes even marrying human women. But I think they’re wrong for doing so.”

  He started to tell her that those human women were the unlucky ones because they always ended up losing their human lives because once a shifter falls for a human woman, the change is forced upon her. Whether she wants to become a werewolf or not doesn’t matter. That’s what happened to his mother and that’s why he will never do that to anyone else. Jesse closed his eyes for a second and brought up an image of his mother the last time he saw her before she died. She looked so sad and defeated. He could never do that to anyone. He gave Lacey one last look before leaving the room.

  Lacey stared at the door fee
ling more hurt than she’d felt in a long time. She wasn’t used to letting people get close to her but she had let her guard down for Jesse. And to have him turn away from her, hurt more than she wanted to admit. She sat on the bed for a while berating herself for being stupid enough to think that someone like him would have been interested in her. At first, she was sad but after a while she became angry.

  Angry that Jesse didn’t think she was good enough for him, angry for not thinking better about herself and angry that she had never put any effort into finding someone who would want her. She didn’t want to live the rest of her life alone. She wanted to find a man that could accept her for who she was and love her. And if Jesse didn’t want to be that man, then she needed to forget about him and the stupid crush she had on him and move on. And she knew just the person to move on with.

  She got up and grabbed her backpack from the dresser and went into the bathroom. She looked at herself in the mirror and smiled. So what if Jesse didn’t want her, she was still going to show him what he was missing out on. She didn’t care that what she was about to do was childish, and completely unlike her. Her pride was hurt and she needed to get back at Jesse.

  *****

  “Kindal told me that you don’t plan on changing Lacey” Trevor said as soon as Jesse sat down on the couch beside him.

  Jesse glanced at him from the corner of his eye. He was not in the mood to talk about anything at the moment, especially not Lacey. His feelings for her were affecting him in a way that he couldn’t think about anything but her. And that wasn’t good. “No, I’m not and that’s all I’m going to say on the subject.”

  Trevor furrowed his brow and glared at him. “You don’t have a choice, Jesse. If you won’t change her then I will. She can’t stay human, she knows too much about us.”

  “I don’t care how much she knows! I am not changing her and neither are you!” Jesse yelled and brought his fist down hard on the arm of the couch. “This discussion is over.”

  Everyone in the room turned to look at him. Devon and Tyron abandoned their game of poker to watch him and Trevor. Tonya glanced over from the kitchen where she was cooking. And Scotty stayed quietly in the chair across from them. It was a rare occasion for Jesse to raise his voice at anyone in the pack and it took them all by surprise, all except for Trevor.

 
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